Ukujongana Nomtshato Ongonwabanga?

Umxholo

• Ngaba ukhona omnye umntu onokukonwabisa?
• Yintsomi yenkcubeko yokuba omnye umntu angasenza siziva singonwabanga

Ukutshata kwethu, ndandicinga ukuba isisombululo kuye. ”

"Ndicinga ngenene ukuba angandonwabisa kwaye ndicinge ukuba ndingamtshintsha."

"Sigxile kakhulu emtshatweni, kutheni le nto sitshatayo sasilandela emva."

"Ndatshata kuba ndandineminyaka engama-33 kwaye yile nto yayisenziwa ngumntu wonke ngelo xesha."

"Andizange ndiyithandabuze inkolelo yoluntu yokuba ukuhlala nomntu kubhetele kunokuba wedwa ... ukuba ukutshata kubhetele kunokuqhawula umtshato. Andisayiboni injalo kwakhona. ”

Ezi ziingxelo eziyinyani ezivela kubaxhasi.

Ngaba ukhona omnye umntu onokukonwabisa?

Ukusukela ebutsheni, uye wagcwala ngombono wokuba omnye umntu uyakwazi ukukonwabisa. Uyibonile kwiimovie (hayi iiDisney kuphela!), Yifunde kwiimagazini nasezincwadini, kwaye uyiva ngengoma emva kwengoma. Umyalezo wokuba omnye umntu wakwenza wonwabe uye wagagulwa kwingqondo yakho engazi nto kwaye wadityaniswa kwiinkqubo zakho zokukholelwa.

Ingxaki koku kungaqondani kukuba okuchasene phantse kuhlala kuyirhola intloko yayo embi. Ukuba uyakholelwa ukuba omnye umntu uyonwabisa, kuya kufuneka ukholelwe ngokuchaseneyo, ukuba omnye umntu angakwenza ungonwabi.

Ngoku, anditsho ukuba abantu endisebenza nabo eneneni abonwabanga ixesha elininzi. Bazi.

Nangona kunjalo, masijonge phantsi kwe-hood yale ngcinga yokuba omnye umntu kulapho sifumana khona uvakalelo lwentlalo-ntle kunye nothando.

Ndithetha nomthengi, masimbize John. UJohn wandivumela ukuba wayetshatile kwiminyaka engama-30 ngenxa yokuba wayeziva enyanzelekile. Ke, wadibana nenenekazi kwaye walithanda, ke walitshata. Emva kweminyaka emi-6, inqanaba lonxibelelwano lalingekho. Bahlukana unyaka, bahlala kwiidolophu ezahlukeneyo, kwaye babonana kanye ngenyanga. Emva konyaka, uJohn Christy owayengumfazi wakhe ngoku wathi akasafuni ukuba naye. Ngokufihlakeleyo uYohane wayenemincili! Wayekhululekile kwaye onwabile.

UJohn emva koko waqweba isibindi sokubuza omnye umfazi. UJohn wavuya xa wathi ewe. Baqala ukuthandana kwaye emva kweenyanga ezi-6, intombazana entsha, uJen, yathetha la mazwi kwaJohn. “Andisafuni kuphinda ndibe nawe”.

UJohn wayekhathazekile! Wangena kuxinzelelo olunzulu nolumnyama olwaphelela kwilinge lokuzibulala. UJohn wayesazi ukuba kufuneka afumane uncedo.

Waqala ukuya kwiisemina wafunda iincwadi. Ekugqibeleni wafumanisa iparadigm eyahlukileyo enxulumene naye kunye nobudlelwane bakhe. UJohn wabona ukuba ayingabo abafazi ababangele umohluko ekuphenduleni kwakhe. Yindlela awayecinga ngayo ngaba bafazi, ibali kunye nentsingiselo awayenxibelelana nayo nabasetyhini, eyathi yonyusa impendulo yakhe. Emva koko, lo mfazi wathetha into efanayo kuye. Ixesha lokuqala wayevuya. Okwesibini wayekhathazekile wazama ukuzibulala.

Bukela kwakhona: Ungalufumana njani ulonwabo emtshatweni wakho

Yintsomi yenkcubeko yokuba omnye umntu angasenza siziva singonwabanga

Uninzi lwabantu lukholelwa ekubeni abanye abantu banokubenza bazive nto ithile, njengokungonwabi, ichanekile ngokwenzululwazi kwaye sisiseko sokugxeka ngokungeyomfuneko, ukuhlazisa, kwaye ekugqibeleni ukubandezeleka ngokweemvakalelo.

Cinga emva kobudlelwane bakho. Khange ubenamaxesha omsindo okanye isithukuthezi okanye usizi kwasekuqaleni kobudlelwane bakho? Ngenxa yoko, ngaba ukhe waya kwindawo apho waziva unoxolo, wonwabile, kwaye udibene, nokuba bekungekho mntu wumbi?

Ndiyakumema ukuba uqalise ukuqaphela ukuguquguquka kwakho okungaphephekiyo kwimood. Ngaba awonwabanga ngokwenene mzuzwana ngamnye wosuku? Unokucinga njalo, kodwa ngaba kunjalo ngokwenene kwenzekantoni?

Ngoku, nangona imvakalelo yolonwabo iveliswa ngaphakathi (ngokungazi ngesiqhelo), oko akuthethi ukuba kufanele uhlale kunye nomnye umntu.

Anditsho ukuba konke kusentloko yakho. Izinto eziyinyani zenzeka kubudlelwane: ukukopela, ubundlobongela, ukuphathwa gadalala kwengqondo, intlekele, njl. Ngokwenene ezi zinto ziyenzeka.

Inqaku endifuna ukulenza apha kukuba xa singena (okanye ngaphandle kothando) nomntu, oko kwenzeka ngaphakathi kwethu, kwiingcinga zethu, emzimbeni, nakwimichiza.

Oku kufanelekile kuba kuthatha umntu omnye ukuba abone olu hlobo lwangaphakathi lobomi.

Kuthatha kuphela iqabane elinye ukuba linganiki ukubaluleka kokuhlala kwakhe ecinga ngeqabane lakhe nangomtshato.

Kuthatha kuphela umntu omnye ukuba angaziphathi okanye aziphathe ngendlela yakhe yesiqhelo, ukuze kwenzeke utshintsho.

Ukucinga okuza kuthi kwahlukile kunendlela esicinga ngayo. Kukho ithemba lolonwabo kwakhona. Unazo izibonelelo zangaphakathi zokuzifumana ngokungaguquguqukiyo kwakhona, kunye okanye ngaphandle kweqabane lakho.