Umxholo
- Kuthekani ngolonwabo lwakhe?
- Akazange alindele ukuba ubudlelwane bunyibilike
- Sobabini sanegalelo ekusileleni kobudlelwane
- Into ebalulekileyo ekufuneka uyijongile ziimpawu zobuntu
- Ngaphambi kokuba ulungise ingxaki, kufuneka uyiqonde
- Ekupheleni kosuku, amaxabiso ekwabelwana ngawo ngawona abaluleke kakhulu
- Nantoni na okholelwa ukuba iyinyani ngobomi bakho iba yinyani
Emva kweeveki zokuhlukumeza kunye nokuzikhathaza ngokwasengqondweni, ekugqibeleni ndasifumana isibindi sokuphelisa ukubandakanyeka kwam kwiiveki ezintathu, ubudlelwane beminyaka esi-8.
Ndiyakhumbula mhla ndayibiza ukuba iyayeka, kwakusemva nje kokuba uSandy ehlasele isiXeko saseNew York kwaye etshabalalise amakhaya abaninzi, kubandakanya nosapho lwam.
Ndikhumbula ukuvuka ngale ntsasa kwaye into ethile ngaphakathi kwam itshintsha, kwaye yonke into endiyivileyo kukuba "Inna, ngekhe uqhubeke nokuphila ngale ndlela, alisoze libekho ixesha elililo, kufanelekile ukuba wonwabe, yenza nje."
Kuthekani ngolonwabo lwakhe?
Ukonwaba kwakhe kwakubalulekile kum kodwa ukuqonda ukuba ulonwabo lwam lwalubaluleke ngokufanayo, kwaye bekungafanelekanga ukuba ndincame eyam ngenxa yakhe yeza kuphela emva kweminyaka emininzi sikunye.
Ukumkhokelela ekubeni acinge ukuba kuya kubakho ulonwabo ngonaphakade kwakukude
mbi ngaphezu kwayo nayiphi na enye into.
Ndacinga ixesha elide kwaye ndaqonda ukuba ndenza sobabini ubabalo olukhulu ngokwaphula ukubandakanyeka.
Ngekuphele ukuba yenzeke kwangoko kunokuba yenzeke kamva. Yonke into endandihlala ndicinga ngayo "kulungile ukuzophula izinto, kulungile ... kwaye uyakulunga, hlala apho" Kwaye ke sidibene kunye namazwi athi "Andonwabanga, andinakuyenza oku kwakhona ”kuphume nje.
Ndandimcaphukela umntu endandinguye kodwa intuthuzelo yokuqhelana nokoyika utshintsho lwandishiya
ukuba semngciphekweni wokuzenzisa kwabanye kunye nakwam ukuba ndonelisekile.
Ngokwasemphefumlweni nasengqondweni "bendiqhawule umtshato" ubudlelwane bam kwiminyaka emininzi eyadlulayo kodwa amandla oku
jonga iziphumo zezenzo zam kuphela kuphume mhla ndathembisa ngomtshato.
Kwakungathi kukho into etshintshileyo emzimbeni wam kwaye yandinyanzela ukuba ndiphinde ndihlolisise ubomi bam.
Ukwamkela inyani yokuba ndandilusizi kwaye ndingonwabanga kwiminyaka engama-28 ubudala kwaba buhlungu ngakumbi kwaye
Imihla ngemihla imihla ngemihla.
Inxalenye enye yokugcinwa kwam ndifunda amabinzana kwinqaku endikhe ndalifunda kwi-Business Insider kwizinto ezi-5 zabantu abazisolayo ngazo ekufeni kwabo. "Ndinqwenela ukuba ndibenesibindi sokuphila ubomi obunyani kum," ndinqwenela ukuba ndibenesibindi sokubonisa iimvakalelo zam "" Ukonwaba kuhlala kukhetho. " elinye icala lam lahlala licinga “Luza kucinga ntoni usapho lwam ukuba ndiyaphula umtshato?” “Baza kucinga ntoni abanye abantu ngam?”
Ndandingumfazi obukekayo, ofundileyo “Ndize njani apha?”
Akazange alindele ukuba ubudlelwane bunyibilike
Wayecinga ukuba ukusebenza kwakhe ngamandla kuyancomeka kwaye akazange abuqonde ubushushu besakhiwo kum okanye ingqibelelo esisahlukanisa.
Sobabini siyityeshele imiqondiso (ebikhona kwangoko kubudlelwane) kwaye
bakholelwa ukuba izipho zinokuthatha indawo yobukho.
Kodwa, ukutsho nje okuncinci, bendikruqukile zizizathu zakhe. Ndaziva ndililolo kwaye ndinomsindo ixesha elide kwaye inzondo yakha iminyaka eliqela ekhokelela kubomi obufanayo.
Ngamanye amaxesha bendizibuza ukuba "ingaba uyandiqaphela na ukuba ndilapha?" Ukuqhawulwa konxibelelwano phakathi kwethu kuye kwaba yinto enganyamezelekiyo.
Jonga kwakhona:
Sobabini sanegalelo ekusileleni kobudlelwane
Ngamnye wethu wayeqwalasele kwaye azinikele kwindawo enye yobomi; kuAlex yayisakha ikhondo lakhe lomsebenzi kwaye kum yayijolise kakhulu kumandla kuAlex kwaye ayonelanga kwiimfuno zam.
Sobabini asifumananga ntsalela ifunekayo ukugcina ubudlelwane. Ndizamile ukuzibamba
kuye, kodwa indlela yam ebambekayo yamkhokelela ekubeni abuyele endaweni yakhe yokusebenza.
Uphephe ukungqubana kwaye wakhetha ukusebenza iiyure ezinde njengenye indlela yokunxibelelana
malunga nokuxabana kwethu.
Xa sinxibelelana, nto leyo ibingafane yenzeke, sichaze iimvakalelo zethu ezingalunganga
ngeendlela ezenzakalisayo kwaye babekek 'ityala omnye komnye.
Sobabini singene kubudlelwane kunye nokumiselwa kwangaphambili kokulindelweyo okungekho ngqiqweni, ngaloo ndlela kusenza siphoxeke sisiphumo.
Izisa kum umbuzo wam wokuqala, kutheni le nto amadoda nabafazi abaphumeleleyo benaye
ubunzima obunje bokukhuthaza nokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo?
Ukuqonda imiceli mngeni yobudlelwane bokuthandana nendoda ephumeleleyo, okanye ukuqonda imiceli mngeni yokuthandana nomntu oqeqeshiweyo, kubalulekile ukuba ujonge imvelaphi yosapho.
Uninzi lwe "go-getters" lukhulele kwiintsapho apho iindlela zokuziphatha ezinamandla zomelezwa kwaye zixabiswa ngaphezulu kwayo yonke enye into.
"Ukuba uphumelele ngempumelelo, uyaphumelela ebomini" yayibonakaliswe esemncinci, ngaloo ndlela ivumela umntu ukuba akholelwe ukuba ngokufezekisa kuza kwamkelwa ebomini.
Into ebalulekileyo ekufuneka uyijongile ziimpawu zobuntu
Uninzi lwabantu abaphumeleleyo baya kugalela onke amandla abo kwiminqweno yabo, bethatha umngcipheko kwaye bangaze banikezele.
Ukomelela kwabo okwakhelwe ngaphakathi kungenxa yokucinga okuqinisekileyo, nokuba yeyiphi na imiqobo eza kubo.
Ngokwendalo babonisa ukuzithemba kwaye ziinkokeli.
Okwesibini, kutheni le nto amadoda nabafazi bengaphumeleli kakhulu abakwaziyo
Ukujongana nayo nayiphi na ingxaki emsebenzini lungisa ingxaki kubudlelwane babo?
Kutheni le nto ubudlelwane okanye umtshato kunye nempumelelo yomsebenzi zihambelana ngokukodwa kubo?
Ngaphambi kokuba ulungise ingxaki, kufuneka uyiqonde
Amadoda nabafazi abaninzi abaphumeleleyo bachitha lonke ixesha labo nabantu abathanda izinto ezifanayo kwaye ke abayijongi ngokungafaniyo nemiba.
Omnye wemiceli mngeni abajamelene nawo ubuntu obunamabhongo kukuba banexesha elinzima kakhulu lokwahlula phakathi kokungxamisekileyo nokubalulekileyo.
Kwezi zinto zokuhamba, yonke into ingxamisekile, kwaye yonke into ibalulekile enxulumene nomsebenzi.
Nje ukuba yenzeke, aba bantu baya kuhlala begxile kulo msebenzi, kwaye balibale malunga
ubudlelwane. Kodwa inye into esinokuphikisana ngayo kukuba lonke ubudlelwane budinga ingqalelo,
ukuzibophelela, umonde, kunye namandla okuhlala ukuze uphumelele.
Inkqubo yotshintsho ayifuni kuphela ulwazi kodwa isicwangciso sendlela onokutshintsha ngayo.
Kubalulekile ukuba uzazi ngaphambi kokuba uthathe isigqibo sokungena kubudlelwane.
Nje ukuba amaxabiso akho, iimfuno zeemvakalelo, kunye neepateni zothando zichongiwe emva koko kukuthunywa
yokufumana uthando lokwenene kunokwenzeka.
Ekupheleni kosuku, amaxabiso ekwabelwana ngawo ngawona abaluleke kakhulu
Nokuba yeyiphi na indoda efuna iingcebiso malunga nendlela yokuthandana nomntu ozimeleyo, indoda ethandana nomfazi ophumeleleyo osokola neengxaki zobudlelwane, okanye umfazi othandana nendoda ephumeleleyo kwaye esokola ukuziva eqinisekisiwe- konke kubila kumaxabiso ekwabelwana ngawo kunye nokuzamkela .
Ndifundile ukuba sonke sizalwe sinezipho kwaye umsebenzi wethu kuphela kukwamkela le nyaniso,
kholelwa kwaye uthembe ukuba siza kufumana ubomi bothando esibunqwenelayo.
Yamkela ii-quirks zakho, iziphene zakho kunye nenyani yokuba ubomi buyinto eguqukayo ngamanye amaxesha.
Nantoni na okholelwa ukuba iyinyani ngobomi bakho iba yinyani
Ukuba iinkolelo zakho ngawe azisebenzi kuwe, unokuzitshintsha.
Uyazibuza ukuba njani. Ngokuphinda uvuselele iipateni zakho zokucinga.
Thatha ixesha lokujonga indlela onokuthi uphucule ngayo, uzise ulonwabo ebomini bakho nakubantu abakufutshane.
Kubalulekile ukuthatha ixesha lokuzijonga kuba enyanisweni, siyoyika ukuba
thina.
Ukubonisa iimpazamo zethu, bonisa indlela esivakalelwa ngayo, eyona nto siyifunayo, sonke sisoyika ukwaliwa.
Kude kube sijonge ukuba singoobani, ubomi abunakuze butshintshe, kwaye ulonwabo esilufunayo alusoze luze.
Ekugqibeleni, akukho mntu uya kuphoxeka ngaphezu kwakho ukuba awuphili obona bomi bumnandi onokuphila. Hayi abazali bakho, hayi amaqabane akho. Ukuba ubudlelwane obudlulileyo buye abayi kuba yile nto ubuyilindele, ke thabatha izifundo kuyo kwaye uye phambili.