Umxholo
- 1. Zazi
- 2. Khululeka xa uwedwa
- 3. Thatha uxanduva
- 4. Yamkela abanye njengoko benjalo
- 5. Yiba sengqiqweni ngobudlelwane
- 6. Thembeka kwaye ube nembeko
- 7. Khulisa okulungileyo
Ubudlelwane bungathathelwa ingqalelo busempilweni ukuba omabini amaqabane aziva exhaswa, edibene, kwaye ezimeleyo ngelixa bekunye.
Ukwakha ubudlelwane obusempilweni kunokuzisa uvuyo kunye nolwaneliseko ebomini bakho.
Ubudlelwane obuphilileyo buba lilitye lembombo, indawo apho unokuba ngokwakho kwaye uyazi ukuba uya kuxhaswa ngokupheleleyo kwaye uhlonitshwe nokuba ubomi bukuphosela ntoni na.
Kwelinye icala, ubudlelwane obungenampilo bunetyhefu kwaye bonakalisa impilo-ntle yakho ngokweemvakalelo. Ubudlelwane obungenampilo bunoxinzelelo kwaye bukushiya uziva ungazithembanga, uhlaselwa kwaye uzithandabuza.
Kodwa ungagcina njani ubudlelwane obunempilo? Ngaba ikhona imfihlo yokuba nobudlelwane obusempilweni?
Ewe, konke kuqala ngawe kunye nendlela onxibelelana ngayo nesiqu sakho, kunye nesimo sakho sengqondo kubudlelwane nakwabanye abantu. Makhe sijonge ukuba ungabuphucula njani ubudlelwane obunempilo ebomini bakho.
Inqaku labelana ngeengcebiso ezisixhenxe malunga nendlela yokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo:
1. Zazi
Yintsomi, kodwa iyinyani: Awunakho ukuba nolwalamano oluhle nabanye abantu de ube wakha ubudlelwane obunempilo nawe.
Ukugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo kuqala kuwe. Xa usazi ukuba ungubani kwaye ufuna ntoni ebomini kunye nobudlelwane, ungaqala ukukhangela ubudlelwane obulingana nezo mfuno.
Kukwabalulekile ukuba wazi ukungazithembi kwakho, ukukhathazeka, izinto ezikwenza ube nomsindo okanye zikwenze uphawule, nendlela ophendula ngayo kuxinzelelo.
Ukwazi ezi zinto kwenza kube lula ukulawula ukungqubana okunokubakho kunye nokusingatha iimeko ngobabalo.
2. Khululeka xa uwedwa
Ukuba mnandi wedwa kubalulekile ukuba ufuna ukuhlala kamnandi nomnye umntu kwaye wakhe ubudlelwane obunempilo obunothando kunye nabo. Ukuba ukhululekile wedwa, uyakufumanisa ukuba uyolo lokwaneliseka kunye nokuzingqina.
Xa ukhululekile kwaye uphelele ngaphakathi kuwe, ungangena kubudlelwane kwindawo evulekileyo, enesiseko nethembekileyo.
Awuyi kujonga ubudlelwane bokukulungisa okanye ukugcwalisa isikhewu ebomini bakho, kuba uyazi ukuba sele ufumene impilo. Endaweni yokuba ungonwabela ubudlelwane ngalunye ngoko luzisa ebomini bakho, ngaphandle kokuthembela kulo.
3. Thatha uxanduva
Unobudlelwane obusempilweni njani?
Ukuthatha uxanduva ngeemvakalelo zakho, isenzo, kunye nokuphendula ngamanyathelo abalulekileyo kubudlelwane obusempilweni.
Sonke siyacaphuka ngamanye amaxesha ngamanye amaxesha - singabantu kuphela emva kwayo yonke loo nto - kodwa sinokulawula indlela esisabela ngayo kwaye samkele uxanduva lwabo.
Nguwe kuphela onoxanduva loko ukwamkelayo kubudlelwane kunye nendlela ophatha ngayo omnye umntu.
Ukuthatha uxanduva ngobomi bakho kunye nobudlelwane bakho kukwenza uzive womelele kwaye kukukhumbuze ukuba ungumphathi wenqanawa yakho.
4. Yamkela abanye njengoko benjalo
Ulwalamano oluninzi luye lwaphela ngenxa yokuba elinye iqela lalifuna elinye lihluke. Nangona kunjalo, awunakunyanzela abanye abantu ukuba batshintshe kwaye babe ngaphezulu njengoko ufuna babe njalo. Konke onokukwenza kukubamkela njengokuba benjalo ngoku.
Ke, ukuba ufuna ukwazi ukwakha ubudlelwane obunempilo, qala ngokwamkelana.
Ukuba ufaka ubudlelwane ngamehlo avulekileyo kunye nokwamkelwa kweempawu zomlingane wakho, iintsilelo, kunye neempawu zakho, ulindelo lwakho luya kwenzeka, kwaye ubudlelwane bakho buya kusekelwa ekuhloniphaneni, hayi ekuphathweni.
5. Yiba sengqiqweni ngobudlelwane
I-Fairytale syndrome ngumbulali oqinisekisiweyo. Yonke ubudlelwane inesigaba sasemva komtshato, kwaye kumnandi kakhulu, kodwa ayisosiseko sobudlelwane bexesha elide.
Ngaba ufuna ukwazi ukuba ungagcina njani ubudlelwane busempilweni? Fumana okwenyani malunga nolwalamano lwakho kubandakanya.
Kuza kubakho amahla-ndinyuka, amatyala oza kuhlawulwa, kwaye mhlawumbi kwixa elizayo iimfuno zabantwana, ukunyuselwa, okanye ukugula. Iqabane lakho lingumntu kwaye linemikhwa ecaphukisayo (nawe ke).
Zilungiselele ubudlelwane behlabathi lokwenyani endaweni yentsomi, kwaye awuyi kuphoxeka. Uya kuba ulungele ubudlelwane obuzalisekisayo obamkela yonke imihla endaweni yokuyala.
6. Thembeka kwaye ube nembeko
Ukunyaniseka nentlonipho zezinye zezinto eziphambili kubudlelwane obusempilweni. Ukunyaniseka kwiqabane lakho kwaye ubenze babe ngabokuqala ebomini bakho kwakha ukuthembana kwaye kubakhumbuze ukuba babalulekile kuwe.
Ukunyaniseka kwenza kube lula ukuba nithembane kwaye nakhe ubudlelwane kunye.
Intlonipho kuthetha ukumamela iimfuno zomlingane wakho, inkxalabo, ithemba kunye namaphupha ngokungafihlisi nangononophelo.
Kuthetha ukufunda ukuthetha nangezinto ezibuhlungu ngaphandle kokukhohlisana omnye nomnye, kwaye kuthetha ukubeka impilo yobudlelwane bakho ngaphezulu kokuphumelela okanye ukufumana amanqaku omnye komnye.
Thetha neqabane lakho ngendlela ofuna bathethe ngayo nawe. Gxila kwiimvakalelo zakho nakwiimfuno zakho, hayi ekuzameni ukohlwaya okanye ukubenza benze ngendlela ethile.
Bukela uGqirha uEmerson Eggerichs echaza izithako ezibini zomtshato ophumeleleyo.
7. Khulisa okulungileyo
Ukuba ufuna igadi entle, uhlala uzinkcenkceshela, hayi ukhula. Ukuphuhlisa ubudlelwane obunempilo kuyafana. Khulisa kwaye ukhule okuhle komnye nomnye nakubudlelwane bakho.
Jonga konke ukuba ubudlelwane bakho busebenza njani kwaye ujonge kwezo. Yenza okungakumbi kokusebenzayo kunye nokuncinci kokungasebenziyo.
Oko kubalulekile nakwiqabane lakho. Jonga into oyithandayo kwaye uyixabise malunga nabo, kwaye ujonge kuyo. Baxelele ngayo.
Ewe kunjalo, imicimbi iya kuza ngamanye amaxesha kwaye kufuneka ijongane nayo, kodwa ubudlelwane obulungileyo bakhelwe ekuqinisekiseni nasekukhuliseni, hayi ukubangisana okanye ukufumana iimpazamo.
Ubudlelwane obuphilileyo yinto enokwenzeka kuye nabani na ozimisele ukusebenza kuye kwaye afunde izakhono zokuba kubudlelwane obusempilweni.
Ziqhelise ukunyaniseka nobubele kunye nawe ukuze ukwazi ukunxibelelana ngcono nabanye kwaye wakhe ubudlelwane obenziwe ukuba buqhubeke.