Ekuvukeni koqhawulo-mtshato, bobabini abazali abatyhubela kuyo bafumana iimvakalelo ezibuhlungu kunye neentlungu ezintle. Ezi mvakalelo ngamanye amaxesha zikhokelela umntu okanye bobabini abantu kwi-badmouth kwaye bagxeke umntu wabo wakudala. Ngelixa umsindo kunye nokukhathazeka kuyaqondakala kwaye neemvakalelo kufuneka zikhutshiwe, oku kuba yingxaki xa kukhathaza iimvakalelo zomnye umntu kwaye kudala iingxaki ezingakumbi.
Xa umzali wakho osebenza naye egxeka isenzo sakho kunye nokwenza amagqabantshintshi malunga nawe kubantwana bakho, abantwana bafumana uxinzelelo olukhulu lweemvakalelo. Nokuba bayakholelwa okanye baxelelwe into abayixelelweyo, ukuyiva nje kuphela kuyabachaphazela kwimbambano ephakathi kwabazali babo. Le yinto ekusenokwenzeka ukuba bazama nzima kakhulu ukuyiphepha okanye abalindelanga ukuba yinxalenye yokuqala. Abantwana kufuneka babenethuba lokwakha ubudlelwane obunempilo nabazali babo bobabini obakhelwe ngokuthembakeleyo, kwaye ukumamela kuko konke oku kugxekwa ngomnye okanye bobabini abazali babo kuyawenzakalisa amathuba okuba kwenzeke. Umntwana kufanele ukuba athembe njani ukuba umzali wakhe akazukuqala ukuqondisa ukugxeka kubo kamva?
Ngaphandle kwabazali kuphela, kunokwenzeka ukuba amanye amalungu osapho anokuthetha izinto ezimbi ngomnye wabazali. Nangona ayingomnye wabazali abathetha ezi zinto, ukuba zivela kwelinye ilungu losapho elithembekileyo zisenokubaphazamisa kwaye zibaphazamise. Oku kugxekwa kungabeka umqobo kubudlelwane phakathi kwabazali okanye abazali okanye amanye amalungu osapho.
Xa uhlangabezana nale nto kusapho lwakho, usenokuba uyazibuza ukuba yeyiphi indlela yokujongana nayo. Inyathelo lokuqala kukuthetha nabantwana bakho malunga noko sele kuthethiwe. Bazise into engeyonyani, kwaye ukuba iinxalenye zayo zikho, sebenzisa owona mgwebo ungcono ukucacisa ukuba kutheni kusithiwa kubantwana bakho, uhlala ugcina iimpendulo zakho zifanelekile ukuba abantwana bakho baziqonde ngokuxhomekeke kubudala babo. Sebenzisa oku ukufundisa abantwana bakho isifundo sokuba nobubi kunye nokugxeka kakhulu abanye, hayi njengethuba lokubuyela kumntu obekugxeka. Ukuba uphendula kule meko ngokugxeka okanye ngokuthetha izinto ngomnye umzali, oku kuqhubeka ngakumbi kubandakanya abantwana kumzabalazo ekufuneka begcinwe kude nawo. Njengoko uva oko abantwana bakho bathethayo, musa ukuba nomsindo kubo ngokuzisa lo mbandela. Endaweni yoko, vumela ukuba bakuxelele abakuvileyo kwaye babuze imibuzo ukuze ucacise kwaye uthomalalise inkxalabo yabo.
Emva kokuba uthethile nabantwana bakho, kuya kufuneka uqale ucinge ngeendlela zokuzikhusela kule ngxoxo okwesibini. Sukusebenzisa abantwana bakho njengomthunywa kule meko; endaweni yoko, dibana nalo mntu ngokwakho. Thetha nomntu othetha izinto ezingalunganga ngawe, kwaye umcele ukuba ayeke ngokukhawuleza. Ukuba awucingi ukuba ungahlala uzolile emntwini okanye emnxebeni nalo mntu, zama ukuthumela isicelo sakho nge-imeyile. Ukuba umntu akaphenduli kakuhle, khangela isikhokelo kwingcali efana nomcebisi okanye ingcali, kwaye uthethe nabo ngeendlela zokuqhubeka koku. Ukuba umntu owayethetha izinto ezimbi ngawe ungumzali wakho, kuya kufuneka uthethe negqwetha lakho ngayo nokuba kwenzeka ntoni. Igqwetha lakho lingakunceda ekuphenduleni imibuzo yakho kwaye likuncede uthathe inyathelo lezomthetho ukuba oko kuyenzeka.
Ukugxeka nokuthetha izinto ezingalunganga malunga nabanye abantu kunokubangela intlungu enkulu emntwini ekugqibeleni kwezo zimvo. Kwimeko yokuba ngumzali osebenzisana kunye, inxeba linokusasazeka ngokukhawuleza ebantwaneni. Unokunceda ukunciphisa umonakalo kunye nokukhawulezisa ukuphilisa ngokujongana nemeko ngokukhawuleza nangokuzola. Kwakhona, ukuba awuqinisekanga ngendlela efanelekileyo yokusingatha le meko nosapho lwakho, thetha nomthetho wosapho okanye ugqirha wezempilo yengqondo ngokukhawuleza. Banokukunceda ufumane iindlela zokujongana nale meko ngendlela efanelekileyo.