Umxholo
- 1. Ukungabikho kotyalo-mali komnye nomnye nasemtshatweni wakho
- 2. Lawula iDrama
- 3. Ukulibala ngobuhlobo bakho
- 4. Izinto ezingenakulindeleka okanye ezicingelwayo
Akusiyo imfihlo ukuba amaqondo oqhawulo-mtshato ahlala ephezulu. Uqhawulo mtshato lusoyikiso lokwenyani nakwesiphi na isibini nangona uninzi lukhona, ukuba ayingabo bonke abantu abatshatayo ngaphandle komnqweno wokuqhawula umtshato! Imiba yemali kunye nonxibelelwano olubi zezinye zezona zizathu zibalulekileyo nezicacileyo zokuba kutheni imitshato isilela. Kodwa zikho ezinye izizathu zokuba imitshato isilele nayo enokuhlala ingahoywa. Ezinye zezi zizathu ziyamangalisa kwaye zibonakala ngathi zikhohlakele, ngelixa ezinye zicacile (umzekelo, ukungathembeki, okanye ukuxhatshazwa). Ukuba wenza inqaku lokuqonda ezinye zezona zizathu ziphambili zokuba imitshato isilele kwaye ufunde indlela yokukhusela umtshato wakho kule mingeni, uyakugcina ubomi obude, ukonwaba, kunye nempilo yomtshato wakho ukuwugcina usenzeka kwiminyaka emininzi ezayo.
Nazi izizathu ezihlanu ezimangalisayo zokuba imitshato isilele, kunye nolwazi malunga nendlela yokukhusela umtshato wakho kwezi ngxaki
1. Ukungabikho kotyalo-mali komnye nomnye nasemtshatweni wakho
Ukutyala ixesha lakho ekufundeni ukuba yintoni ebandakanyekileyo ekwenzeni umtshato usebenze, usebenza ekuziphuhliseni nasekutyala imali kwiinjongo zakho zobomi ekwabelwana ngazo njengesibini kubalulekile kwimitshato eyonwabileyo, esempilweni kunye nexesha elide.
Xa kuziwa ekubambeni ikhondo lomsebenzi, siyazi ukuba kufuneka sityale imali kwizakhono zokufumana kunye nokugcina impumelelo kodwa ngenxa yesizathu esingaqhelekanga, asisoloko sicinga ukuba sidinga naziphi na izakhono zokugcina umtshato. Ukungatyali imali emtshatweni wakho kunye nokukhula komntu kuyingozi enkulu kwaye onokuyiphepha ngokulula.
Qinisekisa ukuba umtshato wakho uhlala uqinile ngokunika ingqalelo ekukhuleni kwakho kunye nasemtshatweni; Ukucebisa ngesibini, iincwadi, kunye nokuzibophelela ekusebenziseni iiyure ezimbalwa veki nganye kuvavanyo lobomi bakho bomtshato kunye nobudlelwane bakho kunye zonke iindlela onokuqala ngazo ukwenza utyalomali olunje. Emva koko ukusebenza kunye ukwazisa okanye ukwenza naluphi na utshintsho oluyimfuneko, ngaphandle kokugxeka okanye ukugweba, kuya kuqinisekisa ukuba ungasiphawula esi sizathu siqhelekileyo sokuba kutheni imitshato isilela kuluhlu lwakho lwezisongelo emtshatweni wakho.
2. Lawula iDrama
Rhoqo kunokubakho “iidrama zolawulo” ezingeyomfuneko ngendlela esinxibelelana ngayo nabatshati. Umzekelo; Sinokubonisa ukungakwazi ukuwaxolela amaqabane ethu, ukuba nomsindo nakumceli mngeni omncinci kwindlela esiziphethe ngayo, ukujonga onke amaqabane ethu ukuze siphephe ukuba nencoko ezinentsingiselo, okanye sidlale umhlaseli okanye ixhoba. Idrama yolawulo enjalo inokuba sisizathu sokuba imitshato isilele.
Xa singakwazi ukubona ukuba sinxibelelana njani, ngakumbi, indlela esikuphepha ngayo ukujongana nayo nayiphi na indlela yokuziphatha kwethu enzima, iipateni, kunye neemvakalelo ezingaphantsi, kunokuba nzima ukuxoxa ngokuzolileyo ngemicimbi abajamelana nayo abantu abatshatileyo ekuhambeni kwexesha. Emva koko siphinda-phinda indlela esiziphethe ngayo-siqikelela iidrama zethu zolawulo kuwo onke amaqabane ethu nabantwana. Iphethini engaze inike iqabane ithuba lokukhula okanye lokudibanisa ukungafani kwabo, okanye lokuphilisa ixesha labo elidlulileyo. Imiba enzulu kangako inokuba negalelo kumtshato ongenampilo kunye nokude ekuhambeni kwexesha.
Le yingxaki ekulula ukusonjululwa, ibandakanya ukuzibonisa ngokwakho, ukuze ukwazi ukubona iipateni kunye nokuziphatha kwakho, kunye nokuzimisela ukuba sesichengeni, kunye nokuthoba ukuzikhusela. Kwaye ukuba ungqina indlela oziphethe ngayo kwiqabane lakho, kuyakufuneka ubonelele ngendawo engagwebiyo, eyonyamezelayo kwiqabane lakho ukuba libonakalise imeko yabo yokuba sesichengeni, uloyiko okanye ixhala (yile nto bayikhuselayo ngedrama yabo yolawulo).
3. Ukulibala ngobuhlobo bakho
Iyahlekisa into yokuba kwezinye iimeko into yokuba isibini sitshatile kubonakala ngathi songeza uxinzelelo kubudlelwane obenzeke ngaphambili. Ewe kunjalo, sonke siyazi ukuba umtshato uyasebenza, kodwa ngandlela thile yonke into iqala ukuba nzulu ngandlela thile kunokuba kufanelekile. Umtshato konke malunga nokwakha ubomi kunye, kwaye ewe kuthatha umsebenzi, kodwa ingxaki kukuba ngamanye amaxesha ubudlelwane, uthando, kunye nobuhlobo obabusenziwa phakathi kwamaqabane ngaphambi komtshato buye balahleke 'kubomi bomtshato' kwaye esi sesinye isizathu sokuba imitshato isilele. Ubudlelwane okanye ubuhlobo buyalityalwa kwenye indawo apha endleleni. Endaweni yoxinzelelo kukugcina umtshato.
Ukuba ucinga ngomtshato njengokuzibophelela ekwakheni ubomi kunye obabandakanya abantwana, imali, ubomi ngokubanzi, kunye nobudlelwane bakho kunye nobuhlobo kunye, uya kuhlala usondele. Oku kuyakugcina uthando, ubudlelwane kunye nobuhlobo obenze ukuba nobabini niqonde ukuba benifuna ukuhlala ubomi benu kunye kwasekuqaleni. Ukuba unxibelelana neqabane lakho ngokubeka ubuhlobo kunye ne-bond enayo ngaphambili; kungekudala uza kusebenza neminye yemiceli mngeni yobomi ngokungathi liphupha.
4. Izinto ezingenakulindeleka okanye ezicingelwayo
Esi sisihloko esinokudityaniswa nendlela esinxibelelana ngayo; sisizathu esikhulu esenza ukuba imitshato isilele. Kodwa kulula ukuyilawula.
Sisoloko silindele amaqabane ethu okanye abanye abantu abasingqongileyo abahlala besishiya sidanile xa amaqabane ethu engafezekisi oko kulindelweyo. Into uninzi lwethu olungayiqondiyo kukuba akunakwenzeka ukuhlangabezana nolindelo lomntu - ngakumbi ukuba olo lindelo aluxelelwanga ngomntu kulindeleke ukuba aziphathe ngendlela ethile!
Kukho isizathu esilula soku-Sinombono owahlukileyo wehlabathi elisingqongileyo. Sonke siqhuba ulwazi ngokwahlukileyo. Into ebalulekileyo kwaye ebonakala isengqiqweni ngokupheleleyo komnye umntu isenokungafikeleli ekwaziseni ngomnye umntu, kwaye akukho mntu ukhethekileyo kule meko.
Ingcinga yokugqibela
Ke xa sinolindelo komnye nomnye kodwa singazichazi omnye komnye, omnye umntu akanalo ithuba. Baza kukuyeka ngenxa yokuba abayi kuba nangcamango malunga nento oyifunayo. Iyavakala ke into yokuba wenze umkhuba wokuxoxa ngokulindelweyo kuyo yonke indawo yobomi bakho kunye nolwalamano kunye. Oku akuthethi ukuba ngenxa yokuba unethemba lokuba iqabane lakho kufuneka lenze into elindelweyo, kodwa livula umgangatho wengxoxo, uthethathethwano kunye nolungelelwaniso. Ukuze ube nakho ukufumana umhlaba ophakathi, kwaye ke omabini amaqabane azive eviwa kwaye evunyiwe omnye nomnye.