Umxholo
- Kutheni le nto abanye bethu benabahlobo abambalwa emva komtshato?
- Wonke umhlobo wahlukile
- Kutheni le nto silindele ukuba iqabane / iqabane lethu libe yiyo yonke into yethu?
"Umhlobo ngamnye umele umhlaba kuthi, ilizwe elinokuthi lingazalwanga de bafike, kwaye kungale ntlanganiso kuphela apho kuzalwa khona ilizwe elitsha."
-Anaïs Nin, Idayari ka-Anaïs Nin, Umqu. 1: 1931-1934
Kukho izifundo ezimbalwa malunga nexabiso lobuhlobo. Uninzi lwezifundo lubonisa ukuba yintoni esebenzayo kwingqondo xa sikunye nomhlobo ngokuchasene nomntu wasemzini. Oku kuyinyaniso nokuba umntu wasemzini uyafana nathi.
"Kuzo zonke iimvavanyo, ukusondelelana kodwa ukungafani kuye kwabonakala kuqhuba iimpendulo kwimimandla yangaphambi kwendawo yangaphambili kunye nemimandla enxulumene nayo kuyo yonke ingqondo," utshilo uKrienen. Iziphumo zibonisa ukuba ukusondelelana nabantu kubaluleke ngaphezu kweenkolelo ekwabelwana ngazo xa kuvavanywa abanye. Funda iMontague, PhD, yeBaylor College of Medicine, ingcali yokwenza izigqibo kunye ne-composational neuroscience, uthe, "Ababhali bathetha into ebalulekileyo yolwazi kwezentlalo-ukubaluleka kwabantu abasondeleyo kuthi," utshilo uMontague.
Kutheni le nto abanye bethu benabahlobo abambalwa emva komtshato?
Ke ngelixa isayensi ikukubaluleka kwabantu abasondeleyo kuthi, kutheni abanye bethu benabahlobo abambalwa? Ndithetha nabahlobo ubuso ngobuso kunabahlobo abangama-500 onabo kuFacebook okanye abalandeli abali-1000 kuTwitter.
Into endiyibonayo kwindlela endisebenza ngayo kukucotha kobuhlobo emva komtshato. Izifundo zibonisa ukuba abasetyhini bagcina kwaye bagcina izihlobo ixesha elide kunamadoda. Kodwa kubaluleke kangakanani ukuba sibubone ubuhlobo ndiyazibuza oku kuba ngelixa ndisebenza nabantu abathandanayo, ndihlala ndimangalisiwe kulindelo lomlingani omnye komnye. Into endiyithethayo yile, "ukuba uyandithanda, uya kukhathalela zonke iimfuno zam kwaye ube yiyo yonke into yam." Ngoku andikaze ndiwave la magama ngqo, kodwa ndivile ukuba uluvo luni.
Umtshato okanye ubambiswano lolunye lolwalamano olusenyongweni umntu anokuba nalo, kodwa ayisiyiyo kuphela ulwalamano umntu anokuba nalo.
Wonke umhlobo wahlukile
Xa sijonga kubuhlobo bethu, sinokubona zonke iinkalo ezahlukileyo zabahlobo bethu. Umhlobo ngamnye usikhonza ngokwahlukileyo. Umhlobo omnye ulungile ukubuza imibuzo yefashoni okanye yoyilo, ngelixa omnye umhlobo inguye oya kwiimyuziyam. Omnye umhlobo unokuba mkhulu ngexesha likaxakeka, ngelixa omnye efuna isaziso esihleliweyo. Umhlobo ngamnye ubeka into ngaphakathi kuthi. Into enokuthi ingakhange ibonakalise de kufike loo mhlobo. Uhlobo olunjengokucaphula ekuqaleni kwesi siqwenga.
Oku kundizisa kulo mbuzo:
Kutheni le nto silindele ukuba iqabane / iqabane lethu libe yiyo yonke into yethu?
Ndibonile amaqabane endothuswe yingcinga yokuba iqabane labo alifuni kwabelana ngayo yonke into. Ngaba le yingcinga yaseMelika yokuba xa sisebenzisana kunye neemfuno ziyagutyungelwa, okanye zonke iingxaki zinokulungiswa? Ngamanye amaxesha ukulungisa izinto kuthetha ukuvuma ukungavumelani. Ngamanye amaxesha kuya kufuneka uye kuloo khonsathi kunye nomhlobo endaweni yeqabane kuba iqabane lakho alifuni ukuya. Kuthekani xa ugula? Izandla ezininzi zinokufuneka ukuze zikuthambekele, hayi esinye nje. Kusindwe ngobunzima ukuba ungabi nguwo wedwa. Ewe, iqabane lakho lingoyena mhlobo wakho uphambili, kodwa ayisiyiyo yakho kuphela.
Gcina umtshato wakho / ubuqabane kubuhlobo obunzulu kunye nothando lwesini. Phinda uvuse ubuhlobo bakho uvule umhlaba omtsha kwaye uyitshise ingqondo yakho. Obu buhlobo bunokunceda kuphela ukuphucula ubudlelwane bakho kunye.