Umxholo
- Usithathile isigqibo
- Umxelela njani umntu otshate naye ukuba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato
- 1. Khetha ixesha elifanelekileyo phambi kokuba uthethe neqabane lakho
- 2. Hlalutya indlela eliziphatha ngayo iqabane lakho
- 3. Ukuthetha ngoqhawulo-mtshato ayisiyiyo ingxoxo-nye
- 4. Musa ukugalela zonke iinkcukacha ngexesha elinye
- 5. Amazwi arhabaxa kunye nokukhwaza akunakunceda
- 6. Sukulivalela ngaphandle iqabane lakho ebomini bakho
- Yintoni elandelayo?
Umtshato ayisiyontsomi.
Luhambo lwabantu ababini abathe bathembisa ukuba kunye xa begula kwaye besempilweni, ukuba kungcono okanye kubi kodwa kwenzeka ntoni xa zonke ezi nguqu zitshintsha? Kwenzeka ntoni xa ungasavuyi nomtshato wakho? Umxelela njani umntu otshate naye ukuba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato?
Iyenzeka; Vuka nje kwaye uqaphele ukuba obu ayibubo ubomi obukade ubufuna kwaye uphoswa yile nto uyifunayo.
Ingavakala ngathi iyazingca ekuqaleni kodwa kuya kufuneka unyaniseke kuwe. Ayisiyonto yokutshintsha ingqondo kwaye ufuna ukuphuma, kodwa sisixa sayo yonke iminyaka benikunye, imicimbi, imicimbi engaphandle komtshato, umlutha, ukuphazamiseka kubuntu, kunye nezinye ezininzi.
Ngamanye amaxesha, ubomi buyenzeka kwaye kufuneka uvume ngokwakho ukuba lixesha lokuphelisa umtshato. Uwaphula njani kwiqabane lakho?
Usithathile isigqibo
Xa ukhathele yonke into kwaye wazama sonke isisombululo asikho kodwa akuncedi nto - ngoku ufuna uqhawulo-mtshato.
Oku kungenzeka ukuba uwele ingqondo yakho amatyeli aliqela kodwa sele uqinisekile? Uqhawulo-mtshato asiyo joke kwaye akulunganga ukutsiba nje kwesi sigqibo ngaphandle kokulinganisa ezinye izinto ezibalulekileyo kuqala.
Nazi ezinye zezinto ekufuneka uzivavanye ngaphambi kokucela uqhawulo-mtshato:
- Usalithanda iqabane lakho?
- Ngaba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato kuba unomsindo?
- Ngaba iqabane lakho linengxaki yobuntu okanye liyakuxhaphaza?
- Ukhe wacinga malunga nokuza kwenzeka kwinkqubo yoqhawulo-mtshato kunye neziphumo eziya kubangela abantwana bakho?
- Ngaba ukulungele ukujongana nobomi ngaphandle kweqabane lakho?
Ukuba uqinisekile ngeempendulo zakho apha, emva koko wenze isigqibo kwaye ngoku kuya kufuneka uthethe neqabane lakho malunga nokuqhubeka noqhawulo-mtshato.
Umxelela njani umntu otshate naye ukuba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato
Kungoku okanye akunjalo. Ngaphambi kokophula iindaba kwiqabane lakho, jonga ezi ngcebiso zinokukunceda.
1. Khetha ixesha elifanelekileyo phambi kokuba uthethe neqabane lakho
Yiba nolwazelelo kwixesha kuba uxelela iqabane lakho ukuba awusonwabanga kwaye ufuna uqhawulo-mtshato ziindaba ezinkulu. Ngapha koko, inokothusa iqabane lakho. Uyalazi iqabane lakho ngcono kunaye nabani na ukuze wazi ukuba uza kuthetha nini kwaye yeyiphi indlela onokuyisebenzisa.
Qinisekisa ukuba ixesha lilungile kwaye iqabane lakho likulungele ngokwasemphefumlweni okanye ubuncinci banakho ukufumana iindaba ezibuhlungu. Yiba nomonde kwaye ukhumbule ukuba ixesha yinto yonke.
Ulixelela njani iqabane lakho ukuba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato xa ubona lo mntu ezama nzima ukulungisa izinto phakathi kwenu nobabini?
Oku kunzima kakhulu kodwa ukuba ugqibe kwelokuba akukho mntu unokukunqanda.
Qiniseka kodwa ungangeni kwiqabane lakho unomsindo okanye ukhwaze. Ukuba unokufumana ixesha elifanelekileyo, uya kuba nakho ukwenza oku. Yiba novelwano kodwa uqine ngamazwi akho. Unokulindela iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokuphendula apha; abanye banokuyamkela ngelixa abanye bengathatha ixesha ngaphambi kokuba iindaba zingene.
2. Hlalutya indlela eliziphatha ngayo iqabane lakho
Emva kokumxelela iindaba, ungafuna ukuhlalutya indlela abasabela ngayo. Ukuba iqabane lakho sele linombono kwaye ukwiphenyane elinye malunga nokuba awusonwabanga emtshatweni, uya kuba nengxoxo ezolileyo malunga nendlela yokwahlukana. Kwelinye icala, ukuba iqabane lakho libonakala limangalisiwe okanye laliwe, ungafuna ukulungela ukuva imibuzo kunye namagama arhabaxa nawo.
Akululanga ukuva ezi ndaba ke lunga kwaye uchaze nje ngokuzolileyo izizathu zakho. Kungcono ukuba nemfihlo kunye nexesha elaneleyo lokuthetha.
3. Ukuthetha ngoqhawulo-mtshato ayisiyiyo ingxoxo-nye
Isikakhulu le yeyokuqala kuthotho lweengxoxo kunye nothethathethwano. Abanye abatshati abayi kulwamkela uqhawulo-mtshato kwaye baya kuzama ukulungisa izinto kodwa kungekudala okanye kamva, nje ukuba inyani iyangena, ungathetha ngento onokuyenza ukuze uqhawule umtshato ngoxolo.
4. Musa ukugalela zonke iinkcukacha ngexesha elinye
Oku kunokuba kakhulu kuwe.
Phelisa ingxoxo ngesigqibo sokuqhawula umtshato kunye nezizathu zokuba uthathe isigqibo sokuba sesona sigqibo silungileyo kusapho lwakho. Nika iqabane lakho ixesha lokuthatha kule meko kwaye ulivumele ukuba lenze into yokuba umtshato wakho uza kuphela kungekudala.
5. Amazwi arhabaxa kunye nokukhwaza akunakunceda
Unokonwaba kubudlelwane bakho kwaye ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato ngokukhawuleza kodwa usenokukhetha amagama afanelekileyo xa ucela iqabane lakho ukuba liqhawule umtshato. Amazwi arhabaxa nokungxolisa akunakuninceda nobabini. Sukuyiqala inkqubo yakho yoqhawulo-mtshato ngentiyo, oku kuyakha ingqumbo nengqumbo.Iindlela zokwahlukana zinokuba noxolo; Kufuneka siyiqale nathi.
6. Sukulivalela ngaphandle iqabane lakho ebomini bakho
Ukuxoxa nokuthetha ngenkqubo kubalulekile ngakumbi xa unabantwana. Asifuni ukuba abantwana bathathe yonke into ngexesha elinye. Kukwangcono ukuthetha ngendlela onokwenza ngayo ukuba utshintsho lube mpuluswa kangangoko kunokwenzeka.
Yintoni elandelayo?
Uxelela njani iqabane lakho ukuba ufuna ukuqhawula umtshato ukuba abakakulungeli okwangoku? Ewe, akukho mntu ukulungele ngokwenene ukuva la magama kodwa yindlela esiwaphula ngayo kubo eya kuthi ichonge ukuba uhambo lwakho loqhawulo mtshato luya kuhamba njani.
Nje ukuba ikati iphume ebhokisini kwaye nobabini nigqibe kwelokuba nilandele uqhawulo-mtshato, ngoku lixesha lokuba nisebenze kunye ukuze nifumane eyona thethwano luqhawulo mtshato lunokwenzeka kwaye ubuncinci nigcine ubudlelwane obulungileyo kubantwana benu. Uqhawulo-mtshato luthetha ukuba awusaziboni kunye njengesibini esitshatileyo kodwa usengaba ngabazali babantwana bakho.