Umxholo
- Yintoni umona, ngokuchanekileyo?
- 1. Umntu ufuna lonke ixesha lakho lasimahla
- 2. Bajonge "imiqondiso" yokuba uyabakhohlisa
- 3. Bayigxeka imidla yakho yangaphandle
- 4. Umntu uyaxhuma xa engakwazi ukukubamba
- 1. Iimvakalelo akufuneki zenziwe
- 2. Zikhumbuze ukuba awukwazi ukulawula iqabane lakho
- 3. Cinga kwakhona malunga nendlela ocinga ngayo malunga nobudlelwane
- 4. Kholelwa kubuchule bakho bothando
Ngaba uluhlobo lomntu onokuziva unomona kubudlelwane?
Inqanaba elincinci lomona liqhelekile. Ubona umntu othandana naye echitha ixesha elininzi encokola naloo mntu usebenza naye eshushu eofisini yakho yeKrisimesi, ke ukuziva unomona kwaye ungazithembi kunokuba yinto eqhelekileyo.
Kodwa ubukhwele obuninzi, uhlobo apho ubeka khona amajelo akhe ezentlalo ngalo lonke ixesha umbiza kuwo wonke umntu obhinqileyo ophawula kwizithuba zakhe? Oko kunokonakalisa kungekuphela ulwalamano lwakho kodwa noxolo lwengqondo lwemihla ngemihla.
Ikhwele elininzi kakhulu kubudlelwane alunampilo. Ingakhokelela esiphelweni sobudlelwane bakho.
Ewe kungakhokelela ekubulaweni kwabantu, khumbula u-O.J. Simpson?
Yintoni umona, ngokuchanekileyo?
Umona yimvakalelo evela kwimvakalelo ephantsi yokuzixabisa. Ngenxa yokuba ungaziva ukhuselekile, uyakhathazeka kwaye ube nexhala xa iqabane lakho linomdla komnye umntu.
Abantu abanomona baziva besoyikiswa kukuba amaqabane abo aya kufumana omnye umntu onomtsalane ngakumbi kwaye abashiye.
Umntu onomona uziva ngathi kuncinane anokukunikela kwaye konke okuya kuthatha iqabane labo ukubashiya lelinye ibhinqa, "elingcono" kunabo.
Ikhwele elincinci linokumcenga iqabane lakho. Banokubona oku njengophawu lokuba ubathanda ngokwenene, kwaye banyanisile. Kodwa inqanaba elingaqhelekanga lomona alikhohlisi. Ingabonisa umba onzulu wezempilo yengqondo.
Zeziphi ezinye zezinto ezibonisa inqanaba lempilo lomona kubudlelwane?
1. Umntu ufuna lonke ixesha lakho lasimahla
Xa uthando lutsha kuqhelekile ukufuna ukuba nomdla wakho wothando kangangoko.
Abantu abaphilileyo bayaqonda ukuba oku akusoloko kusenzeka. Abantu kufuneka basebenze, baneembopheleleko ngaphandle komsebenzi, bathanda ukuya kwindawo yokuzivocavoca, benze izinto zabo zokuzonwabisa, njl.
Umntu onomona omkhulu uyalicaphukela ixesha alichithe kude kubo kwaye bayalazisa iqabane labo ngokukhala, ukukhalaza, ngamanye amaxesha nokulila.
Yiflegi ebomvu yomona kubudlelwane.
2. Bajonge "imiqondiso" yokuba uyabakhohlisa
Umntu onomona soloko urhanela into oyenzayo xa ungekho nabo.
Abakuthembi, ayikuko kuba ubanike isizathu sokuba bangakuthembi, kodwa ngenxa yokuba ukungagqibeki kwabo kukuba ungathembekanga ukuba awukho kubo.
Ukuba unombhalo ongenayo, baya kufuna kwangoko ukwazi ukuba uvela kubani.
Ukuba ushiya ifowuni yakho ngaphandle kwaye ivulekile, baya kuhamba ngemiyalezo yakho kunye ne-imeyile. Ukuba uphume nabahlobo bakho ebusuku, umntu onomona uya kukutsalela umnxeba ukuze aqiniseke ukuba ulapho uthe uza kuba khona.
3. Bayigxeka imidla yakho yangaphandle
Umntu onomona uya kuba nomona kungekuphela nje ngabahlobo bakho kodwa nangendlela olisebenzisa ngayo ixesha lakho lasimahla.
Bazibona ezi zinto njengokhuphiswano kunye nesoyikiso kubo. Ke baya kuyicekisa iminqweno yakho, bayibize ngokuba lusana okanye ukuchitha ixesha.
Baya kufumana impazamo kusapho lwakho kwaye bahlekise ngabahlobo bakho. Iinjongo zabo kukwahlula kuyo yonke into ekuthathela kude kubo, nkqu nosuku.
Lowo ngumqondiso obalaseleyo wobukhwele obungenampilo kubudlelwane!
4. Umntu uyaxhuma xa engakwazi ukukubamba
Umntu onomona akanakuyinyamezela ukuba uyicimile ifowuni yakho kuba use ntlanganisweni, okanye ulele.
Khange ubathumele imiyalezo ngokukhawuleza? Zilungiselele ukungqubana okuthile.
Ukusilela kwakho ekuphenduleni kuthetha ukuba uhoye enye into ngaphandle kwabo, kwaye nomntu onomona, ayamkelekanga.
Ukuba uyazazi nakweyiphi na kwezi nkcazo, uya kufuna ukusebenza ukunciphisa okanye ukuphelisa umona ongenampilo kubudlelwane.
Baya kugxotha ubudlelwane bakho obusondeleyo.
Ukuba, uyasokola ukuba ungayeka njani ukuba nomona kubudlelwane, bukela le vidiyo nguNowa Elkrief.
Nazi ezinye iingcebiso zokunciphisa iimvakalelo zakho zesikhwele kubudlelwane.
1. Iimvakalelo akufuneki zenziwe
Ungabinamona njani? Ewe, ukuqala, xa uqala ukuziva i-monster enamehlo aluhlaza, yima kwaye uyivume.
Ewe uziva unomona. Kodwa inokuma apho. Kunzima ukuyeka ukuba nomona, nangona kunjalo, akukho sidingo sokwenza nantoni na ngaphandle kokuziva unoluvo.
Ukulwa nomona kubudlelwane akukho lula, kodwa ukwamkela imeko yakho yengqondo kunokukunceda wenze uxolo kunye nemeko kwaye uncede ekupheliseni umona, emva koko.
Ziphazamise ngokwenza into ekwenza uzive ukhululekile. Iseshoni yokucamngca ngeziqinisekiso ezithile, umzekelo.
2. Zikhumbuze ukuba awukwazi ukulawula iqabane lakho
Ungasoyisa njani umona ngendlela esempilweni, eguqukayo? Enye yeengcebiso zokufumana umona kukuqonda ukuba umona unokuba sisibulali sobudlelwane cwaka.
Xa iimvakalelo zakho zomona zikwenza ufune ukugcina iithebhu rhoqo apho iqabane lakho likhona ngalo lonke ixesha, khumbula: ukungaqiniseki yinxalenye yobomi obuqhelekileyo. Ukungabikho komnye akuthethi ukuba bakomnye umntu.
Kodwa ukubalawula akusosiqinisekiso sokuba baya kuhlala nawe.
Ngapha koko, iya kukhokelela ekubeni bakushiye. Yoyisa umona kubudlelwane ngaphambi kokuba butyhefe ubomi bakho. Ekugqibeleni, konke malunga nokuzazi ngexesha elifanelekileyo.
3. Cinga kwakhona malunga nendlela ocinga ngayo malunga nobudlelwane
Uthando aluthethi ukuba omabini amaqabane akasokuze atsaleleke nakubani na, ke yeka ukungazithembi.
Kuqhelekile ukuba nobabini nifumane abanye abantu bekhangeleka kakuhle.
Akukho sidingo sokuphosa umona ngenxa yokuba iqabane lakho lithi lifumene uKate Upton entle. Unento eyimfihlo kuRyan Gosling, akunjalo? “Ungatya ukutya kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba awunakujonga kwimenyu”, njengoko isitsho njalo. Kukwanangqondo ukuba nomona ngobuhlobo obudlulileyo,
Enye yeendlela zokuphelisa umona kukuphinda ulungelelanise ulindelo lwakho kwiqabane lakho nakubudlelwane.
Ukuyeka umona kubudlelwane akukho lula. Ukufuna unyango ngomona nokungazithembi kunokukunceda ukhululeke kwiimvakalelo zakho ezingalunganga endaweni yokulwa nayo wedwa.
Ukuba unolindelo olungeyonyani malunga nokuba ubudlelwane bujongeka njani, yenza umsebenzi kunye nonyango ukuze uhlengahlengise oku kulindelweyo, kwaye uncede ukuphelisa iimvakalelo zakho zomona.
Ingcali, ungenelelo ngongenelelo lomntu wesithathu ikunika ukuqonda okufanelekileyo malunga nendlela yokujongana nomona emtshatweni okanye iingcebiso zokoyisa umona nokungazithembi kubudlelwane obusondeleyo.
4. Kholelwa kubuchule bakho bothando
Uninzi lweemvakalelo zekhwele kubudlelwane zivela kwindawo yokuziva ungalufanelanga uthando.
Ke, ungayeka njani ukuba nomona kubudlelwane kwaye woyise unxunguphalo kunye nomsindo okugcwalisayo?
Sebenzela ukuphucula ukuzithemba kwakho kunye neenkolelo zakho malunga nexabiso lakho.
Uya kubona ukuba xa uzixabisa, iimvakalelo zakho zomona kwabanye ziya kuncipha. Uya kuba sendleleni eya kuhlala kwimeko efanelekileyo, elungeleleneyo kunye neyonwabisayo yengqondo.
Ngethemba, ezi ngcebiso zokufumana umona kubudlelwane ziya kukunceda uqaphele, kwaye uyeke ezona mvakalelo zingenamsebenzi, zonakalisayo, kwaye uziyeke.
Njengoko isicatshulwa esidumileyo esivela kuBob Marley siqhubeka nendlela yokufumana imiba yomona, ”Ubomi yindlela enye enkulu eneempawu ezininzi. Ke xa ukhwela kumanqwanqwa, musa ukuyenza nzima ingqondo yakho. Balekela inzondo, ububi, kunye nomona. Musa ukungcwaba iingcinga zakho, beka umbono wakho kwinyani. Vuka uhambe!"
Ke, musa ukuhlazeka ngumona kubudlelwane, vula ucango lokuyivuma kwaye ufunde indlela yokuphatha umona kubudlelwane.