Umxholo
- Yiba neqela elifanelekileyo kwicala lakho
- Hlaziya izinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka
- Lazi ixesha lokucela uncedo
- Cinga ngemithombo eyongezelelweyo yengeniso
- Funda ukunandipha amaxesha akhethekileyo
- Sukukunciphisa ukubaluleka kwamaqela enkxaso
- Unayo le!
Nje ukuba ithathelwe ingqalelo njengengxaki yamashumi amathathu anamaxesha kunye namashumi amane, "uqhawulo-mtshato lwesilivere" okanye "uqhawulo mtshato" luye lwaba yinto eqhelekileyo. Kwiminyaka yakutshanje kuye kwakho ukunyuka kwamazinga oqhawulo-mtshato kwizibini ezingaphezulu kweminyaka engama-60:
USusan Brown, umlawuli-kunye weZiko leSizwe loPhando ngeeNtsapho kunye neMitshato kwiYunivesithi yaseBowling Green State uthi: Uqhawulo-mtshato Olungwevu kwaGrey.
Ukuqhawula umtshato kweli nqanaba kunye nenqanaba lobomi bakho kunika imiceli mngeni eyahlukileyo. Okwangoku, abantu abaninzi banokuchuma ngaphandle kweemeko ngokulandela amanyathelo ambalwa alula.
Yiba neqela elifanelekileyo kwicala lakho
Fumana igqwetha eligxile ekuqhawuleni umtshato, nakumcebisi wezemali. Uninzi lwabasetyhini, ngakumbi, abazazi izibonelelo esele zifumanekile kubo, ezinje ngesondlo kunye nomhlala phantsi emva kokuba betshatile ngaphezulu kweminyaka engama-20.
Xa uthatha isigqibo sokufaka ifayile yoqhawulo mtshato okanye ukuqala ukwahlukana kwetyala, qiniseka ukuba ubhala imicimbi ebalulekileyo. Sebenzisa ezi ziganeko ukukunceda ukuhambisa incoko yakho negqwetha lakho. Bhala imihla ebalulekileyo njengaxa wena okanye iqabane lakho niphumile okanye nenza iinzame zokudibana. Imihla apho iqabane lakho lithathe imali kwiakhawunti yakho edibeneyo okanye libonisa isimilo esikhathazayo, konke oku kubalulekile.
Okokugqibela, yenza iikopi zamaxwebhu abalulekileyo anjengeenkcukacha zebhanki, amaxwebhu omhlala-phantsi, iitayitile kunye nezihloko, amaphepha einshurensi, isatifikethi somtshato, izatifikethi zokuzalwa kwabantwana bakho kunye namakhadi okhuseleko lwentlalo. La maxwebhu aya kukunceda ukhusele izibonelelo onelungelo kuzo emva komtshato.
Hlaziya izinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka
Ukuhamba utshatile ungatshatanga kuyakufuna ukuba ujolise kwizinto ezinomdla kuwe. Eli lixesha lokuba ucinge ukuba ungubani kwaye ufuna ntoni, ngaphandle kwento ebekulindelwe ngumntu wonke kuwe kangangeminyaka emininzi.
"Abasetyhini abakhaliphileyo basebenzisa amandla abo emva komtshato ukuze bahlole ubomi babo, iinjongo zabo, iimpazamo zabo kunye nendlela abanokufunda ngayo kwixa elidlulileyo ... Bazichaza ngokutsha izinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka kwaye bafumanise ukuba zinantoni na kubo," utsho uAllison Patton weLemonade Divorce.
Lazi ixesha lokucela uncedo
Kungaba likratshi, okanye mhlawumbi sisidingo nje esikhulu sokuzibonakalisa kuwe nakwabanye ukuba ungayenza ngokwakho, kodwa uninzi lwabasetyhini abaqhawule umtshato bafumanisa ukuba ukucela uncedo yenye yezona zinto zinzima ukuzenza: “Ukusinda kuqhawulo-mtshato kunzima , kodwa, awunyanzelekanga ukuba uyenze wedwa. Ukugcina unxibelelwano phakathi kwabantu kunye nokwenza abahlobo abaluleke kubaluleke kakhulu kumabhinqa aqhawula umtshato emva kweminyaka engama-60, utshilo uMargaret Manning Sixtyandme.com.
Ukuba awufumani nkxaso kubahlobo nakusapho, fumana into oyithandayo ekuvumela ukuba udibane nabantu abatsha. Ukuba ungumntu osebenzayo, zama ukunyuka kwamatye, okanye omnye umsebenzi onomdla. Xa uzama into engaqhelekanga, uya kufunda isakhono esitsha, ukonyusa ukuzithemba. Oku kunokwenza ukuba inkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato ibe lula ukuyilawula.
Jonga kwakhona: 7 Izizathu eziqhelekileyo zokuqhawula umtshato
Cinga ngemithombo eyongezelelweyo yengeniso
Akukho mfihlo yokuba uqhawulo-mtshato luya kubeka uxinzelelo kwimali yakho. Ukongeza kukuhlala kuhlahlo-lwabiwo mali oluqatha, sukuyalela ukwenza into ukwenza eminye imijelo yengeniso. Oku kunokubandakanya ukuqala ishishini lakho, ukuthengisa izinto eziqokelelweyo ezindala, okanye ukukhetha umsebenzi osecaleni ngexesha lakho lokuzonwabisa.
Funda ukunandipha amaxesha akhethekileyo
Uhamba nesona seziganeko sibuhlungu kwaye ngamanye amaxesha esibuhlungu ebomini bakho. Fumana izinto ezikwenza wonwabe kwaye uzibandakanye ebomini bakho. U-Peg Streep uthi: kunye Psychology namhlanje.
Sukukunciphisa ukubaluleka kwamaqela enkxaso
Esinye sezona zixhobo zixabisekileyo onokuba nazo ngelixa uqhawula umtshato liqela apho ungabelana khona ngezinto ezikuxhalabisayo, uloyiko kunye nethemba. Iinkxalabo zabantu abatshatileyo abatshatileyo kwiminyaka yabo yama-60 zohluke kakhulu kunezabo bangaphantsi kubo. Kukho ixesha elincinci lokonga umhlala-phantsi kwaye imakethi yomsebenzi inokuba nzima kakhulu ukungena kuyo, ngakumbi ukuba uchithe iminyaka engama-40 edlulileyo ugcine ikhaya, imali yosapho kwaye ngequbuliso uzifumanele ukuzingela umsebenzi. Khangela iqela lenkxaso elikhethekileyo kuwe kunye nento onengxaki nayo, ukuze ufumane isibonelelo.
Unayo le!
Umbono wokuqalisa ngokutsha ngeli xesha ebomini bakho unokubonakala unzima. Khumbula, uyakuyenza, kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba kuya kuba lula njengoko uyifumana yonke. Yazi loo nto, yenza uxolo ngayo, kwaye usebenzise ezi ngcebiso ukuhlangabezana nazo njengoko uqhawula umtshato.
UNanda Davis
UNanda Davis ungumnini weNdlela yokuziQhelanisa noMthetho kaDavis kwaye abathengi bakhe bayaluxabisa uvelwano kunye nokuzinikela kuyo yonke inkqubo. Uyabanceda ukuba benze esona sigqibo sihle kubo nakusapho lwabo kwaye uhlala ekulungele ukuya kwiimvavanyo ukufikelela kwisiphumo esihle kubathengi bakhe. Ekuqaleni wayevela kumantla eVirginia, uNanda waphumelela i-magna cum laude kwi-George Mason University School of Law e-2012 kwaye waphumelela kwiDyunivesithi yaseVirginia ngo-2008. UNanda nguSekela Mongameli weSalem Roanoke County Bar Association, kunye noMongameli we Roanoke isahluko woMbutho wamaGqwetha amaKhosikazi waseVirginia.