Umxholo
- Icala elibi kunye necala elilungileyo
- Icala elimnyama lomphefumlo
- Yamkela isithunzi sakho
- Indlela yokwamkela icala lakho elimnyama
- Amagama okugqibela
Ngaba ukhe wayiphawula indlela umntwana wakho abonakala ngayo enobuntu obahlukeneyo obuvela ngamaxesha ahlukeneyo?
Sonke sinalo "icala elimnyama" - "amandla amnyama," okt, ukuguqula i-ego, isithunzi, i-subconscious- eyethu uMnu Hyde. Kwaye, ngamanye amaxesha sizama ukulawula umntwana wethu sisebenzisa okufanayo.
Isitshixo kukuqonda icala elilungileyo nelingalunganga kwaye wamkele icala lakho elimnyama.
Yile ndlela ekufuneka sizame ngayo ukuziphilisa. Ngokwamkela icala lakho elimnyama, uya kuba nakho ukunceda abantwana ngokunjalo.
Esi sesinye sezakhono ezibalulekileyo zokuba ngumzali ekufuneka sizibandakanye ukuze sikwazi ukuba ngumzali olungileyo.
Icala elibi kunye necala elilungileyo
Ukubonisa ubukho bendoda eyothusayo, qaphela umbulelo wakho, iKrisimesi, kunye nezigqibo zikaEva woNyaka oMtsha- "andizukuphinda ndizixakekise ngokutya ..."
Emva koko, njengokuba ixesha lisondela, ngokuthe chu, icala lethu elimnyama liyavela, "Isilayidi esinye nje sepayi a-la-mode ..". Emva koko, uzixelela ntoni?
“Ukhohlakele njalo-njalo, (yongeza igama lomyalezo wakho oza kuwukhetha apha) awusoze uphinde ulawule lomzimba kwakhona!”
Kwaye sizimisele ekubeni siqeqeshwe ngakumbi kwaye sithintelwe kwiziqu zethu. Ngaba ukhe walizama eli cebo nabantwana bakho? Ayisebenzi!
Ingxaki yile, le nxalenye yethu ihleka xa isohlwaywa. Usenokuba uqaphele ukuba abantwana bakho bayayilinganisa le nkalo.
Umsebenzi wecala lethu lesithunzi (kunye nabantwana bethu) kukuvukela kunye nokwaphula imithetho yokusigcina ekubeni singqongqo kwaye sihlukaniswe kwimbono enye.
Ngubani lo mphuli-mthetho ophuma kwelona xesha lingafanelekanga aze aphelise ezona zicwangciso zakho zibalaseleyo zokuba "ulunge"? Xa wawusemncinci umntu othile wathi kuwe, “Hayi, hayi! Akufanele! ”
Yazalwa njalo ke indawo yakho eyathi, “Ewe ewe, ndinako! Awunakundinqanda! ” Okukhona betyhalela indlela yabo kuwe, kokukhona uye wemba ngaphakathi.
Bukela le vidiyo ukuze uqonde ngcono oomatshini becala elimnyama. Ividiyo iya kukunceda ufumane ulwazi olunzulu lokuba ulamkele ngcono icala lakho elimnyama.
Icala elimnyama lomphefumlo
Sifaka amava ethu obuntwana, kwaye benza ukuba singobani ngoku. Sifaka ngokukodwa abazali bethu kunye nabasemagunyeni.
Abazali bakho bahlala ngaphakathi kweengqondo zakho kwaye unako Ndibaleke. Ngokuchaseneyo, ukuba utyhala indlela yakho emntwaneni wakho, womeleza ukuxhathisa kwakhe.
Okukhona sicinga ukuba inxenye yethu (okanye abantwana bethu) imbi, kokukhona basibaleka singazi. Kukho "indawo yobuzali" yakho ethi, "Siya kudla. Azisekho iilekese! ”
Ivuselela "inxalenye yomntwana" yakho ethi, "Ewe ewe, ndingakwazi, kwaye awunakundinqanda!" Sisandula ukudala umzabalazo wamandla ngaphakathi kwethu.
Kwenzeka ngokutya, iziyobisi, utywala, isondo, umsebenzi, ukuzilolonga- ungakutsho, singenza nantoni na ngokokude “kubi” kuthi.
Ithini impendulo kulo mzabalazo wamandla?
Yamkela isithunzi sakho
Okokuqala, cinga ukuba i-psyche yakho (kunye nomntwana wakho) ifana ne-pendulum. Sinecala lethu elibi kunye necala elilungileyo. Okukhona sizama ukwahlula isimilo sethu (okanye umntwana wethu) kwicala "elilungileyo", kokukhona i-pendulum yethu iya kujika kwelinye icala.
Yi-yin ne-yang, yamkela zombini ngenxa yokuba nganye iyasebenza kwaye iyimfuneko ukuze iphile. Ewe ewe, lamkela icala lakho elimnyama!
Ihlazo lendalo yonke lelokuba eyona nto siyithiyileyo kwabanye yeyona nto singayamkeliyo kuthi.
Ukuthula ukujija ukuze ufumane ukulungelelana ngakumbi ebomini, ngamanye amaxesha kufanelekile ukuvumela ezinye zezinto ozikhanyelayo. Yenza isivumelwano kunye nawe ukuba ube neqhekeza lephayi nakuphi na ubusuku emva kwesidlo sangokuhlwa.
Emva koko awuzukuya "kwihagu yasendle" (akukho pun ejoliswe kuyo) kwi-binge yokondla kuba awazi ukuba uyakuze uvumele nini ukuba uphinde ube nepayi.
Jonga isidingo esinzulu ngakumbi. Zibuze, “Yeyiphi imfuno engazalisekiswayo kolu lwalamano okanye kule meko? Ngaba ndikulungele ukuthi 'hayi' kule ndlela yokuziphatha, ngokwenza njalo ndenze okungakumbi ebomini bam ngento engcono? ”
Jonga nzulu kunendlela yokuziphatha echasayo yomntwana wakho. Yeyiphi imfuneko yokuba indlela abaziphethe ngayo ngokungafanelekanga izame ukuzalisekiswa?
Indlela yokwamkela icala lakho elimnyama
Qamba igama elithi "isiqu sakho esibi" ngegama elibekekileyo. Ukuziphatha kwethu okungalunganga kuyasiphazamisa ekuboneni ezona zinto ziphambili xa singakulungelanga ukuzijonga. Nika icala lakho elimnyama igama elihle laseIndiya njengeMvula yoMlilo, okanye igama lesiGrike elihle njengoHercules.
Qala ukucinga ngecala lakho elimnyama njengento ekukhuseleyo kwintlungu yakho. Lamkela icala lakho elimnyama njengenxalenye ebalulekileyo yakho enento oyithethayo.
Idabi lethu langaphakathi liyasiphazamisa kwimiba ephambili. Ukuba sihlala kumzabalazo womzimba, iziyobisi, ukusebenza nzima, imiba emibi yobudlelwane, ukungaphumeleli, kunye noloyiko lwempumelelo, akufuneki sijonge ingxaki enzulu.
Le micimbi ingundoqo ingaba nzima kakhulu, kwaye ngamnye kuni sele enoluvo olulungileyo lokuba yeyiphi eyenu.
Yiyo kanye into ongakuthandiyo ukucinga malunga nokwenzekileyo ebutsheni bakho, nokuba lithuba elinye okanye uphindaphinde ukuthanda umbulo okanye into ecekeceke njengomzali ongakholwayo ondumiso yakhe ongaze uyifumane, enokubangela usizi ngokweemvakalelo.
Ukuba ukulungele ukuqala ukujonga imvelaphi yemicimbi yakho ebuhlungu, licebo elilungileyo ukufuna isikhokelo sobuchwephesha njengoko oku kunokuba luloyiko oloyikisayo nolungaqhelekanga.
Nje ukuba uxabise, uthande, kwaye ulungelelanise icala lakho lesithunzi, alisayi kubaleka ungazi okanye uphume ngeendlela ezingalunganga. Awusayi kuphinda uzobe abantu ukuba bakubonise, njengabantwana bakho.
Ngokwendalo uya kubamkela ngakumbi abantwana bakho, ngaloo ndlela unciphise uninzi lomzabalazo wamandla. Yiba nemfesane kuwe xa uzibhaqa usenza isimilo "esibi".
Amagama okugqibela
Zinike uthando olungenamiqathango kwaye ungqinele ukuba ufunde kwiimpazamo zakho. Misela imida esengqiqweni malunga nento efanelekileyo yokukhathalela wena nabantwana bakho.
Musa ukuzibetha! Ke isithunzi sakho akufuneki sibuyele phantsi komhlaba kwaye silindele ithuba lokuphuma.
Iinkosi ezilumkileyo zithi ukuze siphelele, silungelelane, kwaye simanyane, kufuneka sizithande zonke iinkalo zethu, "ezilungileyo" nezimbi.
Okwangoku, yamkela icala lakho elimnyama. Ingase ucinezelo lubenani!