Umxholo
UGqr. UJohn noJulie Gottman baxoxa ngombono wentsingiselo ekwabelwana ngayo emtshatweni. Intsingiselo ekwabelwana ngayo yile nto isibini siyila kunye, kwaye njengayo yonke intsingiselo, ixhomekeke kwiimpawu. Imizekelo yeesimboli ibandakanya ekhaya, isithethe, kunye isidlo sangokuhlwa, kunye nentsingiselo yesimboli eluncedo inokufunyanwa ngombuzo, "Lithetha ntoni ikhaya kuwe?" Ewe, ikhaya lingaphezulu kakhulu kweendonga nophahla lwendlu; ikhaya liqulathe kwaye likondle onke amathemba ethu onxibelelwano, ukhuseleko, ukhuseleko nothando. Ikwayindawo yokusebenza yosapho, nokuba sisibini okanye usapho olunabantwana.
Ukufakela intsingiselo eyahlukileyo kwiimpawu ezibalulekileyo kunokubangela ukungavisisani emtshatweni, ngakumbi kuba intsingiselo yayo ihlala ingaziwa okanye ichazwa. Cinga ngomyeni okhulele kwigumbi elingaphakathi edolophini njengokuphela komntwana kumama ongenaqabane. Ikhaya lakhe ubukhulu becala yayiyindawo yokulala, yokuhlamba, neyokutshintsha iimpahla, kwaye uninzi lwezinto ezenziwayo kusapho nakwintsapho, kubandakanya ukutya kunye nomsebenzi wesikolo owenzelwa ngaphandle kwendlu. Le ndoda itshata umfazi okhulele kusapho olukhulu ebesidla kunye ngokuhlwa ekhaya, ehlala elandelwa umdlalo wekhadi okanye ingxoxo emnandi ngeziganeko zosuku. Xa batshata, enye yeengxaki zokuqala abadibana nazo ngumnqweno wabo owahlukileyo wokuhlala ekhaya ngokuhlwa.
Umzekelo: Ukuthatha uhambo
Ukuthatha uhambo yinto endihlala ndiyithanda. Ndithanda kakhulu ukuhamba ebusuku kakhulu, xa kungekho zimoto zihamba ngesantya kwisitrato sethu esixakekileyo, kwaye akufuneki ndiphephe izinja ezihambayo okanye abamelwane abafuna ukuncokola. Andihlali nabantu, kodwa ndiyakonwabela ukuhamba njengexesha lam elithuleyo lokucinga. Kum, ukusondelelana kobumnyama kunye nokuzola sisimemo esinamandla sokunxibelelana kwakhona nam. Umyeni wam, kwelinye icala, uyisidudla ongakonwabeliyo ukuzibonakalisa kwakhe kwaye ofumanisa ukuba uhamba kancinci. Ukuthiyile ukuhamba!
Ekuqaleni komtshato wethu ndazibona ndinomsindo kwaye ndikrakra ukuba akazukuhamba nam. Xa ndandikwazi ukumbeka ityala lokuhamba nam, amava ayengemnandanga kuba wayengafuni ukubakhona kwaye ukuhamba kwethu kwakudla ngokujika kube yingxabano. Ndithathe isigqibo sokuba ayilunganga ukumcela ukuba ahambe nam, ndiyeke ukwenza njalo. Ndiphinde ndavavanya ukuba kutheni ukuhamba kwakhe nam kubaluleke kangaka. Ndifumanise ukuba ukwabelana ngesilayi esincinci sexesha elisondeleyo kunye nendawo ekupheleni kweentsuku zethu yayiluphawu olubalulekileyo kum-uphawu lokudibana. Xa umyeni wam ekhethe ukungahambi nam, ndiyitolike njengokwala unxibelelwano mna, kwaye yandicaphukisa. Nje ukuba ndibone ukuba ukungabinamnqweno wokuhamba nam akunanto yakwenza nokwaliwa kwam okanye umtshato wethu, ndaye ndazinza ndedwa.
Kumnandi ngokwaneleyo, ngoku ukuba andisamtyhaleli, umyeni wam undijoyina kakhulu ngokuhlwa xa sihamba. Kuye, kubonisa ukuzivocavoca kunye nethuba lokucinga kunye nam, kodwa kum, iphendula ukulangazelela kwam ukudibanisa nomyeni wam. Ukusukela oko sithethile ngayo, sidale intsingiselo entsha, ekwabelwana ngayo ekuhambeni kwethu-ixesha apho siyazi ukuba sinokuthembela omnye komnye ukuba simamele, sixhasane, kwaye "apho" omnye komnye.
Yise kude
Abantu abatshatileyo kufuneka baphonononge intsingiselo yeesimboli zabo ngemibuzo embalwa elula: “Lithini ibali lokuba kutheni kubaluleke kangaka? Idlale ntoni le minyaka yakho yokukhula? ” Yintoni eyona nto uyinqwenela kangaka? ” Sebenzisa incoko yababini, izibini zinokufunda ngakumbi malunga kunye nendlela yokuhlangabezana neemfuno zomnye nomnye. Esi sixhobo siluncedo kakhulu ekubuyiseleni imeko yobuhlobo kunye "nobomi," Sisiseko somtshato esomeleleyo.