Umxholo
- 1. Ababini babonisa ngokucacileyo iimvakalelo zabo omnye komnye
- 2. Amaqabane axhasana ngokukhula komntu ngamnye
- 3. Amaqabane ahlala eqhagamshela kwaye efumana kwakhona omnye nomnye
- 4. Basebenza emtshatweni wabo kwaye bathanda lonke ixesha
Ungahlala uxelela xa isibini sikubudlelwane obuzinzileyo. Xa ubajonga kunye okanye bohlukene, bobabini babonakala benelisekile, bekhululekile, bekhululekile kwaye bonwabile. Ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo benza amaqabane omabini aphumelele njengabantu, kwaye onwabele ixesha labo kunye njengesibini. Ke, uyabona xa uphakathi kwabantu abanethamsanqa lokuba kulwalamano olunjalo.
Nangona kunjalo, ayisiyonto enikwa kuphela abambalwa abanethamsanqa; Sonke sinokusebenza kubudlelwane bethu kwaye sibuguqule bube yimpumelelo nenkuthazo ebomini bethu.
Izifundo zibonise ukuba lonke ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo nobusempilweni babelana ngeempawu ezibalulekileyo:
1. Ababini babonisa ngokucacileyo iimvakalelo zabo omnye komnye
Oku akuthethi uthando kunye nothando kuphela kodwa umsindo kunye nokudakumba ngokunjalo. Ulwalamano oluzinzileyo alubonakalwanga ngokungabikho kokungavumelani okanye ukungoneliseki kwezinye iimeko.
Nokuba abantu abonwabileyo bangabantu kwaye banamava amabi njengathi sonke. Kodwa, ngokungafaniyo kubudlelwane obungenampilo, amaqabane kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo anendlela eqinisekileyo yokuthetha ngeemvakalelo zabo, bonke. Oko kuthetha ukuba abazukurhoxa, abayeki ukuba ndlongondlongo, okanye babe ndlongondlongo kuloo nto, kwaye musa ukuzicinezela iimvakalelo zabo.
Bavakalisa ukungoneliseki kwabo ngokucacileyo kodwa ngentlonipho nangothando, kwaye basebenza kwimicimbi njengesibini (hayi njengamaqabane omdlalo wamanqindi njengoko kuqhele ukwenzeka kubudlelwane obuyityhefu). Kwaye le yinto isebenza ngazo zombini ezi ndlela-ayisiyiyo kuphela into yokuba ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo bukhuthaze ukubonakaliswa okusempilweni koluhlu lonke lweemvakalelo, kodwa nokuba uyaqala ukunxibelelana neemfuno zakho kunye neembono zakho ngendlela eqinisekileyo, ubudlelwane bunokujika bube ngcono .
2. Amaqabane axhasana ngokukhula komntu ngamnye
Ukuba ucinga ngomntu omthathela ingqalelo kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo nobusempilweni, usenokuba nemvakalelo yokuba phambi komntu ozalisekisiweyo, umntu ongeyonxalenye nje yesibini kodwa okwaziyo ukuziphumeza . Kungenxa yokuba, ngokungafaniyo kubudlelwane obungenampilo, amaqabane kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo azive ezithembile kwaye ekhuselekile.
Ngenxa yoko, abaziva bengakhuselekanga xa iqabane labo lizama izinto ezintsha, ukuqhubela phambili nomsebenzi wabo, okanye ukufunda umdlalo omtsha. Xa amaqabane engakhuselekanga malunga nokuzinikela kwamaqabane abo, bachitha onke amandla abo kunye nemvula ngokwabo kwimizamo yokugcina iqabane lisondele kangangoko. Kwaye iqabane labo nalo alinakuphumelela kwimeko enjalo engaxhasiyo kwaye ihlala iphelisa umntu ongaphantsi.
Kodwa xa amaqabane ezithembile, bahlala bexhasa kakhulu kwaye benomdla ngenzondelelo malunga nokukhula kothandekayo wabo, kwaye bezimisele ukwabelana ngamava abo amatsha-akhokelela kulwabiwo olulandelayo lolwalamano kubo bonke ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo.
3. Amaqabane ahlala eqhagamshela kwaye efumana kwakhona omnye nomnye
Kwaye oku, ngokuyinxenye, kwenziwa ngokuthetha ngenkanuko yomntu, umdla, kunye nezakhono namava amatsha afundwayo. Ngokwabelana ngehlabathi labo langaphakathi kunye neqabane labo, nangokuthetha ngendlela abalichitha ngayo usuku lwabo (ngokweenkcukacha, hayi nje "Ewe, kwakulungile"), abo bakubudlelwane obuzinzileyo bahlala bephinda befumanisana.
Kwaye, xa omnye etshintsha, njengoko inokwenzeka ngokuqinisekileyo ngexesha, elinye iqabane alishiywanga ngaphandle, kodwa lalikhona kwinkqubo kwaye lafumana ithuba lokuziqhelanisa. Enye indlela yokuqhagamshela kwakhona yonke imihla kukuchukumisana ngendlela engeyiyo eyokwabelana ngesondo, nto leyo ke eyenziwa ngabantu abatshatileyo kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo ngalo lonke ixesha. Oku kuthetha ukuwola, ukubambana ngezandla, kunye nokuchukumisa okucacileyo nokusondela apha naphaya.
Into enomdla kukuba, ngaphandle kokuba neentlobano zesini, ezinokuthi zityhalelwe ecaleni okanye zihlale zizezona zibalulekileyo kubudlelwane obungazinzanga, phantse kungumthetho wokuba ukuba ubudlelwane buyaphambuka, le miqondiso yothando iphantse yaphela.
4. Basebenza emtshatweni wabo kwaye bathanda lonke ixesha
Isenokuvakala buthuntu kwabo baqhele ulwalamano olungenakulindeleka kunye nolunomdla, kodwa oku luphawu lokuba omabini amaqabane avuthwe ngokwasemoyeni ngokwaneleyo ukuba akhule ngokuncamiseka kwenene nokuba sempilweni. Ke, kukhangeleka njani ukusebenza kubudlelwane?
Isebenzisa konke oku kungentla, kwaye ivulekile, inika isiqinisekiso kwiqabane lakho malunga nolwalamano lwakho, usebenzisa ubomi bakho ekuhlaleni ukubonelela ngenkxaso eyongezelelweyo kubudlelwane, kunye nokubona ukuzibophelela njengento elungileyo apho uxanduva oluza nayo luyinto ukwamkelwa ngovuyo.
Ukuba kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo ayisiyonto yenzeka nje (okanye ayenzeki). Kuthatha umzamo ukufunda ukukhula njengenxalenye yesibini, kodwa xa ulungile, lelona liva linomvuzo, mhlawumbi ebomini.