Umxholo
- Kubaluleke kangakanani ukusondelelana kubudlelwane
- 1. Uthando ngendlela iqabane lakho elifuna ukuthandwa ngayo
- 2. Thetha ngezinto ozifunayo kwiqabane lakho
- 3. Uthando ngaphandle kwemiqathango
- 4. Beka omnye komnye kuqala
- 5. Luyekele ukhuphiswano
- 6. Yiba ngumthandi opha ngaphakathi nangaphandle kwegumbi lokulala
Ngaba uthando nokusondelelana emtshatweni akunakubuyiselwa?
Ngeendlela ezininzi, umtshato ufana nesityalo. Amathuba amaninzi xa kutyalwe okokuqala. Ke, ukuba uyayondla, uyondle, kwaye uyinyamekele, iya kukhula.
Sonke isityalo sahlukile kwaye sidinga izakha mzimba ezahlukileyo emhlabeni, okanye ngaphezulu okanye ngaphantsi kwamanzi okanye ilanga. Kodwa ekufundeni malunga neemfuno zesityalo esithile, kwaye emva koko uphendule ngokunika into eyifunayo, iya kuchuma kwaye ifikelele kumandla ayo apheleleyo.
Ngokunjalo, xa usenza nje ubuncinci obungenantsingiselo-okanye okubi ngakumbi, awonelanga-ukugcina isityalo siphila, unokuwubona umahluko ngokulula.
Iba droopy. Amagqabi angoma kwaye aqhekeke. Iingcambu zisenokungabi sempilweni njengoko zinokuba njalo. Intyatyambo okanye isiqhamo asikho sikhulu okanye sihle ngendlela ebesinokuba ngayo. Ngaphezulu kokuyibona, unokukuva nje.
Umtshato unje futhi. Xa wena okanye iqabane lakho ungondli kwaye ukondla umtshato, awunakukhula. Iba buthathaka kwaye ingaphili, kwaye ke ubomi, ngokubanzi, buba ngumlingo omncinci. Akumangalisi kangako. Ngaphantsi kothando.
Kubaluleke kangakanani ukusondelelana kubudlelwane
Uthando nokusondelelana emtshatweni akunangxoxo. Ngapha koko, ukusondelelana kunye nomtshato ziyahambelana.
Zininzi izinto ekufuneka uzenzile ukondla umtshato, kodwa inye kuphela into yokuba umtshato wakho awunakuphila ngaphandle kwakho. Kufana neoksijini kwisityalo.
Oko sithetha ngako kukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo. Ngoku, abanye abantu bacinga ngokusondelelana njengesenzo sesondo, kodwa emtshatweni, kuninzi kakhulu kunoko. Luthando lwayo olupheleleyo nolunyulu.
Ke, ungawavuselela njani amanqanaba omtshato kumanqanaba okusondelelana kubudlelwane? Nazi ezinye zeendlela zokunceda ukuphucula ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo emtshatweni wakho.
1. Uthando ngendlela iqabane lakho elifuna ukuthandwa ngayo
Akukho mfihlo yokuba amadoda nabafazi bahlukile. Ngaphezulu, umntu ngamnye uneemfuno ezahlukeneyo.
Ayingawo onke amabhinqa aya kuthi aziva ithandwa xa umyeni wawo esenza i-XYZ; ke ukuze ube nomtshato ophilileyo ngokweemvakalelo, kuya kufuneka ujonge kwaye ubuze ukuba iqabane lakho lifuna ntoni kuwe.
Mhlawumbi ngexesha elinye kuthetha okungaphezulu kokuwola, okanye mhlawumbi ubenzela into entle kuthetha okungaphezulu kokuthenga izipho.
2. Thetha ngezinto ozifunayo kwiqabane lakho
Emtshatweni, ngamanye amaxesha silindela ukuba omnye abe ngumfundi weengqondo. Oko kukuseta izinto zokuphoxeka. Ukuba ufuna ukusondelelana ngokwasemzimbeni rhoqo, yitsho njalo (khetha umzuzu wakho kwaye ukhethe amagama akho ngobulumko).
Ngalo lonke ixesha ulumke ungonzakalisi iimvakalelo njengoko ucebisa izinto; mhlawumbi nibe nexesha elikhethekileyo xa nobabini ninokwabelana ngokukhululekileyo ezi ntlobo zeembono ukuze nobabini nizive nikhululekile ngayo.
Ukunxibelelana ngokukhululekileyo nangokunyaniseka malunga neemfuno zomnye nomnye xa kufikwa kumba wolwalamano kubalulekile emtshatweni.
3. Uthando ngaphandle kwemiqathango
Abantu zizidalwa ezingafezekanga.
Nditsho nomntu onothando neneenjongo ezintle wenza iimpazamo. Sinosuku olubi kwaye sithetha izinto esingazichazanga. Mhlawumbi siyabona iqabane lethu linikezela kancinci emtshatweni ukuze sive isidingo sokuthanda kancinci, nathi.
Ungakuvumeli oku kwenzeke. Musa ukubeka iimeko kuthando lwakho. Nokuba iqabane lakho alithandanga ngendlela ofuna ngayo, sukuluyeka uthando lwakho.
Ungaze ubeke ubudlelwane obusondeleyo emtshatweni njengoko isidingo sokwabelana kunye nokunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo emtshatweni kungenakubuyiselwa.
4. Beka omnye komnye kuqala
Ukuba nobabini ninyanisekile omnye komnye, ungatsho kwangoko ukuba yeyiphi eyona nto iphambili ebomini bakho.
Ngaba kuyasebenza? Abantwana? Ukwenza imali? Ishishini lakho elisecaleni? Ukomelela? Iincwadi?
Zininzi izinto ezintle ezinokususa kude nokugcina umtshato ubekwa kwindawo yokuqala. Ukuba umtshato wakho awuyona nto ephambili kuwe, sebenzela ukwenza njalo.
Misela imihla yeveki.Yenza izinto ezincinci kunye, njengokupheka okanye ukuhamba. Bambani izandla. Cinga ngeqabane lakho phambi kwakho kwaye uya kuba usendleleni eya ekwakheni ukusondelelana emtshatweni.
5. Luyekele ukhuphiswano
Rhoqo abantu kubudlelwane bahlambalaza uncedo ngendlela yokunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo nendoda okanye umfazi. Iqhekeza leengcebiso eziphambili kubo -ukukhuseleka kubudlelwane, kwaye uhlakulele ubudlelwane obomeleleyo beemvakalelo, kukuyeka ukugcina amanqaku kwaye endaweni yoko ujonge kwiziphumo zeqabane lakho.
Akusekho kugcina amanqaku. Andiphindi “ndihlambe izitya phezolo!” Endaweni yoko, nikela ngoncedo lwakho, okanye nisebenze kunye. Ukugcina amanqaku akukhange kuncede nawuphi na umtshato ekwakheni ubudlelwane obusondeleyo kwaye endaweni yoko kukhokelele kwiingxaki ezininzi zomtshato kwizibini ezitshatileyo.
Endaweni yokucinga ukuba ngamnye kufuneka anike iipesenti ezingama-50 ukwenza enye iphelele, elowo kuni kufuneka anike i-100% ukwenza umtshato wakho umangalisa ngokwenene. Ukhuphiswano lungena endleleni yoku. Makhe siye kwaye ekusebenzeni kunye kwaye nibe yinto enye.
Jonga kwakhona:
6. Yiba ngumthandi opha ngaphakathi nangaphandle kwegumbi lokulala
Ukusondelelana yinto enzima.
Unecala lomzimba kunye necala leemvakalelo. Ngamanye amaxesha siba nayo yonke imizimba ngaphandle kokuzibophelela ngokweemvakalelo, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha sinokuzinikela ngokweemvakalelo ngaphandle kokusondelelana ngokomzimba.
Nika iqabane lakho ukwanga akuthanda kakhulu, okanye isini asinqwenelayo. Ngawo loo mzuzu ukuba iqabane lakho lizalisekiswe, uya kuba njalo.
Xa unokulungelelanisa bobabini emtshatweni, unento evisisanayo ngokwenene.
Unabantu ababini abaziva bethandana, kwaye nabo bayabonisana oku. Yenza oku ngokuba nothando ngokwasemzimbeni nangokomzwelo ngaphakathi nangaphandle kwegumbi lokulala.
Akukho kunqongophala kwezimvo okanye iindlela zokuba sisondelelene ngaphandle kokuba ngumzimba kwaye xa isondo singekho phezulu kwengqondo yakho, jonga ezinye iindlela zokonwabela uthando nokusondelelana emtshatweni.
Zininzi iindlela zokuzisondeza emtshatweni eziya kukunceda ukhuthaze unxibelelwano olomeleleyo neqabane lakho.
Kuya kuba luncedo ukujonga izimvo malunga nokuba ungasondelelana njani ngeendlela ezingezizo ezesondo kunye neqabane lakho.
Ukungabikho kolwalamano olusondeleyo emtshatweni kuthintela impilo-ntle yomntu kunye nokonwaba emtshatweni. Sukuvumela uxinzelelo lwemihla ngemihla kunye nokungaqiniseki kuchaphazele impilo yolwalamano lwakho. Hlukana neendlela zokunxibelelana ezingalunganga kwaye unike iqabane lakho imbeko ebafaneleyo.
Khumbula, esona sixhobo sibalulekileyo ekubuyiseleni uthando kunye nokusondelelana emtshatweni kukulungela kwakho ukwakha ubuhlobo emtshatweni, ngaphandle kwawo ungenakho ukwakha kunye nokugcina ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo njengesibini.