Umxholo
- 1. Yintoni ikhwele lesini?
- 2. Ngaba sonke sinomona wesini?
- 3. Iziphumo zomona wesini ogqithileyo
- 4. Ungawoyisa njani umona wesini
Sonke siyazi ukuba yintoni umona nokuba ungabonakalisa njani ubudlelwane. Siyazi nokuba umona ungamtshintsha umntu kanobom kwaye ukuba uyekwe ungalawuleki kunokubangela i-paranoia kunye noxinzelelo. Kwelinye icala, ngenani elifanelekileyo lomona linokusenza sizive sibalulekile kwaye sinokunceda ubudlelwane ukuba bomelele.
Nangona kunjalo ngaphambi kokuba sinyathele kumbono wokusebenzisa umona kubudlelwane bethu kufuneka sijongane nemibuzo embalwa- Uqhelene kangakanani nexesha lekhwele lezesondo? Ngaba sonke siziva ngokufanayo malunga nendlela umona osebenza ngayo? kwaye siqinisekisa njani ukuba siya kuba nakho ukuyiphatha ngokufanelekileyo?
1. Yintoni ikhwele lesini?
Yintoni umona ngokwesondo kuthi kwaye udlala indima njani kubudlelwane bethu?
Ngokwenkcazo, umona wesini luhlobo lomona ngokwemiba yezesondo. Ikhwele lezesondo lisadibene nebhayoloji yethu. Nditsho nasendle, indoda eyindoda iya kwenza konke okusemandleni ayo ukuqinisekisa ukuba iqabane layo lelayo-lodwa. Siza kuba nakho ukubona kunye nokubonela ubundlongondlongo kuyo nayiphi na indoda evakalelwa kukuba isoyikisiwe ngakumbi kwiqabane layo lokudibana nenye indoda.
Kuyafana nakuthi bantu. Ukuba usebudlelwaneni, ngokuqinisekileyo kufuneka ulinde ukuba iqabane lakho liza kwenza ukungathembeki. Ikhwele lezesondo kumaqabane ethu sonke liqhelekile kodwa linokonakalisa xa liphuma esandleni.
Ngaba uyazi ukuba amadoda afumana umona wesini ngakumbi kunabafazi? Isizathu soku kukuba i-biology yamadoda kukuvelisa abantwana kwaye kufuneka alondoloze iqabane lakhe kwamanye amaqabane anokubakho. Amadoda aya kuhlala eziva enomona ngokwesini kwamanye amadoda ngakumbi xa eziva esongelwa.
2. Ngaba sonke sinomona wesini?
Amadoda nabasetyhini bobabini banomona. Nangona kunjalo umona wesini emadodeni ulungele ukuba ngaphezulu kunabafazi. Ikhwele lesini kwabasetyhini kunokwenzeka ukuba likhokelele kwikhwele ngokweemvakalelo kunokuba.
Indoda iya kuqinisekisa ukuba iqabane layo lihlala lithembekile kwaye linyanisekile kuye. Unokuba neendlela ezahlukeneyo zokubonisa ukuba uba nomona njani kodwa uya kuhlala ekhona. Umfazi kwelinye icala uziva amandla afanayo omona kodwa kwinqanaba leemvakalelo.
Nangona, imvakalelo yeemvakalelo kunye nezesondo zahlukile, iintlungu zentliziyo evela ekukhohliseni zivakalelwa kwaye zijongeka ngokufanayo kuba ikhwele leemvakalelo kunye nezesondo lixhumene.
Njengomfazi ukuba ubona iqabane lakho lidlala ngothando okanye libandakanyeka kwisenzo sesondo nelinye ibhinqa, intlungu oya kuyiva kukuba ubabone besenza into ekungafanelekanga ukuba bayayenza kuba yeyakho. Oku kuya kwenzakalisa iimvakalelo zakho kwaye kungakhokelela kumona weemvakalelo.
Kwelinye icala, indoda ebona iqabane layo lincwasa okanye libandakanyeka ngesondo nenye indoda iya kubangela umona ngokwesini emadodeni.
3. Iziphumo zomona wesini ogqithileyo
Sonke siyaqonda ukuba umona ungabonakalisa njani ubudlelwane. Nokuba nithandana kangakanani, umona omninzi uya kubulala ukuthembana, uthando kunye nentlonipho eninayo omnye komnye.
Ukuba nekhwele ngokwesondo okanye ngokweemvakalelo kunokulonakalisa ulwalamano lwakho ngezi ndlela zilandelayo:
- Ikhwele elininzi ngokukodwa umona wesini ungenza naluphi na ulwalamano lube yityhefu. Akukho xesha, endaweni yokuba wonwabe ungaziva utyhafile xa ukunye neqabane lakho.
- Ukuba uziva ukuba ngalo lonke ixesha nikunye, kuya kufuneka ujongane nezityholo ezingenasiseko, emva koko oko kunokubangela ukuba ubudlelwane bakho buhlukane.
- Inokubangela iqabane lakho lithethe ubuxoki ukuphepha ungquzulwano olungeyomfuneko.
- Inokwenza nabani na ukuba aphulukane nokuzithemba kwabo, uthando kunye nentlonipho kumaqabane abo.
- Umona ogqithisileyo wesini uya kuthi ungene kwezinye iingxaki ezinje ngezityholo, intiyo, kunye neparanoia.
Akukho mntu ufuna ukuba kubudlelwane apho utyholwa ngokudlala ngothando namanye amadoda-oku kungakhokelela ekutshatyalalisweni komtshato wakho okanye ubudlelwane.
4. Ungawoyisa njani umona wesini
Ukuba usebudlelwaneni apho uyazi ukuba iqabane lakho okanye iqabane lakho linengxaki yomona ogqithileyo ngokwesondo, mhlawumbi lixesha lokuba ucinge ngendlela yokujongana nomona wesondo ngaphambi kokuba uphume esandleni.
Ungalinceda njani iqabane lakho ukoyisa umona wesini kwaye ungawandisa njani umonde wakho? Nazi iingcebiso ezimbalwa malunga nendlela yokufumana umona ngesondo:
- Mxelele ukuba uyamthanda kwaye ukuba uyafuneka, mnike isiqinisekiso sokuba uyakudinga kuwe. Ngamanye amaxesha, oku kunokuwuthomalalisa umona wakhe wesini.
- Kuphephe naziphi na iimeko apho ucinga ukuba iqabane lakho okanye iqabane lakho liya kuba nomona. Ukuba unomhlobo ongumfana oqhubeka ekufowunela okanye angabinaso isibindi sokukugona emva koko kuya kufuneka uqonde ukuba oko kungalichaphazela njani iqabane lakho.
- Ukuba amaqabane akho omona ngesondo uya esiba ngaphezulu, unokufuna uncedo lweengcali. Oku akuthethi ukuba wena okanye iqabane lakho uneengxaki zengqondo okanye zengqondo. Ngapha koko, le yindlela entle yokujongana nomcimbi ngaphambi kokuba uphume esandleni.
- Ukuba iqabane lakho libonisa umona omkhulu wesini ngenxa yobudlelwane bakhe bangaphambili, mhlawumbi ungolula kancinci umonde wakho ade afunde ukoyisa umona wabo wesini. Ngale ndlela, unokukhululeka kwintlungu ayinike ulwalamano lwakhe lwangaphambili.
- Visisanani kwakhona ukuthembana nothando omnye komnye. Ngamanye amaxesha, ngobomi bethu obuxakekileyo, sihlala sihamba ngokwahlukeneyo nto leyo ebangela ukuba sikhathazeke ngamaqabane ethu. Unxibelelwano lunokunceda kakhulu izibini ekusombululeni le ngxaki.
Sonke siyakwazi ukuziva sikhwele ngokwesondo kwaye enyanisweni, uninzi lwezizathu zethu ziya kuqondakala ngokugqibeleleyo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba sifuna ukuqiniseka ukuba sinobudlelwane obusempilweni, kuya kufuneka sazi ukuba singoyisa njani ikhwele lesini ngokwethu ngaphambi kokuba liphume esandleni.
Khumbula ukuba umona omncinci kubudlelwane unokubuqinisa kodwa ukuba ugqitha kuwo, umona ungaluchitha ulwalamano lwakho.