Umxholo
- 1. Ukubuza imibuzo
- 2. Thumela umyalezo
- 3. Okulandelayo yingxoxo enkulu
- 4. Thatha ulawulo lwamava osondeleyo
Masijongane nayo, emva kweenyanga ezintandathu, iminyaka emithandathu okanye iminyaka engama-25 uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo bemka kubudlelwane obusondeleyo nobonwabisayo. Ukungoneliseki. Ukukhathazeka.
Nazi izitshixo ezine eziphambili zokukunceda ukongeza eso siqholo kunye nemincili kubomi bakho ngokwesondo ekunokwenzeka ukuba ilahlekile kangangeenyanga ezininzi ubuncinci, kunye neminyaka emininzi kokubi.
1. Ukubuza imibuzo
Wagqibela nini ukubuza iqabane lakho ukuba banqwenela ntoni malunga namava akho obusondeleyo? Ugqibele nini ukubathumelela isicatshulwa okanye i-imeyile ngokukodwa, esebenzayo ngakumbi kunokuthetha nomntu, ubabuze ukuba bangathanda ukwenza ntoni ngokwahlukileyo ngokubhekisele kubudlelwane obusondeleyo? Ngokumalunga nokwabelana ngesondo?
Kuyandothusa xa ndisebenza nabantu abatshatileyo abanesithukuthezi kakhulu ngobomi babo bokwabelana ngesondo, bangaphi kubo abayeke ukubuza imibuzo ebaluleke kakhulu endikhe ndayidwelisa apha ngasentla.
Kutheni kunjalo? Kulungile inombolo yokuqala, kukho ingqumbo. Inzondo iba sendleleni yokusondelelana ngalo lonke ixesha. Uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo, xa ndibacela ukuba babelane ngeyona nto bayithandayo, cima ngoko nangoko. Ayihlazo. Ayilotyala.Abafuni kuthetha phambi kweqabane labo malunga nokusondelelana, kunye nezinto abazinqwenelayo kuba bacaphukile ngenxa yezinto abangazange bazikhathalele.
Ke ukuba ungomnye wabo bantu, ukuba uwela kudidi lokuba awukhathali ngesondo ngenxa yokuba unenzondo kakhulu, kuya kufuneka usebenze nomcebisi, umphathiswa okanye umqeqeshi wobomi ukuze ulahle inzondo kuqala. Inyathelo lokuqala. Ukuba awuyenzi le nto? Akukho nto, kwaye ndithetha ukuba akukho nto iya kuze itshintshe.
2. Thumela umyalezo
Ngoku uthatha ukuba sele uwenzile umsebenzi kwaye ubuncinci ukuba kukho inzondo, masibuyele kule nto bendiyithetha ngasentla. Thumela i-imeyile, okanye uthumele umyalezo kwiqabane lakho namhlanje, hayi ngomso, hayi ngeCawa, kodwa namhlanje kwaye ubabuze ukuba yintoni na engekhoyo kubo kubomi babo bobulili kunye nawe. Masibone ukuba bazakubeka emngciphekweni wokuvuleleka kwaye babe sesichengeni kwaye bakunike isitshixo kwinto abanqwenela ukuyenza ukuba ubomi bakho obusondeleyo bube mnandi ngakumbi.
Ngokwakho, ndifuna ukuba uthumele i-imeyile okanye umyalezo kwiqabane lakho ubaxelele into oyithandayo ngobomi bakho obusondeleyo. Ngaba yindlela abanga ngayo? Ngaba yindlela ekubamba ngayo isandla sakho? Okanye bakwola njani xa usiya emsebenzini?
Ukuqala unxibelelwano lwakho ngolu hlobo kubaluleke kakhulu. Olu hlobo lwe-imeyile okanye isicatshulwa luvula umnyango wenxalenye elandelayo yale nxaki.
Ke emva kokuba ubaxelele into oyithandayo ngamava akho osondeleyo, kancinci kancinci qalisa ukucacisa ukuba yintoni ongathanda ukuyenza ukongeza kwinto esele bayenzile kakuhle.
Kwaye ucacise. Musa ukubashiya beqikelela. Sukuthetha izinto ezinje "ndingathanda ukusondelelana nawe", lonto ayithethi nto.
Uya kuba semngciphekweni wokufumana into enkulu ebomini. Ke ungathi kubo "Ndingathanda ukuba nolwalamano olusenyongweni nawe, nto leyo ethetha ukuba sibuyele umva xa sasiqala ukudibana saze sathandana kathathu ngeveki." Ngoku uthumele into abanokuzisongela ngayo iintloko zabo xa uhlala phantsi ukuze uthethe ngokwandisa iziqholo kubomi bakho obusondeleyo.
3. Okulandelayo yingxoxo enkulu
Emva kokuba nitshintshisene ngeimeyile kunye nokubhaliweyo, eyindlela ekhuselekileyo yokuqala ukongeza iziqholo kubomi bakho obusondeleyo, ngoku kufuneka sihlale phantsi kwaye sijongane ukuze sixoxe ngolwalathiso ubudlelwane ekufuneka luye kulo.
Oku kufuneka kusoloko kusenziwa ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala. Hayi ngexesha lokwabelana ngesondo, hayi nje emva kwesondo kuba sonke sisengozini kakhulu ngelo xesha.
Baxelele ukuba ungathanda ukuhamba ukhe uthethe malunga nokuphucula ubomi bakho obusondeleyo. Okanye hlala ekhitshini ngekomityi yekofu kwaye uxoxe nje ngokungathandekiyo apho ungathanda ukuya khona. Phambi kokuba ube nale ncoko, bacele ukuba bavuleke iingqondo, nceda ungavali umlomo, ukuba xa bengavumelani nento oyithethayo banokuthi ngokulula abavakali nje, endaweni yokuhlekisa ngawe okanye ukuvala ngokupheleleyo naziphi na iingcebiso onokuba nazo.
Ndifumene izibini ezininzi le nxalenye yencoko inokuphuculwa kakhulu ngokusebenza nengcali. Kutshanje, bendinethuba lokunceda isibini esiseCalifornia ngaphezulu kweSkype ebinemicimbi esondeleyo. Bobabini babekruqukile. Kodwa bobabini bazaliswa yinzondo. Nje ukuba siyicime ingqumbo ngaphandle kwendlela, kwaye sobabini babenayo kwi-Skype kwiseshoni yabo, babevulekile kakhulu ekuphenduleni imibuzo endibanike yona. Oku kuye kwathatha ezinye zeentloni kude nokuba bobabini babe yinkokheli kwincoko.
4. Thatha ulawulo lwamava osondeleyo
Wakhe walixelela iqabane lakho ukuba uzakuthatha ulawulo lwamava obusenyongweni ofuna ukwabelana nawo ngale ngokuhlwa? Ngaba wakhe wabathumelela umyalezo othi “xa ufika ekhaya ngokuhlwanje, ndifuna uvale amehlo uhambe ungene kwigumbi lokulala? Ndiza kubamba isandla sakho ukuze ungangeni nakweyiphi na indonga, kodwa ndonwabe kakhulu yile nto ndikuhlelele yona.
Kwigumbi lokulala esele limisiwe unamakhandlela, mhlawumbi isilika okanye amashiti e-satin, kunye nomculo othambileyo odlala ngasemva.
Ngoku kukho izibini eziza kujonga la manyathelo mane angentla kwaye zithi ziqala ngokubhekisele ekongezeni iziqholo kubudlelwane bazo. Kodwa akukho sigwebo apha. Ukuba oku kungasentla kubumnene, yiya endle ngendlela yakho.
Kodwa ukuba ufuna ukuqala ndaweni ithile, ukuba uyadika kwaye uyazi ukuba ufuna uncedo lokuphinda wenze ubomi obusondeleyo, la manyathelo mane angentla aya kukuqhubela phambili.
Ndicinga ukuba isitshixo kukuqonda ukuba ufuna uncedo kwaye ulucele. Kukho amawaka abacebisi kunye nabanyangi abanjengam kwihlabathi liphela abonwabe ngakumbi ukukunceda ukuba uphinde ubenemincili obusondele kuyo xa wawuqala ukuthandana kunye namava omtshato. Sukulinda. Namhlanje lusuku lokuba ubambe iqabane lakho ngesandla nangentliziyo ... kwaye ubakhokelele kumendo wobudlelwane obusondeleyo kunye nonxibelelwano. ”