Umxholo
- Ngaba ukwahlukana kunokusindisa umtshato?
- 1. Ubude bexesha
- 2. Iinjongo
- 3. Unxibelelwano
- 4. Imihla
- 5. Abantwana
- 6. Inkxaso yomntu wesithathu
Nantsi imeko yobomi bokwenyani.
"UJohn noKatie bebengonwabanga emtshatweni iminyaka elishumi behlala noxinzelelo olungapheliyo kunye noxinzelelo".
Emva kweminyaka emininzi yomtshato nokukhulisa abantwana, uJohn wazifumana ecinga ukuba akonwabanga ngomtshato wakhe. Wayesindwa yimicimbi yokuthembana,ukunqongophala konxibelelwano, kunye ulwalamano iingxaki ezitshutshisa umtshato wabo.
UJohn uxelele umfazi wakhe ukuba ufuna ukwahlukana. Umfazi wakhe wavuma kwaye bobabini bagqiba kwelokuba bathathe ikhefu leenyanga ezintandathu emtshatweni wabo. ”
Zininzi izinto ezinokubangela uqhekeko emtshatweni wakho. Kodwa, ungawusindisa umtshato wakho phambi kokuba uphele enkundleni uqhawulo-mtshato.
Kodwa, 'kufuneka sohlukane okanye cha?'
Ewe, ukwahlukana kubonakala kuyinto efanelekileyo kwabaninzi. Oku kunika ithuba lokucinga ngemicimbi ebalulekileyo ebangela isiphithiphithi emtshatweni wakho.
Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba yonke into ilahleke, kuya kufuneka uzame ukugcina umtshato wakho, okokugqibela. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, uqhawulo-mtshato alunakuze lube lolona khetho lodwa kwaye ubaleke kwimicimbi yomtshato.
Ngaba ukwahlukana kunokusindisa umtshato?
Zithathu izizathu eziphambili zokwahlukana neqabane lomtshato.
Okokuqala, linyathelo lenkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato. Uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo bayazi nje ukuba umtshato wabo awunakuhlala kwaye usebenzise ukwahlukana ukuze bazinike ixesha ngaphambi komtshato. Ngamanye amaxesha, izibini ezahlulayo ukuze zifumane umbono ngomtshato wazo, (njengoJohn noKatie). Emva kokwahlukana kwabo, uJohn noKatie bakwazi ukubamanyanisa ngempumelelo kwaye bomeleza umtshato wabo.
Ukwahlukana kunokunceda ukuphucula ubudlelwane bakho neqabane lakho kwaye ugcine umtshato wakho, ekugqibeleni.
Ukuthatha isigqibo sokuhlukana neqabane lakho akukho lula. Isibini esigqiba kwelokuba sahlukane sijongwa ikakhulu ngabantu bangaphandle njengabo bafikelele kwinqanaba lokophuka kulwalamano lwabo.
Mhlawumbi, bazamile amanye amaqhinga kunye nongenelelo ukunceda umtshato wabo, kodwa akukho nto inokuba yasebenza kubo. Ke ekugqibeleni bayahlukana kwaye ekugqibeleni bayawuqhawula umtshato.
Ke kutheni amaqabane ehlukene kodwa angaqhawuli mtshato? Kukho elinye icala kule nto, ngapha koko. Izibini azikhe ziyeke ukuvavanya ixabiso lonyango lokwahlukana. Ngapha koko, ukuba yenziwe ngendlela eyiyo (kwaye ngenxa yezizathu ezifanelekileyo) ngezivumelwano ezicacileyo kwasekuqaleni, ayinakugcina kuphela umtshato wakho kodwa iwuphucule nawo.
Ukuphumeza injongo yokuphela (Ukwahlula ukugcina okanye ukuphucula umtshato wakho), Kuya kufuneka uqiniseke ukuba izinto ezimbalwa zisendaweni efanelekileyo ngaphambi kokuba ungene.
Nazi izikhombisi ezimbalwa okanye iingcebiso ngokwahlukana komtshato ezinokukunceda-
1. Ubude bexesha
Oku kunokwahluka kwisibini ngasinye, kodwa iinyanga ezi-6 ukuya kwezi-8 zexesha lokwahlukana ikakhulu zithathwa njengefanelekileyo.
Owona mqobo uphambili wokwahlukana okwandisiweyo emtshatweni kukuba kunokuhlala kukhokelela kuwo omabini amaqabane ekukhululekeni kakhulu kubomi babo obutsha, ebakhokelela ekubeni bakholelwe ukuba ukungafani kwabo akunakulungiswa okanye bangcono kakhulu ngale ndlela.
Yiyo loo nto ukubeka ulindelo olucacileyo nolusengqiqweni kubaluleke kakhulu. Ngokumisela ixesha lokwahlukana, niyavumelana ukuba eli lixesha ekufuneka nilisombulule nobabini.
Ukuba ishiywe ingagqitywanga, imiba emitsha inokukhula enokukhokelela kungavisisani ngakumbi. Ngaba ukwahlukana kuyasebenza ukugcina umtshato? Ewe, kukho amaxesha apho ukwahlukana okwandisiweyo kususa ngokupheleleyo konke ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu abatshatileyo.
Ke, ukuba kufuneka ugcine umtshato wakho kuqhawulo-mtshato, kuya kufuneka uphinde uliqwalasele ixesha lokwahlukana komtshato ngaphambi kokuba uphume.
2. Iinjongo
Ungawusindisa njani umtshato ngexesha lokwahlukana? Ukuxoxa neqabane lakho kuhlala yeyona ndlela ilungileyo yokwenza ukwahlukana nokusombulula imicimbi kunye njengeqela.
Ungaze ucinge ukuba nobabini nikwiphepha elinye. Xoxa kwaye uvumelane ukuba nobabini niyakwenza oku ukusombulula imicimbi yenu kunye nokuphucula umtshato wenu.
Umzekelo -
Ukuba elinye lamaqabane lifuna ukuwuhlangula umtshato, kodwa elinye licinga ukuba sisiqalo nje senkqubo yoqhawulo-mtshato, oko kungakhokelela kwimicimbi ephambili yokuthembana. Kungenxa yoko le nto ukuxoxa lo mbandela kwangaphambili kubalulekile ukuze wenze oku kube yimpumelelo.
3. Unxibelelwano
Emva kokuthatha isigqibo sokuba nobabini nifuna ukusebenza kwimiba yenu ngokuqhubeka nokwahlukana ukugcina umtshato, thethani ngendlela eniza kunxibelelana ngayo ngeli xesha.
Ukungabikho konxibelelwano konke konke ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kuba nenjongo ekufikeleleni kwisiphelo. Thatha isigqibo malunga nobuninzi bokunxibelelana kwakho ngaphambili. Ukuba elinye iqabane linqwenela ukuthetha yonke imihla, kodwa elinye lifuna ukuba ibe yinto yeveki, emva koko kufuneka kwenziwe isigqibo sobabini.
Ukuba unqwenela ukuwusindisa umtshato wakho, kufuneka uze kwisivumelwano kwisigaba sokwahlukana okwethutyana.
4. Imihla
Ngaba ufanele wohlukane ngaphambi koqhawulo-mtshato? Ngaba uyeke ukubonana emva kokwahlukana?
Ewe, ukwahlukana akuthethi ukuba uyeke ukuthandana. Thatha isigqibo sokuba niya kudibana kangaphi kwaye nichithe ixesha kunye.
Yiya kwiintsuku zokutya kwaye uphinde unxibelelane ngokweemvakalelo neqabane lakho. Sebenzisa eli xesha ukuxoxa ngendlela yokusombulula imicimbi ebangela isiphithiphithi kulwalamano. Fumana izisombululo ezitsha onokuzizisa emtshatweni wakho.
Endaweni yokusondelelana ngokwasemzimbeni, jolisa ingqalelo yakho kulwalamano lwakho lweemvakalelo kwaye uzame ukukhulisa. Oku kunokukunceda ugcine umtshato wakho kuqhawulo mtshato.
5. Abantwana
Ukwahlukana kunokuba lixesha eliphazamisayo ebantwaneni bakho, ke yenza iindlela ezinokukunceda ukuba ube ngumzali osebenza kakuhle. Phendula imibuzo yabantwana bakho kunye kwaye uqiniseke ukuba ulawula iimpendulo zakho ezingalunganga (ezinjengomsindo, ukubiza igama, njl.) Phambi kwabo.
6. Inkxaso yomntu wesithathu
Ukufuna umntu wesithathu, njengomgqirha, abefundisi, okanye umlamli (ilungu losapho okanye umhlobo), unokuququzelela inkqubo yokusombulula imicimbi yakho.
Kuyacetyiswa ukuba ufune uhlobo oluthile loncedo ngexesha lokwahlukana ukugcina umtshato wakho kuqhawulo mtshato.
Isiphelo
Xa sivakalelwa kukuba iqabane lethu liyashenxa kuthi, impendulo yethu yendalo kukusondela kubo kwaye senze konke okusemandleni ukugcina umtshato. Ingcinga yokwahlukana, okanye ukudala umgama ngexesha elinje, ifaka uloyiko, uloyiko, ukuthandabuza, kunye noxinzelelo olukhulu ngokunjalo.
Ukusebenzisa olo khetho kunokuba ngumceli mngeni ngakumbi xa ibhondi ibuthathaka okanye ubudlelwane buthathaka kakhulu.
Kodwa ngokusebenzisa ukhathalelo kunye nezakhono (zihlala zixhaswa ngoncedo lweengcali), ukwahlukana KUNOKWENZEKA ngokukuko ekusondeleni abantu ababini kunye. Ngapha koko, ukugcina umtshato wakho emva kokwahlukana kuya kuba lula kakhulu.
Yigcine engqondweni into yokuba esi sixhobo asiyo eyabo bangenanjongo yokuhlala namaqabane abo. Eyona nto imbi onokuyenza kubo kukuzenza ngathi unomdla wokusebenza.