Umxholo
Ngaba ukwi-career ekhulayo okanye ekhulayo kuba ubeka umgudu kuyo? Cinga ngendlela ophumelele ngayo kule ndawo yobomi bakho. Uninzi lwabantu abagqiba ubudlelwane lubalulekile ngokwaneleyo ukuba bangatshata banokuthi ubudlelwane yenye yezona zinto zibalulekileyo kubo. Xa singazenzi ngokungqinelana neenqobo zethu zokuziphatha asiva kamnandi ngathi, le nto ihlala ityhala izibini okanye abantu ukuba baye kunyanga. Into ehlekisayo kukuba uninzi lwezibini luphumelele kakhulu kwezinye iindawo zobomi bazo, kodwa khange lucinge ngokufaka ezo zithako ezifanayo ukuze ziphumelele kubudlelwane bazo.
Kutheni sityeshela ubudlelwane bethu?
Kwiinyanga ezili-18 ukuya kwezi-24 zobudlelwane akudingeki ukuba wenze umgudu omkhulu. Ubudlelwane bulula kuba ingqondo yethu igcwele ngamanzi e-neurochemicals asenza ukuba "sikhanuke" omnye komnye; Esi sigaba sobudlelwane kubhekiswa kuso njengesigaba semida. Kweli nqanaba lobudlelwane, unxibelelwano, umnqweno, kunye nokuvana kunokuba lula ngokulula. Emva koko sinomdla kunye nemitshato egcina isindiza phezulu. Nje ukuba lonke uthuli luzinze kwaye nengqondo yethu itshintshele kwimfihlo ye-neurochemicals yokuncamathisela, ngesiquphe sizifumana sisebenza kubudlelwane ekusenokwenzeka ukuba bekungafuneki ukuba senze umgudu omkhulu ukuza kuthi ga ngoku. Ukuba isibini sithathe isigqibo sokuba nabantwana, le nyani iza ngokukhawuleza kwaye ibenzima. Siqala ukutshintshela kwi-autopilot, oko kunokuthetha ukuba senza izinto ezendeleyo esele sinazo zomtshato. I-Schemas zizakhelo zangaphakathi esizifumeneyo ngexa lethu elidlulileyo ezinegalelo ekuqondeni kwethu ukuba into ithetha ntoni okanye imele ntoni: okuthetha ukuba uninzi lwethu luqala ukudlala uhlobo lomtshato esithe sawubona sinabo abazali bethu. Ngaba sifunde ngokubukela abazali bethu bethetha okanye baphathana ngendlela ethile? Ngaba sibabukele bengakhathalelananga okanye bathatha inxaxheba kwimisebenzi yenoveli yokuvuselela imvakalelo yenkanuko kwakhona? Ngaphandle komtshato abazali bethu abayimodeli kuthi, sifunda phi ukugcina ubudlelwane okanye umtshato uqinile, esikolweni, iklasi? Ngamanye amaxesha sibona ubudlelwane kumgama esifuna ukufana nawo, mhlawumbi ootatomkhulu noomakhulu, umtshato womhlobo, isibini esikwiTV, kodwa asisoloko sibona izithako ezenza ukuba siphumelele. Ngapha koko, ukungahoywa, ngelixa kuhlala kungakhathalelwanga kubudlelwane kuba kungacingelwa ukuba kuyingozi njengokuxhatshazwa, kunokubangela amanxeba anzulu ngokwengqondo kunezinye iindlela zokuphathwa gadalala. Ukuba siziva sityeshelwe ngokwasemphefumlweni okanye ngokwesondo kubudlelwane bethu, kwaye ngakumbi ukuba sikhe sakhatywa ngabazali, oku kungathumela imiyalezo eyenzakalisayo njengeemfuno zethu azinamsebenzi, okanye asinamsebenzi. Ngenxa yokuba ukwenzakala kokungahoywa akubonakali, imiqondiso ihlala ifihlakele njengokuthula okanye ukuzikhusela / ukuphepha- okungabonakali kakhulu kukuphazamiseka (okanye amava amaninzi) yokungabinalo olo nxibelelwano kubudlelwane.
Fumana uncedo ngaphambi kwexesha
Amaqabane ahlala ehlehlisa unyango de kube sekupheleni kwabo, bancitshisiwe kukungakhathalelwa okanye phantse kwenziwe ngolwalamano. Amaxesha amaninzi ayikuko ukungabikho kwesakhono okanye ukufuna ukuba ubudlelwane busebenze, kukuba esi sibini besingenazo izixhobo kunye nolwazi lokusebenzisa ngokuzimisela umgudu nokusebenza kuwo. Baye bafumana ulindelo olungelolokwenyani (mhlawumbi ngokubukela olo lwalamano luqinisekileyo kude) ukuba bayathandana ngokwaneleyo ngokwaneleyo ukuba kungasebenza. Endaweni yokuba, phantse ngokungazi bebesebenza bevumela ubudlelwane ukuba buwohloke, ngelixa iinzame zigalelwa abantwana, umsebenzi, indlu, ukomelela kunye neenjongo zempilo. Kodwa xa sicinga ngemibuzo enje, "Ufuna ukuthini kubantwana bakho, kubazukulwana bakho, okanye ngokwakho ekupheleni kobomi bakho malunga nolunye lwezona zinto zibalulekileyo, ezinde kakhulu, obukhe wanazo?" Zonke izinto ezenzeka ngesiquphe ziyavela kwaye siziva sinongxamiseko ukuze sisebenze kuyo, sisoyika impendulo ithi, “Ewe ndizamile, bendixakekile, bendinento eninzi eqhubekayo, besivele sikhukhuluke ngaphandle ndiyaqonda. ”
Ukuba uyawuxabisa umtshato wakho, sebenzela kuwo. Ukuba awazi ukuba uqale ngaphi, cela uncedo. Kuya kufuneka uyazi imigangatho yakho kubudlelwane, uyihlole, kwaye uhlakulele amandla kunye nenkuthazo yokuyigcina yomelele- kanye njengokuba ubenzile ukuze uphumelele kwikhondo lakho lomsebenzi.