Umxholo
- Uhlobo lobuzali olusemthethweni
- Eminye imizekelo yendlela yokuba ngumzali onegunya
- 1. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo bahlala befuna kakhulu
- 2. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo abayondli inzala yabo
- 3. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo bohlwaya kungekho nkxaso ixhasayo
- 4. Abazali abanegunya banyanzelisa ukuthanda kwabo kwaye bathintela nelizwi lomntwana
- 5. Banomonde omncinci wokungaziphathi kakuhle
- 6. Abazali abanegunya ababathembi abantwana babo ukuba benze ukhetho olulungileyo
- 7. Abazali abanegunya basebenzisa iintloni ukugcina umntwana emgceni
- Isitayile esigunyazisiweyo sokugweba njengomzali
- Uhlobo lokuba ngumzali eligunyazisiweyo: inkcazo
- Eminye imizekelo yokuba ngumzali onegunya
Kubonakala ngathi zininzi iindlela zokuba ngumzali njengokuba kukho abazali.
Ukusuka engqongqo kakhulu, indlela yasemkhosini yokukhulisa abantwana, kwabakhululekileyo, yenza nantoni na oyifunayo esikolweni sokukhulisa abantwana nayo yonke into ephakathi ukuba ungumzali uyazi ukuba kukho akukho fomula yomlingo ngokukhulisa umntwana.
Kule nqaku, siza jonga iindlela ezimbini zokuba ngumzali: i Uhlobo lobuzali lobuzwilakhe kwaye i Isitayile esigunyazisiweyo somzali.
Uhlobo lobuzali olusemthethweni
Ngaba ujonge inkcazo yesitayile somzali?
Ukuba ngumzali ngokugunyazisiweyo sisitayile sokuba ngumzali esenziwe ngeemfuno eziphezulu kwicala labazali elidityaniswe nokuphendula okuphantsi kubantwana babo.
Abazali abanesimbo sobuzwilakhe banako kakhulu Ukulindela okukhulu kubantwana babo, kodwa ke unike okuncinci kakhulu kwindlela yokunika ingxelo kunye nokukhulisa kubo. Xa abantwana besenza iimpazamo, abazali bathanda ukohlwaya kabukhali kungekho ngcaciso ibancedayo, kwaye ibanika nesifundo. Xa ingxelo yenzeka, ihlala ingalunganga.
Ukukhwaza kunye nezohlwayo zomzimba nazo zihlala zibonwa kwisitayile sobuzali. Abaphetheyo bahlala bekhupha imiyalelo kwaye balindele ukuba ilandelwe ngaphandle kombuzo.
Babeka ipremiyamu kuthobelo kunye nokuqonda okungacacanga ukuba umzali wazi ngcono. Inkqubo ye- umntwana akufuneki abuze umbuzo nantoni na umzali uthi okanye enze kubo.
Eminye imizekelo yendlela yokuba ngumzali onegunya
Into yokuqala yokuyiqonda yile Isitayela somzali asinayo into efudumeleyo nenqabileyo.
Ngelixa abazali abangoozwilakhe bebathanda abantwana babo, baqinisekile ukuba olu hlobo lokuba ngumzali, olungqongqo, olubandayo, nolubeka umgama phakathi komzali nomntwana, lolona lusemgangathweni lomntwana.
Ihlala idluliswa kwisizukulwana esidlulileyo, ke ukuba umzali ukhuliswe ngokungqongqo, baya kuthi bamkele olu hlobo lunye xa bekhulisa umntwana wabo.
Nantsi imigibe esi-7 yokuba ngumzali onegunya
1. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo bahlala befuna kakhulu
Aba bazali baya kuba noluhlu lwemithetho kwaye baya kuyisebenzisa kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi bomntwana wabo. Abazichazi iingcinga ezisemva komgaqo, balindele nje ukuba umntwana awuthobele.
Ke ngekhe uve umzali onegunya esitsho into enje ngo: "Jonga iindlela zombini phambi kokuba uwele isitalato ukuze ujonge ukuqinisekisa ukuba akukho zimoto zizayo." Konke abaya kuthi kumntwana ajonge kuko kokubini ngaphambi kokuwela isitalato.
2. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo abayondli inzala yabo
Abazali abanolu hlobo babonakala bebanda, bekude, kwaye kunzima.
Imowudi yabo emiselweyo iyangxola kwaye iyangxama; kunqabile ukuba bakhuthaze ngokusebenzisa amabinzana okanye indumiso. Babeka ipremiyamu kuqeqesho ngamaxesha olonwabo kwaye babhalise kwilizwi elithi abantwana kufuneka babonwe nje kwaye bangaviwa.
Abantwana abadityaniswanga kusapho lonke olunamandla, Ukutyiswa rhoqo ngokwahlukeneyo kubantu abadala kuba ubukho babo etafileni buya kuphazamisa.
3. Abazali abagunyazisiweyo bohlwaya kungekho nkxaso ixhasayo
Abazali abanesi simbo baziva bethwa ngempama kunye nezinye iindlela zokohlwaya emzimbeni yindlela efanelekileyo yokufundisa umntwana.
Abafumanixabiso ekuchazeni ngokuzolileyo ukuba kutheni kukho iziphumo kwinto eyenziwa ngumntwana efuna ukohlwaywa; bona yiya ngqo ekubethweni, yiya kwigumbi lakho lendlela. Ngamanye amaxesha umntwana akazokwazi ukuba kutheni bohlwaywa, kwaye ukuba baceliwe, banokuba semngciphekweni wokubethwa kwakhona.
4. Abazali abanegunya banyanzelisa ukuthanda kwabo kwaye bathintela nelizwi lomntwana
Abaphetheyo benza imithetho kwaye banendlela ethi "indlela yam okanye umendo wendlela" kuqeqesho. Umntwana akanikwanga nasiphi na isithuba sokuxoxa okanye sokubuza.
5. Banomonde omncinci wokungaziphathi kakuhle
Abazali abagunyazisayo balindele ukuba abantwana babo bazi ngcono kunokuba baziphathe kakubi. Baswele umonde wokuchaza ukuba kutheni abantwana babo kufuneka baphephe iindlela ezithile zokuziphatha. Bona ungafundisi zifundo ngobomi okanye ukuqiqa emva kokuba kutheni ezinye iindlela zokuziphatha zingalunganga.
6. Abazali abanegunya ababathembi abantwana babo ukuba benze ukhetho olulungileyo
Kuba aba bazali bengabajongi abantwana njengezakhono zokwenza ukhetho olufanelekileyo, abaze banike abantwana inkululeko yokubonisa ukuba banokwenza into elungileyo.
7. Abazali abanegunya basebenzisa iintloni ukugcina umntwana emgceni
Olu luhlobo lwabazali abathi emntwaneni oyindoda “Musa ukulila. Wenza ngathi uyintombazana encinci. ” Basebenzisa ngokungafanelekanga ihlazo njengesixhobo esikhuthazayo: “Awufuni ukuba sesona sidenge esikolweni, yiya egumbini lakho wenze umsebenzi wesikolo.”
Isitayile esigunyazisiweyo sokugweba njengomzali
Kukho esinye isitayile sobuzali ogama lakhe livakala lifana nelawulo, kodwa lolona hlobo lusempilweni lwendlela yokuba ngumzali:
onegunya. Makhe sijonge kule ndlela yokuba ngumzali.
Uhlobo lokuba ngumzali eligunyazisiweyo: inkcazo
Ukuba ngumzali ogunyazisiweyo kubeka iimfuno ezifanelekileyo ebantwaneni nasekuphenduleni okuphezulu kwicala labazali.
Abazali abanegunya babambe ulindelo oluphezulu ebantwaneni babo, kodwa bakwabanika iziseko ezisisiseko kunye nenkxaso yeemvakalelo abayifunayo ukuze baphumelele. Abazali ababonisa esi sitayile bayabamamela abantwana babo kwaye bababonelele ngothando kunye nobushushu ukongeza kwimida kunye noqeqesho olufanelekileyo nolululo.
Eminye imizekelo yokuba ngumzali onegunya
- Abazali abanegunya bavumela abantwana babo ukuba bazivakalise, izimvo zabo kunye nezimvo zabo, kwaye babamamele abantwana babo.
- Bakhuthaza abantwana babo ukuba bavavanye kwaye bahlolisise iindlela ezahlukeneyo abanokukhetha kuzo.
- Bakuxabisile ukuzimela komntwana kunye nezakhono zokuqiqa.
- Babelana nomntwana inkcazo yabo yemida, iziphumo, kunye nolindelo njengoko ezi zinxulumene nokuziphatha komntwana.
- Zikhupha ubushushu nokukhulisa.
- Balandela uqeqesho olunobulungisa nolungaguquguqukiyo xa kwaphulwa imithetho.