Umxholo
Usenokuzibuza ukuba ungamxolela njani umyeni wakho ngokukuvisa kabuhlungu. Ukuba awukwenzi oko, uyakuba ngaphandle kwabafazi abatshatileyo. Umtshato ngaphandle kweempazamo uyintsomi, masikhuphe loo nto endleleni. Kwaye nokuba yinto ayithethileyo okanye ayenzileyo, nokuba incinci okanye ayilunganga, akukho nto incinci ukubuza lo mbuzo. Ngoba? Ilula - awuyi kufika naphina ngaphandle kwayo.
Kodwa, kuba uyazibuza ukuba ungalukhupha njani uxolelo, ngokuqinisekileyo sele uyiqondile le nyani. Emtshatweni, kuqhelekile ukuthukwa, ukungahlonitshwa, ukungaxatyiswa, ukwenzakaliswa nangayiphi na indlela yesigidi. Ngelishwa, oko kuza nenyani yokuba wabelana ngalo lonke ixesha lakho nazo zonke iingcinga zakho nomnye umntu. Uzivulela ithuba lokuba wenzakale. Kodwa, ukuba siwujonga ngolu hlobo umtshato, kuvakala ngathi sisikimu esibi sokungcungcuthekisa. Nangona kunjalo, nokuba ubuhlungu ngoku kwaye ungakufumani kuwe ukuxolela, uyazi ukuba ayiyonyani. Yinto yokuba yenziwe ngabantu ababini, bobabini baneempazamo kunye nobuthathaka. Ngenxa yoko, uninzi lwabasetyhini bayangcatshwa, bayathukwa, batyhalelwe kude, baxokiswa, bahlaziswa, abaziwa, bayakhohliswa ...
Ngoku, masibuze umbuzo wokuba kutheni kufuneka uzixolele izinto ezinjalo kwindawo yokuqala kwakhona.
Uxolelo luyakukhulula
Uxolelo yeyona nto iyakukukhulula, ikukhulule kumthwalo wokuba lixhoba, wokuthwala umthwalo wokona, wentiyo nengqumbo ehambisana nokubamba umsindo. Kuqhelekile ukuba ube sentlungwini ngenxa yokungcatshwa. Kwaye enye into iqhelekile -ukuncamathela kumsindo wethu. Asinakuyiqonda njengoko siyifuna ngokwenyani (hayi, siyidinga) ukuba ihambe, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha kuyenzeka ukuba sibambelele kwiimvakalelo zethu zokwenzakala ngenxa yokuba, ngokumangalisayo, zisinika imvakalelo yokhuseleko. Xa sisentlungwini ngenxa yento eyenzekileyo, kuxhomekeke kwabanye ukuyilungisa. Kuxhomekeke kumyeni wethu ukuyenza ngcono, njengoko inguye oyibangeleyo. Sifuna kuphela ukufumana iinzame zakhe ukusenza sizive siphile kwaye sonwabe kwakhona.
Okwangoku, oku ngamanye amaxesha akwenzeki, ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi. Akazami, akaphumeleli, akakhathali, okanye akukho nto ilunge ngokwaneleyo ukulungisa umonakalo. Ke, sishiyeke sinenzondo. Asifuni ukuxolela, kuba kukuphela kovalo lwethu lokulawula okwenzekayo. Khange sikhethe ukukhathazeka ngoluhlobo, kodwa sinokukhetha ukubambelela kumsindo wethu.
Uninzi luya kuthi uxolelo linyathelo lokuqala lokuphilisa. Okwangoku, ngokwenza, oku akunjalo. Ke, sukuziva unyanzelekile ukuba uqale inkqubo yakho yokuphilisa (kwaye ulungise umtshato wakho ukuba yile nto ukhetha ukuyenza) ngenqanaba elikhulu njengokuxolela kwangoko. Sukuba nexhala, ekugqibeleni uza kufika. Kodwa kuninzi, ukuxolela ayilinyathelo lokuqala. Ihlala ingowokugqibela. Ngapha koko, ukuxolela akuyomfuneko ekwakheni umtshato wakho kwakhona (okanye ukuzithemba kwakho kunye nethemba) kwaye kuza ngakumbi njengesiqhamo sokuphilisa ngokwakho.
Philisa wena kuqala
Inyathelo lokuqala lokudala umhlaba ochumileyo woxolelo kukuya kuzo zonke iimvakalelo ohlangabezana nazo, kwaye uthathe ixesha lakho ngokwenza njalo. Kufuneka uziphilise phambi kokuba ukwazi ukuxolela. Unelungelo lokudlula kukothuka, ukukhanyela, ukudakumba, usizi, umsindo phambi kokuba ufumane indlela yokudibanisa oko kwenzekileyo kumbono wakho omtsha kwaye ukhule ngokwamava. Emva koku, ungaqala ukulungisa ubudlelwane bakho, ukuxhuma kwakhona, kunye nokuseka ukuthembana kwakhona. Kwaye emva koko unokulungela uxolelo oluyinyani.
Ukuba ayizi lula, khumbula- ukuxolela akuthetheleli ukonwaba komyeni wakho. Ayikuko ukungayikhathaleli into awayeyenzile kwaye ungammangaleli ngezenzo zakhe. Endaweni yoko, kukuyeka umnqweno ovuthayo wokumohlwaya, ukuthwala inzondo njengebheji yembeko, nokuba nenqala. Kuxolelo, kuya kufuneka uyiyeke yonke loo nto nokuba khange ayicele. Ngoba? Ukuxolela yindlela esempilweni engenakuthelekiswa nanto yokulawula okwenzekayo kuwe. Xa uxolela, awukho kwinceba yezenzo zabanye. Xa uxolela, uthatha ulawulo kwiimvakalelo zakho, nakubomi bakho. Ayisiyo (nje) into omenzela yona, okanye evela kububele bentliziyo yakho- ikwayinto ozenzela yona. Ngumcimbi wentlalo-ntle yakho kunye nempilo yakho.