Iingcebiso ezi-5 zokujongana noMyeni ovaliweyo ngokweemvakalelo

Umbhali: Peter Berry
Umhla Wokudalwa: 20 Eyekhala 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 1 Eyekhala 2024
Anonim
Iingcebiso ezi-5 zokujongana noMyeni ovaliweyo ngokweemvakalelo - I-Psychology
Iingcebiso ezi-5 zokujongana noMyeni ovaliweyo ngokweemvakalelo - I-Psychology

Umxholo

Kwasekuqaleni kuka-2000, i-ABC yenze umboniso “Isidanga sokuQala” kunye ne “The Bachelorette” inyani ibonisa uhambo lomntu ongafanelekanga kwimfuno yabo yothando.

Kwiminyaka elishumi elinesithandathu kamva, abalandeli balo mboniso, bezibiza ngothando, "iBachelor Nation", bayaqhubeka nokuhlala bethetha rhoqo ngeveki ukubukela abaxhasi abangama-25 bekhuphisana nentliziyo ka-Bachelor okanye ka-Bachelorette.

Ukuvumela iindonga zakho zeemvakalelo ziwe phantsi

Ukuba ukhe walungisa isiqendu, kunokwenzeka ukuba uqaphele imixholo eqhelekileyo kunye namabinzana aphindaphindwayo. Ukongeza ukuva amabinzana athi, "Ungayamkela le rose?" Kwaye "ndiyazibona ndithandana", kukho ireferensi ubuncinci kwisiqendu ngasinye malunga nokuba sesichengeni ngokwasemoyeni kwaye "ukuvumela iindonga zakho ziwe."


Ukulawula ubudlelwanengobukrelekrele bemvakalelo

Ngalo lonke ixesha lonyaka, ayisoze iyasilela ukundothusa into yokuba iBachelor okanye i "Bachelorette" kwangoko ibonakale ingazukungena kulowo uvaleleke ngokwasemphefumlweni, ngelixa ebabongoza iveki neveki ukuba babuthathaka ngokwasemphefumlweni kwaye "mabathobe iindonga zabo. ”

Ubukrelekrele bemvakalelo kukukwazi ukuchonga iimvakalelo, ukwahlula kunye nokuzimakisha ngokufanelekileyo, kunye nokuzisebenzisa ukukhokela ukucinga nokuziphatha.

Ubukrelekrele bemvakalelo buvumela umntu ukuba azi, aqonde indlela yokunxibelelana kwezentlalo, kunye nokulawula ubudlelwane ngobulumko kunye novelwano.

Ukubeka udonga ngendlela ekhuselayo

Kuthetha ntoni ukuvalwa ngokwasemphefumlweni? Xa umntu evaliwe abavumeli ukuba babuthathaka ngokwasemphefumlweni, okanye basondele nakubani na, njengoko besoyika ukwenzakala, ngamanye amaxesha kungenxa yemeko yezentlalo okanye ukutolikwa kwabo okwahlukileyo kokudibana kwabantu.


Zininzi izinto ezinokuba nefuthe elibi kubukrelekrele bemvakalelo ebuntwaneni, kubandakanya ukwenzakala ngokweemvakalelo, ukungaxhomekeki kubazali, kunye nokungahoywa ngokweemvakalelo. Ebudaleni, ukuthintela ukuba semngciphekweni ngokweemvakalelo kunokubandakanya ukuphathwa gadalala ngokweemvakalelo, usizi, ukukrexeza, kunye nokungathembeki, njengoko abantu "bebeka iindonga zabo" ngendlela ekhuselayo.

Ngokwesiqhelo, abasetyhini banomda kunamadoda kwizinto zobukrelekrele beemvakalelo kwaye bahlala betsaleleka kubantu abagadiweyo ngokweemvakalelo. Aba bafazi bathandana kwaye batshata la madoda angafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo ngokuzithemba kunye nokuzimisela "kokudiliza iindonga zakhe."

Njengokujongana nendoda engafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo kunokuba ngumceli mngeni kwaye inzima, aba bafazi ekugqibeleni bayavuma kwaye bazifumane bebambeke kwimitshato nabayeni abavaliweyo. Ukuhlala nendoda engafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo kunokuba yirhafu enkulu emfazini kodwa babonakalise ithemba kwaye bazame ukutshintsha iqabane elivalwe ngokweemvakalelo.


Kwangokunjalo, kuhlala kunjalo iBachelorette iya kuthi ngokuqinisekileyo ibenayo enye yezi mphembeleli zingafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo kwezi zintathu zokugqibela, ngelixa ngamanye amaxesha zibakhetha ekugqibeleni.

Ithemba elingenampilo, nelingagungqiyo

Kuya kufuneka ubatyabeke aba bafazi ngenxa yethemba labo elingenakugungqiswa, kodwa ndiyazibuza nokuba bakude baqwalasele ukuba kungenzeka "ukudiliza" iindonga kunokuba nzima kunokuba bebekulindele. Aba bafazi bashiyeka bezibuza, "uzidiliza njani iindonga zakhe zeemvakalelo?" Ukucinga ukuba ungaxhuma njani kwindoda engafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo? Nazi izixhobo zokudiliza eziluncedo.

Nangona kunjalo, ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba uyiBachelorette, okanye umfazi ojongana nendoda engafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo, ndikunika izixhobo zokudiliza ukukunceda udilize iindonga zakhe kwaye uphucule ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo kule nkqubo.

1. Nika isithuba

Xa amadoda erhoxa ngokweemvakalelo, kuhlala kungokwemvelo ukuba abafazi bazingise kumyeni ongafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo.

Kumdlalo ogqwethekileyo, ojikelezayo womtshato "Ikati kunye neMouse", umyeni ongafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo uyabaleka, umfazi engayeki ukulandela, ebangela ukuba umyeni abaleke ngakumbi kunye nenkosikazi ukuba ilandele ngokukhawuleza. Elona qhinga lilungileyo kukuvumela umyeni wakho ongafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo indawo ayifunayo ukuze abone ukuvalwa kwakhe ngokweemvakalelo.

Amadoda angafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo akha iindonga ngesizathu, njengoko kungoyena mzamo wabo uphezulu wokuthintela iintlungu ezingakumbi zeemvakalelo. Iindonga zawo zibavumela ukuba bazikhusele kwaye bazilawule kwimikhosi engaphandle enokubenzakalisa, okanye ibenze bangabi namandla ngokwasemphefumlweni.

Ngaba amadoda angafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo ayatshintsha? Akukho mpendulo ilula kwaye ichanekileyo kuloo nto kodwa eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuhlonipha iindonga zabo, uqonde ukuba kutheni zikhona, kwaye uvumele indawo iqabane lakho ukuba lisebenze ngemicimbi yeemvakalelo.

Ukusweleka kukatat'omyeni womyeni wam, wadlula kwinkqubo ebuhlungu kakhulu apho angazange afumaneke ngokweemvakalelo kangangexesha elithile.

Kwiintsuku ezilandela ukusweleka kukaTatomkhulu wakhe, bendisoloko ndibuza umyeni wam ukuba ulungile na ngelixa ndibuza ukuba ndingenza ntoni ukumenza azive engcono. Ewe, kwakungekho nto ndinokuyenza ukubuyisa utatomkhulu wakhe okanye ukunciphisa inkqubo yakhe yokuba lusizi, kodwa kwandithatha iiveki ezininzi ukuyifumana loo nto.

Okokugqibela, ndafunda ukuvumela umyeni wam ongafumanekiyo ngokwasemoyeni indawo ayidingayo ukuze asebenze kwaye aqwalasele iimvakalelo zakhe, eziye zakhokelela ekubeni afune inkxaso.

Ukunika umyeni wakho ongafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo indawo engacinezelwanga ukuba aqhubekeke neemvakalelo zakhe kuya kubanika ithuba lokukukhumbula kwaye ekugqibeleni bakukhangele.

2. Ubukho beemvakalelo

Eli cebiso linokubonakala liyindida kakhulu ekunikeni indawo kumyeni ongafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo, kodwa enyanisweni, kufuneka isetyenziswe ngokudibeneyo nendawo. Ngelixa uvumela iqabane lakho indawo eliyifunayo, qiniseka ukuba ubakhona ngokweemvakalelo xa eziva ekhuselekile ngokwaneleyo ukuba angasondela.

Zama ukubeka ecaleni intlungu yakho kwaye ube nentliziyo evulekileyo ngelixa exoxa ngoxinzelelo, uxinzelelo kunye noloyiko. Oku kunokuba nzima, njengoko ndiqinisekile ukuba imeko yakho iya kuba nokwabelana neyakho. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba uyothula umthwalo ngokwasemphefumlweni, kusenokwenzeka ukuba angaphoswa ngokweemvakalelo kwaye abuyele ngokukhawuleza kwakhona.

Ngonxibelelwano ngalunye olunempumelelo, luya kubhalisa kwingqondo yakhe njengelinye ixesha intliziyo yakhe ikhuselekile kwaye ikhuselwe kunye nawe ngexesha lomngcipheko wengqondo.

3. Uyakwenza

Enye indlela onokunceda ngayo umyeni wakho ovaliweyo ngokweemvakalelo kukuba "Uyakwenza Wena." Kuyacaphukisa ngokumangalisayo ukusilela kulawulo, ke ngoko funa ulawulo kwimimandla apho unayo. Ungathini kumntu ongafumanekiyo ngokwasemphefumlweni? Ukuba indoda yakho ifuna indawo mayibe njalo, kodwa kubalulekile ukuqonda umahluko phakathi kokuzibandakanya ngokupheleleyo kunye nemfuno yendawo efanelekileyo ixesha elimiselweyo.

Ke yeyiphi eyona nto iphambili ukuyenza, xa ulibonile iqabane lakho njengendoda engafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo?

Yomeleza imeko yakho yeemvakalelo ngokuzibekela kunye nokufezekisa iinjongo, ukuzibandakanya kwizinto ozithandayo kunye nezinto onomdla kuzo, kunye nokunxulumana nabantu "abakuzalisa ngokweemvakalelo". Ukuba wonwabile, uzithembile, kwaye ukhona ngokwasemoyeni, umyeni wakho uya kukubona njengesibane esomeleleyo kwaye uya kuba nokuphazamiseka ukukuthintela ekubekeni ingqalelo yakho kuye.

Xa umyeni wam ebhujelwe ngutatomkhulu wakhe, ndiziva ngathi ndichithe umzuzu ngamnye wokuvuka ndizikhathaza ngaye kwaye ndizama ukungenelela.

Kwezi veki zimbalwa zokuqala, ugxininiso lwam lwalugcinwe kuye ngokusisigxina kunye nokunye. Incoko nabahlobo bam babethandana neengcebiso malunga nendlela yokumenza azive engcono, ixesha lam lichithwe kuphandwa ngosizi, kwaye umdla wam oyinyani ubekelwa bucala kwindawo enqatyisiweyo kwikona.

Okokugqibela, ndathi ndakubethwa yintsomi yam, ndafunda ukuziphazamisa ngokufunda, ukuphuma nabahlobo, kunye nokuzama ukufunda iSpanish ngexesha lam lokuphumla. Ngelishwa, iSpanish endizifundisayo sasifana no "Spanglish", kodwa ngombulelo indincedile ukuhambisa ixesha kwaye ndingagxili kakhulu kumyeni wam.

Ke, andinakugxininisa ukubaluleka kokukwenza ngelixa ulinde iqabane lakho ukuba lize.

4. Ixabiso nokuxabisa

Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukunika indawo kunye nokutshintsha kugxile kuwe akuthethi ukuba uyabanda, okanye ukude ngokweemvakalelo kuye. Qhubeka nokulinganisa uxabiso lwakho ngaye kwaye ufake ulwazelelo emtshatweni wakho.

Khuthaza kwaye ubonise ukuba uyamxabisa ngokumbonisa ngezinto ezincinci zobubele suku ngalunye. Ndingathanda ukuhlala ndicacisa naluphi na uhlobo lokugxekwa, nokuba oko kwakuthetha ukuba kuyakha, kwaye ndinqene nezinto ezimbi.

Ukuba sele esebenza ngenkqubo yakhe yeemvakalelo, sele ebuthathaka kwaye akazukuphendula kakuhle kulwamkelo lwalo naluphi na uhlobo.

5. Funa uncedo xa kukho imfuneko

Masijongane nayo, ubomi bunzima, abunakulindelwa, kwaye butshintsha ngonaphakade.

Kanye xa ucinga ukuba unezinto kunye kwaye onke amadada akho elandelelana, kwenzeka into engenakuphepheka ebangela ukuba amadada akho aphume ngokungahambelani ngokupheleleyo.

Ukucebisa umntu ngamnye kunokukunceda ngempendulo esebenzayo kunye nokuqinisekiswa, ngelixa ingcebiso nganye inokunceda iqabane lakho ukuba liphonononge ukuba kwakutheni ukuze kwakhiwe iindonga zakhe, ukuba uwuchaphazela njani umtshato wakhe, nokuba angazidiliza njani.

Ukucetyiswa emtshatweni nako kunokuba luncedo, nokuba endaweni okanye ukongeza kwiingcebiso zomntu ngamnye. Ukucetyiswa emtshatweni kuyakubandakanya umntu wesithathu oqeqeshiweyo ukukunceda wena neqabane lakho ukuba nenze iimvakalelo, nikhuthaze ukuqonda, kunye nezisombululo.