Umxholo
- 1. Ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho
- 2. Ukuhlala usempilweni kwaye ugxile
- 3. Izifundo zobomi ekufuneka zifundwe
- 4. Ukunxibelelana ngendlela entsha
- 5. Ukucinga ngotshintsho
- 6. Ukujonga kwikamva
Uzamile kaninzi. Usenokude ubone umcebisi womtshato kunye. Kodwa ifikelele kwinqanaba apho ungacingi ukuba imiba emtshatweni wakho inokulungiswa.
Wena nomfazi wakho nigqibe kwelokuba ukwahlukana kwesilingo kuya kuba linyathelo elilandelayo.
Ewe, ukuba nexesha elithe chatha omnye komnye kunokukunika zombini ukucaciswa malunga nemeko yakho: ukuba yonakala phi, kwaye kufuneka wenze ntoni ngoku ukuya phambili ngomonakalo omncinci wesibambiso kangangoko.
Nangona kunjalo, ukwahlukana emtshatweni akunakuze kube lula kwaye unokuziva unogqabhuko lweemvakalelo ezinokwenza ukujongana nokwahlukana nomfazi wakho kubenzima kakhulu.
Ukuba eyakho Umfazi ufuna ukwahlukana kodwa angawuqhawuli umtshato usenokuba nethuba lokuphumelela kuye kwaye uphinde wakhe ubudlelwane bakho.
Kodwa nokuba kwenzeka ntoni kusafuneka ufunde indlela yokujongana nokwahlukana emtshatweni kwaye wenze olu tshintsho lube lula kuwe apha ziingcebiso ezimbalwa zendlela yokujongana nokwahlukana
1. Ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho
Inyathelo lokuqala lendlela yokuphatha ukwahlukana komtshato kukwamkela ukuba eli iya kuba lixesha elibuhlungu, elizele ziimvakalelo ebomini bakho. Ukuphela kolwalamano olubaluleke kakhulu onalo njengomntu omdala yipilisi enzima ukuyiginya.
Sukuba nzima kuwe ukuba uzive uphantsi, ulusizi, unexhala, unomsindo, okanye uxinezelekile. Zikhumbuze ukuba ezi mvakalelo ziqhelekile. Ubumthanda umfazi wakho, kwaye ukuthandile ukutshata de izinto zonakala.
Zivumele uzive ezi zinto, nokuba uluntu luxelela amadoda ukuba "omelele" kwaye ayoyise.
Funa uncedo lwangaphandle ukuba ufumanisa ukuba awukwazi ukugqibezela imisebenzi yesiqhelo yemihla ngemihla, enjengokuzilungisa, ukuya emsebenzini, ukunxibelelana nabanye. Akukho ntloni ngokuba nomcebisi okanye ugqirha akuncede kule ndlela.
Kuhlala kuluncedo ukuba nomntu wesithathu ongathathi cala ukuthetha ngezinto, kwaye kuya kukunceda uzive ngathi unendawo ekhuselekileyo yokukhupha ngaphandle kokubandakanya nabaphi na abahlobo bakho "bokwenene".
2. Ukuhlala usempilweni kwaye ugxile
Xa ujongana nokwahlukana kubalulekile ukuba ugcine indlela yokuphila esempilweni njengoko uhamba ngeli xesha lobuthathaka. Oku kuthetha ukutya kakuhle, ukulala ngokwaneleyo, kunye nokwenza umthambo.
Ukuhamba komzimba kunokuba luncedo njengakwi-anti-depressants, ke qiniseka ukuba ufumana intshukumo ebalulekileyo yosuku ngalunye. Ukuba nesiqhelo kuya kukwenza uzive ugxile, ngakumbi xa izinto ziqala ukuziva zingaphandle kolawulo lwakho.
Yenza ixesha lokuthandaza, ukuba utyekele kakhulu, okanye olunye uqeqesho lokucamngca; umzuzu xa unokuzizisa kumbindi wakho kwaye uzolise ingqondo yakho.
Ngaba uyasidlala isixhobo somculo? Yenza ixesha lokuziqhelanisa! Ukuba awukaziphuhlisi izakhono zokujongana noxinzelelo, lo iya kuba lithuba elihle lokwenza njalo.
Kukho izixhobo ezigqwesileyo kwi-intanethi nakwivenkile yakho yendawo ezinokukunceda ufunde iindlela ezilungileyo zokujongana noxinzelelo. Kunqande ukuzama ukuzibamba ngokutya, iziyobisi okanye utywala.
Oku akuyi kukwenza uzive ungcono kwixesha elide kwaye kunokukhokelela kwimiceli mngeni emininzi.
Khumbula xa ujongene nokwahlukana emtshatweni: ukuzivula ngokwakho kubuhlungu kunenzuzo, ngokweengcali zobudlelwane, kwaye kuya kukunceda kwindlela yakho eya ekuphiliseni.
3. Izifundo zobomi ekufuneka zifundwe
Ukuba umfazi wakho ufuna ukwahlukana unokulingwa ukuba udwelise zonke iziphene zomfazi wakho kunye nokusilela kwakhe xa uphume nabahlobo bakho, ayizukukwenza uzive ungcono, kwaye enyanisweni, iya kuvutha amadangatye okonzakala nangakumbi.
Thatha indlela ephezulu kwaye ugcine umsindo kwiiseshoni zakho zonyango, apho ingcali eqeqeshiweyo inokukunceda uguqukele umsindo kwaye wenzakalise ube yinto enemveliso kunye nesisombululo.
Kukho izifundo ezibalulekileyo zobomi ezinokufundwa ngoku, kwaye uya kufuna ukungena kwezi.
Xa umfazi wakho ephuma kuwe ngenene yindlela ebuhlungu yobomi, kodwa unokukhetha ukuyibona njengethuba lokuchaza iinjongo zakho zothando, amaphupha akho, kunye nokukwazi kwakho ukusebenza ngothando neqabane.
Xa uthetha nomfazi wakho, khumbula ukuba naye ubuhlungu. Nobabini nathandana kwaba kanye kwaye nabelana ngombono womtshato ophumelelayo, owonwabileyo.
Ukufumana ulwimi lokunxibelelana ngokuzolileyo nangokwakhayo kunye nenkosikazi yakho njengoko nisenza iinkcukacha zokwahlukana kwenu kuya kubaluleka.
Mhlawumbi unabahlobo bakho abaye baqhawula umtshato baphuma bengenzakalanga. Babuze ukuba bajamelana njani nokwahlukana, kwaye bathathe awona magama asebenzisekayo omnye komnye.
Abantu abenzakalisayo bahlala befuna ukulimazana, kodwa ufuna ukukhumbula ukugcina ukutshintshiselana kwakho njengoluntu kangangoko ukuze nibe nobabini nimamele kwaye nihlonitshwe.
Le yenye indawo apho ukubiza ingcali, ngendlela yonyango, kunokuba luncedo.
4. Ukunxibelelana ngendlela entsha
Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba umsindo uyakuthintela ekunxibelelaneni ngendlela eyakhayo, unganqwenela ukunciphisa ukutshintshiselana kwakho nge-imeyile okwexeshana.
Ukuthumela i-imeyile omnye komnye kunenzuzo yokukuvumela cingisisa kwaye ujonge amagama akho ngaphambi kokuwathumela. (Ngamanye amaxesha kubushushu bengxoxo, singasilela kule ngcinga kwaye sithethe izinto esiza kuzisola ngazo kamva.)
Ukuthumela i-imeyile yindlela elungileyo yokugcina umzila wephepha wento ekwakugqityiwe kwaye kwavunyelwana ngayo, ukuba kuya kufuneka uphinde ubhekise emva kulo mhla.
Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba unxibelelwano lonakele ngenene, sebenzisa igqwetha lakho ukunxibelelana nomfazi wakho.
Ngelixa kungabiza ngaphezulu ukugqitha kwigqwetha lakho kunokuthetha ngqo nenkosikazi yakho, iindleko zinokulungela impilo yakho yengqondo kunye nengqondo yakho. Cinga ngale ndleko njengokuzinakekela.
5. Ukucinga ngotshintsho
Ukwahlukana lutshintsho. Awusaphili njengesibini mihla le. Iimeko zakho zezemali ziya kutshintshwa. Indlela olichitha ngayo ixesha lakho lokucoca liya kutshintsha.
Kusenokufuneka uthwale uxanduva ngakumbi ngokubhekisele ebantwaneni. Zilungiselele le nto intsha. Ngelixa inokuba yinto ojonge phambili kuyo, yazi ukuba uya kuba namaxesha okuzisola kwaye ukulungele oku.
Akukho seti yesibini yezandla-on-deck xa unomntwana ogulayo ofuna ukuhlala ekhaya kwaye uyafuneka emsebenzini.
Qalisa ukubeka uhlobo oluthile lwesakhelo sokugcina izinto-nokuba kukwimo yomnye umntu omdala (omnye wabazali bakho, omnye wootatomkhulu babantwana) okanye uncedo oluhlawulelwayo (umongikazi okanye umgcini wendlu).
6. Ukujonga kwikamva
Eli xesha lobomi bakho liya kuzaliswa ziimvakalelo ezixubeneyo. Uyakonwabela ukubona ukuphela komtshato ongonwabanga, kodwa uyoyika ukuphuma uye kwindawo engaziwayo.
Iya kuba luncedo jonga eli xesha njengethuba lokukhula kunye neenguqu ezintle. Yenza isijwili sokuphulukana nomtshato wakho, kodwa wamkele ikamva lakho.
Kuyacaca phaya, kwaye nezifundo ozifundileyo emtshatweni wakho, nokuba yeyiphi ekugqibeleni ayiphumelelanga, iya kukunceda ube yindoda engcono kunye neqabane.