Umxholo
- Cacisa gca nge ex yakho
- Chitha ixesha nawe kuqala
- Buza ukuba ukulungele na ukuya phambili
- Thatha amanyathelo asebenzayo okuqhawula umtshato
- Lumkela isaphulelo
- Nyaniseka kwasekuqaleni
Ukuthandana ngelixa uhlukene, kodwa ungaqhawulanga mtshato sisihloko esikhohlisayo. Kwelinye icala, kuyindalo ukufuna ukufumana iqabane kwaye uhambe emtshatweni wakho. Kwelinye icala, usatshatile ngokusemthethweni kwaye amanye amaqhina asekhona.
Ezinye iingcali zobudlelwane ziya kuthetha ngokuchasene nokuthandana ngexesha lokwahlukana, kodwa ungaqhawuli mtshato. Ngelixa kuyinyani ukuba kuya kufuneka ukhumbule iimfuno zakho kunye nezizathu zakho, ukuthandana ngelixa uhlukene phakathi akunakwenzeka.
Landela ezi ngcebiso zokukunceda ufumanise ukuba ukulungele na ukuthandana ngelixa wohlukene, okanye ukuthandana nomntu owahlulweyo kodwa akaqhawulanga mtshato kunye nendlela yokufumana okuninzi ngokuthandana ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuthabathela kuwo.
Cacisa gca nge ex yakho
Ngaphambi kokuba ucinge ukubuyela kumdlalo wokuthandana, uya kudinga ezinye iintetho ezinyanisekileyo kunye ne-ex yakho. Nilindele ntoni nina nobabini ngokwahlukana? Ukuba i-ex yakho inethemba loxolelwaniso, abayithandi into yokuba ubone umntu omtsha kunye nokuthandana ngelixa wahlukene.
Kodwa, ngaba ungathandana ngelixa uhlukene?
Awungekhe uthandane de niqiniseke ukuba iphelile kwaye awunamnqweno uyimfihlo wokubuyela kunye. Usenokungafuni ukuthetha ne-ex yakho malunga nezicwangciso zakho zangoku zokuthandana, kodwa ukuba awukaqhawuli mtshato okwangoku, ayisiyiyo eyona nto inyanisekileyo ukuyenza.
Ukuba i-ex yakho inethemba loxolelwaniso kwaye awuyifuni, cacisa kakhulu malunga nabo. Kuya kubuhlungu, ukuqala, kodwa kungcono kuni nobabini ekuhambeni kwexesha.
Chitha ixesha nawe kuqala
Ngaba kulungile ukuthandana ngelixa wohlukene?
Ukuphuma emtshatweni kuyadinisa ngokweemvakalelo. Ujongene noluhlu lweemvakalelo, ungasathethi ke ngokusebenziseka kokuhlala ngaphandle kweqabane lakho okokuqala kwiminyaka.
Ukuthandana uhlukene phakathi ayonto imbi ncam. Kodwa, sukungxamela ukuthandana. Chitha ixesha nawe kuqala. Udinga ixesha kunye nendawo yokuthandana nawe kwakhona kuqala. Gcina ixesha elincinci lokuthambisa okanye ngekhefu leempelaveki apha naphaya ukuze uzinike ixesha lokuphola.
Buza ukuba ukulungele na ukuya phambili
Zibuze ukuba ngaba ukulungele ngokwenene ukuqhubeka. Ukuba usenethemba lokubuyela kunye neqabane lakho, okanye usajongana nosizi oluninzi kunye nobukrakra obujikeleze ukwahlukana, awukulungelanga ukuhlukana kwetyala.
Ngaphambi kokuba udlulele kubudlelwane obutsha, kufuneka uyeke obudala. Ngamanye amaxesha ukuyeka kuthatha ixesha elide kunokuba bekulindelwe. Yiyeke iqhubeke ikhosi yayo yendalo kwaye wenze okuninzi ukuze uzondle njengoko usiya phambili.
Xa uziva uphelele kwaye wonwabile ngaphakathi kwakho, ukulungele ukuqhubekeka kwaye uqale ukuthandana kwakhona. Zinike ixesha lokufika apho.
Thatha amanyathelo asebenzayo okuqhawula umtshato
Ngaba ufanele uthandane nisahlukene?
Uqhawulo-mtshato lungathatha ixesha elide ukugqibezela. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba wena okanye iqabane lakho urhuqa iinyawo zakho kuyo nayiphi na into, inokuba luphawu lokuba omnye wenu akakakulungeli ukuyeka okwangoku.
Nyaniseka kwisiqu sakho. Ngaba ukulungele ngokwenene ukuqhawula umtshato? Linyathelo elikhulu eli, kwaye kungokwemvelo ukuziva ungathandabuzi. Kwelinye icala, ukuba ufumana izizathu zokuvumela izinto ziqhubeke, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ufumana izizathu zokuzibamba.
Ukuba ufuna ukudlulela kunye nokuhla kwakhona, kuya kufuneka ulungele ukugqibezela ukuphela komtshato wakho. Kunzima, kodwa ukuba nobabini niqinisekile ukuba uxolelwaniso alunakwenzeka, kuphela kwenyathelo elinengqiqo. Emva koko, ungaqala ukuthandana ngelixa nisahlukene ngokwasemthethweni.
Lumkela isaphulelo
Ulwalamano olubuyayo luyingozi yokwenene. Ukuba ukwisaphulelo, kunokwenzeka ukuba wenze izigqibo ezimbi okanye ungene kubudlelwane ngazo zonke izizathu ezingalunganga. Kuqhelekile ukuba uzive ulilolo kwaye usengozini emva koqhawulo-mtshato, kodwa ayisosizathu sokungxamela ubudlelwane obutsha. Ngapha koko, sisizathu esihle sokuba ungakwenzi oko.
Ukuba ujonge umntu oza kuvala isikhewu esishiywe liqabane lakho langaphambili, ngekhe uzenzele ezona khetho zibalaseleyo. Ukuba uthanda umntu ngokunyanisekileyo, eso sisizathu esihle sokuqala ukuthandana ngelixa nihlukene.
Kodwa ukuba ujonge nje indlela yokuziva ulilolo, luphawu lokuba awukenzi ngenkqubo yokuphilisa okwangoku.
Nyaniseka kwasekuqaleni
Kuza kuba njani ukuqala ukuthandana nomfazi otshatileyo ohlukene? Okanye, ukuthandana nendoda eyahluliweyo engayi kuqhawula umtshato?
Ukuba ukulungele ukudlulela kwaye ugqiba kwelokuba ewe kumhla, thembeka kwiqabane lakho elinokubakho kwasekuqaleni. Ngaba ukwahlukana kwakho kuya kubabeka abanye abantu? Ngokunyanisekileyo, ewe kuya kuba njalo. Kodwa ukufumanisa ukuba kwangoko kwangoko kuphela kwento enobulungisa kuni nobabini.
Phambi kokuba uqale ukuthandana ngelixa wohlukene, kufuneka wazi umhla wakho omtsha kulungile kunye nenqanaba lakho lwangoku, kwaye banelungelo lokwazi ukuba usatshatile ngokusemthethweni.
Akunyanzelekanga ukuba ubaxelele zonke iinkcukacha zokuqhawuka komtshato wakho, kodwa ubazise ukuba uqhawulo-mtshato luyenzeka (ukuba akunjalo, unokufuna ukuphinda ucinge ngokuthandana de kube kunjalo), kwaye ucace ukuba uxolelwaniso ne ex yakho ayisiyonto uyifunayo.
Ukuthandana ngelixa uhlukene phakathi kunokwenzeka, kodwa kuphela ukuba unyanisekile kuwe kunye neqabane lakho. Thatha ixesha lakho ngokwakho. Vumela ukuba uphilise kwaye uqhelane nenkampani yakho ngaphambi kokufuna ubudlelwane obutsha.