Umxholo
- Thatha isigqibo sokuba uyafuna ngokwenene ukuhlala
- Thumela onke amaqela esithathu
- Khokela ngentlonipho nobubele
- Funda kwiimpazamo ezidlulileyo
- Yonwabani ngokwenene omnye nomnye
Uninzi lwethu luthathile ingqalelo okanye lwazama okwahlukileyo iindlela zokuvuselela uthando kubudlelwane. Kukho nje unxibelelwano lothando olufanele ithuba lesibini. Xa uzimisele ngokwenene ngokwenza oko ngempumelelo, ukwazi indlela yokuvuselela uthando kubudlelwane ngokuqinisekileyo akuyongozi.
Ukucinga ukuba ungaluvuselela njani ulwalamano kunye nomntu owayekade usebenza kunye nokwenza oko ngempumelelo zizinto ezimbini ezahlukeneyo ngokupheleleyo. Kulula ukuthi, "Siza kubona apho iya khona" kodwa awucingi ukuba unxibelelwano lokwenyani lufuna umzamo omncinci?
Ukuba kunjalo, qhubeka ufunda ukuze wazi ezinye zeendlela ezilungileyo zokuvuselela uthando emtshatweni okanye kubudlelwane.
Thatha isigqibo sokuba uyafuna ngokwenene ukuhlala
Ngaphambi kokugxila ulubuyisela njani uthando kubudlelwane okanye indlela yokuvuselela uthando emtshatweni, qala uthathe isigqibo sokuba uyafuna nyani ukuhlala. Nyaniseka nge-100% kuwe kwaye uyiqonde into ozibophelela kuyo.
'Uluvuselela njani uthando kubudlelwane' yinkqubo egcwele uthando kunye namaxesha amnandi kodwa izibini kufuneka zingene nakwizihloko ezinzulu ngokunjalo. Ukoyisa imicimbi edlulileyo kunokuba ngumceli mngeni kwaye kukuwe ukuba uthathe isigqibo sokuba ngaba lowo ngumsebenzi owulungeleyo.
Ngaphandle kwalonto, kukho umbuzo wokuba ucinga ukuba lo mntu ungowakho phakathi kwezinye izinto. Uluhlu lokuqwalaselwa lude kodwa zenzele ubabalo kwaye uhambe ngononophelo nganye nganye. Ukuba intliziyo kunye nengqondo yakho ithi ewe, ufuna ukuzilungisa izinto.
Nje ukuba uqiniseke ukuba umntu omleqayo ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo ngulowo ufuna ukuchitha ubomi bakho kunye naye, inkqubo yokuvuselela umtshato wakho okanye ubudlelwane buya kuba lula kakhulu.
Thumela onke amaqela esithathu
Inkqubo ye- inkqubo yokuvuselela kufuneka ibandakanye abantu ababini kuphela. Xa abanye bethatha inxaxheba (njengabahlobo abasondeleyo kunye nosapho), uxinzelelo oluninzi lubekwa kulwalamano. Ngaphambi kokuba wazi ukuba ukhathazekile malunga nokuba abanye abantu bafuna ntoni kunale nto uyifunayo.
Nayiphi na imicimbi yentliziyo igcinwa iyimfihlo. Abo banobudlelwane obumangalisayo banento enye efanayo, bagcina abanye ngaphandle.
Nangona kunjalo, oku akuthethi ukuba xa izinto ziphuma esandleni awukwazi ukufumana uncedo kwiingcali ezinje ngobudlelwane okanye umcebisi womtshato. Ukufuna umcebisi kunokukunceda wena kunye neqabane lakho ukuba nifumane umbono omtsha malunga neemvakalelo zomnye nomnye.
Ubukho obungakhethi cala kunye nokungabikho kokugweba komcebisi kuko okubahlula kulo naliphi na elinye iqela lesithathu. Banokukunceda ukuba ubone inyani njengoko injalo, ayizisi kuphela elubala ebomini bakho kodwa nakubudlelwane bakho.
Khokela ngentlonipho nobubele
Xa ufuna ukuba izinto zisebenze, kuya kufuneka uqalise ukuqala kwakhona. Eyona ndlela yokwenza oko yile ezisisiseko kulwalamano enokuphunyezwa kulo lonke ubudlelwane.
Enye yazo yintlonipho. Ingxaki yile, sonke siyayazi indlela yokubonisa imbeko kodwa abanye abayazi ukuba ithetha ntoni kanye kubudlelwane.
Intlonipho kubudlelwane kuthetha ukuhlonipha imida, ukuvuleka kulungelelwaniso, ukuba nolwazelelelo, ukuqonda, kwaye okona kubaluleke kakhulu, ukhetha amagama akho ngobulumko. Amagama ethu ahlala asifaka engxakini kwaye yeyona ndlela sibonisa ukungabi nantlonelo kakhulu.
Ngokubhekisele kububele, loo nxalenye kulula. Akukho mntu unqwenela ukuba kubudlelwane obungabandakanyi ububele. Isimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo kunye nezinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka zenza uthando luhlale luhleli. Ungaze uzame ukulimaza iimvakalelo zomnye umntu okanye umbonise ukuba akalunganga. Endaweni yoko, jolisa ekukhuthazeni ulonwabo nothando.
Ungavumeli ulwalamano lwakho lubambeke kumjikelo apho umntu ngamnye afune izinto komnye nomnye, ezinje ngembeko kunye nobubele ngelixa uthandabuza ukuba ube ngowokuqala ukuzinikela. Ngalo lonke ixesha khumbula ukuba ithamsanqa lisoloko lithanda abakhaliphileyo.
Isizathu sokuba uthando luthathwe njengolunomvuzo omkhulu kukuba iingozi zothando zinobuzaza kakhulu kwaye ziyingozi.
Funda kwiimpazamo ezidlulileyo
Abanye bacebisa ukuba izibini zijonge ukuqonda kwenziwa kanjani uvuselele uthando kufuneka bazivumele ukuba baqhubele phambili. Ewe, omabini la maqela kufuneka oyise ixesha elidlulileyo kodwa kufuneka bafunde kwiimpazamo zabo. Iimpazamo zibaluleke ngokwenene.
Jonga iimpazamo ozenzileyo xa uthando lwaqala ukwehla. Ngaba ubuya kuthembeka ngakumbi okanye uvule ngakumbi? Mhlawumbi bekufanele ukuba ubeke iinzame zokuba unxibelelane ngcono.
Ngaba ubile izinto ezincinci kwaye ubangela uxinzelelo olungeyomfuneko? Nantoni na oyenzileyo ephosakeleyo, sebenzisa iimpazamo zakho ukuyilungisa kwaye utshintshe ezo ndlela uziphethe ngayo. Ngoku lithuba lakho lesibini.
Kweli nqanaba ku ukuvuselela ubudlelwaneOmabini la maqela kufuneka ajolise kwiziqu zabo nakwindlela abaziphethe ngayo. Bobabini kufuneka balwele ukukhula komntu. Eli ayiloxesha lokuxelela omnye umntu ukuba benze ntoni engalunganga kodwa uthathe amanyathelo wokuba liqabane elingcono.
Xa abantu ababini bekwazi ukukhula kwaye bafunde kwimicimbi edlulileyo kunokuba babambe, ithuba lokuvuselela ubudlelwane lonyuka kakhulu.
Ukuziva unetyala lutshaba lothando lwenene kwaye ukuba ucinga ngokubuyela umlingane wakho kuya kufuneka uzame ukuxolela kwaye ulibale iimpazamo ezenziwe ngomnye wenu.
Yonwabani ngokwenene omnye nomnye
Ukuvuselela ubudlelwane lixesha elonwabisayo kubantu ababini ababandakanyekayo. Zombini zinethuba lokuphinda zinxibelelane kwinqanaba lengqondo, leemvakalelo kunye nomzimba.
Ukwenza olo nxibelelwano, yiya kwimihla, ubaleke okwethutyana, cofa ixesha elisemgangathweni nanini na xa unokwenza kwaye wenze inxenye yobomi bakho bemihla ngemihla.
Ngamanye amagama, wamkele ebomini bakho kwakhona.
Yonke ubudlelwane ifuna ixesha kunye nexesha kubaluleke ngakumbi xa ukuvuselela uthando. Ukuba kunye nomntu odibanisa naye kwakhona kukuvumela ukuba ube namava abo.
Ufanele uthathe izinto ezincinci ezenza ukuba zibamangalisa njengobukrelekrele babo, uburharha kunye nendlela amehlo abo akhanyisa ngayo xa benomdla ngento ethile. Ixesha kunye nomnye kuphela kwendlela yokunandipha ngokwenene.