Umxholo
- Luyintoni uloyiko lothando (Philophobia)
- Iimpawu ezi 10 ohlangabezana noloyiko lothando
- Yintoni ebangela uloyiko lothando?
- Iindlela ezili-10 zokoyisa uloyiko lothando
- 1. Jonga ngembali yakho yothando ukwaliwa
- 2. Uziva njani ngesiqu sakho?
- 3. Yeka ukumamela ilizwi elingaphakathi
- 4. Qiniseka ukuba umntu otsalelekileyo ukufanele
- 5. Ukuba sesichengeni asiyonto imbi
- 6. Zama ukuphumla ungalindeli kakhulu
- 7. Bhala phantsi indlela oziva ngayo
- 8. Yiba nombono wokuhlala ngaphandle kwalo mntu uqala ukumthanda
- 9. Myeke ulawulo
- 10.Qonda ukuba uyingxaki
- Iingcinga zokugqibela
Ukoyika uthando loloyiko lokwenene. I-phobia ngokwemiqathango yezonyango ibona uloyiko olungenangqondo okanye olugqithisileyo lwemeko, into, imvakalelo, indawo, isilwanyana, ukudala ukwethuka emntwini. Ukoyika uthando kubhekiswa kuko njenge- “philophobia.” UPhilos ungumGrike ngokuthanda, kwaye iPhobos ibonisa ukwesaba.
Izichazi magama zonyango azinamsebenzi, kwaye iingcali zinqabile ekuthetheni ngazo kuncwadi, zenza umngeni kwabo banengxaki xa bezama ukuqonda iimvakalelo zabo okanye, ngakumbi, ukujonga isikhokelo kulawulo lwephobia.
Kummandla wezonyango, uloyiko okanye i-phobias ziwela phantsi kodidi lweengxaki zoxinzelelo, nabantu babonisa kuphela iimpawu xa bejamelene noloyiko lwabo.
Kwimeko ye-philophobia, isibonakaliso kukuba abantu bafumana ubudlelwane obungenangqondo okanye obaxekileyo bengozi xa kufikwa kuthando.
Banokubanakho ukothuka kunye noxinzelelo ngengcinga nje yothando abathi oochwephesha bathi "yinto elindelekileyo yoxinzelelo."
Luyintoni uloyiko lothando (Philophobia)
Nokuba abantu bayayikhetha okanye hayi, uthando lufumana indlela yokuhamba ebomini babo bonke abantu, ngakumbi xa kungalindelekanga.
Abanye abantu abayiboni le nto njengethamsanqa.Endaweni yoko bayoyika ukwenzeka ukuya kuthi ga ngokungenangqondo boyike ukuthandana okanye boyike ubudlelwane.
Inzululwazi iyichaza njenge-phobia yokuwa eluthandweni, ngakumbi i-philophobia-uloyiko lothando.
Le phobia okanye uloyiko olugqithisileyo lokuthanda umntu luyinyani kwaye luyaboyikisa abanye bade bakhule boyike ngaphezulu koluvo nje lweemvakalelo okanye nantoni na ekude yokuthandana.
Kukho amathuba okuba nokuba nexhala elihlaselayo xa incoko iqhubeka malunga nobomi bothando bomntu.
Zama kwakhona: Ngaba Ndiyoyika Imibuzo Yothando
Iimpawu ezi 10 ohlangabezana noloyiko lothando
Unokuba ngumntu onganyamezeliyo ukubonakalisa iimpawu zemihla ngemihla, kodwa abanye bahlupheka imihla ngemihla, okwenza kube nzima ukuphuhlisa imbonakalo yobomi bemihla ngemihla.
Iimpawu ekufuneka uzibekele ingqalelo ukuba uthanda i-phobic zibandakanya (ezi zixhaphakile kwi-phobias ezininzi):
- Unentloko elula
- Ukungazinzi
- Ukubila
- Unesiyezi
- Isicaphucaphu
- Ukungcangcazela / Ukungcangcazela
- Iipalpitations / Ukubaleka kwentliziyo
- Mfutshane ngokuphefumla
- Ukuxakeka sisisu
- Uloyiko / Isiqendu sexhala
Le miqondiso ayichazwanga kwimibhalo yezonyango ziingcali zonyango ngoku.
Isibonakaliso kukuba uluntu oluchanekileyo kufuneka luphuhlise idatha ngakumbi kwabo boyika ukuthanda ukuqonda ngcono umbono wokuba banokuthembela kukhetho lonyango olufumanekayo kubagulayo.
Yintoni ebangela uloyiko lothando?
Uluntu lwezonyango, kubandakanya iingcali zengqondo kunye noogqirha bengqondo, luzama ukuqonda ngcono izinto ezibangela uloyiko lothando.
Iingcebiso zibonisa izinto ezininzi zokuba kutheni abanye befumanisa ukuba uthando lunokoyikisa, njengamava wobuntwana, isiganeko esibuhlungu, okanye ufuzo.
Nabani na onokoyika ukungathandwa emva okanye, ngaphezulu, ukwaliwa kuya kuthintela ukungena kubudlelwane, ke akukho thuba lokufumana iintloni okanye ukubeka emngciphekweni ikratshi labo xa oko kusenzeka.
Abo sele benamava okwaliwa, njengoqhawulo mtshato okanye uqhawulo mtshato olubi, bahlala banyamezele uloyiko lothando.
Iindlela ezili-10 zokoyisa uloyiko lothando
I-Philophobia ichaza ukuba yintoni uloyiko lothando. Uloyiko olothusayo luzisa ukuba wedwa, ukubekwa wedwa kunye nesizungu, okwenza ukuba abantu bazive bengafanelani noluntu kwaye belangazelela izinto ezintle zothando.
Ngelixa kukho uloyiko olunxulunyaniswa nokuzivumela ukuba uthande umntu, oko akuthethi ukuba awunamnqweno wokufumana uthando kunye nokukhulisa ukudibana ngokweemvakalelo.
Abantu abaninzi aboyikayo ukuthandwa bafuna iindlela zokutshintsha isikhundla sabo kwaye bafunde indlela yokuphelisa uloyiko lothando.
Ukoyisa nayiphi na i-phobia kunzima kakhulu, kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba akunakwenzeka. Makhe sijonge iindlela ezimbalwa onokuthi uzame ukusebenza ngazo.
1. Jonga ngembali yakho yothando ukwaliwa
Ukuthatha ixesha lokujonga nzulu kulwalamano ngalunye oludlulileyo kunokukunceda ukuba ubone apho unokufumana khona ukwaliwa, iintlungu, mhlawumbi umzuzu owawubuhlungu ngokuzithemba kwakho.
Naziphi na kwezi zinto zinokubangela ukuba uloyiko luqhubele phambili malunga nokuzibandakanya nomnye umntu.
Ukuba akuzange kubekho xesha lokuphilisa okanye ubungenayo inkqubo yenkxaso yokukunceda kuloo mava abuhlungu, oku kunokuba yingcambu ye-philophobia yakho. Iya kusebenza njengendawo yokuqala yokuphilisa.
2. Uziva njani ngesiqu sakho?
Ukuzithanda kubaluleke kakhulu ukuze ukwazi ukuthanda okanye ukuthanda omnye umntu. Ukuze uzithande, kufuneka ube nokuzithemba nokuzithemba. Oko kuthetha ukuba ungazibona iindawo zakho ezilungileyo, kodwa ungazibona iimpazamo kwaye uzamkele ezo.
Uyavuya kulusu lwakho. Akukho kuhlala kwinto engalunganga ngawe kunye nokuzama ukuzilungisa.
Ukuba ungumntu oqhubeka uzibeka phantsi, nangona kunjalo, loo manxeba abakho, kufuneka bahlalutye kwaye basebenze ukuze bajonge ngendlela esempilweni ngakumbi.
Oko kungathetha ukucebisa ukuba uqonde ngcono ukuba kutheni ungenako ukuzimisela ngokwakho.
3. Yeka ukumamela ilizwi elingaphakathi
Wonke umntu unelizwi elingaphakathi elihlala lithetha nathi malunga noko kulungileyo nokungalunganga, into ekufuneka siyenzile nesingamele siyenze, kunye nento ekufuneka sikhathazekile ngayo hayi kangako.
Elo lizwi lifaka uloyiko, kubandakanya izinto ezingenangqondo njengoloyiko lothando.
Masithi ukhe ukhe ube neenkumbulo ezimnandi zamaxesha olonwabo xa kufikwa kwezothando, umzekelo, ukuhlala ixesha elide nabazali abonwabileyo, abantakwenu kwimitshato enothando, abahlobo kubudlelwane obuhambelanayo. Kwimeko apho, elo lizwi likunika ulwazi oluphosakeleyo xa likucebisa ukuba ujonge uthando uloyiko.
Yenza imvakalelo yokuba sesichengeni kwaye ingakuvumeli ukuba ukhulule ukuze ukonwabele zonke izinto ezenziwa ngabo bonke abantu abakungqongileyo.
Eyona nto intle onokuyenza kukuzama ukuyazi into ebangela oko xa usondela ekudibaneni nothando kwaye uzame ukoyisa ezo zibongozo zokubaleka.
4. Qiniseka ukuba umntu otsalelekileyo ukufanele
Ewe asinakukhetha ukuba sithandana nabani. Ingaphaya kolawulo. Nangona kunjalo, abo ebomini bakho abakhethi buso kwaye banokwazi ukuxela xa umntu echanekileyo okanye engalunganga kwaye kutheni.
Uninzi lwabantu luhlala lusilela ukuva ukuba zithini izihlobo kunye nosapho xa kuziwa kwimicimbi yentliziyo.
Kodwa ukuba uchitha ixesha kunye nabanye abantu ababona iiflegi ezinkulu ezibomvu, nikela ingqalelo kwizilumkiso zokuphepha ukubongeza ukoyikeka kwakho kwixa elizayo.
5. Ukuba sesichengeni asiyonto imbi
Rhoqo, abantu bayoyika ukuziva iimvakalelo zabo, kwaye abanye bakholelwa ekubeni ukuba sesichengeni luphawu lobuthathaka. Kulungile ukuba sesichengeni, kwaye kulungile ukuba noloyiko lothando.
Ngokwenyani, inani elibaluleke ngakumbi labantu kunokuba linokubakho ngaphezulu kwe-philophobia kunokuba bekhathalela ukuyamkela.
Kuyothusa ukubandakanyeka nomntu kwaye uzibeke emgceni wokulahlwa. Akukho mntu ufuna ukwenzakala. Kwaye kuthatha umntu okhaliphileyo ukunxibelelana ngezo zinto.
Xa ufumana umntu oziva unamathele kuye, eyona njongo iphambili kukoyisa uloyiko lwakho, kunye nendlela efanelekileyo yokwenza oko kukuvula intliziyo yakho kwaye ubaxelele ngokuchanekileyo into ohlangabezana nayo.
Unokumangaliswa kukufumanisa ukuba omnye umntu woyika kancinci.
Ukwazi ngakumbi malunga nokuba sesichengeni kunokuba semandleni akho ubukele le vidiyo:
6. Zama ukuphumla ungalindeli kakhulu
Xa uphuma nomntu okokuqala (mhlawumbi amaxesha ambalwa emva koko), nceda ungafaki kakhulu kuyo.
Mayibe nje lixesha lokuzonwabisa endaweni yokuzikhathaza ngokuba "kukuthandana." Akukho mfuneko yokuba iileyibhile ziqhotyoshelwe. Oko kwenza izinto zibe nzima ngakumbi kwaye kudala uxinzelelo kubo bonke ababandakanyekayo.
Hlaziya kwaye wonwabele inkampani. Kwenzeka ntoni kwelo nqanaba kuya kuphela kube yendalo kwaye kube lula.
7. Bhala phantsi indlela oziva ngayo
Ukubhala indlela oziva ngayo kwaye ucinga ntoni kunokwenza iimeko zibonakale ngathi azoyiki kwaye kuncede ukukhulula uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo esijamelana nalo.
Rhoqo abantu bathambekele ekukhanyeni ngaphezulu kweengcinga ezifanayo ngokuqhubekayo, kodwa nje ukuba kusephepheni, kulula ukujongana nazo.
Unokufunda kwakhona malunga noko ukubhalileyo kwaye uzame ukulungelelanisa iimvakalelo okanye ubone ukungahambelani kwazo.
Ukuyibeka kwijenali kukuvumela ukuba uzibone ngokwahlukileyo, enye enokuvula amehlo akho.
8. Yiba nombono wokuhlala ngaphandle kwalo mntu uqala ukumthanda
Ukuba unomntu, uphuhlisa u "uthanda" kodwa woyika ukuba inokujikela ngaphezulu kunoko, thatha ixesha lokujonga ubomi bakho ukuba ebengekho lo mntu.
Umntu onandipha ukuchitha naye ixesha ayizukunyamalala, kodwa kuthekani ukuba benjenjalo? Kuza kwenzeka ntoni kuwe?
Indlela evakalayo yokoyisa uloyiko kukujonga into yokuba wawusenza inkqubela phambili phambi kokuba iqabane lakho lize, kwaye ukuba bebefanele "bakushiye", ungaqhubeka ulunge.
Isiseko se-Philophobia luloyiko lothando olungenangqondo, kwaye isiseko esibalulekileyo soko sinokubangelwa kukugatywa kwangaphambili okanye "ukulahlwa" okuthe ngqo kuchaphazela ubudlelwane bexesha elizayo.
Into ekufuneka uzama ukuyizisa ukuze uqonde ukoyisa uloyiko kukuba uzimele kwaye unakho ukusebenza. Iqabane liyinto ebalulekileyo ebomini bakho.
Ukuba kukho into enokwenzeka ukuba abasafuni ukuba yinxalenye yayo, uya kuqhubeka ukwenza ngokwakho.
9. Myeke ulawulo
Ukoyika uthando kukuzama ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho kunye nezabantu abakungqongileyo. Xa uzama ukulawula zonke iinkalo zobomi bakho, kunokuba nzima kwaye kubangele uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo kunokuba kufanelekile.
Okwangoku, uthando lwenzeka xa ungalindelanga, nokuba uyafuna okanye awufuni. Ayisiyonto ungayimisa kuba uyakuyifumana.
Unokwenzakalisa umntu, kubandakanya nawe, ngokuphelisa into esebenza ngendlela eya eluthandweni.
Oko kuqinisa nje izizathu zokubambelela kuloyiko. Vumela ulawulo kwaye ubone ukuba kwenzeka ntoni xa uvumela izinto ukuba zithathe ikhosi yazo.
10.Qonda ukuba uyingxaki
Xa ukudibaniselwano okonwabelayo kodwa uloyiko luqala ukuseta kuba uthando luqala ukukhula, awunakuziva kuphela xa usabela kuloyiko, kodwa iqabane lakho luziva utshintsho nakuwe.
Iqala ukubuchaphazela ubudlelwane obubi kuba awungomntu omnye neqabane lakho owawunalo ekuqaleni.
Uba negative, ucocekile ukuba lo mntu uza kushiya, kwaye aqale ukubatyhalela kude.
Olona hlobo kuphela lokwenza izinto ngokuchanekileyo kukubuyela kulaa nto wawuyiyo xa wawuqala ukuthandana notshintsho olupheleleyo lwesimo sokuthintela umanyano ngakumbi. Ukuzixakekisa kakhulu ngokwaliwa, unokuthi, ngokungazi, ukwenze oko.
Iingcinga zokugqibela
I-phobia luloyiko olungenangqondo okanye olubaxiweyo. Kwabo banengxaki yokoyika, kubonakala kuyinto entle. Uluvo lwe-philophobia okanye uloyiko lothando lunokubonisa ukuba lusizi ngokukodwa kwabo baneempawu.
Abantu babonisa ukunqongophala kokungahambelani noluntu kwaye baphoswe ziimvakalelo ezintle, zothando endaweni yokuba bengenabomi. Okumangalisayo kukuba, bayabatyhalela kude abantu abathi, ngamehlo abo, kuthi ngelinye ixesha babenzakalise ngokubala.
Babangela ukwahlukana ngokutyhala kude nobomi bexesha elide, ubudlelwane obunobulunga, beshiya amaqabane athandanayo edidekile ngamava.
Kukho izinto ezichaziweyo apha onokuzama ukophula uloyiko. Kuthatha umzamo omangalisayo kunye nomnqweno wokwenene, kodwa uthando yeyona nto iluncedo.