Umxholo
- 1. Beka iiglasi zamaqabane ukuze baqonde indlela abalibona ngayo ihlabathi
- 2. Gcina imida esempilweni
- 3. Gxila kutshintsho lwakho
- 4. Yiba nenkqubo ebanzi yenkxaso
- 5. Bonisa uxabiso endaweni yokuzithathela ingqalelo
- 6. Yilwa ngobukrelekrele kwaye ulwe ngokufanelekileyo
- 7. Thetha kwangexesha
Ukwakha kunye nokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo kunokuthatha umsebenzi kwaye kube nzima. Ngombulelo, ubudlelwane bunokukhula kwaye bukhule okoko nje amaqabane omabini azimisele ukusebenza kuwo. Oku kuyinyani nokuba ukuqala kobudlelwane kwakunzima. Ngenxa yoko, ukuseta izinto kwasekuqaleni akunakoyiswa.
Ukuze ubudlelwane busebenze, omabini amaqabane kufuneka enze utyalomali oluqhubekayo ngokuhamba kwexesha ukugcina kunye nokuphucula ubudlelwane babo. Iimpendulo "zendlela yokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo" zinokwahluka kakhulu kwisibini esinye ukuya kwesinye. Akukho iresiphi yendalo iphela njengoko kungekho zibini zibini ezifanayo. Nangona kunjalo, ezinye iingcebiso zinokuba luncedo kuninzi lwamaqabane afunda ukugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo.
1. Beka iiglasi zamaqabane ukuze baqonde indlela abalibona ngayo ihlabathi
Impazamo ebulalayo esinokuthi siyenze, njengabantu, kukucinga endaweni yokujonga. Sicinga ukuba kungenxa yokuba sicinga ngesihloko esithile ngenye indlela enye siyibona ngokufanayo. Zama ukukhumbula ukuba kukangaphi usithi "Ndithathe umzekelo? Ngendenze ngenye indlela. ” Nangona oko kuyinyani, awunabudlelwane nawe kwaye omnye umntu onaye unenkqubo eyahlukileyo yokucinga kunye nembono zehlabathi. Izenzo zabo zivela kumbono wabo womcimbi kunye nobomi ngokwabo.
Ngokusekwe kumava ethu angaphambili nehlabathi kunye nabantu, silungisa uqikelelo lwethu ngokufanelekileyo. Umzekelo, ukuba besinemeko apho siye sangcatshwa, ngokunokwenzeka siya kuzama ukusebenzisa ulawulo ukunqanda ukwenzakala okufanayo. Ngaphandle kwamava anjalo, sinokuvuleleka ngakumbi kwabanye.
Iingcinga zethu ziqhuba isimilo sethu, kwaye ziyaphuhliswa ngokusekwe kubomi bethu ukuza kuthi ga ngoku. Ke ngoko, kukho ithuba elibalulekileyo lokuba iqabane lakho libone izinto ngendlela eyahlukileyo kunaleyo kuba amava abo obomi ahlukile.
Yiyo loo nto ingcebiso yokuqala kunye neyona iphambili kukuzama izihlangu zabo kubungakanani kwaye ujonge indlela evakalelwa ngayo.
Nokuba kunjalo, ukuqonda akuthethi ukuhambelana. Imalunga nokufumanisa ukuba kuthetha ntoni na kwiqabane lakho, ukungaziphathi ngendlela abebenokulindela ngayo kuthi okanye ukuba bazakwenza njani.
2. Gcina imida esempilweni
Abalingani kufuneka babe nakho ukuyekisa nokunyamezelana nezinye zezenzo abangazithandiyo kwenye. Nangona kunjalo, ezo ayifanelanga ukuba zezabo bazifumana zibalulekile ukuhlala kubudlelwane ngokubanzi. Ukongeza, banokulindela kuphela ukuba omnye alalanise kwezo zinto zingeyonxalenye yesazisi sawo, ngokuchaseneyo.
Ukutshintsha iqabane lakho likulingane nokulindeleyo kuya kwenza iqabane lakho lingonwabi kwaye ekugqibeleni nawe.
Kubaqalayo, awuyi kubahlonipha kuba besebenza njengodongwe ekuvumela ukuba ubakhe ngokutsha ngendlela onqwenela ngayo. Ulungelelwaniso luyimfuneko kubudlelwane bokusebenza, kodwa omabini amaqabane akufuneki anyamezele naziphi na izicelo zotshintsho lwesazisi.
3. Gxila kutshintsho lwakho
Umhlobo wam wakha wandixelela ukuba akahambelani nezicelo ezivela kwiintombi zakhe malunga nezinto abafuna ukuba azitshintshe. Ngamazwi akhe: "Ukuba ndenza njalo ndibangomnye umntu kwaye andisenguye lo mntu bathandana naye kwaye baya kundishiya." Nangona esenokuba ngqongqo ngokugqithisileyo, sinokuvuma ukuba wenza inqaku elinomdla.
Singatsho ukuba eyona nto ilungileyo kukufumana umntu ongadingi ukutshintsha ezona zinto zisenza sibe singabo, nangona inqanaba lolungelelwaniso luyimfuneko kulo lonke ubudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo, kufuneka silunge kulo naluphi na utshintsho esilwenzayo ngathi kwaye ezo akufuneki zibe ziimpawu ezisichazayo. Ngesi sizathu, indlela ekhuselekileyo ongayithatha kukugxila kuwe nakwinguqu yakho.
Nje ukuba utshintshe indlela oziphethe ngayo, iqabane lakho kuya kufuneka lilungelelanise nezalo. Ngale ndlela, ungalufezekisa utshintsho onqwenela ukulibona kwindlela oziphethe ngayo, kodwa ujolise kwinto onokuyilawula-zizenzo zakho.
Ngale ndlela uyakuphepha ukucela iqabane lakho ukuba lenze utshintsho olukhulu kwaye lijongise umzamo wakho kwinto onokuyiphucula ngokuqinisekileyo-indlela oziphethe ngayo.
4. Yiba nenkqubo ebanzi yenkxaso
Ngaba uya rhoqo kwiqabane lakho ukwanelisa iimfuno zakho zokuzonwabisa, ukonwaba, isondo, njl. Ngaba ngabo kuphela umntu owabelana naye nosizi, unxunguphalo kunye nolonwabo? Ukuba impendulo yakho ngu-"ewe", unokucinga ngokwandisa indawo ohlala kuyo.
Umntu omnye yedwa akanakho kwaye akufuneki abe ngumboneleli weemfuno zethu.
Nangona kunjalo, kukho ezinye iimfuno ekufuneka sizithembele kuphela kumaqabane ethu njengezesondo. Oku kuyinyani kuphela kulwalamano oluthile, nangona kunjalo, kwaye akuyi kubudlelwane obuvulekileyo apho amaqabane avumelana ngokuthandana nabantu abaninzi ngaxeshanye.
Kutheni le nto sifuna ukuba nesangqa esibanzi xa iqabane lethu libalaseleyo ekunikezeleni ngeemfuno zethu? Kufanele ukuba kubekho izihlobo ezinokubakho kuthi xa iqabane lethu lingakwazi. Akukho mntu unokubakho rhoqo kuthi. Banokuzama, kodwa ukuba abakwazi, kuya kufuneka ubhenele komnye umntu endaweni yokuzama ukuyinika iqabane lakho.
5. Bonisa uxabiso endaweni yokuzithathela ingqalelo
Masijongane nayo-akukho nto yenzelwe ukuba ihlale ngonaphakade kwaye yonke into ifuna ukugcinwa. Indlu engalawulwa iya kudilika emva kweminyaka ethile. Omnye unokuphikisa, indlu inokulungiswa ngokuqinisekileyo. Nangona oku kunokuba nokuchaneka, utyalo-mali olufunekayo kulungiso lungaphezulu kakhulu kunalolo lufunekayo kulondolozo lwesiqhelo. Ukungathethi ngokungahoywa kunokwenza ukuba wonakaliswe ngaphandle kokulungiswa. Singathi okufanayo kuya kubudlelwane.
Veza uxabiso kumlingane wakho rhoqo kangangoko unakho. Sithetha ngezenzo ezisondeleyo nezincinci ezinje ngesidlo sakusasa ebhedini, ukulungiselela isimanga sothando okanye ukuthenga ilekese abayithandayo. Yenze njengoko kwaye unako, kodwa kubalulekile ukuyenza rhoqo kangangoko unakho. Kwelinye icala, kuya kubakho amaxesha apho ukhathele kakhulu okanye uxinezelekile ukugxila kwelinye. Ngelixa oku kuyinto eqhelekileyo, loo maxesha akufuneki ahlale ixesha elide. Yintoni ethathelwa ingqalelo inde kakhulu? Oku kuxhomekeke kuwe, iqabane lakho kunye nonxibelelwano lwakho. Ukunxibelelana ukuba kukho into echitha amandla akho kunye nokugxila kude, kunokubanceda babe nomonde ngakumbi kwaye bakunike inkxaso efunekayo.
6. Yilwa ngobukrelekrele kwaye ulwe ngokufanelekileyo
Ukunyaniseka, kuya kubakho ukulwa. Akukho buhlobo buthanda koku. Ezinye ziya kuba ngaphezulu kwaye ezinye zibe yingozi kubudlelwane. Ukuba uyazivumela ukuba uthuke iqabane lakho kwaye uthethe ngomsindo, ngokuqinisekileyo ubeka emngciphekweni ubudlelwane. Oku kuya kubenzakalisa kwaye nangona ungafuna ukuwathatha loo magama kamva, ngekhe 'ube nakho.
Ngenye indlela, yilwa ngobukrelekrele ngokwenza "ikhefu lokulwa" xa uqaphela ukuba uza kuthetha into oya kuzisola ngayo.
Sebenzisa eli xesha ukubiza umhlobo wakho kwaye ukhuphe umoya ngaphambi kokuba ubuye uye kuthetha neqabane lakho. Esi sesinye sezizathu zokuba kufuneka ube nabanye abantu onokuthembela kubo abanokukuzolisa xa usilwa neqabane lakho.
Elinye icebiso elibalulekileyo ngendlela yokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo kukukhumbula - nguwe nobabini ngokuchasene nehlabathi, hayi omnye ngokuchasene nomnye.
Kubaluleke ngakumbi kunokuba ubudlelwane businda kunokuba omnye wenu abe ulungile.
7. Thetha kwangexesha
Xa unento ofuna ukuyithetha, kuya kufuneka ufumane ixesha kunye nendawo eyoneleyo yokuyithetha.
Ukuyinqwenela kude ngelixa uyiyeke yakheke ayisiyo sicwangciso esifanelekileyo.
Endaweni yokongeza uqhankqalazo, thetha kuba iqabane lakho lisenokungazi nokuba benza into engalunganga. Banokukulungela ukulalanisa kunye notshintsho ukuphucula imeko. Ukongeza, xa uthetha emva kweeveki okanye iinyanga, iqabane lakho liza kuziva lingaboni kakuhle kwaye mhlawumbi lingabinakho ukuzikhumbuza kwaye "lizikhusele". Ngokwenza oku ubalahla ithuba lokuchaza ukuba kutheni le nto isenzeka ngelixa isenzeka kwaye uyilungise ngaphambi kokuba uqale ucaphuke.