Umxholo
- 1. Uloyiko lokuphulukana neqabane lakho
- 2. Ukuzithemba okuphantsi, okanye ukungazithembi okanye iipateni zokuziphatha ezinemvakalelo
- 3. UbuNarcissism
- 4. Ukuziphatha ngokuzimeleyo
- 4. Ubuxoki okanye indlela yokuziphatha
- 5. Ukuziphatha kakuhle
- 6. Ukuxhomekeka kwiqabane lakho
Baninzi abantu abakholelwa ukuba umona luphawu lothando, ayikho enye into, akukho nto ingaphantsi. Kodwa xa uyeka ukuqaphela umona kulo lonke uzuko lwawo utyhila eyona nto ibangela umona. Sifumanisa ukuba ngasemva kwe-facade yothando yingqokelela yokungaqiniseki enokuza ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo.
Musa ukukholelwa kuthi?
Chitha ixesha ujonge ezona zibini zibalaseleyo zikungqongileyo- izibini ozaziyo zikubudlelwane obunothando, obunempilo nobonwabileyo. Kwaye ukuba ngokwenene banelisekile njengoko kubonakala ngathi uya kufumana ukungabikho komona kunye namabhakethi okuthembela, ukhuseleko kunye nokusondelelana, okuchasene ngokupheleleyo nomona.
Ke ukuba umona ayilothando, ubangelwa yintoni?
Ngalo lonke eli nqaku, siza kuqwalasela ngokufutshane ezinye zezinto ezibalulekileyo ezibangela umona.
Khawukhumbule nje, ukuba umona uyingxaki kuwe, kwaye unokunxibelelana nayo nayiphi na le micimbi, awuwedwa. Awunguye umntu 'ombi', kodwa unomsebenzi ekufuneka uwenze kuwe ukuze ukwazi ukulungisa iingxaki kwaye wonwabele uhlobo olusempilweni lobudlelwane esele sithethe ngalo kweli nqaku.
Sithembe ukuba kufanelekile ukwenza umzamo.
1. Uloyiko lokuphulukana neqabane lakho
Uloyiko lokuphulukana neqabane lakho kunye neminye imiba edweliswe ngezantsi inokuba yeyona nto ibangela umona.
Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuba ubungoyiki ukuphulukana neqabane lakho, ngekhe ubenomona xa iqabane lakho ligxile komnye umntu. Kodwa olu loyiko, ukuze lube ngumona, kunokwenzeka ukuba ludityaniswe neminye imiba.
2. Ukuzithemba okuphantsi, okanye ukungazithembi okanye iipateni zokuziphatha ezinemvakalelo
Ukuba woyika ukuphulukana neqabane lakho kwaye ufumana ukuzithemba okuphantsi, okanye ungaziva ulungile ngokwaneleyo ukuba ungaba neqabane lakho, kulula ukuqonda ukuba kutheni unokuba nomona.
Enye yeendlela esibonisa ukungazithembi ngayo kukungakhathali okanye iindlela zokuziphatha eziyimfuneko.
3. UbuNarcissism
AbakwaNarcissist balindele ukuba amaqabane abo abe nawo onke amehlo kubo, abanakuba nayo nayiphi na enye indlela kwaye abanakuqonda ukuba le yindlela yokuziphatha engalunganga kubudlelwane.
Ukuba iqabane labo linxibelelana nabanye ngendlela iqabane labo elingathandekiyo elingayithandiyo, iqabane labo linokujika libe ngumona njengendlela yokulawula.
4. Ukuziphatha ngokuzimeleyo
Ngamanye amaxesha kusenokwenzeka ukuba iqabane elinomona lisoyika ukuphulukana nawe, endaweni yoko, banokoyika ukungabonakali njengeyona 'nto ibalaseleyo'.
Le ndlela yokuziphatha inokwenzeka phakathi kwamaqela obuhlobo, okanye phakathi kwamaqabane eqela labantakwenu.
4. Ubuxoki okanye indlela yokuziphatha
Ukuba iqabane liyaxoka okanye liyakopela, amathuba okuba abe nomona kunye neqabane labo kuba baveza uloyiko lwabo lokuqhathwa, okanye ityala kubo.
Kwangokunjalo, ukuba iqabane elimsulwa lithatha imiqondiso yokuxoka okanye utshintsho kubudlelwane, banokuba ngamahlwempu kwaye babe nomona ngenxa yeemvakalelo, ukungazithembi kunye neparanoia.
5. Ukuziphatha kakuhle
Abanye abantu abayazi indlela yokuphumla xa ujonge into okanye umntu abamxabisileyo, kwaye ke baba zizinto.
IiHoarders yimizekelo yoku, njengabantu abanokuthi babambe imali yabo kude okanye bangabelani ngento abanayo ininzi nabanye.
Oku kuziphatha kunokubangelwa kukungazithembi, isitayile sokuncamathisela, isimilo esonakeleyo okanye imeko yokunqongophala ekunokwenzeka ukuba ikhule ebuntwaneni kwaye ayizange ilungiswe.
Kule meko, iqabane lomntu onomona yipropathi yabo, kwaye isimilo sokuziphatha yindlela abayekisa ngayo iqabane labo ekwabelaneni nabanye, ngaloo ndlela begcina ingqalelo yabo kwiqabane labo.
6. Ukuxhomekeka kwiqabane lakho
Abanye abantu bazibeka kwindawo apho baxhomekeke kumaqabane abo.
Ukuxhomekeka kwabo kunokubangelwa yinto encinci enje ngokuba baxhomekeke kumaqabane abo ukuze baqhubeke nokuzithemba, okanye bazive bekhuselekile emhlabeni. Kodwa banokuhambisa ubomi babo bonke ukuba babe neqabane labo ukuze baxhomekeke ngokupheleleyo kwiqabane labo ngazo zonke iindlela.
Abanye abantu banokuxhomekeka ngokungeyomfuneko ngelixa abanye ngokwendalo besenza njalo, umzekelo, ukuba ubenomntwana neqabane lakho kwaye uhlala ekhaya ukukhulisa abantwana okanye ukuncancisa uxhomekeke ngelo xesha.
Ukuxhomekeka kunokubonisa ngokugula okanye ngokukhubazeka.
Xa uxhomekeke kakhulu kuninzi onokubeka emngciphekweni ukuba ubudlelwane buqhawukile - hayi nje ukuphulukana nothando. Oluxhomekeko lunokujika lube lixhala lokuphulukana neqabane lakho kunye nendlela ophila ngayo kwaye, emva koko, kunokuboniswa ngomona.
Le yimizekelo nje embalwa yento ebangela umona ngenene, imeko nganye inokuba yahlukile njengokuba unjalo, uninzi lweemeko zekhwele zenzeka ngenxa yokuba iqabane elinomona lingazithembanga ngandlela thile kwaye liyabanceda kakuhle ukuba bathathe isigqibo sokusebenza ukulungisa umba lowo.
Nangona kunjalo, kwezinye iimeko, umona unokwenzeka njengokuqikelela kokungazithembi ngenxa yeemeko zobomi ezinje ngeemeko zobuzali, ukukhubazeka okanye ukugula.
Ukucebisa sisisombululo esigqibeleleyo sokujongana nento ebangela umona kwaye iya kukunika ithuba lokonwabela ubomi nomntu omthandayo wonwabile kwaye usempilweni kwixa elizayo.