Umxholo
- 1. Ukubonga
- 2. Umnqweno wokudibanisa
- 3. Ukwazisa ngokweemvakalelo
- 4. Umtsalane woMzimba
- 5. Ukulinganisa
- Ukuthatha kokugqibela
Xa ucinga emva kokuba 'ndiyenzile,' loo mini igcwala yimincili, uvuyo, unxunguphalo, kwanoloyiko lwento engaziwayo. Kodwa emva kolo suku lumnandi, waqala ukwakha ubomi bakho kunye. Ubunomdla wokuchitha ixesha kunye, isondo, kunye nokwenza ubuhlobo.
Emva koko kwiminyaka embalwa kamva, ufumanisa ukuba izinto zitshintshile. Uxinzelelo lobomi luye lwangena, ukuzuza ubunzima, imingeni yezempilo, kwanabantwana. Intlantsi eyayikho ekuqaleni ngoku iyadlula. Kuthatyathelwa indawo yinyani kunye noxanduva lobomi.
Kodwa ndiyakholelwa ukuba ungabubuyisa ubuhlobo bakho, kwaye ndineendlela ezintlanu ezilula zokukunceda ufike-
1. Ukubonga
Kuthetha ukuthini ukwaneliseka kuwe njengoko sijonga ukusondelelana, ixesha elisemgangathweni, isondo kunye nobuhlobo? Ndichaza ukoneliseka emtshatweni njenge ulonwabo olunyanisekileyo luzalisekiswa kwaye ngumntu omthandayo, oxabisekileyo, nothembekileyo.
- Uthando
Uthando luqulathe inqanaba elinzulu lothando, ukunconywa kunye nentlonipho. Oku kubalulekile kuba kubonelela ngesakhelo sokwanelisa, njenge sisiqulatho esisebenza esingcwele kuwe njengabantu kunye nesibini. Uthando lungaphezu kwelizwi. Yintshukumo yakho ebekiweyo ukubonisa ukhathalelo kunye nenjongo yenye.
- Ixabiso
Ixabiso lihlonipha iqabane lakho. Iqabane lakho linentsingiselo kwaye lixabisekile kuwe, kwaye kunye, nenza ubutyebi obuxabisekileyo, obungumnqophiso womtshato phakathi kwenu noThixo. Ubonisa uxabiso omnye komnye ngokwamkela omnye. Ungazami ukutshintsha omnye komnye, kodwa ujolise ingqalelo yakho kwiimpawu ezintle zomlingane kunye neempawu zakho.
Ukugxila kokubi kubangela uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo. Nangona kunjalo, ukujolisa kwiingcinga zethu kumaqabane ethu Iimpawu ezintle zisivumela ukuba sizixabise njengomntu kwaye senze indawo yokunxibelelana nezinto ezisixhalabisayo ngexesha elifanelekileyo.
- Ithemba
Ukuthembana emtshatweni kubalulekile. Ikuvumela ukuba ukhululeke, ngakumbi njengoko sizibandakanya ekuqondeni ukoneliseka kubudlelwane. Ithemba kukukwazi ukubonisa amandla akho njengeqabane kunye neqabane kuba ubonakalisa ukuba uthembekile, uthembekile kwaye uzinikele kulowo umthandayo.
2. Umnqweno wokudibanisa
Umnqweno uthi niyalangazelana. Ukulangazelela ukunxibelelana ngokwasemzimbeni, ngokwasemphefumlweni nangokomoya. Ukudibanisa kwinqanaba ngalinye lala manqanaba ivumela izibini ukuba zikhuseleke kwaye ziqonde ukuba zinokukwenza nangantoni na.
Ngenxa yoko, ibabeka ukuba babe nembono ekhululweyo kubudlelwane bezesondo. Vula ukuze unikezele kwiminqweno yokunxibelelana esikelelwe nguThixo. Ayiphiki omnye komnye ngenxa yeemvakalelo zethu kodwa idala imeko engeyongozi, ivumela enye yakho ebalulekileyo ukuba idibanise kwinqanaba elinzulu lokusondelelana.
3. Ukwazisa ngokweemvakalelo
Ukwakha ulwazi olusempilweni lweemvakalelo zakho yinto ebalulekileyo yokukhuthaza ukusondelelana, ixesha elisemgangathweni, isini, kunye nobuhlobo ngaphakathi komgaqo-sikhokelo somtshato. Iimvakalelo ezisempilweni zivumela umntu ngamnye ukuba azi ukuba uziva njani kwaye kutheni.
Oku kuyabavumela ukuba baphonononge imo yabo kwaye bangaqhushumbisi kwezinye zabo ezibalulekileyo, Ukuvumela ukuba zisebenze kwaye zingasebenzi.
Ukuqhubela phambili kuthetha ukuba uyazi kwaye ulawula iimvakalelo zakho kwaye sukuvumela imeko yakho yeemvakalelo ukuba ibe namandla phezu kwakho. Ke ngoko, ungaphendula kwisimo sakho sengqondo. Nangona kunjalo, awuyivumeli ukuba ikhule ibe ngamava abuhlungu phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho, elinokubangela ukuba uqhawulwe ngokomoya.
Ukwahlukana nomntu omthandayo kunye nokutshabalalisa nawaphina amathuba okusondelelana yile nto ndiyichazayo njengesebenzayo. Ukuphinda usebenze ngokuchasene nokusebenza kwaye kubangele amava amabi kulwalamano.
Wenza ngokuphendula kwinto oziva ngayo, ebangela ukuba imeko yakho ikulawule, endaweni yokuba ulawule iimvakalelo zakho. Oku kukhokelela ekudibaneni okungenampilo kwaye kudala ukungabinanto kunye nokusilela kobudlelwane phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho.
Ke ukuze unxibelelane kwinqanaba leemvakalelo, kuya kufuneka usebenze kwaye ungasebenzi.
4. Umtsalane woMzimba
Umtsalane ngokwasemzimbeni kuxa omnye ehendwa yindlela akhangeleka ngayo omnye. Izibini ezininzi endizibonayo zisebenzisa le meko yokuba kutheni zingenakunxibelelana namaqabane abo, ukusuka ekutyebeni ubunzima, kuhlobo lomzimba, nakwimpahla yokunxiba. Ngokwembono yezempilo, kufuneka sibe sempilweni.
Nangona kunjalo, kubudlelwane bomtshato, ndiyakholelwa ukuba ngothando, inkxalabo kunye nentlonipho, xa nisebenza kunye, kuyakuvumela ukuba ukulungisa iingxaki ezinokubakho kulwalamano. Umzekelo, ukuba umcimbi unxibe, amadoda angathenga iimpahla angathanda ukuzibona zinxiba abafazi babo, nabafazi nabo banokwenza njalo. Kodwa xa kuziwa kudidi lomzimba, sukusebenzisa unxibelelwano olubi ukudiliza iqabane lakho.
Nangona kunjalo, phendula ngokunika izisombululo okanye iindlela eziluncedo nezikhuthazayo kwiqabane lakho. Ixesha elingaphezulu imizimba yethu inokutshintsha, kodwa loo nto ayiwuchasi umnqophiso esangena kuwo kunye noThixo. Cinga ngeendlela onokuthi uthandane ngazo. Xoxa ngento onqwenela ukuyibona uhambe nayo. Ukusebenzisana kuvumela omnye komnye ukuba aviwe kwaye kudala imeko yamathuba. Ingcinga yakho yindawo entle onokuqala kuyo.
Kwividiyo engezantsi, uTomi Toluhi uthi umtsalane ukwimigangatho emine eyahlukeneyo. Iqala ngomtsalane ngokwasemzimbeni, lelo linqanaba lesiseko. Ibangela umdla. Yazi ngakumbi apha:
5. Ukulinganisa
Oko kusizisa kwindima yokudlala. Ukudlala indima kubudlelwane emtshatweni kunokuba yindlela efanelekileyo yokugcina ulonwabo kunye nokwaneliseka emtshatweni. Ndichaza indima ekufuneka ndiyidlalile njenge ukucinga ngobudlelwane bomtshato ekhuthaza izibini ukuba zigcine ubomi besondo obuphilileyo nobudlamkileyo obukhuthazayo, obunika amandla kunye nobonwabisayo.
I-Roleplay ayenzelwanga ukunyelisa okanye ukuthuka kodwa uku Yenza ithuba lokuxoxa ngendlela onokubuphucula ngayo ubomi bakho ngokwesondo loo nto iyenza ibangele kwaye ingxamiseke.
Ukuthatha kokugqibela
Ukuqonda ukuba ukusondelelana kuthetha ukuba nomdla omnye komnye kubalulekile kumtshato. Ukubuyisela ukusondelana emtshatweni wakho kunokwenzeka kwaye kufuna ukuzibophelela, utyalomali, kunye nokomeleza.
Zibophezele 'kwinto endiyenzayo' nayo yonke into eyimeleyo, tyala ixesha elifanelekileyo lokwakha ubudlelwane, kwaye uqinise isimo sakho sothando, ixabiso, kunye nentembelo yokudala ubudlelwane obusempilweni, obunyanisekileyo nohlala ixesha elide. Ngenxa yoko, uya kumisela ithuba lexesha elisemgangathweni, isini kunye nobuhlobo.