Umxholo
- Thetha neqabane lakho
- Thetha kubo bonke abantu
- Akukho kroti ikhethekileyo okanye intonga
- Chitha ixesha elininzi kunye
Wonke umntu uyalazi ibali, abantu bayatshata, banabantwana, izinto ziyawa, emva koko bahlukane. Umbuzo ngulo, kwenzeka ntoni ebantwaneni?
Ukuba abantwana bancinci kakhulu ukuba bangaya kwilizwe ngokwabo, amaxesha ngamaxesha kunokuba kungenjalo, nangona kukho iimeko apho bahlala khona nezinye izalamane, bahlala nomzali omnye, kwaye omnye ufumana amalungelo okundwendwela.
Ilungu ngalinye losapho olungasebenzi kakuhle lizama ukuzimela lodwa kwaye liqhubeke nobomi. Kunzima, kodwa bazama konke okusemandleni abo.
Ngenye imini, umzali apho ahlala khona umntwana ugqiba ekubeni atshate kwakhona. Omnye okanye bobabini abasandul 'ukutshata banokuba nabantwana kumtshato wabo wangaphambili. Lithuba lesibini lokonwaba, okanye kunjalo?
Nazi ezinye iingcebiso zomtshato wesibini owonwabileyo nabantwana.
Thetha neqabane lakho
Linyathelo lokuqala elibonakalayo elo. Umzali wokwenene uya kuyazi bhetele indlela aya kusabela ngayo umntwana xa enomzali wesibini. Ihlala isisiseko semeko. Abanye abantwana baya kuba nentumekelelo ngakumbi, benomdla, nokuba bamkele umzali omtsha ebomini babo.
Abanye baya kuba bengenamdla kuyo, kwaye kukho abathile abaya kuyithiya.
Siza kuxoxa kuphela ngemiba enxulumene nabantwana abangakwaziyo ukwamkela imeko entsha yosapho. Umtshato wesibini owonwabileyo awunakwenzeka ukuba kukho ukungaboni ngasonye phakathi kwabantwana kunye nomzali wabo omtsha. Yinto enokuzisombulula ngokuhamba kwexesha, kodwa ukuyityhala kancinci endleleni akuyi kwenzakalisa.
Thetha neqabane lakho, xoxa kwaye ucingele ukuba umntwana angathini xa sele enosapho olutsha kwaye abazali bangathini kubo ukuya phambili.
Thetha kubo bonke abantu
Emva kokuba abo batshatayo bexoxe bodwa, lixesha lokuba bayive emntwaneni kwaye bathethe ngayo. Ukuba umntwana akanayo imicimbi yokuthembana, baya kuba bathembekile, banokwenzakalisa ngamazwi abo.
Yiba ngumntu omkhulu kwaye uthathe. Yinto elungileyo, xa amagama ebukhali, kokukhona ethembekile. Inyaniso ibaluleke ngaphezu kobuchule kweli nqanaba.
Ke qala ngokuseta imood elungileyo. Gcina yonke i-elektroniki (kubandakanya neyakho), cima iTV, kunye nezinye iziphazamiso. Akukho kutya, amanzi nje okanye ijusi. Ukuba unako, yenze kwenye indawo ungathathi hlangothi, njengetafile yokutya. Ukuba kwenye indawo umntwana uziva ekhuselekile, njengakwigumbi labo, baya kuziva bengaqondi ukuba banokukukhahlela kude kuphele ingxoxo. Kuza kuqala into embi.
Okuchasene nayo kuyinyani ukuba baziva bevalelekile kwaye bembombo.
Sukubuza imibuzo ekhokelayo enje, Ngaba uyazi ukuba kutheni ulapha, okanye into engenangqondo, uyazi ukuba ndisandula ukutshata uyayiqonda ukuba kuthetha ntoni loo nto? Itshabhisa ubukrelekrele bayo kwaye ichitha ixesha lomntu wonke.
Yiya ngqo kwinqanaba.
Umzali wokwenene uyayivula ingxoxo kwaye azise omabini amaqela imeko. Sobabini ngoku sitshatile, ngoku ungumzali wesibini kunye nomntwana, kuya kufuneka nihlale kunye, ukuba niyabambana omnye nomnye iya kuba yinto yonke.
Into ecaleni kwale migca. Kodwa, abantwana banelungelo lokusebenzisa amagama abukhali, kodwa abantu abadala kuya kufuneka bayenze ngesohlwayo esininzi kunokuba bendisandula ukukuchaza.
Khomba onke amaqela kufuneka aqonde -
- Umzali wesibini akazukuzama ukubuyisela oyena mntu wakho
- Umzali wesibini uya kumgcina umntwana ngokungathi ngowabo
- Umzali wesibini uya kuyenza kuba leyo yinto efunwa ngumzali wokuzalwa
- Umntwana uya kunika umzali wesibini ithuba
- Bonke baya kuvana kuba bonke bayamthanda umzali wokwenene
Izinto ongamele uzitsho-
- Thelekisa omnye umzali nomzali wesibini
- Umzali wesibini akasayi kuze ashiye (ngubani owaziyo?)
- Buyela umva omnye umzali
- Umntwana akanalo ukhetho (abanalo, kodwa bangatsho)
Qhuba incoko ngokubhekisele ekuqwalaseleni umzali we-biological. Kuya kufuneka iphele kuba omabini amacala ayamthanda umzali wokwenyama. Baza kwenza konke okusemandleni abo ukuze bavane.
Isiseko kumtshato wakho wesibini owonwabileyo kunye nabantwana kufuneka ibe luthando, hayi imithetho. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba iqale kwangoko, kodwa ukuba awufuni kukrola umqala, sisiqalo esihle.
Akukho kroti ikhethekileyo okanye intonga
Musa ukuhlawula ngaphezulu ukuzama ukukholisa umntwana. Yiba nguwe, kodwa shiyela yonke imisebenzi yoqeqesho kumzali we-biological.
Kude kufike ixesha lokuba wamkelwe njengenxalenye yendlu, kuphela ngumzali wokoqobo onokukhupha isohlwayo ngezenzo ezigwenxa. Musa ukuphikisana nomzali wokuzalwa, nokuba benza ntoni. Ezinye izinto zinokubonakala ngathi zikhohlakele okanye zinobubele kuwe, kodwa awukalifumani ilungelo lokufumana uluvo okwangoku. Kuza kuza, yiba nomonde.
Ukohlwaya umntwana ongakwamkeliyo (njengomzali) wakho, kuya kusebenza ngokuchasene nawe. Ukulungiselela ukulunga komntwana, kuyinyani, kodwa hayi usapho xa lulonke. Iya kudala ubutshaba phakathi kwakho nomntwana kunye nokuxabana okunokwenzeka neqabane lakho elitsha.
Chitha ixesha elininzi kunye
Iya kuba sisiqingatha sonyaka sonyaka sokugqibela senyanga yonyaka part 2 nabantwana. Kumnandi ukuba isibini sinokufumana indlela yokuchitha ixesha kunye sisodwa. Kodwa ixesha elisandul 'ukutshata liya kuba kunye nosapho lonke. Nantoni na oyenzayo, musa ukubathuma abantwana ekuqaleni komtshato ukuze ube kunye neqabane lakho elitsha.
Ngaphandle kokuba abantwana bakho babathiye abazali babo bokwenyani, baya kuthiya umzali wesibini ukuba bathunyelwe okwexeshana. Nabantwana baba nomona.
Ke qala amasiko amatsha osapho, wenze iimeko apho wonke umntu anokubopha (ukutya kuhlala kusebenza). Wonke umntu uza kufuneka ancame kwaye achithe ixesha elininzi kunye. Iya kubiza, kodwa yile nto iyenzelwa imali.
Yiya kwiindawo angathanda umntwana, kuya kufana nokuthandana nomntu ophethe yena, kunye nomzali webhayoloji njengevili lesithathu.
Akukho mfihlo yokuba nomtshato wesibini owonwabisayo nabantwana. Ifomula iyafana nomtshato wokuqala.
Amalungu osapho kufuneka athandane kwaye ahlalisane kakuhle. Kwimeko yokutshata nosapho oludibeneyo, kukho nje inyathelo elongezelelekileyo lokukhuthaza imeko yosapho kuqala.