Umxholo
- 1. Isizathu sokuqhawula umtshato
- 2. Abantwana
- 3. Uhlobo lobudlelwane obukonwabele ngaphambi nasemva komtshato wakho
- 4. Ukwabelana ngobutyebi kunye nepropathi kwinkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato ngokusemthethweni
- 5. Inzondo
- 6. Ityala lenkundla okanye inkqubo yoqhawulo-mtshato
- 7. Ukugcinwa komntwana
- Ungabenza njani ubuhlobo phakathi kwamaqabane akho angaphambili
- 1. Thatha isigqibo sokuba ngabahlobo
- 2. Yenzani uxolo omnye nomnye
- 3. Xolela kwaye uzame ukulibala
- 4. Yiba nobuhlobo
- Uqhawulo-mtshato alusoze lube lula, kodwa ubuhlobo bunokwenzeka
Ngaba kufuneka uhlale ungumhlobo kunye ne-Ex okanye cha? Umbuzo wokuba ingaba ubuhlobo phakathi kwamaqabane angaphambili kunokwenzeka na ngulowo uninzi lwabantu luye lwaxambulisana ngalo.
Abanye abantu bakholelwa ekubeni kunokwenzeka ukuba ube ngumhlobo ne-ex yakho kwaye abanye bakholelwa ukuba akunjalo. Ngelixa ezinye zikholelwa ekubeni nokuba kunokwenzeka, a ubuhlobo abunampilo.
Nangona kunjalo, inyani kukuba ukubakho kobuhlobo emva koqhawulo mtshato kulingana nokuba nokwenzeka kokungabikho kobuhlobo okanye ubutshaba nje obucacileyo phakathi kwabatshatileyo. Konke kuxhomekeke kwiziganeko ezenzeke ngaphambi koqhawulo mtshato kwaye ngexesha lenkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato.
Ukanti, zikho izibini e-US ezigcine ubudlelwane obunobuhlobo kunye nabatshatileyo.
Kukho iminyhadala eyenzeke ngaphambili kwaye ngexesha lenkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato ethathelwa ingqalelo njengeyona nto inegalelo kulwalamano lobuhlobo phakathi kwabatshatileyo.
Ke, ngaba kulungile ukuba ngumhlobo we-Ex yakho? Makhe sijonge ezi zinto zilandelayo ngexesha.
Ukufunda okuhambelana: Kutheni le nto kunzima kakhulu ukuhlala Abahlobo kunye ne-Ex
Izinto ezichaphazela ukubakho kobuhlobo phakathi kwabatshatileyo
1. Isizathu sokuqhawula umtshato
Zininzi izizathu zokuba kutheni abantu abatshatileyo beqhawula umtshato kwaye uninzi lwezi zizathu zinxulumene nokungahambelani okanye ukungavisisani phakathi kwamaqabane.
Kwimeko apho kwabakho ubundlobongela basekhaya okanye ukungathembeki ngokwesondo okubandakanyekileyo njengonobangela woqhawulo-mtshato, amathuba obuhlobo emva komtshato aphantsi. Kwelinye icala, ukuba abatshati bahlala bexabana okanye besilwa ngexesha lomtshato wabo, ke amathuba obuhlobo emva komtshato nawo aphantsi kakhulu.
Kwimeko, apho omabini amaqabane akwazi ukuthatha isigqibo sokuba bobabini batshatile ngenxa yezizathu ezingalunganga ezifana nokuba intombi ikhulelwe kwaye bakulungele ukuhamba ngeendlela zabo ngoxolo, kukho amathuba aphezulu okuqhawula umtshato kufutshane ikamva.
Inkonzo ebalaseleyo yokubhala isincoko inokubhala isincoko esipheleleyo kwizizathu ezininzi ezinzima zokuba kutheni abantu abatshatileyo beqhawula umtshato.
Nangona kunjalo, isizathu sokuqhawula kwabo umtshato sinegalelo elikhulu ekubeni ingaba izibini zinokonwabela ubuhlobo emva koqhawulo-mtshato okanye hayi.
2. Abantwana
Ngaba izibini eziqhawule umtshato zinokuba ngabahlobo? Ewe kunokwenzeka ukuba ube nobuhlobo obunempilo nomntu wakudala, ngakumbi xa kukho umntwana obandakanyekayo kubambiswano.
Le yenye into emisela ukuba izibini zihlala zingabahlobo emva koqhawulo-mtshato, okanye hayi. Ukuba abantu abatshate nabo banabantwana, kunokwenzeka ukuba ubuhlobo emva koqhawulo-mtshato kuba bobabini amaqabane kufuneka aziphathe kakuhle xa umntwana okanye abantwana bekhona.
Wonke umntu uyazi ukuba uqhawulo mtshato lungabachaphazela njani abantwana kakubi nasengqondweni. Abazali abalungileyo baya kuzama ukunciphisa imiphumela emibi yoqhawulo mtshato ebantwaneni babo ngokuba ngabahlobo.
3. Uhlobo lobudlelwane obukonwabele ngaphambi nasemva komtshato wakho
Khawufane ucinge abahlobo abasenyongweni abatshatileyo, kodwa kamva bagqiba kwelokuba nangasiphi na isizathu, abahambelani ngokwaneleyo ukuba babe sisibini.
Kule meko, iimeko ezinokwenzeka kukuba abo babetshatile baya kuhlala bengabahlobo emva koqhawulo-mtshato. Kodwa abantu abatshatileyo ababenomtshato osebenze ngongquzulwano, kunqabile ukuba bahlale bengabahlobo emva komtshato.
4. Ukwabelana ngobutyebi kunye nepropathi kwinkqubo yoqhawulo mtshato ngokusemthethweni
Enye yezinto ebangela ukungavisisani phakathi kwabantu ababetshatile emva koqhawulo-mtshato kukwabelana ngezinto nomhlaba.
Amaxesha amaninzi, nokuba liqabane lifuna ukufumana kangangoko linokufumana emtshatweni ukuze liqale ubomi obutsha. Kukwakho iimeko apho iqabane elisisityebi lihlala lingafuni ukwahlukana nemali yalo.
Ngapha koko, zininzi iimeko ezinokubakho malunga nokwabelana ngobutyebi kunye neepropathi xa izibini ziqhawula umtshato. Amaxesha amaninzi, xa kukho inkundla enzima malunga nokwabelana ngobutyebi kunye neepropathi, ithuba lokuba nobuhlobo emva komtshato liphantsi kakhulu.
5. Inzondo
Ubuhlobo phakathi kwamaqabane angaphambili buxhomekeke kakhulu kwingqumbo ekhoyo phakathi kwamaqabane angaphambili ngexesha lomtshato noqhawulo-mtshato.
Ukuba zininzi iingxabano ezingazinzanga kumacala omabini kwaye akukho xolelwaniso okanye uxolo olwenziwe ukushenxisa le ntiyo igcweleyo emtshatweni okanye kuqhawulo mtshato, bunokubakho ubuhlobo obunokubakho phakathi kwabatshatileyo.
6. Ityala lenkundla okanye inkqubo yoqhawulo-mtshato
Ngamaxesha amaninzi, ukuba uqhawulo-mtshato lwenzeka netyala lenkundla, ithuba lokuba nobuhlobo liphantsi kakhulu.
Kungenxa yokuba, inkundla yamatyala yayinokwenzeka kuphela ngenxa yokuba izibini zenqabile ukulungisa into phakathi kwabo kwaye bagqiba kwelokuba bajongane enkundleni ukuzokuyilungisa. Kwaye ekubeni inkundla yamatyala inokuthanda umntu omnye kuphela, kuhlala kukho iqela elingonelisekiyo emva kwetyala lenkundla.
7. Ukugcinwa komntwana
Ukugcinwa komntwana kukwayenye into enokuthi ithathe isigqibo sokuba ingaba ubuhlobo bunokwenzeka na phakathi kwamaqabane angaphambili.
Amaqabane ekuye kwanyanzeleka ukuba aye enkundleni ukuzokulungisa umba wokugcinwa kwabantwana mancinci amathuba okuba babe ngabahlobo. Kungenxa yokuba naxa bebehleli phantsi bevumelana ngokugcinwa komntwana, phambi kokusa umcimbi enkundleni, abakwazanga ukufikelela kwisivumelwano ngoxolo.
Ungabenza njani ubuhlobo phakathi kwamaqabane akho angaphambili
Ubuhlobo phakathi kwamaqabane angaphambili kunokwenzeka.
Nangona kunjalo, zininzi izinto ebekufanele ukuba bazenzile abantu abatshatileyo ukuba babe ngabahlobo emva komtshato.
1. Thatha isigqibo sokuba ngabahlobo
Nokuba lininzi igazi elibi phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho langaphambili elivela kwimisitho yomtshato noqhawulo-mtshato, ukuba ufuna ukufezekisa ubuhlobo, kufuneka uxolelane.
Ingabonakala ingenakwenzeka ngenxa yomsindo, inzondo, kunye nosizi lokuphulukana nomtshato, kodwa ngokuzimisela kunye nengqondo evulekileyo, unokuba ngumhlobo olungileyo kwi ex yakho.
Kodwa inyathelo lokuqala kukuthatha isigqibo sokwenza uxolo omnye komnye kwaye uthathe isigqibo sokuba ngabahlobo nokuba beningengabo abahlobo ngaphambili. Ewe kunjalo, inkqubo yoqhawulo-mtshato ngokusemthethweni ikubethile phakathi kwakho, ikwenza ukuba uphantse ube ziintshaba.
Kodwa ukuba nobabini nigqibe kwelokuba nokuba kungasiphi na isizathu, nifuna ukuhlala ningabahlobo, kunokwenzeka.
2. Yenzani uxolo omnye nomnye
Ukuze wenze uxolo neqabane lakho langaphambili, kufuneka uqale wenze uxolo nesiqu sakho.
Zivavanye, uziva uneentloni zantoni? Yintoni ozibekek 'ityala ngayo kwaye usola ntoni ngeqabane lakho? Emva kokuba uchonge ezi zinto, unokufikelela kwi-ex yakho kwaye uyisombulule imicimbi phakathi kwakho.
3. Xolela kwaye uzame ukulibala
Akukho nto iyakuphuma ngokukhalaza okanye ukuthetha ngokungavisisani kwakho kunye nemicimbi yakho neqabane lakho ukuba nobabini anizimisele ukumamelana kunye kwaye niyalalanisa.
Awudingi umbhali wengxelo yeelebhu ukukuxelela ukuba ubunephutha phi kwaye wawungekho phi. Njengabantu abadala, kufuneka nobabini niyazi into eniyenzileyo okanye eningakhange niyenze gwenxa, emva koko nithathe amanyathelo okuxolela nokulibala.
4. Yiba nobuhlobo
Ubuhlobo abenzeki ngobusuku obunye, njengokubhalwa kwesiko akunakwenziwa ngeyure.
Ukuba ufuna ukuqala ubuhlobo obunempilo kunye ne-ex yakho, kufuneka uqale ngokuba ngumhlobo. Yenza unxibelelwano lwakho lube lula kwaye lube nobuhlobo. Kuba sele uchonge ukungavisisani kwakho kwaye uzisombulule iingxaki zakho, ukuba nobuhlobo omnye nomnye akufuneki kube ngumzamo.
Ngapha koko, ezinye izibini eziqhawule umtshato ziba ngabahlobo abasenyongweni ngenxa yenkululeko yokuba ngaphandle komtshato obubeke uxinzelelo kubudlelwane babo ngaphambili.
Uqhawulo-mtshato alusoze lube lula, kodwa ubuhlobo bunokwenzeka
Uqhawulo mtshato aluzange lube lula, nokuba uqhawulo-mtshato lwaluluxolo okanye hayi. Kodwa ubuhlobo phakathi kwabatshatileyo bangaphambili.
Indlela eya kubuhlobo emva koqhawulo-mtshato ingaqala kuphela emva kokuba nixolelane kwaye nachonga iyantlukwano yenu. Ukuba unako ukuyeka ngempumelelo inzondo kunye nenzondo, wena kunye ne-ex yakho niyakonwabela ubomi obutsha njengabahlobo kwaye nenze ubudlelwane obutsha nobungcono nabanye abantu.