Umxholo
- 1. Asiyondlela ilula leyo
- 2. Ii-Three's's (uthando, uxabiso, ingqwalaselo)
- 3. Gcina iincwadi zakho zivulekile
- 4. Nxibelelana
- 5. Ukuthatha uxanduva
- 6. Ukumisela imigaqo ethile
- 7. Funa uncedo
- 8. Phinda ulayishe ulwalamano lwakho ngokwesondo
“Ukukopa nokuxoka ayizongxaki, zizizathu zokwahlukana. ” -U-Patti Callahan Henry
Esi sicatshulwa sichaza ukuba kunzima kanjani emntwini xa kufikwa ekuphuculeni ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki.
Ayisiyombono ilungileyo, kwasekuqaleni, ukukopela kumntu okuthanda ngokwenene.
Xa ubanjwe ukukopela, omnye wakho obalulekileyo unelungelo lokuphelisa ubudlelwane, emva koko. Ithemba, eliyinto ebalulekileyo kubudlelwane, liyashukunyiswa.
Akuzange kube lula ukwakha ubukhosi kuloo ndawo ingalinganiyo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ufuna ngokuzithandela iindlela zokwenza kwakhona ukuthembana emva kokukopela, singavuya ukukunceda.
Makhe sijonge ezinye zeendlela kunye neengcebiso indlela yokugcina umtshato emva kokungathembeki nobuxoki kwaye indlela yokuthemba umntu kwakhona emva kokukopela. Mhlawumbi oku kuya kukunceda ugcine ubudlelwane bakho kwaye wenze izinto zibengcono phakathi kwenu nobabini.
1. Asiyondlela ilula leyo
Into yokuqala ekufuneka uyiqonde malunga nendlela eya phambili kubudlelwane emva kokukopela kukuba ayizukuphinda ibe lula ukwakha ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki. Nobabini kufuneka nisebenze nzima. Awunakho ukubeka izinto egxalabeni lomntu kwaye ubayeke bathathe ingqumbo yempazamo.
Ke, ukuzimisela ukulungisa ubudlelwane kufuneka kuvele kuni nobabini. Ewe kuyakubakho amaxesha anzima kunye namathandabuzo amakhulu, kodwa kuya kufuneka uqonde imvelaphi yokuthandabuza ukuqonda ukungathembeki.
Ngexesha lokuqala, emva kokubanjwa, nobabini niyakube nikhwele. Yindalo kwaye ilindelekile. Kodwa ukuba nobudlelwane obuyimpumelelo emva kokukopela kufuneka uqiniseke ngento oyifunayo kwaye uqhubeke nokuhamba.
2. Ii-Three's's (uthando, uxabiso, ingqwalaselo)
Ngokwesiqhelo, xa sithetha ngokungathembeki kwaye ubudlelwane bunokugcinwa emva kokukopela, uthando nothando phakathi kwaba babini luyavavanywa.
Ukukopa okanye into eyenzekileyo xa uthando, ukuxabisa, kunye nothatho-nxaxheba kwelinye lamaqabane lisezantsi kunokubaluleka kwezinye. Ke, ekuphuculeni ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki, zama ukugxila kuthando, ukuxabisa, kunye nokujonga iqabane lakho.
Yenza izenzo zakho zibalwe ngokuxela nokwenza izinto kubo. Sukuhlala ucinga, 'baya kuqonda' okanye 'kufuneka baqonde.'
3. Gcina iincwadi zakho zivulekile
Ukuze wakhe ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki, kufuneka nivulelane izifuba. Ukufihla izinto ngekhe kube ngumbono olungileyo wokuphucula ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki. Kuya kufuneka ufunde ukungafihli nto kwaye ugcine iincwadi zakho zivulekile.
Xelela iqabane lakho ngezenzo zakho kwaye uphendule imibuzo yabo. Ukuba ufuna ukuphumelela ukuthembela kwabo, esi sesona sisombululo sisiso. Ukungabinako ukufihla kunye nokufihla izinto ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kongeza ipetroli emlilweni, ekufuneka siyiphephe nakweyiphi na indleko.
4. Nxibelelana
Unxibelelwano ngoyena ndoqo wobudlelwane obunempumelelo. Xa kuziwa ekwakheni ukuthembana emva kokuthandana, akufuneki uphoswe kunxibelelwano. Qiniseka ukuba unika ingqalelo ekhethekileyo kwindlela onxibelelana ngayo nakwinto onxibelelana ngayo.
Unxibelelwano ludlala indima ebalulekileyo ekuphuculeni ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki. Ke, yabelana ngayo yonke into eyenzekayo engqondweni nasentliziyweni yakho. Ewe, kuya kufuneka wabelane ngezinto eziqhubeka eofisini yakho ukuze enye ebalulekileyo ikuthembe kwakhona emva komtshato.
5. Ukuthatha uxanduva
Masinyaniseke ngokumasikizi ngento yokuba umcimbi awusoze ube luxanduva lomntu omnye. Xa ninobudlelwane, nobabini kufuneka wabelane ngoxanduva.
Ke, xa ikati iphumile ngaphandle kwebhokisi, endaweni yokulwa kwaye nityholana, vuthwa kwaye uyamkele impazamo. Wamkele umba kwaye kunye nifumane indlela yokuphuma kuwo, ukuba nisazimisele ukuba nobudlelwane obomeleleyo.
6. Ukumisela imigaqo ethile
Ungabulungisa njani ubudlelwane emva kokukopela? Kwaye ungamthemba njani umyeni wakho kwakhona?
Enye indlela kukuseka imigaqo ethile de ufumane ukuthembana kwakhona. Olunye uphawu lwakho olubalulekileyo luye lwaphuka emva kokungathembeki. Akusoze kube lula ukuba bangahoyi izinto kwaye baziphathe ngokungathi yonke into iqhelekile.
Kufuneka baqonde ukuba baya kudinga ixesha lokufumana kwakhona ukusuka kwingozi, kwaye kuyakuthatha ixesha ukuba izinto ziqheleke kwakhona. Yiyo loo nto nobabini kufuneka nisete imigaqo ekufuneka niyilandele ukubanceda baphinde bathembeke emva kokungcatshwa.
7. Funa uncedo
Ukusetha kwakhona yonke into yesiqhelo ayizukuba ngumsebenzi olula emva kokungathembeki. Uhambo lokuphucula ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki kunokuba nzima kwaye lucelomngeni.
Ukuba nobudlelwane obunempumelelo emva kokukopela, funa uncedo lomntu omaziyo nomthembileyo, okanye umcebisi onokukunceda isikhokelo sendlela onokuthembela ngayo kubudlelwane bakho.
Zama ukufumanisa ukuba ulwalamano lwakho luchaphazeleka kangakanani kukungathembeki ngokukhawuleza kwaye emva koko ufune uncedo lobuchwephesha ukoyisa nayiphi na imiqobo onokuthi ujongane nayo.
8. Phinda ulayishe ulwalamano lwakho ngokwesondo
Ukwakha ubudlelwane bakho ngokwesondo yeyona nto inzima ekuphuculeni ukuthembana emva kokungathembeki.
Ukuzibandakanya ngokwesondo neqabane lakho akuyi kuba lula kwaphela. Yiyo loo nto kufuneka uphinde uchaze ubudlelwane bakho ngokwesondo kwaye uthathe ikhefu, ukuba iyafuneka.
Ngaphandle kokuba ukhululekile kunye neqabane lakho kwakhona, ukuzibandakanya ngokwasemzimbeni akuyi kuba ngumbono olungileyo. Ke, Qonda imeko kwaye uthathe umnxeba ngokufanelekileyo.
Ukungathembeki kubudlelwane akuyonto intle. Kuhlala kubalulekile ukuba uhlale unyanisekile kwiqabane lakho kwaye ugcine ubudlelwane obunempilo nobomeleleyo. Ukuba uziva uthando luyancipha ebomini bakho, emva koko funa uncedo lweengcali ngaphambi kokuba lukhokelele kumcimbi.
Kuhlala kungcono ukuthatha isigqibo esivuthiweyo ukunqanda ukonakalisa ubudlelwane obuhle phakathi kwenu nobabini.