Umxholo
- Luyintoni unxibelelwano?
- 1. Buza imibuzo evulelekileyo
- 2. Ukuphulaphula ngenyameko
- 3. Yiva
- 4. Ukunyaniseka kubalulekile
- 5. Unxibelelwano olungenamlomo
- 6. Indlela ezimbini-esitratweni
- 7. Hlala ugxile
- Isiphelo
Ukuba sothandweni kuyinto emnandi, yamava omlingo rhoqo. Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha, sihlangabezana neemeko zokungaqondani kunye neengxabano, kwaye unxibelelwano lunokuba ngumceli mngeni. Ukuba oku kuvakala kuqhelekile, uya kuzifumana ezi ngcebiso zokuNxibelelana okungcono kweZibini.
Uqale into ebonakala ngathi incoko elula malunga nento ethile kunye neqabane lakho, kodwa ikwazile ngandlela thile ukuba iphume kulawulo kwaye ikhule ibe yingxabano enkulu. Ukuba le meko ikhalisa intsimbi, kuya kufuneka wazi ukuba awuwedwa.
Abantu abaninzi banamava olu hlobo lweengxaki zonxibelelwano zababini ubuncinci kube kanye kubudlelwane babo kuba abanazo izakhono zonxibelelwano ezigqwesileyo.
Ubudlelwane buhle xa nithandana, nizonwabise njalo njalo, kodwa akukho namnye owakha wathi zilula. Umcimbi ophambili kubudlelwane, nokuba busondele okanye buhlobo, kukuba abahlulwanga kwihlabathi liphela.
Zenziwe ngabantu ababini abazisa iimvakalelo ezahlukeneyo, amava adlulileyo, amabali kunye nolindelo. Inokuba intle kwaye ityebise ubudlelwane, kodwa ikwanokukhokelela kwiingxaki zonxibelelwano ezimbalwa. Yiyo loo nto kubalulekile ukuba wabelane kwaye uxoxe ngezinto ngokufanelekileyo neqabane lakho.
Abantu abaninzi abahoyi kangako kunxibelelwano kuba bakholelwa ukuba bathetha ngokwaneleyo namaqabane abo. Kodwa kukho umahluko phakathi kokuthetha nokunxibelelana! Ungathetha nangantoni na neqabane lakho - abantwana, umsebenzi, iingxaki zemoto, izicwangciso zesidlo sangokuhlwa, imozulu njalo njalo!
Oko, nangona kunjalo, kuthetha ukuba uxoxa ngezinto eziqhelekileyo kunye nezingabalulekanga zemihla ngemihla, kodwa awuthethi ngezinto ezibalulekileyo.
Ukuba ufuna ukuhlala ubudlelwane obunempumelelo kwaye bonwabile, kuya kufuneka uqonde ukubaluleka kwe Unxibelelwano lweZibini. Unxibelelwano olugqwesileyo yeyona nto ibalulekileyo ayisiyiyo eyabantu abatshatileyo kuphela kodwa nobudlelwane ngokubanzi - nabantu osebenza nabo, izihlobo, abazali bonke baxhomekeke kumgangatho wonxibelelwano.
Namhlanje, siza kwabelana ngezinye zeengcebiso malunga nendlela yokunxibelelana ngokubambisana. Ukufunda ubungqina kwiindawo zokuthandana kunokuba luhlobo lokuziqhelanisa elungileyo, njengoko unokufumana amanye amabali kwaye ufunde kumava omntu.
Luyintoni unxibelelwano?
Ngokwenkcazo, unxibelelwano ludlulisa imiyalezo isuka komnye umntu iye komnye. Injongo yokubonisa omnye umntu ukuba zithini na iimfuno zakho kunye nolindelo lwakho. Xa sithetha ngezakhono zonxibelelwano ezisebenzayo, gcinani engqondweni ukuba ezi zakhono zikuvumela ukuba uve kwaye umamele.
Iqabane lakho kufuneka livakalise iimvakalelo zabo njengawe. Ke, ye unxibelelwano olungcono emtshatweni, kuyimfuneko ukuvula indawo apho bobabini banokuyenza ngaphandle kokuthandabuza.
Kubalulekile ukwazi ukuba asizalwanga sinobuchule obuhle kunxibelelwano. Ewe abanye abantu bakhulisa izakhono ezingcono kunabanye ngobomi ngenxa yamava ahlukeneyo. Nokuba unesakhono esincinci sokunxibelelana okanye awunaso kwaphela, kuya kufuneka uyazi ukuba kunokwenzeka ukubakhulisa.
Siyayiqonda ukuba kuhlala kulula ukuthetha kunokwenza. Ke, silungiselele iingcebiso ezisixhenxe zokuphucula unxibelelwano emtshatweni.
1. Buza imibuzo evulelekileyo
Njengoko bekutshiwo ngaphambili, unxibelelwano lwesibini lunento yokwenza nokungaphezulu kokuthetha nje ngento oyityileyo ngesidlo sasemini okanye into enjalo. Oku ngakumbi kukufika kwinqanaba apho iqabane lakho likuxelela izinto ezibalulekileyo malunga nabo. Kodwa ayisiyonto ilula leyo kubantu abaninzi.
Nangona kunjalo, ukuba uqala ukoyikisa intombi okanye isithandwa sakho ngetoni yemibuzo abangakulungelanga ukuyixoxa, inokuba yingxaki. Ngethamsanqa, kukho enye indlela ethe ngqo onokuyenza ngayo Mazi kwaye umqonde umntu ngaphandle kokuwela imida yakhe -ngokubuza imibuzo evulekileyo.
Le yimibuzo xa endaweni yokubuza, umzekelo, Ubenosuku olumnandi? Ngaba ubuza enye into efana Ibiyintoni imini yakho ?; Wenzeni namhlanje?
Le mibuzo isebenza njengeziqhelaniso zoqhakamshelwano lwezibini kwaye yenze indawo engakumbi yokuba umntu athethe ngazo zonke izinto ezilungileyo nezimbi abadibana nazo emini.
2. Ukuphulaphula ngenyameko
Ukuba ujonga amanqaku amanqaku onxibelelwano, uya kuhlala ufunda ukuba kungcono ukukhuthaza ukumamela ngokukuko kubudlelwane. Ungacinga ukuba yinto eqhelekileyo, akunjalo?
Ewe kubonakala ngathi kunjalo, kodwa enyanisweni, izakhono zokumamela kubudlelwane kunzima kakhulu ukwenza njalo xa unengxoxo eshushu.
Ukongeza, sihlala sisoyika kakhulu ukuba ilizwi lethu alizukuviwa,ukuba asizukuba nalo ixesha lokuthetha into esifuna ukuyithetha, ukuba singxamele ukuthetha singakhange siqwalasele iimfuno zabanye abantu. Kodwa olu hlobo lokuziphatha lunokuzinzisa iingxaki endaweni yokuzisombulula.
3. Yiva
Kulungile, ke mhlawumbi ukwazile ukuyeka ukuthetha, kodwa umamele iqabane lakho?
Kwiimeko ezininzi, abantu basebenzisa eli xesha ukungamva othandekayo kodwa ukuya kwizinto abafuna ukuzithetha kumjikelo olandelayo wokuthetha. Uluvo kukuba inxenye yoNxibelelwano oluLungileyo lweZibini lwenza ukuba uve ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba omnye uthetha ngantoni.
Isibini seengcali ziphakamisa imisebenzi yezakhono zonxibelelwano ukusombulula le ngxaki. Enye yeembono kukuba xa usiva iqabane lakho lithetha, zama ukuphinda-phinda oko bakuthethileyo endaweni yokulungiselela impendulo yakho. Bayibiza le ndlela njengomboniso, kwaye yinto onokuyenza entlokweni yakho okanye ngokuvakalayo.
4. Ukunyaniseka kubalulekile
Inyani yile yokuba asifundiswanga ukuveza iimvakalelo zethu ngokucacileyo. Ngesi sizathu, uninzi lwabantu aluqhelanga ukuyenza okanye abanokuziqonda iimvakalelo zabo, ke kunzima ukuzithetha. Ayisiyiyo loo nto kuphela, ukugcina iimvakalelo zakho kusisicombululo. Ingadala ingxaki enkulu.
Ukwenza ngathi yonke into ilungile xa ingeyiyo okanye ukunika iqabane lakho unyango olungathethiyo zizinto ezimbi onokuzenza. Nokuba kubonakala ngathi kunzima kangakanani, kuya kufuneka usebenzele ekuvulekeni nasekunyanisekeni.
Enye yeendlela zonxibelelwano ezisebenzayo emtshatweni yile eyakho ukulungela ukwabelana ngezimvo ngekhe wabelana naye nabani na, bonisa ukuba sesichengeni kwakho, njalo njalo.
Kwividiyo engezantsi, uStacy Rocklein uthi kubalulekile ukuba sabelane ngeziqu zethu ukuze sibe kubudlelwane obuqhagamshelene ngokunzulu. Ukwathi kufuneka sikulungele ukumamela kuyo nayiphi na impendulo. Mamela ingcebiso yakhe apha ngezantsi:
5. Unxibelelwano olungenamlomo
Ibaluleke njengonxibelelwano lomlomo wesibini. Ukuthathela ingqalelo unxibelelwano olungathethi ngomlomo kubudlelwane kunokuba kubalulekile ukoyisa umgama weendlela zonxibelelwano.
Into kukuba xa ufunda ukuzifunda, uphuhlisa esinye sezakhono zonxibelelwano kwizibini ezikunceda ukuba ukuqonde ngcono ngakumbi oko kuthethwa liqabane lakho.
6. Indlela ezimbini-esitratweni
Kuyimfuneko ukuba uqaphele ukuba ubudlelwane budibanisa abantu bobabini, kwaye babaluleke ngokulinganayo kwaye banoxanduva lwendlela yobudlelwane. Bobabini abantu kufuneka babenakho ukuveza izimvo kunye neemvakalelo kwaye iviwe.
Ukuba uphantsi kwengcinga yokuba iqabane lakho liphethe ingxoxo nganye, kuya kufuneka utsalele ingqalelo yabo kuyo kwaye nixoxe ngendlela enokwahluka ngayo le meko.
7. Hlala ugxile
Xa uxoxa namaqabane, izinto ngamanye amaxesha zinokuphuma kulawulo kwaye zijike zibe yingxabano enzima ngayo yonke into. Yenza yonke into uyiphephe le ngenxa yolwalamano lwakho.
Kucacile ukuba ngamanye amaxesha kulula ukutsala zonke izinto zexesha elidlulileyo, kodwa kungcono ukuhlala esihlokweni.Ukuba ubona ukuba akukho ndlela yakukufeza oku kwaye impikiswano iyanda, kungcono uyeke nokuba kuyafuneka ukuba uhambe kude nayo.
Isiphelo
Nokuba ungathandana kangakanani kwaye neqabane lakho kwaye nonwabile kangakanani kubudlelwane, ngamanye amaxesha akukho lula. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba nobabini nifunda indlela yokusebenza kuNxibelelwano lwaBabini kwaye nikulungele ukukhula kunye, izinto zinokuba ngokuthe ngqo ngakumbi. Uziphatha njani iingxoxo okanye iimpikiswano kubudlelwane?