Umxholo
- Umlo uphelile
- Uloyiko oluncinci ngekamva
- Ukuqhawulwa komzimba
- Izinto azitshintshanga
- Ikamva lakho aliquki iqabane lakho
Kwakusekuseni kakhulu, ngaphambi kokuba umyeni wakhe avuke nasemsebenzini, wavuka uSandy wabulisa imini. Uye waphuma waya ekhitshini wayokwenza ikofu, wahlala wathula cwaka, wajonga efestileni. Zininzi izinto ezinokubonakala zifumaneka kuye ngalo mzuzu.
Emva koko, xa ebuyela kwigumbi lokulala eliphezulu kwaye edlula kumyeni wakhe oleleyo, waziva-engenanto. Kwiinyanga ezininzi ezininzi wayeziva enomsindo kunye nokudana ngenxa yayo yonke into eyenzekileyo phakathi kwabo. Balwa yonke into encinci. Akazange amfumane kwaphela, okanye azame. Akazange afune ukusebenza kubudlelwane babo okanye ade achithe ixesha kunye. Kwaye ubomi babo bobulili babungekho. Wayekhe wamthanda kwakanye, kodwa ngoku wayebonakala njengomntu owahlukileyo.
Ngaloo ntsasa waziva emangalisiwe kukuba umsindo wakhe wawuphele kwaphela, kwaye endaweni yawo wawuyinto engekhoyo. Kwakungelo xesha apho wayesazi ukuba ubomi bakhe buya phambili abuzukubandakanya umyeni wakhe. Igama "uqhawulo-mtshato" lwalungasoyiki uSandy. Yile ndlela wayesazi ngayo ukuba umtshato wakhe uphelile.
Ngelixa kuyinto eqhelekileyo emtshatweni ukuba namahla ndinyuka amaninzi, ukuba unezinto ezingaphezulu kunoko usenokuba nethuba lokulwa. Ithuba lokutshintsha kunye nokukhula kunye. Kunzima, kodwa kunokwenziwa ukuba nobabini ninomdla kwaye niyazimisela. Kuxa izinto ziqhubeka zidlulileyo apho-zidlulile kwinqanaba lokulwa-ukuba uqhawulo-mtshato alunakuphepheka. Uya kwazi ukuba umtshato wakho uphelile ukuba ufikelela kwezi zigqibo zilandelayo:
Umlo uphelile
Ukuba wena okanye iqabane lakho anizami kuwulwela umtshato kwakhona, kunokwenzeka ukuba usendleleni yokuphela. Ukuba kukho ithuba lokulwa lokuba kukho into eseleyo oza kuyigcina, nokuba wena okanye iqabane lakho niyakulila, nikhwaze, nincenge, nincenge, okanye nenze into enzima ukuzama ukuyigcina. Ungade ufake uqhawulo-mtshato ngeli xesha njengelinge lokugqibela lokuzama ukothusa omnye nomnye ukujika izinto-kusekho into enokugcinwa ukuba injalo. Kodwa xa kukho ukuzola okungaphezulu okanye okuncinci, umonde, ukungahoyi, ukungakhathali, kwaye ujonge phambili esiphelweni, isiphelo ngokuqinisekileyo sisemnyango.
Uloyiko oluncinci ngekamva
Xa kukho into enobudlelwane eshiyekileyo ukuyigcina, emva koko wena okanye iqabane lakho liza kuba nexhala kwaye loyike malunga nezinto ezinokwenzeka. Uya kuba nexhala leenkcukacha zokuba izinto ziya kuba njani. Uyikhathalele ngokupheleleyo kwaye ngokupheleleyo malunga nobudlelwane ukuba ukhathazeke malunga nemingcipheko oya kuyifumana ukuze wenze izinto zibengcono. Ukuba umtshato uphelile, nangona kunjalo, awunakukhathalela ukuba ikamva likuphatheleni; uyazi nje ukuba izakubangcono kunale meko ukuyo ngoku. Kwaye ulungile kuloo nto. Kwakhona, ukuba umtshato uphelile, uzimisele ukuhamba malunga nayo nayiphi na into ukuze ugqibezele.
Ukuqhawulwa komzimba
Xa ungadibananga njengesibini, kuyacaca ekuswelekeni kwebala. Awabelani ngesondo, awanga, awanga — ungahlali nokuhlala ecaleni komnye. Mhlawumbi unokuphepha ukuxubana. Umnqweno uhambile kwaye uziva ungonwabanga. Ukuba oku kuyenzeka, ungazama ukufuna ukusondelelana nomnye umntu kwenye indawo, kwaye ukuba awukhathali ngesiphumo sezenzo zakho kwinto enokwenzeka, umtshato uya kuthi ufikelele kwinqanaba lokuba kungabikho kubuya.
Izinto azitshintshanga
Xa amaqabane ekulungele ukutshintsha, umtshato awukagqitywa okwangoku. Kukho izinto zokuzama, iindlela ezintsha zokusondela, iindlela ezintsha zokwenza ubudlelwane bube ngcono. Kukho unyango lwezibini, ukurhoxa kwabantu abatshatileyo, ubusuku bokuhamba, iincoko ezininzi malunga nayo yonke into, njl.njl. Ukuba ayisebenzi ngaphandle kwawo wonke umzamo wakho, izinto azinakuze zitshintshe. Uya kwazi ukuba lixesha lokuba uqhubeke.
Ikamva lakho aliquki iqabane lakho
Xa sitshatile okokuqala, asinakucinga ubomi bethu ngaphandle kwamaqabane ethu; eneneni singazicingela siguga kunye. Kuzo zonke iimeko zobomi bethu bexesha elizayo, iqabane lethu liyinxalenye ebalulekileyo. Kodwa ukuba izinto kubudlelwane zichithakele ngokwaneleyo, loo mbono yexesha elizayo inokuthi itshintshe kakhulu. Ukuba ikamva lakho linethemba kunye namaphupha-njengokuhamba uhambo, ukubona abazukulwana, ukwenza izinto zokuzonwabisa kunye ― awusabandakanyi iqabane lakho, uqhawulo-mtshato lunokubakho kwikamva lakho. Engqondweni yakho, sele uthelekisa ukuba ubomi buza kuba njani ngaphandle kwabo, kwaye loo nto ibonisa ukuba umtshato wakho ungaphela.