Umxholo
Ukuhlala nomntu yinto enokulindeleka xa abantu ababini bebopha iqhina. Nangona kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha, ezi zinto zimbini azihambelani. Ukuxoxa ngoncedo kunye nokungalunganga kokuhlala kunye njengesibini esitshatileyo okanye njengamaqabane obomi alula sisihloko esineengxaki ezininzi kwizibini ezitshatileyo. Nokuba lolunye kwezi zigqibo zimbini lunika isisombululo seyona ngxaki inzima isibini ekujongwe ukuba sisendleleni kuya kuhlala kubonakala.
Ukuphonononga ukuhlala kubudlelwane
Ukuhlala kunye ngaphandle kokutshata ngokusemthethweni kunokuba yinto eqinisekisayo malunga nenkululeko kunye nokuzibophelela. Ngelixa uninzi lwabantu lukufumanisa oku kungathandani kwaye kuthuthuzela kunokuba betshatile namaqabane abo, oko kuyangqina mpikiswano eqinileyo xa kufikwa kwindlela abantu abayibona ngayo imiqobo.
Ukusuka kwimbono enye, abantu ababini abagqiba kwelokuba bafuna ukwabelana ngobomi babo kunye kwaye bangene phantsi kophahla olunye banokuyenza ngokungxamisekileyo ekuqaleni, kodwa hayi kakhulu ekuhambeni kwexesha. Izibini ezininzi ziye zaqhekeka emva kokuhlala kunye. Nangona oko kunokubonakala kulula ukwenza okanye kunokuba kungathandeki malunga nokuzibophelela, kodwa kwabo bathatha isigqibo sokuzingisa kwaye bahlale kunye ngaphandle kwamaqhina omthetho ngokuchaseneyo kuyaqinisekiswa. Ayifane yenzeke into yokuba izibini ezingatshatanga zibe noloyiko olufana nokwahlula-hlula ii-asethi, utshintsho kumgangatho womtshato kunye nendlela oku okunokuchaphazela ngayo umfanekiso wabo, nokuba kungokobuqu okanye bubungcali. Ngokuchasene noko, abantu abatshatileyo bahlala befumana ubudlelwane obungenaluthando kunye nokungonwabi ngenxa yezi zizathu. Ngandlel 'ithile, umntu ozibophelela ngokuzithandela ukuhlala nawe uzibonakalisa ngakumbi malunga nokuzinikezela kunye nomdla kunaye umntu owenza njalo ngenxa yephepha abalisayinileyo kwiholo yedolophu. Nangona kunjalo, oku kunqabile ukubonwa okanye ukuxabiswa kwaye uninzi lwabantu lusokoliswa kukungazithembi xa kubudlelwane bexesha elide bengatshatanga namaqabane abo.
Ukuphonononga umtshato
Ngaphandle kwezinto ozithandayo okanye ozikhethayo, kukho umba ekukholelwa ukuba uza neziphumo ezibi zengqondo kubantwana abazelwe ngaphandle komtshato. Ngelixa isenokungabi yinto enkulu kubazali, umntwana usenokubandezeleka ngokungeyomfuneko ngokuxhomekeke kwilizwe nakwinkcubeko azalelwe kuyo. Isihloko sokuba nokukhulisa umntwana ngaphandle komtshato sihlala siyinto eqhelekileyo kwiindawo ezininzi zehlabathi. Uluvo loMbutho ngalo mbandela lunefuthe elibi kwindlela abanye abantu abayibona ngayo kwaye benze ngayo oku. Nakumazwe akhuthaza inkululeko kwizinga eliphezulu, usenokufumana iimeko zokuxhatshazwa kwabantwana nolutsha ngokuzalwa “ngaphandle komtshato”.
Ke, ingxaki ihleli: Ngaba kunokuba kulunge ukuba umntu aqhubeke engatshatanga kwaye esenabantwana?
Impendulo kufuneka ibe ngu "ewe ngokungathandabuzekiyo", kodwa isenokungabi njalo kuxhomekeka kwindawo ohlala kuyo!
“Ukwabelana ngesondo ngokuzithandela phakathi komntu otshatileyo nomntu ongelilo iqabane lakhe” - leyo yinkcazo yokukrexeza. Kodwa yintoni oyibiza ngokuba sisenzo sokungcatsha iqabane lakho xa ungatshatanga ngokusemthethweni? Ngaba ikhona into enokwenziwa malunga nomthetho? Ngawaphi amanyathelo ekufuneka ethathwe kwimeko enjalo? Ewe, le yinto exhomekeke ikakhulu kumgaqo nakwicalucalulo xa umntu engatshatanga neqabane lakhe. Ukuba kungcono okanye kubi ngakumbi ukuthembela ekuziphatheni endaweni yomthetho, ixhomekeke ngokungqongqo kwimbono yomntu nakwiimeko.
Xa umntu othile egqiba ekubeni ahlukane neqabane lakhe ngenxa yokukrexeza kwicala lomlingane wakhe kuyomeleza ukuba ube kwicala lakho. Imbuyekezo encinci njengoko kunokuba njalo, kuyimbuyekezo nangona kunjalo. Kodwa kule mihla izivumelwano zangaphambi komtshato azisajongwa njengesenzo semitshato egxekayo kunye nothando, ke nokuba ukukrexeza akusenazo iimpembelelo ebekade enazo-ewe, ngokusemthethweni, kungathethi ngokweemvakalelo. Ke, ekugqibeleni, iingenelo umntu anokuba nazo kwimeko enje ayisoloko ingaphezulu kwezo zesibini esingatshatanga. Nangona kunjalo, intetho ethi "Kukhuseleke ngcono kunokuba uxolise." uhlala umgaqo ofanayo emva koko uninzi lusakhokela ubudlelwane babo.
Ukuphikisana njengoko kunokuba sisigqibo kwisenzo esinye, umhlaba apho isigqibo kufuneka senziwe kuxhomekeke kwinto oyifunayo nendlela ofuna ukuyiphumeza ngayo. Ngaphambi kokwenza isigqibo ngokungxama malunga noku, xoxa neqabane lakho malunga:
Zithini izizathu zokufuna ukuhlala kunye okanye ukutshata?
- Yintoni oyilindeleyo malunga nokuhlala kwethu kunye / ukutshata?
- Zithini iinjongo zakho zexesha elizayo kwaye ucwangcisa njani ukuziphumeza?
- Uyakwenza ntoni xa konke kungahambi kakuhle?
Nje ukuba umisele oku kuya kuba lula ukugqiba ukuba umtshato okanye ubudlelwane bokuhlala yeyona nto ikulungeleyo.