Umxholo
- Izizathu zokuba isibini sifuna ukwahlukana
- Nayi eminye imibuzo eluncedo onokuzibuza yona:
- Ngaba ukwahlukana kulungile emtshatweni?
Ukwahlukana unako ulungele umtshato kuba uthatha uxinzelelo kwinkqubo kwaye wenze indawo ebonakalayo, enokuthi ibe luncedo olukhulu ekuxhaseni ukubonakaliswa komntu kunye nokwenza izigqibo ngokucacileyo.
Oku kunengqiqo ngokwesayensi, njengoko kuye kwafakazelwa ukuba ii-IQ zethu ziyayeka xa sixinezelekile. Ke ngoko, ukuba umntu omnye okanye bobabini banengxaki yoxinzelelo olungapheliyo iminyaka, kulula ukubona indlela okwahlukana okwethutyana ngayo UCanzibe ukuququzelela ukucaca kwengqondo.
Ndifuna ukugxininisa ukuba nangona bekukho iimeko ezininzi apho ukwahlukana kuye kwandisa kwaye komeleza iqhina lomtshato, kuye kwakho iimeko apho ukwahlukana kubangele ukungavisisani okungakumbi, ixhala, ingqumbo, kunye nokungakhululeki.
Umzekelo, kwizibini ezitshatileyo apho bekukho ukungathembeki okanye ukuba elinye lamaqabane linemvakalelo yokungathembani okanye umona ogqithisileyo, ukwahlukana kunokongeza kuphela umlilo kumlilo osele uvutha ngokukhawuleza. Kwakhona, oku kukuqwalaselwa ngokubanzi, kwaye kwenzeka kwimeko nganye-kwisibini ngasinye. (Njengoko ezinye izibini ezinembali yokungathembeki zenze kakuhle ngexesha lokwahlukana).
Izizathu zokuba isibini sifuna ukwahlukana
Ukuthatha ixesha lokubonakalisa ngokunyanisekileyo kunye nokunxibelelana noko iqabane ngalinye lifuna ngokwenene kubalulekile. Ndifuna ukwenza umahluko apha phakathi kokubonisa kunye nokuqaqamba.
Xa ndisithi ukubonakalisa, andithethi ngokwenza uluhlu lwe-pro's kunye ne-con's okanye ukuphinda-phinda ukuphinda-phinda, "ii-mindloops" ezinganyangekiyo zokungakhathali izibini ezininzi ezibambelele kuzo. Ndithetha ngakumbi malunga nokubonisa komntu wonke umntu ukuqonda.
Xa izibini zixinekile kwimijikelezo yokurhabaxa, ayisiyonto iluncedo nje kuphela, kodwa ibhloka ukuvela kobudlelwane. Oku kwenzeka xa umntu ngamnye ebanjwe kukucinga kwabo ngesiqhelo ngamaqabane abo kunye nomtshato, ukuba kukho indawo encinci yokucinga ngokutsha okanye isisombululo sokuyila esiza kuza.Ukuchaza kwabathengi ukuba ukubambelela kule ndlela kufana nokuba kumdlalo we-ping-pong, apho ngenye imini baziva ngathi bayamthanda lo mntu kwaye bafuna ukuyenza isebenze, kwaye ngokulandelayo baziva ngathi abanakuma.
Ke, inyathelo lokuqala kukuvavanya ukuba uphi ngokwenene. Ngokwesiqhelo, elinye iqabane linotyekelo olunamandla lokufuna ukwahlukana okanye ukuqhawula umtshato kunelinye. Ke ngoko, ukuba elinye lamaqabane sele lenze isigqibo sokuba "lihambile ixesha, akafuni ukuzama ukwenza umtshato usebenze", ukwahlukana akunakulindeleka.
Kwelinye icala, ukuba uluvo jikelele lwamaqabane omabini “Andazi ukuba ndifuna ukuhlala kunye” okanye “Ndifuna ukuzama yonke into ukwenza lo msebenzi”, ukwahlukana kunokuba sisixhobo esiluncedo ekuvavanyeni ikamva yobudlelwane.
Nayi eminye imibuzo eluncedo onokuzibuza yona:
1. Zithini izizathu zakho zokufuna ukohlukana?
2. Zithini izizathu zakho zokufuna ukuhlala kulomtshato uwenze usebenze?
3. Ngaba izizathu zakho zokuba ufuna ukugcina umtshato zihambelana nantoni na neqabane lakho?
Ukuba izizathu zakho zokuhlala emtshatweni kungenxa yabantwana, kuba unenkxalabo yokuba abanye abantu bacinga ntoni, okanye uxanduva lokuziphatha, ukuthatha ithuba lokucinga ngeemfuno zakho kunye nezinto ozifunayo kunokuba luncedo kakhulu.
Kukho uxinzelelo oluninzi lwenkcubeko kunye nemibono ebeka ukubaluleka kokuhlala kunye kwindlu enye ngenxa yabantwana, ngenxa yedumela, njl.njl.
Inye into enokuba luncedo kakhulu xa uqala ukuqaphela iqabane lakho lisiya lisiba neemvakalelo malunga nengcebiso ethile efana nokwahlukana, ukuthi "Kulungile. Kutheni singabuyeli emva koko kamva? ” Rhoqo, xa iqabane likwimo eyahlukileyo yengqondo, liya kuqwalasela iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokhetho.
Ngaba ukwahlukana kulungile emtshatweni?
Kuyaxhomekeka. Esona sithintelo sikhulu ndisibonayo kukuba abantu bayeke imeko yabo yongxamiseko kunye noxinzelelo lweemvakalelo baphange indlela abacinga ngayo kunye nezenzo zabo, endaweni yokulinda de abe yena ucacelwe ukuba aqhubeke njani. Zonke iimvakalelo ziyadlula, nditsho nokungonwabi.
Ngamanye amaxesha inkqubo yokufumana ukuqonda okanye ukucacisa ukuba leliphi inyathelo oza kulithatha emtshatweni wakho ithatha ixesha elide kunokuba abantu befuna njalo, kodwa kufanelekile ukuba kwenziwe uphando kwaye ulinde.
Yikholwe okanye ungakholelwa, amandla omntu okomelela abonakala ngeendlela ezimangalisayo nakwiimeko ezinzima njengokuhlukana noqhawulo mtshato. Onke amalungu osapho, kubandakanya nabantwana, banengcinga enye kuphela kude nesisombululo esisebenzayo, kwaye nokuba yintoni, wonke umntu unakho ukufikelela kukomelela okuzelweyo.