Umxholo
- Ukuzoba umgca phakathi kothando losapho kunye nolwalamano oluqinisiweyo
- Ukususa iivili zoqeqesho
- Ukunyathela kumgxobhozo womhlaba
Uninzi lwezinto ezintle alulunganga. Sisaci esidala esisebenza kwizinto ezininzi, kubandakanya nothando. Ubudlelwane obomeleleyo kuxa umntu omnye ethanda umntu kakhulu kangangokuba ubuthabathela kuye ubomi.
Ekuboneni kokuqala, abagqwesileyo kunye nothando bangathi kuphela kwendlela yokwenene yokuthandana.Ngandlela-thile, banyanisile, kodwa kwimeko ebonakalayo yophuhliso lomntu kunye nentsingiselo yegolide, ihlala kwisiphelo esigqithisileyo sokugqitha.
Ukusilela kwemida yobuqu ecacileyo kuchaza ubudlelwane obomeleleyo.
Amalungu osapho afanele ukuba athandane kwaye avelane. Nangona kunjalo, xa imida yobuqu ingasekho phakathi kwabo, iba bubudlelwane obungenampilo.
Luyintoni ubudlelwane obomeleleyo kwaye kutheni kukho ukungakholelwa gwenxa ngalo?
Ukuzoba umgca phakathi kothando losapho kunye nolwalamano oluqinisiweyo
Nalu uluhlu lweempawu ezibonisa ukuba ukwimeko yobudlelwane obuvakalayo ngokukaRoss Rosenberg, ugqirha wezengqondo nojolise kwezobudlelwane.
- Ilizwe lakho lijikeleza umntu omnye. Uyabutyeshela obunye ubudlelwane ngaphandle kwalowo.
- Ukonwaba kwakho kunye nokuzithemba kwakho kuxhomekeke kulonwabo lomntu omnye. Uziva nantoni na abavakalelwa ngayo.
- Awuphelelanga xa kukho ukungqubana naloo mntu. Uya kuncama nantoni na ukuze nje wenze izinto.
- Uziva unamandla okwahlulahlula uxinzelelo xa ukude naloo mntu ixesha elifutshane.
Omnye weyona miqobo mikhulu kulwalamano olomeleleyo kukuba abantu abanengxaki yokuphazamiseka bangabokugqibela ukukuqonda, kwaye xa besenza, abayi kufumana nto iphosakeleyo ngayo.
Kunzima kakhulu ukuchaza ukuba kutheni kuphosakele ukuba nabani na athande usapho lwakhe kakhulu. Kodwa ngokukaRosenberg, imida engenayo yabantu kubudlelwane obuzinzileyo ibenza balahlekelwe bubuntu babo kwaye babe ngamakhoboka obudlelwane.
Kukho namaxesha apho ukungasebenzi kakuhle kuchaphazela ngaphandle kobudlelwane kunye nokonakalisa ezinye iinxalenye zobomi babo. Ekugqibeleni, elinye okanye omabini amaqela kubudlelwane obomeleleyo bagqibela ngokuphulukana nayo yonke into ngenxa yabo.
Ukuqinisekisa abantu ngaphakathi kobu budlelwane ukuba bajonge kwikamva lokuzahlula kunye nokungasebenzi, uninzi lwabo alunakukhathalela. Abantu kubudlelwane obunjalo babeka phambili intlalontle yobudlelwane babo obomeleleyo kwihlabathi liphela. Kuba bayintsapho, ngandlela thile, iyavakala.
Iintsapho aziboni mida yodwa. Ngapha koko, usapho olunothando alunakufumana nto ingako. Eso sisicwangciso sohlaselo, sebenzisa uthando olufanayo olubagungqisayo kwaye uluguqule lube lolwalamano olusempilweni.
Ukususa iivili zoqeqesho
Bonke abantwana bafunde ukuhamba ngokushiya isandla somzali wabo. Ukonwaba kwabo bobabini abazali kunye nomntwana xa umntwana ethatha amanyathelo abo yenye yezona zinto zinomvuzo emhlabeni.
Iingcali zengqondo ezinje ngeRosenberg, zikholelwa ekubeni ukuxhomekeka kwikhowudi kunye nokuqiniswa kukungasebenzi kakuhle kuba kuthintela ukukhula komntu ngamnye. Ikwenza oko ngokungaze ishiye isandla somntwana, kwaye abafundi ukuzihambela. Umntwana uya kuhamba ngebhayisekile ebomini kumavili oqeqesho. Kubonakala ngathi bayayazi into abayenzayo, kodwa kukude nenyaniso.
Umzekelo, kubudlelwane botata obufihliweyo, umzali wokutsala uya kuyigcina intombi yakhe kude kwinto ayibona isisisongelo. Ekukhuleni kwayo intombi ikhuselwe kwaye ikhuselwe. Uyehluleka ukuphuhlisa izakhono ezifanelekileyo zokunxibelelana nabantu nokuzikhusela "kwizisongelo". kuba uyenzelwa ngutata wakhe.
Ngokuhamba kwexesha, ukuzikhusela ngokugqithiseleyo kwaba buthathaka. Uyasilela nje ukuqaphela kunye nokuthintela "izoyikiso" kuba khange afunde ukuba kanjani, okanye okubi kakhulu ucinga ukuba uyindoda egqibeleleyo elandelwa ukulandela utata kwaye angene kubudlelwane obunothando.
Uninzi lwabantu abadala namhlanje luyakhalaza ukuba izikolo azifundisi ukuba ngabantu abadala. Ukuba mdala ligama langoku elithetha intsingiselo esebenzayo kunye nolwazi oluqhelekileyo ukuze uphile kwihlabathi lokwenyani. Sisiphumo esithe ngqo sokubamba ngesandla kakhulu. Aba bantu bayalibala ukuba, ukuba uyakwazi ukufunda, uchwetheze, kunye noGoogle, ungafunda nantoni na. Isikolo okanye akukho sikolo.
Ukunyathela kumgxobhozo womhlaba
Ubudlelwane obomeleleyo bukho kuyo yonke indawo. Ke kuyenzeka ukuba udibane kwaye ukhathalele umntu okuye. Umzekelo, ukutshata kwintsapho ebusisiwe. Ekuqaleni, kwanaxa usathandana, unokufumanisa kuyinto entle ukuba isithandwa sakho sisondele kusapho lwaso.
Ekugqibeleni, iqala ukukucaphukisa. Uqala ukuqaphela iziphumo zempawu yokuqala kaRosenberg ngokubhekisele kukungahoywa. Iyafumba ikwenza uzive ngathi ulivili lesithathu kubudlelwane esele bukhona.
Uya kuzifumana usengxakini yokuziphatha ngokuzingca ngokufuna ukophula umsantsa phakathi kweqabane lakho kunye nosapho. Iimbono eziphosakeleyo zonke zibangelwe kule ngxaki. Kuya kubonakala ngathi kukhetho olukhoyo, eyona imbi kakhulu yenza ukuba iqabane lakho likhethe phakathi kosapho kunye nawe.
Zininzi izinto ezikhohlisayo ezichaphazelekayo kubudlelwane obuhlanganisiweyo. Kungenxa yoko le nto ngamanye amaxesha xa elinye iqela lifuna ukolula amaphiko alo, umntu othile ubabuyisela umva kulo.
Nalu uluhlu lwezinto ezinokuhamba ngengqondo yakho.
- Kuba oko kunje ngonaphakade, akukho mngcipheko mncinci weziphumo.
- Akukho nto ingafanelekanga iqhubekayo, Yinto eqhelekileyo ukuba iintsapho zisondelelane, ezinye zingaphezulu kwezinye.
- Ulwalamano lwakho lwangoku lukwelinye iligi kunosapho lwabo, kodwa ekuhambeni kwexesha luya kuphucula kwaye lufikelele kwinqanaba.
- Amalungu osapho anyanzelisiweyo anomdla kuphela kwimpilo-ntle yomntu ngamnye kunye nosapho xa lulonke, akukho sizathu sisisiseko sokuziphatha okubi.
- Kuphosakele ukulungisa ubudlelwane obomeleleyo. Luhlobo nje lothando.
Nawuphi na umntu oqiqayo uya kuza nesinye okanye ezimbalwa kwezi zigqibo. Baza kuzama ukuthula ilizwi entlokweni yabo ukuba kukho into engalunganga ngokuziqinisekisa ukuba bayasebenza kakhulu. Naliphi na isenzo kwicala labo liya kukhokelela kwimpikiswano engamenywanga.
Kubudlelwane obudibeneyo, lelinye lala maxesha apho intuition yakho ichanekile. Izigqibo zakho ezisengqiqweni zonke ziingcamango eziphosakeleyo ngokubanzi. Uya kufumanisa kwakamsinya okanye kamva into osele uyazi kodwa uyala ukuyamkela.