Umxholo
- Ingozi yokungathembeki kumava akho ezesondo kunye neqabane lakho
- Uthando lodwa aluyi kwanela ukukugcina wonwabile nendoda
- Ayisiyonto yesondo kuphela, imalunga nonxibelelwano ngokunjalo
- Amadoda amaninzi akanalo nofifi lokuba angabanyamekela njani abantu ababhinqileyo ngokwesondo
- I-orgasms yenkohliso yokuvula indlela yokuphuphuma komsindo
- Yiba nelizwi ngakumbi ukunceda iqabane lakho ukuba libambelele kwinto ekufuneka eyenzile
Ukwabelana ngesondo ngokusempilweni, ubudlelwane obuphilileyo. Kunene? Kodwa kuthekani ukuba uzibona usemtshatweni okanye ukuzibophelela ixesha elide, kwaye ukuqhuba kwakho ngokwesondo kwahlukile kunokweqabane lakho? Okanye kuthiwani ukuba uthandana nomntu, ngubani ongakwaziyo ukuba angakukholisa njani ngokwesondo? Kule minyaka ingama-28 idlulileyo, umbhali othengisa kakhulu, umcebisi kunye nomqeqeshi wobomi uDavid Essel uncede izibini ukuba ziyifumane yonke le nto ngokudibana, isini kunye nonxibelelwano.
Ingozi yokungathembeki kumava akho ezesondo kunye neqabane lakho
Apha ngezantsi, uDavid uthetha ngeengozi zokunganyaniseki kumava ethu ezesondo kunye neqabane lethu. Nendlela yokulungisa ngayo. Kwiminyaka eliqela eyadlulayo kwafika umntu wasetyhini emsebenzini wam, eneentloni zokuthetha ngesihloko awayengakwazi nokuzisa nakwezontombi zakhe. Kuba wayedibene nomyeni wakhe kwiminyaka eli-10 eyadlulayo, wayefake yonke into awayeyifumana naye. Wayengonwabanga kwaphela malunga nesi sihloko, kwaye ke wasikhupha nje. Waba bomvu ebusweni, enentloni, ejonge phantsi, wakhetha iminwe yakhe, washukumisa iinyawo zakhe, akakwazi nokundijonga emva kokuba ethethile. Ndimqinisekisile ukuba nangona le isenokungabi yeyona meko intle, ukuba izigidi zabantu basetyhini zikwenzile oko ukusukela ekuqaleni kwexesha.
Wajonga phezulu, wandibuza, wathi, "Inene nguDavid? Andikaze ndibenazo naziphi na iintombi zam ezandixelelayo ukuba ziyazikhohlisa kwaphela. Ndivakalelwa ngathi ndim ndedwa umntu okhe wanayo. "Ndimkhokele, ukumqinisekisa, ukuba le yinto esele yenziwe ngabasetyhini abaninzi kwasekuqaleni, kwaye bendizenzile neevidiyo zika-YouTube kule nto." isihloko kakhulu. Wakhululeka. Kodwa ngoku wayezibuza, kufuneka enze ntoni ngayo?
Singene kwingxoxo yokuba yena nomyeni wakhe badibana njani, ukuba amava akhe okuqala ezesondo kunye naye ayenjani, kwaye kwakutheni ukuze athathe isigqibo sokuthula iminyaka eli-10.
Uthando lodwa aluyi kwanela ukukugcina wonwabile nendoda
Undixelele ukuba amava akhe okuqala ezesondo nomyeni wakhe abi kakhulu. Kwakunzima kakhulu. Wayengenguye umntu othembekileyo ebhedini ngelixa wayephumelele kakhulu kwikhondo lakhe lomsebenzi, wayengazithembi ngokwazi kwakhe ukuthetha ngesondo okanye ukuchitha ixesha elaneleyo ethetha naye ngesondo ukuqinisekisa ukuba wonwabile. Kwimeko yakhe exhomekeke kakhulu, wayengafuni ukusigungqa isikhephe. Wayecinga ukuba uthando luya kwanela ukumgcina onwabile nendoda ephumelele kakhulu, kwaye ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala kwakubonakala ngathi izinto zakhe zidibene.
Kodwa emva kweminyaka eyi-10 yokufaka yonke i-orgasm, wayekhe wanaye kwaye emva koko wanakekela iimfuno zakhe zomzimba kwishawari emva kokuba babelane ngesondo, wayengasakwazi ukuyiphatha. Wayefuna ukuphuma emtshatweni kodwa wayengazi ukuba uza kuzixhasa njani ngemali. Emva koko waziva enetyala kuba wayefuna ukubuphelisa ubudlelwane ngokungabikho konxibelelwano ngokwesondo.
Ayisiyonto yesondo kuphela, imalunga nonxibelelwano ngokunjalo
Njengoko siqhubeka nokuthetha malunga nobudlelwane bakhe bezesondo kunye nomyeni wakhe kwacaca ukuba ayisiyiyo kuphela indawo yobomi ababenengxaki yokunxibelelana. Abakwazanga ukuthetha ngezezimali ngendlela esempilweni. Abakwazanga ukuthetha ngezopolitiko ngendlela esempilweni. Abakwazanga ukuthetha ngendlela yokukhulisa abantwana babo ngendlela esempilweni. Kwaye apha, into yokwabelana ngesondo, babengenalo nofifi lokuba bangathetha njani ngesondo, okanye ukungabikho kolonwabo ngokwesondo, ngendlela esempilweni nokuba. Waqala ukubona ipateni. Kwakungekho nje ngesondo, kwakungokunxibelelana ngokunjalo.
Amadoda amaninzi akanalo nofifi lokuba angabanyamekela njani abantu ababhinqileyo ngokwesondo
Abasetyhini abaninzi benza impazamo yokucinga ukuba amadoda afanele azi ukuba angamkholisa njani umntu obhinqileyo, ukuba ayinguye owokuqala kubafazi kubomi bakhe bezesondo, ukuba indoda nganye mayazi ukuba ingakhathala njani ngeemfuno zesondo zowasetyhini.
Ngelixa amanye amadoda enesakhono sokungena ngokungathandabuzekiyo kwaye anyamekele iimfuno zamaqabane abo ngokwesini, uninzi lwamadoda alunalo nofifi lwayo. Makhe ndiyiphinde loo nto.
Amadoda amaninzi akanalo nofifi lokuba angabanyamekela njani abantu ababhinqileyo ngokwesondo. Kutheni kunjalo? Amadoda anexesha elinzima ngokwenene ekuthobekeni, ngakumbi kwimali nakwizesini. Ke ukuba abaqinisekanga ngendlela yokukholisa umfazi ebhedini banoloyiko lokwenene lokuba ngokumbuza ukuba uthanda ntoni, kumenza abukeke engaphantsi kwendoda.
Umthengi endibhala ngaye apha uneenkqubo ezifanayo zokukholelwa malunga namadoda. Wayedla ngokundixelela ephindaphinda “Andiyontombazana yokuqala ahlala nayo, bendilindele nje ukuba ayazi indlela yokundikhathalela mihla le“ nasemva kweminyaka yokubonisa ukuba akakwazi, okanye wayengenakunyamekela iimfuno zakhe zesondo, wayesaba ukuthetha. Wayexhomekeke ngokugqibeleleyo.
I-orgasms yenkohliso yokuvula indlela yokuphuphuma komsindo
Ndamxelela ukuba isizathu sokuba e-ofisini yam sesona sizathu sokuqala sokuba singaze sifeze ubugwenxa ebomini - inzondo iyakha kule minyaka idlulileyo, kwaye ngoku wayefuna ukuqhawula umtshato nomyeni wakhe, kuba wayengazange wayifumana indlela yokuvuleka , kunye nokunyaniseka kuye eyedwa, okanye ukumzisa kumcebisi ukuze bathethe kunye ngokungoneliseki kwakhe ngokwesondo.
Wonke umntu wasetyhini endikhe ndasebenza naye kule minyaka ingama-30 idlulileyo, ongonelisekanga ngokwesondo kwigumbi lokulala, uthetha into enye. Amadoda kufuneka ayazi into esiyifunayo. Amadoda kufuneka ayazi indlela yokwenza isondo ngomlomo kumfazi. Amadoda kufuneka akwazi ukufunda ingqondo yam ngokusisiseko kwaye aqonde ukuba iimfuno zam zinokwahluka kunelinye ibhinqa ebekade enalo ngaphambili. Ke ndiye ndaqala ukufundisa umthengi wam ukuba ulusebenzisa njani unxibelelwano olungasebenzisi magama kwigumbi lokulala ukuze aqondise isandla sakhe, umlomo, ulwimi kunye nokunye ukuze aneliseke.
Yiba nelizwi ngakumbi ukunceda iqabane lakho ukuba libambelele kwinto ekufuneka eyenzile
Waqala ukuthetha naye ngokungafihlisiyo emva kwengcebiso yam, kwaye wambuza imibuzo malunga nezinto azithandayo ezahlukileyo kwigumbi lokulala. Kwisithuba seenyanga ezintandathu, umtshato wagcinwa. Waqala ukunikela ingqalelo kwimpawu zakhe ezincinci ngezandla zakhe, ukugcuma kwakhe nangaphezulu kwaye waqala ukubambelela kwinto ekufuneka eyenzile ngokwahlukileyo naye kwigumbi lokulala.
Into ehlekisayo? Ngenxa yokunxibelelana ngokungathethiyo, ubomi babo ngokwesondo baphucuka ngokumangalisayo. Khange babenayo incoko yokuhlala phantsi apho amxelele khona "awundincedi ukufikelela kwi-orgasm, kwaye awunayo iminyaka eyi-10." Amadoda amaninzi esiva ukuba aza kuvala nangakumbi. Banokuba nomsindo. Yodwa. Irhoxisiwe.
Kodwa ngenxa yokuba elandela ingcebiso endimenzele yona, malunga nendlela yokuthetha ngaphandle kokuthetha, iimfuno zakhe zesondo ekugqibeleni zafezekiswa. Kwaye ubomi babo besini baphucuka ngokumangalisayo, kangangokuba buye busuka kube kanye kwiiveki ezimbini kuye kube kanye kwiintsuku ezi-3 ukuya kwezi-4.
Ukuba ungumfazi kunye nendoda engazalisekiswanga ngokwesondo liqabane lakho, funda inqaku elingentla kwakhona.
Kwaye ke, okona kubaluleke kakhulu, ngena kunye nomcebisi kunye okanye ugqirha wezesondo kwaye uqalise ukufunda ngeendlela ezahlukileyo esizifundisayo, ukuze ube nokuzaliseka kuyo yonke indawo yomtshato okanye ubudlelwane bakho. Ufanele. Yenza lo msebenzi ngoku. ”