Umxholo
- Yintoni ukuthandana?
- Buyintoni ukusondelelana?
- Chitha ixesha lomgangatho kunye
- 2.Zikhethele ukusondelelana ngokomzimba
- 3.Yakha unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo
Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ungaba njani olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo, usenokuba ukhe wazibuza ngomahluko phakathi kothando nokusondelelana. Yeyiphi eyona ibaluleke ngakumbi ekugcineni ubudlelwane obonwabisayo?
Bobabini abatshatileyo kusenokwenzeka ukuba baneengcinga ezahlukeneyo malunga nokwenza uthando lwenene. Kwabanye, ukuthandana kuthetha ukubukela ukutshona kwelanga ngebhotile yewayini, kwabanye uthando lunokucofa esofeni kunye nebhakethi lenkukhu.
Kwelinye icala, ukusondelelana ayikokufumana izipho okanye ukumangaliswa liqabane lakho, kumalunga nokwakha unxibelelwano olunzulu lothando, ukuthembana kunye nokuba sesichengeni.
Kwilizwe elibanzi lothando, kunokuba nzima ukugcina izinto zilungile. Kungenxa yoko le nto sidale esi sikhokelo silula ukukufundisa umahluko omkhulu phakathi kothando nokusondelelana, kunye nokukubonisa indlela yokuzibandakanya zombini kulwalamano lwakho.
Yintoni ukuthandana?
Umahluko phakathi kothando kubudlelwane obusondeleyo kukuba uthando luhlala lubonwa njengentsingiselo edlulayo okanye engekho nzulu.
Ukuthandana ukubonisa uthando olungakabi nzulu, kuhlala kunento yokwenza nokunikela izipho okanye ukuncoma.
Oko akutsho ukuba ukuthandana akubalulekanga kubudlelwane bexesha elide. Ngokuchasene noko!
Uphando ngobusuku obuqhelekileyo bomhla lubonisa ukuba ukuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye kwidolophu kukhulisa uthando olunxibelelene kakhulu nolonwabo kunye nothando. Olu luthando kunye nothando olunceda ekuthinteleni ukukruquka kobudlelwane ekungenzeki.
Nazi iindlela ezili-10 onokongeza ngazo ezothando emtshatweni wakho.
- Musa ukoyika i-PDA. Ukunika ukwanga okuncinci esidlangalaleni, ukudlala ngothando, kunye nokubamba izandla kunako konke ukukhulisa i-cuddle hormone oxytocin kwaye kukwenze uzive uthandana ngakumbi kunangaphambili.
- Khangela iindlela onokuba luncedo ngazo. Khuphela isitya sokuhlambela isitya, zobe iqabane lakho ibhafu yokuhlambela,
- Nika izipho. Nokuba yinto exabisekileyo enje ngedayimani, iswiti njengeentyatyambo, okanye ubuqili njengokuchola isoda oyithandayo yeqabane lakho, ukupha izipho yeyona nto iphambili kwezothando.
- Khumbuza iqabane lakho. Balisa indlela owaqala ngayo ukudibana okanye ukuthetha ngamaxesha akho okuthandana kunye.
- Phuma kwimihla yothando. Akukho bantwana okanye uthetha ngomsebenzi ngalo mhla wothando. Oku konke kukusa iqabane lakho kwakhona-ngokungathi niqala ukuthandana!
- Qhayisa ngeqabane lakho. Ungakhathali, ewe, kodwa iqabane lakho liya kuthanda ukukuva ushukuma malunga nokuba zikhulu kangakanani.
- Ncoma omnye nomnye. Ngubani ongakuthandiyo ukuxelelwa ukuba bayathandana okanye bajonge ngokukodwa ngabantu abathandana nabo kwihlabathi liphela?
- Zama into entsha kunye. Thatha iklasi yokudanisa, uye esibhakabhakeni okanye ufunde ulwimi olutsha. Oku kuya kukhulisa uthando kunye nobuhlobo.
- Yenza ngokukhawuleza. Bhukisha igumbi lasehotele elinomtsalane, elithandanayo, kunye nenkonzo yegumbi kunye nejacuzzi egumbini.
- Yiba mnandi yonke imihla. Bhala "Ndiyakuthanda" kwisipili senkungu okanye uphekele iqabane lakho esona sidlo basithandayo.
Buyintoni ukusondelelana?
Kukho umahluko omkhulu phakathi kwezothando kunye nokusondelelana. Ukuthandana kunokuba yintwasahlobo, kodwa ayenzi unxibelelwano olusenyongweni nomntu.
Ezothando zimalunga nezimbo zomzimba, ukuncoma, izipho, kunye nokunika amabhabhathane amaqabane akho. Ubusondeleyo malunga nolwalamano lokwenyani, olunzulu olwenzileyo kunye neqabane lakho.
Nazi izinto ezintathu ezibalulekileyo zokusondelana neqabane.
Chitha ixesha lomgangatho kunye
Eyona ndlela inkulu yokwakha ulwalamano kubudlelwane bakho kukuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye.
Izibini ezininzi zenza umkhwa wokwenza ubusuku obuqhelekileyo bomhla omnye okanye ngaphezulu ngenyanga. Oku kubanika ithuba lokuphumla, uxinzelelo, balibale ngomsebenzi, kwaye babe nexesha elisemgangathweni kude nabantwana.
Ukudityaniswa kophando malunga nokuba nobusuku obuqhelekileyo bomhla kubonisa ukuba izibini ezichitha ixesha elifanelekileyo kunye zikhulisa unxibelelwano emtshatweni. Ikwenza ukuba abantu abatshatileyo bazive ngathi amaqabane abo athabatha ubudlelwane babo ngokungathandekiyo. Ukuba nexesha 'eliqhelekileyo' kukwabonakalisiwe ukunciphisa amathuba okuqhawula umtshato kunye nokukhuthaza umtshato ozinzileyo, owonwabileyo.
Akufanele uyeke ukuthetha kunye nokwazi iqabane lakho, nokuba nithe nahlala ixesha elide kangakanani. Izifundo zibonisa ukuba ukuhlala unomdla malunga neqabane lakho ngumkhwa osempilweni oya kugcina ubudlelwane bakho bomelele.
Ke, kwixa elizayo xa uphumile ngobusuku bomhla, buza iqabane lakho imibuzo malunga neziqu zabo. Bayayithanda ingqalelo kwaye unxibelelwano lwakho olusenyongweni luya kuzuza.
2.Zikhethele ukusondelelana ngokomzimba
I-chemistry yezesondo ibalulekile ekwakheni ukusondelelana kubudlelwane. Oku ikakhulu kungenxa yehomoni ye-oxytocin ekhutshwe ngexesha lokwabelana ngokwasemzimbeni (njengokulala ngesondo, ukubambana ngezandla, okanye ukwanga) enoxanduva lokunyusa iimvakalelo zokuthembana kunye nokukhuthaza ukubopha.
3.Yakha unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo
Ukunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo neqabane lakho akunakubethwa. Yile nto ikugcina unxibelelana ngaphaya kobudlelwane obusenyameni obabayo. Ngapha koko, uphononongo lubonisa ukuba kamva abantu abatshatileyo babenakho ukugxininisa ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo njengokubaluleke ngakumbi kunokwabelana ngesondo.
Ukwabelana ngesondo nako kungadlala indima ebalulekileyo kubudlelwane obusenyongweni neqabane lakho. Izifundo zibonakalisa ukuba ukoneliseka ngokwesondo kuqikelela ukonyusa ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo kwizibini ezitshatileyo ngenxa ye-oxytocin esele ikhankanyiwe.
Ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo ayisiyonto onokuyinyanzela, kodwa kunoko, yinto eyenzeka ngokwendalo ngaphezulu kwexesha olichitha kunye. Iyomeleza ngokuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye kunye nokukhetha ukuba sesichengeni neqabane lakho.
Umahluko phakathi kwezothando kunye nokusondelelana kulula. Enye into oyenzayo, enye yinto oziva ngayo. Ukuthandana kuya kwenza iqabane lakho lizive likhethekileyo, kodwa ulwalamano lokwenyani luya kubashiya beziva bekhuselekile kwaye bethandwa. Ukuze wakhe ubudlelwane obunempilo, obuhlala ixesha elide, kufuneka ubandakanye zombini kubomi bakho bothando.