Umxholo
- Nguwe lo?
- Oku kwenzeka kubomi babafazi abaninzi
- Ngaba unyamalele?
- Ukuphulukana nolwalamano lwakho yeyona nto ilula ukuyenza
Ndigcina njani ekulahlekelweni ndim kobu budlelwane? Ndingubani ngoku, nditshatile? Imibuzo uninzi lwabasetyhini olusokola ngokufihlakeleyo, xa sele bekwimeko yokuzibophelela okanye xa betshatile. Ngaba ungazichonga kule nto, uphila imihla ngemihla, ukhangela isazisi sakho, ukhangela ukuba wawuphi ngaphambi kobudlelwane okanye ngaphambi kokuba utshate, ukhangela iimpendulo, ukhangela elaa candelo lakho uziva ukuba ngoku lilahlekile, wena okholelwa ukuba ufile.
Nguwe lo?
Ubuphumile, ubuthanda iimuvi, uthanda ukuhamba, ukuthanda ukuhlala nabahlobo kunye nosapho, ukuthanda ukuya kwi-spa, ukuthanda ukufunda, ukuthanda ukusebenza ngokuzithandela, ukuthanda imibutho yakho yenkonzo, ukuthanda izinto ezininzi; ubuzazi izinto ozithandayo nongazithandiyo, ubuyinkosikazi yokuzikhathalela, unengqondo eyeyakho, unelizwi, kwaye unesazisi sakho. Kwenzeka ntoni kuye, kwenzeka ntoni kuwe? Uyaphi, uyeke nini ukuhlala, uthathe isigqibo sokuyeka nini wena ngenxa yobudlelwane okanye umtshato? Ngeliphi ixesha ulahlekelwe ngumbono wokuba ungubani, uyeke nini ukuba nguwe, kwaye uyeke nini ukuzibonakalisa ebomini bakho.
Oku kwenzeka kubomi babafazi abaninzi
Oku kwenzeka kubantu basetyhini abaye bayeke ukuhlala xa sele benobudlelwane okanye emva kokuba betshatile; abasetyhini abazifumanayo, bezifuna kuba belahlekile kubudlelwane babo.
Ngokuka-Beverly Engel, ugqirha wezengqondo kunye nombhali wencwadi ethi Ukumthanda Ngaphandle Kokulahlekelwa Nguwe, abafazi abaphulukana nobudlelwane babo "nguNkosikazi onyamalalayo", "umfazi othanda ukuncama ubuqu bakhe, iinkolelo zakhe, umsebenzi wakhe, abahlobo bakhe, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha usempilweni nanini na xa ethandana. ”
Ngaba unyamalele?
Ulahlekelwe kukudibana nomntu onguye, into oyithandayo okanye ongayithandiyo, uyekile imisebenzi oyithandayo, imisebenzi ekuzisela uvuyo kunye nokuzaliseka, kwaye uyekile ukuphila ubomi kwaye awunaxesha lakho, usapho okanye abahlobo. ?
Kungenxa yokuba usebudlelwaneni akuthethi ukuba akufuneki ubonwabele ubomi, akufuneki uzive okanye wenze ngokungathi ubomi buphelile, oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka unikezele ngezinto ezikwenza wonwabe kwaye zikuzisele ulonwabo, akunyanzelekanga ukuba ulahle inkanuko yakho, umdla, iinjongo, okanye amaphupha ngenxa yokuba usebudlelwaneni okanye utshatile. Okukhona uzincama, kokukhona ulahlekelwa nguwe kwaye ekugqibeleni uya kuqala ukucaphukisa lo mntu uba nguye kwaye uya kuzisola ngokungaphili ubomi.
Ukuphulukana nolwalamano lwakho yeyona nto ilula ukuyenza
Nangona kunjalo, akunakwenzeka ukugcina ukwenza oko; kwaye ungazilahli, ndiyakukhuthaza ukuba uthathele ingqalelo oku kulandelayo:
Zazi ukuba ungubani -Ungabuvumeli ubudlelwane ukuba buchaze wena, ube nesazisi sakho esahlukileyo, sukuzixakekisa ngolwalamano olulibaleyo ngawe. Ubudlelwane abukwenzi ukuba ungubani, uzisa ubukhethekileyo kulwalamano, kwaye uyenze ibe yile nto uyiyo.
Thatha inxaxheba kwizinto ozithandayo -Hlala ubandakanyeka kwizinto othanda ukuzenza kwaye ungayeki ukonwabela ubomi kuba usebudlelwaneni. Kubalulekile ukuba ube nezinto onomdla kuzo kunye nezinto ozenzayo ngaphandle kobudlelwane, ukwenza njalo kuya kukugcina ungaxhomekeki kwiqabane lakho ukufezekisa iimfuno zakho zonke.
Fumana iindlela zokubuyisela eluntwini -Nkxaso kwaye uthathe inxaxheba ngokuzithandela kwinjongo yakho oyithandayo. Ukunceda abanye kuya kuyanelisa intswelo yakho yokuba ngumntu, ukukhulisa ukuzithemba kwakho, kukwenza uzive unombulelo, unombulelo, wonwabe, kwaye unike ulwaneliseko ebomini.
Hlala uqhagamshele nabahlobo kunye nosapho -Unganikezeli okanye ungaluhoyi usapho kunye nabahlobo bakho, ngoku ukuba usebudlelwaneni. Qhubeka ukondla obu budlelwane, uchithe ixesha nabo, kwaye uqhubeke ubaxhasa xa kunokwenzeka. Musa ukubatyeshela abo bebekhona ngenxa yakho, ngaphambi kobudlelwane. Kuphilile ukuba nabahlobo ngaphandle kobudlelwane.
Ziqhelanise nokuzikhathalela -Cwangcisa ixesha lakho, nokuba kunye neentombi zakho okanye wedwa usuku e-spa, ukubaleka kwamantombazana, okanye ixesha nje lodwa lokucinga, ukuhlaziya kunye nokuhlaziya. Ukuzinakekela kubalulekile.
Sukuyeka ukuba nguwe -Hlala unyanisekile kwimilinganiselo yakho kunye neenkolelo kwaye ungalalanisi, uzincame, okanye ungayihoyi. Xa uyeka amaxabiso kunye neenkolelo zakho kubudlelwane, ulahlekelwa nguwe. Sukuyeka ukuba nguwe, kwaye ungaze uyeke ukubonakalisa ebomini bakho.
Thetha uviwe - Yazi ukuba unelizwi; iingcinga zakho, izimvo, iimvakalelo kunye nokukhathazeka kubalulekile. Sukuthula ungavumi ngezimvo okanye iingxelo, xa usazi ukuba awuvumelani. Ziveze, uze uphakame uthethe into okholelwa kuyo.