Umxholo
- Yiba neenjongo kwaye ucinge ngaphaya kwangoku nangoku
- Imeko enoxolo iququzelela ukukhuliswa okunempilo
- Kukho iziphumo ezibi zengqondo
- Uqhawulo-mtshato ayisosizathu sokuba ngumzali ongalunganga
- Iziphumo ezibi zoqhawulo mtshato ebantwaneni
- Njengomntwana, ujongana njani nabazali abalwayo?
- Iingcebiso kubazali abaqhawule umtshato
Xa ubudlelwane babo buba buhlungu, uninzi lwezibini ezitshatileyo ezinabantwana ziyacinga ukuba kungcono ukuqhawula umtshato okanye ukuhlala kunye abantwana.
Ngelixa oku kunokuvakala njengesona sisombululo sisiso, ukukhulisa umntwana kubazali abaqhawule umtshato kwindawo enengxabano nengonwabisiyo kunokuba ngumonakalo njengoqhawulo mtshato okanye kubi nangaphezulu.
Iziphumo zexesha elide zokulwa kwabazali, kubandakanya ukonyuka kobundlongondlongo kunye nentiyo ebantwaneni.
Xa abantwana bengqina abazali babo bexambulisana ngokungapheliyo, oko kungakhokelela kuphuhliso lokuzithemba okuphantsi kunye noxinzelelo phakathi kwabantwana. Iziphumo ezibi zabazali abanomsindo ebantwaneni zibandakanya imikhwa yokuzibulala kunye noxinzelelo.
Iziphumo kunye nefuthe labazali abanetyhefu zininzi kwaye ziyahluka ngokubanzi ngokwemeko, ke cinga kabini ngaphambi kokwenza isigqibo!
Yiba neenjongo kwaye ucinge ngaphaya kwangoku nangoku
Zombini ezi meko zibonisa iziphumo zoqhawulo mtshato ezibi ebantwaneni. Kuyinyani ukuba abantwana abakhuliswe ngumzali omnye basengozini yokuba phantsi kweemeko ezingathandekiyo kunabanye.
Ukusuka ekungcungcuthekisweni esikolweni ngenxa yento yokuba "abanatata okanye mama," okanye "umama notata bayalwa" ukuya kuthi ga maxa wambi kube nzima ukuba ngabantu abadala baphenjelelwa kukungabikho kwabo bobabini abazali, uqhawulo-mtshato lunokwaphula umntu!
Nangona kunjalo, eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu luhlobo lweempembelelo zengqondo zoqhawulo mtshato ebantwaneni okanye imeko engalinganiyo eyibonisayo ekuhambeni kwexesha kubantwana babazali abaqhawule umtshato.
Imeko enoxolo iququzelela ukukhuliswa okunempilo
Iimeko ezithile zibandakanya iimpendulo ezahlukeneyo.
Umzekelo, kukho iimeko apho isibini esiqhawule umtshato sijolise ekuziphatheni okufanelekileyo emntwaneni kwaye siphephe ukuzisa imicimbi yabo yobuqu ngendlela umntwana akhuliswe ngayo.
Nokuba kungumngeni ukukhulisa umntwana wedwa, ukugcina ubudlelwane obunobuchule kunye ne-ex yakho kunye nokuvumela umntwana ukuba anxibelelane nomnye lo mzali kunye nokwakha ubudlelwane bendalo kunye nabo kuya kwenza ukuba kubekho uguquko olulunge ngakumbi.
Umntwana usenokungasiqondi kwasekuqaleni isizathu sokuba abazali babo abaqhawule umtshato bengahlali kunye, kodwa eso ayisosizathu sokwenza ukuba umntwana abe neengxaki phakathi kwakho nobabini.
Unyana okanye intombi yakho ayingomhlobo / umzali wakho, onokuthi ukhalaze kuye malunga neengxaki zobudlelwane kwaye ayinguye ugqirha wezengqondo!
Nokuba umntwana ayisosizathu sokuba ubudlelwane buyeke ukusebenza!
Ngenxa yoko, umntwana wabazali abaqhawule umtshato akufuneki asindiswe yile miba kwaye kufuneka ashiywe ekhulisa ubudlelwane obunothando nabazali bobabini!
Kukho iziphumo ezibi zengqondo
Olunye lwezi zinto luphuhliso lobuntu, olubandakanyeka kwindlela abazali abaqhawule umtshato abanxibelelana ngayo kungekuphela nomntwana kodwa kunye nabanye.
Esi sesona sizathu siphambili sokuba indlela ophatha ngayo iqabane lakho ibaluleke kangaka.
Ngexesha lokukhuliswa kwabo, kubonakala ngokulula ukuba abantwana bathambekele ekulingiseni indlela yokuziphatha kunye neenkqubo zokucinga eziqwalaselwe kubazali babo.
Amagama kunye nezenzo zakho zinobunzima kungekuphela emntwini onxibelelana naye kodwa nakumntwana wakho, ongakhulanga ngokwaneleyo ukuba ahlule phakathi kwezinto ezintle okanye ezingathandekiyo ekufuneka bezenzile.
Ngaphandle koko, eli lixesha elinobuthathaka apho izinto ezingaphambili zenziwe ngokulula kumntu okhulayo, kwaye ezi zinto zandulelayo zingenza iipatheni zokuziphatha ezingafunekiyo kunye neenkolelo.
Xa umntu efikelela ebudaleni, kuba nzima ngakumbi ukulungisa iinkqubo zokucinga eziphosakeleyo okanye ukulawula ukuzibaxa.
Ke kutheni ungakuphephe ukuzikhulisa ngokupheleleyo?
Impendulo yakho enobundlobongela kumlingane wakho okanye ukulwa phambi kwabantwana inokuba yinto enokwenzeka xa umntwana ephendula ngendlela efanayo ngempazamo, ubuncinci.
Ukuba uhlala usilwa neqabane lakho kwaye kubonakala ngathi abanakukwazi ukugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo nobulungeleleneyo, endaweni yokuthobela okanye ukubandakanya umntwana wakho kwiingxabano zakho, khetha ukwahlukana kwaye uzame konke okusemandleni akho omncinci wakho ngaphandle kokutsala iinwele yonke imihla!
Uqhawulo-mtshato ayisosizathu sokuba ngumzali ongalunganga
Kwabanye, uqhawulo-mtshato yeyona ndlela ilula yokuphuma.
Ewe, umlo kunye nokuziphatha okungaphucukanga okuboniswe phambi komntwana wakho kuya kupheliswa, kodwa ikhaya elizolileyo aliqinisekisi ukukhuliswa ngaphandle koxinzelelo emntwaneni wakho.
Ukwahlula kunzima kuwo wonke umntu, kwaye kukho amanyathelo afanelekileyo ekufuneka ethathiwe ukwenza lula utshintsho kulutsha.
Ngethuba nje uhambisa imizamo yakho ekunikezeleni ubudlelwane obusempilweni kunye nothando emntwaneni wakho, ifuthe lokungabinamzali uhlala ejikeleze indlu liya kuncipha.
Kungenxa yokuba awufuni kuhlala okanye ukunxibelelana neqabane lakho kwakhona, oko akuthethi ukuba umntwana wakho makenze njalo naye.
Ngokuchasene noko, umntwana wabazali abaqhawule umtshato kufuneka avunyelwe ukuba abone kwaye akhe ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo nomzali ongekhoyo kunye nokufumana iinkcazo kunye nokuqinisekiswa ukuba ukwahlukana kwabazali akuthethi ukwahlukana kwabo nabazali.
Sikholelwa, nangasiphi na isizathu, ukuba uxanduva lwakho ngomntwana wakho luyaphela wakube ungenalo uxanduva olushiyeke kwiqabane lakho langaphambili.
Oku akuthethi ukuthumela nje imali okanye izipho ngokufuthi, kuba akukho nto inokuthatha indawo yothando olufudumeleyo, uthando okanye imfundo eqinileyo.
Ubukho bakho, uthando, kunye nokhokelo ziyimfuneko ekukhuleni komntwana wakho, kwaye ukuhlala ngaphandle akufuneki kube sisizathu.
Abanye abantu abatshatileyo bonwabile kodwa bahlala ngokwahlukana ngenxa yomsebenzi, abanye bahlala kunye nangona benqwenela ukuba bekungenjalo, kwaye abanye bayaqhawula umtshato kodwa bagcine ubudlelwane obulungeleleneyo ngenxa yabantwana babo.
Kukho ubunzima kunye nokusikelwa umda kuzo zonke, kodwa into oyikhethayo "ukubonisa" umntwana wakho ngaphandle kweemeko ezingathandekiyo sisitshixo ekukhuleni okunempilo.
Iziphumo ezibi zoqhawulo mtshato ebantwaneni
Ngaba uqhawulo mtshato alulunganga kubantwana? Iziphumo zabazali abaqhawule umtshato okanye ukulwa nabazali ebantwaneni azicimeki kwiimeko ezininzi.
Ke, uqhawulo mtshato lubachaphazela njani abantwana?
Ukukhula kunye nabazali abalwa nemikhwa yabantwana ngendlela ejongene nemiceli mngeni ekuhlaleni nakwimvakalelo kunabantwana abakhulele kwikhaya elonwabileyo.
Impixano yabazali ichaphazela umntwana kwaye ikhokelela kwiingxaki ezinzulu njengokuzithemba okuphantsi, ityala, iintloni, ukusebenza kakubi kwizifundo kunye nokubulawa kwemicimbi yezempilo.
Iziphumo ezibonakalayo zoqhawulo mtshato emntwaneni zibandakanya ukonyuka okubonakalayo kwimeko ezinxulumene nesifuba kunye nokuba sesichengeni sokwenzakala.
Njengomntwana, ujongana njani nabazali abalwayo?
Gwema ukuthatha icala kwaye uhlale ungathathi hlangothi.
Zama ukwakha ubudlelwane bakho obusempilweni, ukuba abazali bakho khange babe ngabona bantu bafanelekileyo onokujonga kubo.
Okona kubaluleke kakhulu, kuphephe ukuzibeka ityala. Ndizibuza, “Ndingabathintela njani abazali bam ekuqhawuleni umtshato?”
Impendulo elula yoku, awukwazi. Kubuhlungu ukubona abazali bakabani behlukene; nangona kunjalo, into onokuyenza kukuqinisekisa ukuba abazali bakho bayakuthanda, nokuba abathandi.
Iingcebiso kubazali abaqhawule umtshato
Kubazali, bezibuza, "ndiyeke njani ukulwa phambi komntwana wam?", Khumbula ukuba ungumnatha wokhuseleko lomntwana wakho.
Khumbula ukuzoba imigca xa uphikisana, ngokufunda ukuveza ukukhathazeka kwakho ngasese kwaye ungenzi abantwana bakho bazimamele kwiingxoxo zakho.
Ngaphandle kokungoneliseki, kubalulekile ukubonisa inkqubela phambili kubantwana bakho kwaye ubanike ingubo yokhuseleko yothando nemfudumalo.
Kubalulekile ukunqanda iimpazamo ezenziwa ngabazali abaqhawule umtshato kunye nokwahlukana ukuba kufanelekile, ngaphandle kokubenza buthathaka abantwana ngokwasemoyeni nasengqondweni.