Umxholo
- Imincili kunye nemincili Vs. ubungakanani kunye nexabiso lendandatho yokuzibandakanya
- Ngaba ubungakanani bubalulekile?
- Ubungakanani bendandatho abuyi kuqinisekisa umtshato ophilileyo
- Izinto ezincinci, ezongezelekayo zobubele eluthandweni
- Ukuba uthando lunzulu kangako, umtshato unokuba nzulu kangako
Ngeli xesha kanye ufunda eli nqaku, uninzi lwabasetyhini luyazibandakanya ngethemba lokuba yindoda yamaphupha abo. Kwaye xa ecebisa kwaye evula le bhokisi ibambe enye yezona zangqa zixabisekileyo anokuze azifumane. Ngaba uya konwaba okanye aphoxeke?
Kodwa kule minyaka idlulileyo, amakhonkco okuzibandakanya aye kwabaninzi, uphawu lwesimo esikhulu. Uphawu lwesimo sothando? Okanye ukuthandwa? Apha ngezantsi uDavid uthetha ngengxaki yokubandakanya umsesane, kunye nokuba ezinye izibini ziyasokola njani kwilinge labo lokufumana uthando ngenkqubo yokuzibandakanya.
Imincili kunye nemincili Vs. ubungakanani kunye nexabiso lendandatho yokuzibandakanya
"Xa esithi," ungatshata nam ", kwizigidi zabafazi kwihlabathi liphela kulo nyaka, iya kuba ngamazwi anethemba lokuliva ubomi bakhe bonke. Nokuba ngumtshato wakhe wesibini, wesithathu okanye wesine, uvuyo kunye nemincili isenokubonakala ngathi kokokuqala. Kodwa bekukho umkhwa kule minyaka ndiyibonileyo, ngokubhekisele kwingxaki malunga nobukhulu kunye nexabiso lendandatho yokuzibandakanya, ayisiyiyo nje ubunzulu bothando umntu anokuba nalo kwintombi yakhe.
Kwakubonakala ngathi iyaqhuma xa ilizwe lokwenyani leenkqubo zikamabonwakude zaqala ukuba ninzi ebomini bethu.Ndiqinisekile ukuba yaqala ngaphambi koko, kodwa kwindlela yam yokunceda izibini ezitshatileyo, kunye nabantu abaphakathi abaphakathi abaza kutshata, kubonakala ngathi kukho ukuphakama kwixabiso elibeka abanye abantu kubungakanani bendandatho, oko kudale uxinzelelo kunye nokungavumelani kubudlelwane.
Ngaba ubungakanani bubalulekile?
Umfazi waqala umsebenzi wokukhula komntu, kwaye kwiseshoni yakhe yokuqala, wayexhalabile kakhulu malunga nokungabikho kobungakanani bedayimane kwindandatho yakhe yokuzibandakanya. Wayengathandabuzi ukuba uyasithanda isithandwa sakhe, kodwa wayexhalabile ukuba iringi awayeyinxibe esandleni sasekhohlo ayizukuhlangabezana nemigangatho yentombazana yakhe.
“Ndizibonile iindandatho ezininzi ezintle kule minyaka ili-10 idlulileyo, kwaye bendinethemba lokwenyani xa ndathembisana ukuba indoda efuna ukunditshata iza kundibonisa ubunzulu bothando lwayo, ngokundithengela enkulu kakhulu, ecacileyo- usike idayimani endinokuzingca ngokunxiba.
Andiqinisekanga ukuba ndingathi ndiyazingca ngokunxiba umsesane endiwufumene kwiveki ephelileyo. Incinci kakhulu kunokuba bendicinga, kwaye ukuba ujonga ngokusondeleyo ngeglasi yokuqaqambisa idayimani, ukucaca akukho nje. Ndiyathemba ukuba umfana endithandana naye uza kuvumelana nam, sibuyele kwijewler awayesifumene kwaye siyifakele enye into ebaluleke kakhulu. mandulo. Kwaye umfana awayethandana naye wayengonwabanga kwaphela ngempendulo yakhe kuye malunga nokufumana idayimane enkulu, ebhetele, ebiza kakhulu.
Ubungakanani bendandatho abuyi kuqinisekisa umtshato ophilileyo
Ndiyayiqonda ingcinezelo yanamhlanje yokuba abantu ababhinqileyo beme kwilizwe leeringi zokuzibandakanya, kwaye ndiyayiqonda nendlela ekububudenge ngayo ukuthelekisa uthando lomntu kunye nobungakanani besipaji sakhe. Isithandwa sakhe sichithe iinyanga ezintandathu sigcina imali ngale ring, kwaye wayezidla kakhulu ngokuba ekwazile ukukwenza ngaphandle kokucela uncedo nakubani na, ukumboleka imali engaphezulu, okanye ukumxelela ukuba angayikhetha njani iringi.
Wayejikeleze waya kwiivenkile ezininzi zeentsimbi kwaye wayekholelwa ukuba ufumene into entle kakhulu kunye neringi entle. Ngoku wayebuza ukuba ngaba intombi yakhe yayiyintombazana kuye. Ngaba ungamsola? Okanye, uya kwicala lentombazana? Ngaba unqwenela umsesane omkhulu ukuba ubonise iintombi zakhe?
Ndixelele ibali elifanayo kwabasetyhini abaninzi kule minyaka idlulileyo, ukuba ukhathazekile ngobungakanani beringi, kuya kufuneka ujonge ukuba zeziphi izinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka kubudlelwane bakho. Kwaye akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokutshata nendoda enokufumana umsesane omkhulu wedayimane ukuze uzive ukhuseleke ngakumbi kunye nezintombi zakho.
Kodwa ubungakanani bendandatho abuyi kuqinisekisa umtshato ophilileyo okanye umtshato owanelisayo. Kwiflipside, makhe ndikubalisele ibali lomfazi omncinci omangalisayo kunye nothando lwakhe ngomlingane wakhe. Ngokuchasene neminqweno yabazali bakhe kunye neminqweno yeentombi zakhe, wafumana uthando nendoda eyayingafumani mali ininzi. Hayi kuba wayesisidenge, okanye esonqena, kodwa akazange abeke phambili ekwenzeni imali.
Izinto ezincinci, ezongezelekayo zobubele eluthandweni
Endaweni yokumsa kwiidinala ezimnandi, wayeza kumothusa kaninzi ngenyanga ngesidlo sasemini esilungiswe kakuhle, esimnandi ayakubonisa e-ofisini yakhe engaziswanga, kwaye phambi kwakhe ene-silverware yokwenene kunye ne-napkins yelaphu. Wayehambile kwaye wakha iintyatyambo zasendle wazifaka esityeni sakhe, wazisa nasemsebenzini wakhe.
Kuba uxanduva lokuhlawula umtshato lwalusegxalabeni lakhe nasegxalabeni lakhe, abazali babo babengenayo imali yokuhlawula umtshato wabo okanye ulwamkelo. Wayemxelele ngaphambili ukuba ubungakanani bomsesane wokuzibandakanya uza kuba mncinci kwaye kufuneka babeke imali emtshatweni, kwiholide yabo, nakwezinye izinto abazigcinileyo ekufumaneni indawo entsha abanokuhlala kuyo kunye.
Uye wancuma, waphakamisa isandla sasekhohlo, wandibonisa ibhendi elula yesilivere eyayiba ngumsesane wakhe wokuzibandakanya. “Andinokonwaba ngakumbi kuDavid, uluthando lobomi bam.”
Njengokuba ufunda le, kwaye ukuba uziva ukuba umntu oza kutshata naye akunike ibhendi elula yesilivere njengendandatho yokuzibandakanya uya kuphoxeka, ube neentloni, kwaye ube neentloni ukubonisa iintombi zakho. Mhlawumbi awuqondi ukuba luthando olunjani. Mhlawumbi, kuya kufuneka ulinde ude udibane nomntu osisityebi ngokwaneleyo ukuze ufumane umsesane omkhulu wedayimane, kwaye unethemba lokuba indawo yothando ikho nayo. Kwaye andinanto nxamnye nemali.
Ukuba uthando lunzulu kangako, umtshato unokuba nzulu kangako
Njengombandela, ubutyebi bam bezemali bubangelwa kukuba ndisebenza nzima, ndenza umsebenzi endiwuthandayo, kwaye bendisenza njalo iminyaka. Kwaye ndiyakholelwa, ukuba uthandana nomntu ongenakho ukufikelela kumsesane omkhulu kwaye ufuna ukukunika oko, apho kungekho xinzelelo kwiakhawunti yakhe yebhanki yokwenza njalo, kwaye niyathandana kakhulu. Owu Nkosi yam, yiya uyonwabele.
Kodwa ukuba umthanda ngokwenene umntu, ngokusuka emazantsi entliziyo yakho, kwaye abanakho ukubonelela nantoni na engaphezulu kwebhanti yesilivere elula esandleni sakho sasekhohlo njengendandatho yokuzibandakanya, njengesithembiso sokutshata, yibambe. Ngoku. Yibonise kubahlobo bakho. Ndiziva ndinebhongo. Kwaye uqonde ukuba ikamva lakho nalo mntu likhuseleke ngokungathi ubunxibe idayimani yekarati elishumi ngasekhohlo.
Kwaye ukuba uthando lunzulu kangako, umtshato unokuba nzulu ngokunjalo.