Umxholo
- Ngaba umtshato wakho uhamba "ngababini ababi?"
- Ukufezekiswa kunyaka wakho wesibini utshatile
- Ukulindela okuninzi akunakusebenza
- Awunakho ukungahoyi iingxaki
- Kuya kubakho ukungaboni ngasonye kwezemali
- Inethiwekhi yoluntu kunye nefuthe ziya kubangela imiba
- Kuya kubakho izilingo
- Ukoyisa imiceli mngeni kunye nokubambelela
Ndiyakuvuyela! Ngoku nikunyaka we-2 nitshatile, nisahleli kunye!
Asidlali apha; unyaka nonyaka womtshato yimbalasane. Kubo bonke abo batshatileyo, uyavuma ukuba oku kuyinyani kwaye ukuba ukwiminyaka yakho yesibini yokuhlala utshatile, wenza into elungileyo, kodwa kwenzeka ntoni kanye kunyaka wesibini womtshato?
Kukuthini ukuqondwa, imiceli mngeni, kunye neemfihlo zokubambelela kwizifungo zakho emtshatweni?
Ngaba umtshato wakho uhamba "ngababini ababi?"
Unantoni umntwana omncinci onamawele amabi ngokufanayo nesibini esitshatileyo kunyaka wabo wesibini betshatile? Umntwana oneminyaka emibini ubudala unamava amabini amabi, kwaye ikwayenye yemigaqo onokuyichaza ubomi emva komtshato.
Yintoni abafana ngayo? Impendulo luhlengahlengiso.
Nokuba abantu abathandanayo sele behleli kunye iminyaka ngaphambi kokuba batshate, kunokwenzeka, kusekho umzabalazo womtshato wokuba namava kwiminyaka embalwa yokuqala yomtshato.
Unokuthi ukuhlala ndawonye lixesha elaneleyo lokuziqhelanisa, kodwa umtshato ukude kakhulu nokuhlala kunye. Kutheni ucinga njalo?
Umtshato ngumanyano lwabantu ababini. Ke, xa utshatile, wonke umntu unijonga njengobabini. Oku kunxulumene nantoni neengxaki zomtshato wokuqala? Yonke into.
Cinga ngazo zonke izigqibo zakho njengo "thina" kunye "nezethu". Ayisengowenu kodwa nobabini. Ngaphandle kolu hlengahlengiso, uqala ukubona oyena mntu utshatileyo. Yikholwe okanye ungakholelwa, nokuba iminyaka yokuhlala kunye ayizukwenza ukuba uhlengahlengiso lube lula.
Ukusuka kwimisebenzi yemihla ngemihla ukuya kuhlahlo-lwabiwo mali, ukusuka kwisondo ukuya kwikhwele, umtshato uya kukubonisa ukuba kunzima kangakanani ukuba kunye njengeqabane lakho.
Ewe, akukho lula, kwaye uxinzelelo emtshatweni ngamanye amaxesha lunokuba nzima, ngakumbi xa imiba iba nkulu kwaye ingalawuleki.
Ngelixa iminyaka emi-2 yobudlelwane emtshatweni kuyinto eqhelekileyo, kukho iimeko ezithile apho ukuqonda kwenzeka khona, kwaye uzibone utshata nomntu ongalunganga.
Kulapho kungena khona uqhawulo-mtshato emtshatweni wokuqala. Ukuphoxeka emtshatweni kuxhaphake kakhulu kunokuba ucinga, kwaye ngethemba, akufiki kule minyaka yakho yesi-2 yomtshato.
Ukufezekiswa kunyaka wakho wesibini utshatile
Ukuziqhelanisa nobomi bomtshato asikokuhamba epakini, kwaye nawaphi na amalungu osapho okanye abahlobo obaziyo banokukuxelela into efanayo.
Kwincopho yonyaka wakho we-2 womtshato, uqala ukubona ukuqonda malunga nomanyano lwakho, olunokuthi emva koko lwenze okanye lwaphule ubudlelwane bakho.
Yindlela ophatha ngayo unyaka wakho wokuqala weengxaki zomtshato eziya kuthi zichonge ukuba womelele kangakanani kunyaka wesibini, wesithathu, nowesine womtshato wakho.
Ukulindela okuninzi akunakusebenza
Uxinzelelo kunye nokuqhekeka komtshato kwenzeka xa ungasakwazi ukuthatha ukuphoxeka kunye nokuphazamiseka emtshatweni kuba ulindelo lwakho aluhambelani nomntu owatshatileyo.
Ukulindela kuyafuneka ukuze sikwazi ukufikelela kwiinjongo zethu, kodwa okuninzi kuya kuhlala kukhokelela ekuphoxekeni kwaye oku kungakhokelela ekuthandaneni nasekuhloniphaneni.
Awunakho ukungahoyi iingxaki
Njengomntu otshatileyo, kufuneka uqonde ukuba awunakho ukungahoyi iingxaki.
Ukuba udinwe kakhulu ukuba ungathetha, fumana ixesha lokuyenza kamva, kodwa ungayikhathaleli. Ixesha elingaphezulu, oku kunokubangela inzondo kunye nemicimbi emikhulu. Kuya kufuneka ukhumbule ukuba ubudlelwane beminyaka emi-2 obudityaniswe ngumtshato kukwathetha ukuba kuya kufuneka uqonde ukuba kuya kubakho ukungavisisani, kodwa ungakuvumeli ukuba konakalise umtshato wakho.
Kuya kubakho ukungaboni ngasonye kwezemali
Ukuba uvile ukuba imali ayingomthombo wolonwabo, uchanekile, kodwa ukuba uthi imali ayinakuze ikukhathalele, ayiyonyani kwaphela leyo.
Imali ibalulekile, kwaye kuyakubakho amaxesha apho uya kuba nokungaboni ngasonye ngayo. Umtshato unzima kwaye ukwakha usapho kunzima, ngamanye amaxesha, kungathatha umthwalo kuwe nakwimitshato yakho. Ukuba uneqabane elingaziyo ukwenza uhlahlo-lwabiwo mali, oku kunokubangela imicimbi ethile ngokwezezimali.
Inethiwekhi yoluntu kunye nefuthe ziya kubangela imiba
Imithombo yeendaba, njengoko iluncedo kuthi, iya kuthi ibangele imicimbi emikhulu emtshatweni.
Inye into ekufuneka uyiqaphele kwisibini sakho sokuqala seminyaka sitshatile kukuba ngamanye amaxesha, iinethiwekhi zonxibelelwano kunye nefuthe labahlobo kunye nabantu osebenza nabo kunokubangela imicimbi phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho.
Ayinabungozi, abanye bathi njengoko bekhusela isenzo sabo sokudlala ngothando kwimidiya yoluntu okanye nabanye abantu kodwa ukutshata kunemiqobo, kwaye esi sesinye sezizathu eziqhelekileyo zokuba abantu abatshatileyo bahlukane.
Kuya kubakho izilingo
Asizimisele kuqhekeza iqabunga lomntu apha, kodwa zizakuhlala zikhona izilingo.
Ubomi buza kukuvavanya nawe!
Ukuba unonyaka wesibini utshatile, ngumqondiso olungileyo lowo. Ukulingwa kuyinto eqhelekileyo, sonke singabantu, kodwa into engalunganga kukuzinikezela nokuba uyazi ukuba ayilunganga. Esinye sezizathu eziqhelekileyo zokungaphumeleli emtshatweni kukungathembeki kwaye le yinto ekufuneka siyazi sonke.
Ukoyisa imiceli mngeni kunye nokubambelela
Ukuhlala othandweni emva komtshato yinjongo yomntu wonke.
Ukuhlala kunye de iinwele zakho zibe mpunga liphupha lomntu wonke kodwa njengoko ubomi busenzeka, imiceli mngeni nayo iqala ukuvavanya izifungo zethu omnye komnye.
Ewe kunjalo, iminyaka elishumi yokuqala yomanyano lwethu iya kuba yeyona minyaka inzima emtshatweni, kwaye ayisiyibaxi loo nto. Ukwazi umntu, ukuhlala naye, ukuziqhelanisa neenkolelo zakhe kunye nokusebenza kunye ekukhuliseni abantwana kunye kuya kuvavanya ngandlela zonke kodwa uyazi ntoni? Yiyo loo nto beyibiza ngokuguga kunye, nobabini niya kukhula kungekuphela nje ngeminyaka kodwa nobulumko nolwazi.
Uyoyisa imiceli mngeni kwaye ubambelela kwizifungo zakho kuba anithandani, niyahlonipha kwaye nixabise iqabane lakho njengomntu. Ke, ukuba ungumntu okwiminyaka ye-2 yomtshato-siyakuvuyela! Unendlela ende ekusafuneka uhambe, kodwa uqala ukomelela.