Umxholo
- Ufanele ujongane njani nayo?
- Imithetho emibini elula inokulandelelana:
- Ukwakha ulwalamano olusenyongweni
Uthando lokwenene luyabonakala ngendlela olusenza sizive ngayo. Uthando lumele luzive lumnandi. Kukho umgangatho woxolo kumava okwenene othando angena kumbindi wethu, echukumisa inxenye yethu ebisoloko ikho. Uthando lokwenene lusenza sisebenze ngaphakathi, lusigcwalise ngobushushu nokukhanya. ” Ingxelo yomtshato
Ezintliziyweni zethu, yile nto siyinqwenelayo kubudlelwane. Yiyo le nto isibizayo, yintoni esikhulisayo, esisigcinayo.
Ngelixa singawazi la maxesha axabisekileyo kubudlelwane-inokuba yayiyeyona nto iqale ulwalamano kwasekuqaleni-sinokwazi amaxesha apho into ethile ngaphakathi ngaphakathi ikhululeka kwaye umhlaba wethu uqala ukutyhileka. Imililo yokusondela kunye nolwalamano olusondeleyo luqala ukophula imiqobo esezintliziyweni zethu kwaye nezinto zethu zomthunzi ziyavela.
Kukule ndawo apho izibini zijongana nomceli mngeni wokusebenza kunye nomothuko onokuthi ufihle, ulinde ukuvulwa, kwaye ulinde ukukhutshwa. Lo ngumzuzu xa izibini zijongana nesigqibo sokwenza ubudlelwane babe sisitya kunye nesithuthi sokukhula komntu kunye nokomoya. Ngumzuzu olungileyo. Ngumzuzu obeka ikhosi malunga nendlela izibini ezisebenza kunye kunye nezinto ezinzulu zobomi.
Ufanele ujongane njani nayo?
Inyathelo lokuqala kukwamkela ukuba into enzulu ikhuthazekile, ukuba ezinye ziyacinezelwa ziimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo emzimbeni, kunye nokuzisa ulwazi, uthando kunye nomonde kwizinto ezivelayo. Rhoqo, izibini ezikhawulezayo ziligqitha ithuba kwaye ziqale ukuzikhusela ukuthintela ukwenzakala ngakumbi ukuba kungenzeki. Sisenokucaphuka ngomnye umntu; chaza iziphoso zabo, kwaye ususe ingqalelo kwiinkqubo zethu ziye kwezabo.
Imithetho emibini elula inokulandelelana:
1. “Wonke umntu uyageza kulwalamano. Tshintshanani nje! ” (ukusuka eTerrence Real)
2. Nika ingqalelo kwiimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo kwimizimba yakho.
Ukuzama ukuba kubudlelwane obusondeleyo nomnye umntu osebenza ngokwenzakala (uninzi lwethu) -ngakumbi umothuko wokuncamathela-kunye nokutsha ngenxa yeebhloko zomntu kunzima kakhulu.
UPeter Levine, enye yeengcali eziphambili kwezomothuko, uthi, “Kubantu abaninzi abenzakeleyo, umzimba wabo ulutshaba. Amava phantse alo naliphi na uvakalelo atolikwa njengembonakalo engamenywanga yoloyiko oluhlaziyiweyo kunye nokungabikho koncedo. ”
Ukuba sifuna ubudlelwane bokwenyani apho sonke sibonisa khona, kungekudala kuya kufuneka sabelane ngenxalenye yethu eyenzakeleyo kunye nolwalamano lwethu. Ngaphandle koko, ubudlelwane buya kujongeka buhle kwaye buzinzile ngaphandle kodwa abuyi kubamba phantsi koxinzelelo. Kwaye kuya kuziva ngathi kukho into ebalulekileyo elahlekileyo.
Iqabane lethu kuya kufuneka linyamezele ukutshintsha okungalawulekiyo phakathi kokulungelelaniswa kakuhle kunye nokuzenzakalisa kwethu-kunye nokuhamba kwayo, uloyiko kunye nomsindo. Umlingane wethu kuya kufuneka ajongane nomqolomba wethu kunye nengozi eza nawo-hayi nje uhlobo oluthandekayo, oluthandekayo. Ngexesha kunye nokuzilolonga, nangona kunjalo, isibini sinokufunda "ukungena emqolombeni" kunye.
Ukwenza oku, qalisa kwiidosi ezincinci. Bekela bucala ixesha lokuya kwiimvakalelo ezoyikisayo kunye neemvakalelo kunye neqabane lakho likho. Cotha izinto. Buza iqabane lakho ukuba ngaba lifuna ukuthatha ixesha lokuziva izinto ngakumbi ngakumbi. Ngelixa sinokwenza oku kunyango, kuya kufuneka sifunde ukwenza oku nabanye-zombini njengendlela yokufumana amava kunye nendlela yokwenyani kubudlelwane obuzinikeleyo. Rhoqo, inxeba elixhwalekisayo liba lolwalamano kwaye ukuphilisa kufuneka kube kukuhlobana. Funda kunye ukuba ungayifumana njani indlela yakho.
Iqabane elinobuchule liyayazi indlela yokuba nala maxesha axhokonxileyo. Fumana iindlela zokuhlala kufutshane kodwa ungasondeli kakhulu, ukuthetha ezinye kodwa hayi kakhulu. Cela iqabane lakho ukuba lithathe ukulunywa kancinci kwintlungu kwaye emva koko ubuye uzokwazisa ngokuziva kwabo emzimbeni wabo ehleli esofeni. Funda indlela yokuzilungisa ngokwakho xa ungayifumani kakuhle. Umlingane wakho, naye, angatsho ukuba yintoni efunekayo kwaye yintoni emsebenzelayo ukuba angene emqolombeni wabo.
Ukwakha ulwalamano olusenyongweni
Ukukhetha ukubandakanya iintlungu kunokuba ubumnandi kuphela kubudlelwane kunzima, kodwa kunokuba ngumvuzo omkhulu kwaye kunokwakha ulwalamano olusenyanisweni noluyinyani.
Ungabuza, "Kutheni le nto siza kuyenza le nto emhlabeni?" Ngamafutshane, sikwenza ngothando-kunye nokuzinikela okunzulu kwinkqubo yokukhula. Unokufumana ubulumko ngayo yonke le nto kwaye ube ngumdlezane kutshintsho lwenguqu.
Nangona kunjalo ukhetha ukuyenza, qiniseka ukuqala kancinci kwaye uyatshintshana. Sonke sinemisebenzi yokusebenza. Nokuba ngekhefu kubudlelwane bakho, unokuhlala ubuyela komnye nomnye. Nobabini ninokufunda indlela yokufumana le nto niyifunayo. Nobabini ninamava eendawo ezinzulu kakhulu ezinokwenza ubudlelwane bakho bomelele, bomelele kwaye bunzulu ngeendlela ongazange uzicinge.
Yinto abanye abayibiza ngokuba yindlela yothando olwaziyo.