Umxholo
- 1. Ukugxila kubudlelwane
- 2. Ukufika kwiphepha elinye okanye ubuncinci ukwazi umahluko wakho
- 3. Ukuphuhlisa isicwangciso somdlalo
- Ukucaca kwimiyalezo yomtshato
- 5. Ukutyala imali emtshatweni wakho
Njengomcebisi kubudlelwane kunye nomqeqeshi, ndiyayifumana inomdla ukuba abantu bazimisele ukuchitha imali eninzi, ixesha kunye namandla emtshatweni. Kodwa xa kuziwa emtshatweni, bathambekele ekuphulukaneni nokugxila kwaye bangatyali emtshatweni.
Sinomtshato wokubhiyozela umtshato ukuba ungabi nje nepati enkulu, akunjalo? Ukuba uyatshata, yenza iingcebiso ngaphambi komtshato ziyinxalenye yebhajethi yakho yomtshato kunye nomtshato. Ukutyala imali kubudlelwane bakho kunokuhlawula igalelo kulwaneliseko lomtshato.
Kukho abantu abacinga, "Kufuneka kubekho iingxaki" ngakumbi ukuba abantu abatshatileyo baya counselling ngaphambi kokuba batshate! Ukucebisa kunamabala amaninzi nanamhlanje. Kodwa ukucebisa izibini ngenene yindawo yokufunda kunye nokuphucula ubudlelwane.
Ubudlelwane busekwe kwisayensi kwaye uninzi lwethu aluzange lufundiswe (kubandakanya nam ndide ndiqeqeshwe njengomcebisi wabatshatileyo) indlela "yokwenza" ubudlelwane. Ukuba oko kwenzekile, abantu abaninzi ngebabeye kufumana iingcebiso ngaphambi kokuba izinto zibe mbi.
Iyacetyiswa Ikhosi yangaphambi komtshato
Ubusazi ukuba izibini zilinda iminyaka emi-6 ukuze zingene kwingcebiso emva kokuba iqabane licela okokuqala? Ngaba unokucinga uhambahamba ngengalo eyaphukileyo iminyaka emi-6, ouch!
Ukucebisa ngaphambi komtshato yinto bambalwa kakhulu abantu abazibandakanya nayo, bengazi ukuba inokuba luncedo kangaka.
Makhe sijonge izibonelelo ezi-5 onokuzifumana kwiingcebiso ngaphambi komtshato:
1. Ukugxila kubudlelwane
Ngaphambi kokuba nitshate, eyona nto kugxilwe kuyo lixesha lakho kucwangciso lomtshato hayi komnye nomnye.
Zininzi kakhulu izinto ezibandakanyekileyo kunye neenkcukacha ezininzi ekufuneka uziqwalasele, ucwangcise kwaye uthathe isigqibo. Oku kubeka ubudlelwane kwisitya esingasemva. Xa ususa ingqwalaselo ubuyela kubudlelwane obunxibelelana kwakhona neqabane lakho malunga nokubalulekileyo kuni nobabini.
2. Ukufika kwiphepha elinye okanye ubuncinci ukwazi umahluko wakho
Uninzi lwezibini zicinga ukuba zikwiphepha elinye xa kuziwa kwizinto ezibalulekileyo kubudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo xa i-Push isiza kutyhala akusoloko kunjalo.
Ubudlelwane bunokuba nzima kwaye xa utshata nosapho lomnye umntu, ngamanye amaxesha izinto zinokuba nzima ngakumbi. Iintsapho aziboni ngasonye kuyo yonke into. Abazali bakho banokucela ukuba uchithe iKrisimesi nganye nabo kwaye nabazali beqabane lakho banokufuna okufanayo.
Ukuthatha isigqibo malunga nokwahlula-hlula ixesha ngeeholide sesinye sezihloko ezininzi (ezemali, ukhathalelo lwabantwana, indlela yokukhulisa abantwana, indlela yokukhathalela abazali abalupheleyo, imisebenzi yasekhaya, iindima, njl.njl.) Ungaqala ukuphonononga nokusombulula kwiingcebiso phambi komtshato.
3. Ukuphuhlisa isicwangciso somdlalo
Lonke iqela lezemidlalo eliyimpumelelo linomqeqeshi kunye nesicwangciso somdlalo kwaye kufanele njalo yonke imitshato ephumeleleyo. Umcebisi wakho womtshato ngumqeqeshi wakho, ekukhokela kunye neqabane lakho emtshatweni ophumelelayo.
Izibini ezininzi zithi, “Akwaba ndandazile ngaphambi kokuba sitshate.” Ukucebisa ngaphambi komtshato kulungiselela izibini kwisiphango kunye nesicwangciso somdlalo ngaphambi kokuba uhlasele ngokuxoxa ngezinto izibini ezinokujamelana nazo njengokungaqeshwa okanye ingxaki engalindelekanga ngesiquphe.
Xa unesicwangciso esihle somdlalo endaweni yendlela yokuphatha ezo ziganeko, uyazi ukuba ngawaphi amanyathelo oza kuwathatha kunye nendlela yokuphendula, kunokuba usabele.
Ukucaca kwimiyalezo yomtshato
Sonke sikhule sifumana uhlobo oluthile lwemiyalezo malunga nomtshato kunye nobudlelwane, nokuba abazali bethu babetshatile, beqhawule umtshato, okanye bengatshatanga. Sithathe yonke kunye nathi ngokulungileyo, okubi okanye ukungakhathali.
Ukucebisa ngaphambi komtshato kukuvumela ukuba uphonononge into oyizisayo emtshatweni wakho kwaye ingena njani kulowo uziswa liqabane lakho emtshatweni. Xa usenza ulwazi malunga nemiyalezo efihliweyo okanye ecacileyo uza kuthatha isigqibo malunga nendlela ofuna ukuba ngayo umtshato wakho.
5. Ukutyala imali emtshatweni wakho
Njengokuba utyala imali kwikamva lakho nakwilixa elizayo, qiniseka ukuba utyala imali kumtshato wakho. Enye yezona zinto zixabisekileyo onazo. Xa sixinezelekile kubudlelwane bethu ubomi bunoxinzelelo. Xa sonwabile kubudlelwane bethu ubomi bubangcono.
Ukusebenza nomcebisi wabatshati abaqeqeshiweyo ngaphambi kokuba utshatile kukuvumela ukuba uphonononge ukuba yeyiphi "ubudlelwane obubekiweyo" onokuyenza kwibhanki yakho yeemvakalelo, nokuba kukuhamba ubusuku kanye ngenyanga, nisenzela izinto ezintle omnye komnye, nizalisekise amaphupha kunye okanye nje ingqalelo yakho eyahlukileyo.