Umxholo
- 1. Yamkela ukuba ubudlelwane abusebenzi nje kuba nithandana
- 2. Yonke imihla, zama ukuba sesichengeni, ukuba nobulali kunye nobubele
- 3. Bonisanani ngokuphandle ukuba nifuna ukuthandwa ngokufikelela ngokuphandle
- 4. Yomelelanani
- 5. Fikelela kumaxesha oxhalaba naxhala
- 6. Zigcine ekubambeni
- 7. Yenze isiqhelo kubudlelwane bakho ukubonisa indlela wena neqabane lakho eninxibelelana ngayo
- 8. Yamkelani zonke izinto enizithandayo nizixabisekileyo omnye nomnye
- 9. Nciphisa iingxoxo
Inokuba siyiqhekezile ikhowudi yothando, okanye ubuncinci bethu kungenzeka ukuba siyenzile, kodwa uthando luyinxalenye kuphela yolwalamano kwaye amava othando anokudlula.
Ukugcina uthando kunye nokufumana bonke ubuso bayo, kufuneka sifumane ifomula yokudala olona lwalamano luhle. Ngale ndlela sinokugcina uthando kwicala lethu ixesha elide.
Nazi iingcebiso ezili-9 zokukunceda wenze olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo!
1. Yamkela ukuba ubudlelwane abusebenzi nje kuba nithandana
Ngamanye amaxesha, sinokucinga ngokungakhathali ukuba ngenxa yokuba sithanda kwaye sizinikele omnye komnye, kuko konke okudingayo ukuze wakhe olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo. Kodwa ngelixa ezo mpawu zibaluleke kakhulu, ayisiyo mfihlo yokufumana olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
Usenokwazi ukuthandana kwaye uhlale uzibophelele kodwa ungayikhathaleli eyakho imicimbi, okanye uthathe ubudlelwane bakho bube lula. Usenokuthanda kwaye uzibophelele komnye nomnye kodwa ungathathi ixesha elifanelekileyo kunye, okanye ukhumbule ukugcina ukusondelelana. Usengathandana wohlukane!
Olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo lunokwenzeka kuphela xa omabini amaqabane azinikele ngokupheleleyo ekuxabaneni, kunye nolwalamano lwabo kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi.
Uthando ayisiyonto yomlingo leyo eza kwaye ihambe ngaphandle kolawulo lwakho, unokufunda ngokulula ukuthanda kunye nokudibana nomntu. Oko kuthetha ukuba unokukhetha ukuhlala uthandana nothile.
Akukho sizathu sakuvumela uthando ukuba lome kubudlelwane, kufuneka uqiniseke ukuba uhlala uzibophelela ekusebenzeni kulwalamano lwakho. Yindlela onokwenza ngayo olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
2. Yonke imihla, zama ukuba sesichengeni, ukuba nobulali kunye nobubele
Kulungile ukuthoba ukhuseleko ekhaya, kwaye kubudlelwane bakho, yindlela oza kuthi uqhagamshele kwaye wakhe ukuthembana, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha ubomi bemihla ngemihla buthabatha indawo kwaye busenze ukuba sibeke phambili ukuze sikwazi ukuhamba kwihlabathi.
Ukwenza inzame zokunciphisa laa nto uyibekayo mihla le phambi kweqabane lakho ukuze ubonise ukuthamba, kwaye ububele kwiqabane lakho yindlela eqinisekileyo yomlilo yokwenza olona lwalamano luhle.
3. Bonisanani ngokuphandle ukuba nifuna ukuthandwa ngokufikelela ngokuphandle
Oku kufanele kube yenye into yemihla ngemihla; ukucela iqabane lakho ukuba likuthande okanye ukuhoya ayisiyondlela yokusebenzisa umzimba wakho kuphela kodwa ukwazisa iqabane lakho, ukuba ufuna kangakanani. Kwaye kugcina ulwalamano olusenyongweni luphilile.
Le yimivuzo emikhulu yesenzo esinye semihla ngemihla awucingi? Kungenxa yoko le nto esi sicwangciso senza ukuba kuluhlu lwethu lweyona mibono mikhulu yokwenza olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo!
4. Yomelelanani
Ngamanye amaxesha kulula ukuyichitha into ebalulekileyo kwiqabane lakho kuba ayibalulekanga kuwe. Mhlawumbi iqabane lakho linokuphendula ngokweemvakalelo kwinto enokubonakala ingafuneki kuwe, kodwa iyinyani kwiqabane lakho.
Mhlawumbi wena okanye iqabane lakho lifuna ixesha elincinci lilodwa kaninzi kodwa anidibani.
Ukuzama ukuqonda ukuba kutheni iqabane lakho lisenokufuna izinto ongazinxibelelanisiyo kwaye uzihloniphe (kwaye ngokuchaseneyo) kunokuthintela uninzi lweengxoxo kunye negalelo lolona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
5. Fikelela kumaxesha oxhalaba naxhala
Ngexesha elizayo xa uziva ungaqinisekanga, ukhathazekile okanye uxhalabile, zama ukukhankanya oku kwiqabane lakho kwaye uthathe isandla sabo, okanye uqaphele iimpawu zabo zeemvakalelo kwaye ufikelele kwisandla sabo.
Oku kuyakukhuthaza impendulo enika inkxaso phakathi kwenu njengabantu abatshatileyo, eya kuthi incede ukuba uzive ubanjiwe ngokwasemoyeni kwaye isenzo sokubamba ngesandla saziwa njengokuzolisa.
6. Zigcine ekubambeni
Ngamanye amaxesha kunokuba nzima ukuvuleka, endaweni yoko, uninzi lwabantu lunokukhetha ukuzikhusela, ukugxeka, ukuhlala kude, kude nokuzivalela.
Ngala maxesha anokubangela iingxaki kubudlelwane kwaye angenza umgama.
Ukuba nobabini niyazibophelela ekuzihloleni kwaye nisebenze ngokuba kutheni usenokuziva unjalo neqabane lakho- ukuze utshintshe isenzo sakho usenze impendulo evulekileyo, ulwalamano lwenu luya kuphakama kuhambo olukhawulezayo lolona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
7. Yenze isiqhelo kubudlelwane bakho ukubonisa indlela wena neqabane lakho eninxibelelana ngayo
Ukuthetha ngendlela iveki yakho ehambe ngayo veki nganye ukuze uphonononge kwaye ulungise indlela oziphethe ngayo, kunye neepateni kunye nokwazisa amaxesha amnandi, kuya kugcina ubudlelwane bakho busemgangathweni!
Imixholo onokuxoxa ngayo zezi;
Xa uziva ngathi ufikelela kwiqabane lakho kodwa ungaziva ngathi bamamele. Uphendule njani xa iqabane lakho likhathazekile. Yintoni nahleka kunye. Okanye nokuba bekuya kufuneka kwenzeke ntoni ukwenza ubudlelwane bakho buhle kule veki?
Qiniseka ukuba uyilungelelanisa le mibuzo ukuze ilungele ubudlelwane bakho kodwa ungayithinteli imixholo eyimfuneko ekwenzeni olona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
8. Yamkelani zonke izinto enizithandayo nizixabisekileyo omnye nomnye
Bhiyozela impumelelo encinci kulwalamano lwakho, baya kukwenza ukuba uzive uthandwa kwaye uxabisekile.
Yazisa into eyenziwe liqabane lakho ukuze uzive uthandwa, wonwabile, wonwabile kwaye uxhaswe kwaye uqiniseke ukuba uyabaxelela, ubuncinci kube kanye ngeveki ukuze bazive bethandwa kwaye baqhubeke njalo.
9. Nciphisa iingxoxo
Ngaphantsi kwengxabano kuhlala kusisicelo esivela kwiqabane lakho sokunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo kunye nenkxaso engakumbi. Kodwa xa izinto zishushu, kunzima ukukubona oku, ngakumbi xa siziva sizikhusela.
Ukuba awukhathalelanga ukuba ngawaphi amagama owasebenzisayo okanye uthetha njani neqabane lakho ngala maxesha kunokuba ngumahluko phakathi kolwalamano olunamatye kunye nolona lwalamano lubalaseleyo.
Zama ukujonga imeko ngokungathi ubuphandle ujonge ngaphakathi kwaye uzibuze ukuba yintoni ingcambu yengxaki apha kwaye ingasonjululwa njani. Emva koko yamkela ingxaki kwaye usebenze kuloo nto, yenza isivumelwano sokuba nobabini niyakwenza oku, kwaye yonke into iya kuba mnandi!.