Umlingane Wakho Ukhohlisiwe Kuwe: Ngaba Uyahlala?

Umbhali: Peter Berry
Umhla Wokudalwa: 19 Eyekhala 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 1 Eyekhala 2024
Anonim
Umlingane Wakho Ukhohlisiwe Kuwe: Ngaba Uyahlala? - I-Psychology
Umlingane Wakho Ukhohlisiwe Kuwe: Ngaba Uyahlala? - I-Psychology

Umxholo

Imicimbi kubudlelwane yenzeka mihla le. Yenye yeendawo eziguqukayo kubudlelwane nakwimitshato yabantu abaninzi, indawo yokujika enokuthi iphelise ubudlelwane. Ke, ukuba usebudlelwaneni kwaye umcimbi uyenzeka, wenzani?

Nazi ezinye iingcebiso zokukunceda uthathe isigqibo malunga nento oza kuyenza kubudlelwane bakho, ukuba kwenzeka umcimbi.

Phantse wonke umntu endakha ndadibana naye uthe xa bengena kubudlelwane, ukuba abanakuze banyamezele ukukopela. Abasoze bahlale nomntu ophambukayo kulwalamano.

Nangona kunjalo inyanga nenyanga eofisini yam, ndisebenza nabathengi abavela kwihlabathi liphela abaye bazifumana bekwimeko kwaye abaqinisekanga ukuba mabenze ntoni.

Masijongane nayo, akukho mntu uya kubudlelwane obulungiselelwe umntu athandana naye. Andizange ndadibana nomntu oweza kum wacela isikhokelo malunga nokuba enze ntoni xa kunokwenzeka ukuba uhlala nomntu obakhohlisayo. Akubonakali ngathi kusengqiqweni.


Nangona ulapha. Umlingane wakho uqhathe nje. Okanye mhlawumbi baqhathe amaxesha amaninzi. Okanye mhlawumbi bebethandana nomntu omnye kangangeenyanga okanye iminyaka.

Ingaba wenza ntoni? Makhe sijonge.

1. Ngaba ukulungele ukudlulela phambili?

Ukusuka kumbono wokuba ngumntu okhohlisiweyo, into yokuqala endiyicelayo kubo bobabini abantu ngaba bakulungele ukwenza umsebenzi oyimfuneko wokuphilisa ubudlelwane.

Lo asingombuzo ulula ukuwuphendula. Abanye bazokuthi hayi, ndingene apha ukuze ndilahle yena kuba andinakuma ukuba kunye nomntu okopelayo. Soze ndiphinde ndimthembe.

Ngokucacileyo, loo mntu akanamdla wokwenza umsebenzi, ke kubo, eyona mpendulo ilungileyo kukuphelisa ubudlelwane.

Kodwa kwelinye icala, ukuba umntu uthi kum ewe bafuna ukwenza umsebenzi, kwaye ewe bafuna ukubuphilisa ubudlelwane, emva koko sigqibe ekubeni, ngaloo mini, sifike emsebenzini.

2. Ngaba ukulungele ukulwela ubudlelwane?

Ukuba ufunde oku kude, ungomnye wabo bantu banokuthi bakulungele ukulwela ubudlelwane bakho kunye neqabane lakho. Kodwa ngoku kuya kuba nzima. Ngaba liqabane lakho, ucinga ukuba ngabo abo bakopayo, bazimisele ukwenza umsebenzi nabo?


Ke, kule meko, ndiza kucela umntu okreqileyo, ukuba bazimisele ukusebenza ngebhatyi yabo kwiinyanga ezili-12 ezizayo ukuze baphinde bamthembe umntu abamqhathe.

Ukuba impendulo nguewe, baya kuba kwisihogo esinye sokukhwela, kodwa kunokuba kufanelekile. Ukuba impendulo nguhayi, ndicebisa njengomcebisi ukuba ubudlelwane okanye umtshato uchithwe. Akukho ndlela esihogweni ndiza kusebenza nesibini esitshatileyo apho umntu okwenyani engathandanga ukufaka iinyanga ezili-12 zomsebenzi ukuze aphilise kwaye aphinde athembeke kumaqabane abo.

3. Ngaba iqabane lakho likulungele ukusebenza ukuseka ukuthembana kubudlelwane

Ukuba ufumene oku, oko kuthetha ukuba omabini amaqela azimisele ukwenza umsebenzi.

Okomntu okopileyo: kufuneka bazimisele ukwenza nantoni na iqabane labo eliyicelayo ngaphakathi kwesizathu, ukuze baphinde bathembeke.

Ithetha ukuthini le nto kwizibini ezininzi endikhe ndasebenza nazo ngulo uqhathiweyo kufuneka akulungele ukuluphelisa ngokupheleleyo naluphi na ulwalamano kunye nomntu abakhohlise naye.


Azikho iimpendulo ezingenamsebenzi ezinje ngokuba "andinakubaxelela ukuba asizukuphinda sinxibelelane namhlanje kuba ingomso lusuku lwakhe lokuzalwa. Okanye, uyazi ukuba banabantwana babo kule mpelaveki ngoko ke kuzakufuneka ndilinde de kube yiveki ezayo ukuze ndive iindaba. ”

Ukuba umntu okreqileyo ufuna ukubuyela kubudlelwane, baya kwenza yonke into abacelwe ukuba bayenze. Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo. Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo. Le kuphela kwendlela amaqabane abo aya kwazi ngayo ukuba bazimisele ngokupheleleyo ngokwenza ulungiso kunye nokuphilisa ubudlelwane. Ke kuye umntu ongakhange akope, ukubeka umthetho malunga nezinto ekufuneka bezenzile ukuze bakwazi ukuthembela kwiqabane labo kwakhona.

Ngamanye amaxesha, umntu ongakhange akope uya kubuza iqabane lakhe ukuba libathumele imiyalezo ngeyure nganye ngeyure kunye nomfanekiso ongasemva wokuba bakuphi.

Ekubuyeleni ngempumelelo kothando, oku akufuneki kujongwe njengokuhlekisa. Umntu ongakhange akhohlise kufuneka abuze iqabane lakhe ukuba lenze malunga nayo nayiphi na into, ngaphakathi kwesizathu, ukuze aqale ukuziva ukuba iqabane lakhe liya kuthembeka phantsi kwendlela.

Thatha uxanduva lwezinto ezinokubangela ukuba iqabane lakho libhadule

Umsebenzi wokugqibela endiwunika umthengi ongakhange akhohlise ubabuza ukuba yeyiphi indima yabo kwiqabane labo. Ngaba bavala ebhedini? Ngaba baqale ukuchitha ixesha elininzi emsebenzini kuba bezele ingqumbo kulwalamano lwabo? Andisayi kusebenza nesibini nakweyiphi na ubudlelwane, apho bekukho umcimbi, apho ubudlelwane buqinile. Ayize yomelele. Kungenxa yoko le nto umntu ethandana nomntu kwasekuqaleni.

Ke lo msebenzi wokugqibela umalunga nokwenza umntu ongakhange aphambuke, avume kwimpazamo yabo kuqhawulo-mtshato. Okanye ukungasebenzi kolwalamano. Kwaye ngoku lo mntu kufuneka aqale ukusebenza kwiinzondo zabo, izizathu zokuba baqale ukuhlala emva kwexesha emsebenzini, baqala ukusela ngakumbi okanye bavala kwigumbi lokulala. Le yinxalenye ebalulekileyo yokuphilisa kubo bobabini abantu.

Kwababini abalandela le ngcebiso ingasentla, unokuphinda ubuye uthando emva komtshato. Kodwa ukuba kukho ukuthandabuza nokuba kukweliphi icala, kungangcono ukubuphelisa kancinci kancinci ubudlelwane, nokuba bakho abantwana, kuba ukuba kubudlelwane apho ukuthembana kungakhiwanga kwakhona, ingqumbo ayekwalelwa, iya kukhokelela esihogweni umhlaba phantsi kwendlela.