Umxholo
- 1. Ixhala, uxinzelelo kunye nosizi
- 2. Imo iyatshintsha
- 3. Iingxaki zempilo
- 4. Ukuziva unetyala
- 5. Uphuhliso lwentlalo
- Uqhawulo mtshato ayisiyiyo yonke into malunga nokusasaza ukungakhathali
Esinye sezigqibo ezinzima esinokuzenza kobu bomi kukukhetha ukuqhawula umtshato xa abantwana bebandakanyeka kwinkqubo ebuhlungu. Uqhawulo-mtshato ayisosigaba esimnandi ukudlula kuso, kwaye zonke iingcali ziya kuvuma ukuba ziya kuhlala zinomlinganiselo othile wempembelelo ebantwaneni, kuxhomekeke ekubeni ubudlelwane nabazali babo bunjani.
Uqhawulo mtshato luza kongeza kwangoko uxinzelelo kungekuphela kobomi bakho bobabini kodwa nakwabanye obathandayo kunye nabahlobo.
Kuya kufuneka ulumke kwaye ulumke xa usenza isigqibo sokuwushiya umtshato.
Ngalo lonke ixesha khumbula ukuba iimvakalelo ezimbi zokukhathazeka kunye nokudana okwenziwe liqabane lakho ngamanye amaxesha zinokulinganisa ngokungekho mthethweni ngaphezulu kweemfuno zabantwana bakho. Kuya kufuneka ukhumbule ukuba ukuze abantwana bakhule ngendlela efanelekileyo kwaye esempilweni, kuya kufuneka abekho emacaleni abo bobabini abazali.
Phambi kokuba singene kwezinye zeziphumo ezibi ezibangelwa kukungaboni ngasonye emtshatweni ekukhuleni komntwana, kufuneka sichaze ukuba awukho kubudlelwane obuxhaphazayo kwaye unemicimbi enokuthi isingathwe ngoncedo oluncinci lwangaphandle lokucebisa, sicebisa ukuba lungisa umtshato wakho.
Sizakubeka ezinye zeempembelelo zoqhawulo mtshato kubantwana ababanjwe embindini wawo. Qaphela ukuba uqhawulo-mtshato ngokwalo aluchaphazeli abantwana ngendlela engeyiyo, kodwa iziphumo zalo kunye nenqanaba lempixano ekhoyo phakathi kwabazali bobabini.
Kwanangaphambi kokuthatha isigqibo, "kufuneka ndihlale emtshatweni wam ngenxa yabantwana okanye hayi?", Kungcono ukuba udlule kwiziphumo ezibi ezibangelwa kukwahlukana komtshato ebantwaneni.
1. Ixhala, uxinzelelo kunye nosizi
Xa abazali behamba ngamanqanaba oqhawulo-mtshato okanye okwahlukana, abantwana ngokuzenzekelayo baya kuba kwimeko yoxinzelelo kunye nokunye ukuphazamiseka kwemood okubangelwa luxinzelelo oluhlala lubekwa kubo.
Oku kuyakuchaphazela ukubanakho kwabo ukugxila esikolweni kwaye kubonise nakwimeko yabo yokuphuhlisa ubudlelwane obutsha nabanye abantwana.
2. Imo iyatshintsha
Abantwana abancinci bathambekele ekuhluphekeni kukuphazamiseka kwemood kwaye banokukhawuleza ukuba nomsindo xa benxibelelana nabanye abakungqongileyo. Isenokuba ngokuchaseneyo. Abantwana banokuba zizethulo ezingakumbi kwaye bavalwe kude nehlabathi langaphandle.
Ngokwendalo abantwana bayaqonda xa kukho into ebangqongileyo engalunganga, kwaye ekugqibeleni, iziphumo ezibi zoqhawulo mtshato ziya kumoyisa.
3. Iingxaki zempilo
Ubungakanani boxinzelelo abantwana ababeka kulo xa abazali bejamelene noqhawulo mtshato lubonakalisa ukuba lunempembelelo enkulu kwimpilo yabo.
Amajoni abo omzimba aya kuchaphazeleka ngenxa yokungabikho kophumla kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo baya kuthanda ukugula.
Ngaphambi kokuba uqwalasele, 'Ngaba kufanelekile ukuba ndihlale emtshatweni wam ndenzela abantwana?', Kubalulekile ukuba uqwalasele intlalontle yabantwana bakho kunye nokuphazamiseka kwempilo abanokuthi babenayo ngenxa yokuqina kwempixano ekhaya.
4. Ukuziva unetyala
Abantwana abangena kuqhawulo-mtshato bazibuza ukuba kutheni abazali babo behlukana. Baza kuzibuza ukuba ngaba ngandlela thile benze into engalunganga, okanye ukuba umama notata wabo abasathandani kwakhona.
Imvakalelo yokuziva unetyala, ukuba ishiywe ikhula emntwaneni, inokukhokelela kwezinye iingxaki ezinengxaki. Oku kunegalelo kuxinzelelo nakwezinye iingxaki ezinxulumene nezempilo eziza ecaleni kwazo.
Kodwa lo mbandela unokusonjululwa ngokunxibelelana nabo nangokuzama ukubacacisela ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni.
5. Uphuhliso lwentlalo
Ukukhula kwentlalo yabantwana kuxhomekeke kunxibelelwano abanalo nabazali babo.
Abantwana ngokuzenzekelayo bafunda ukuziqhelanisa nolwalamano lwabo lwexesha elizayo nabazali babo.
Oku kubalulekile kuphuhliso lwabo lokuba ngabantu abadala kunye nokunxibelelana kwabo kwikamva lentlalontle kwilizwe langaphandle.
Uqhawulo mtshato ayisiyiyo yonke into malunga nokusasaza ukungakhathali
Uqhawulo mtshato ngamanye amaxesha luneziphumo ezihle ebantwaneni, asinakuyikhanyela loo nto. Umzali ongenaqabane ngokucacileyo uya kuzinikela ngakumbi ekukhuleni komntwana wakhe. Abanye abantwana baya kufumana izibonelelo zokuba neeKrisimesi ezimbini okanye amatheko amabini okuzalwa.
Ukuba abazali bahlala 'bengabahlobo' emva koqhawulo-mtshato, ukukhula okupheleleyo kwabantwana ngekhe kuthintelwe nangayiphi na indlela ukuba bobabini abazali bajolise ingqalelo yabo ekukhuliseni abantwana babo endaweni yemicimbi ababenayo kwixa elidlulileyo.
Umba woqhawulo-mtshato kufuneka uthathelwe ingqalelo ngobulumko kwaye ungangxameli kwisigqibo. Ngaphambi kokuba uthathe isigqibo, 'kufuneka ndihlale emtshatweni wam ngenxa yabantwana okanye hayi?', Kuyacetyiswa ukuba uqiniseke ukuba umntwana wakho unabo ebomini bakhe bobabini abazali ecaleni kwakhe kokona kuphuhla kubomi babo bobuntu obudala.