Umxholo
- Misela indima yakho kukungasebenzi kakuhle komtshato wakho
- Qaphela isidingo sokuvavanya ngaphambi kokuba uhlale kolu hlobo lobuyatha
- 1. Musa ukuseta imida, landela iziphumo
- 2. Kwisithuba seentsuku ezingama-60 nithandana, uya kubona imiqondiso yempambano
- 3. Intlonipho elahlekileyo ngenxa yemida ngaphandle kweziphumo
- 4. Fumana uncedo lobungcali ukuze ubeke izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo
- Kwaye kufuneka wenze ntoni?
Ukuba uthandana okanye utshatile nomenzi ophambeneyo, mhlawumbi ucinga ukuba yonke idrama kunye nesiphithiphithi kungenxa yabo. Kwaye inxalenye yayo kunjalo, kodwa hayi uninzi.
Kule minyaka ingama-28 idlulileyo, umbhali othengisa kakhulu, umcebisi kunye nomqeqeshi wobomi uDavid Essel‘s bebenceda abantu ukuba baqonde iindima esizidlalayo xa sinobudlelwane bothando obungasebenziyo.
Apha ngezantsi, uDavid uyayiqhekeza intsomi yokuba liqabane lakho eliyingxaki. Ipilisi enzima ukuyiginya kuninzi, kodwa inye kuphela eyimfuneko ukuba ufuna ukuphila ubomi boxolo novuyo.
Misela indima yakho kukungasebenzi kakuhle komtshato wakho
Wangena e-ofisini, wanikina intloko, ezibuza ukuba ingaba bethuna angathini ukuba angatshata umfazi ongenankathalo nongenantlonelo ngolu hlobo. Ndihleli ndamamela malunga nemizuzu engama-45 ukuba aqhubeke ephindaphinda, bonke ubugeza abuzisayo ebomini bakhe yonke imihla.
Ekupheleni kwelizwi lakhe elinye, ndambuza umbuzo olula, "ithini inxaxheba yakho ekungasebenzi kakuhle emtshatweni wakho?"
Ukhawuleze waphendula. “Akukho nto. Ndenza yonke into endizakuyenza, nangaphezulu, ndichasane nenkosikazi yam esweleyo. “Kuthathe iiveki ezilishumi zokucebisana naye, ukumqinisekisa ukuba impendulo yakhe ibingachanekanga nge-100%.
Ekugqibeleni, wabona oko ndizama ukumfundisa lonke elixesha, kwaye ekugqibeleni waba ngowakhe. Kwaye ukuba ngumnini, wayeza kukhululeka.
Uyabona, xa wawuthandana "nomenzi ophambeneyo" umntu ochitha yonke imali yakho, othi bazokwenzela izinto bangazenzi, ohlala ebonisa emva kwexesha kuwo wonke umsitho omele uye kuwo, sifuna ukubasola ngemicimbi kubudlelwane bethu bothando.
Kodwa owona mbandela? Ngaba thina. Nguwe. Ndim, ukuba sikulungele ukuhlala nolo hlobo lobuyatha.
Kwaye, emva kweminyaka engama-30 njengomcebisi kunye nomqeqeshi wobomi, ndiyibonile yonke, ndiyivile yonke into, kwaye nangoku, ekujongeni ubuhlanya bolwalamano oluninzi lothando namhlanje, ndiyaqonda ukuba siyingxaki.
Ngoba? Kuba sahlala. Ngenxa yokuba sanyamezela. Kungenxa yokuba senza nje zonke iintlobo zokukrokrela, izoyikiso kunye nokunye okuninzi.
Asinazo iibhola zokuba sihambe okanye siye kukufumana iingcebiso ixesha elide ukufumana indlela yokujongana nobudlelwane obungasebenzi kakuhle.
Qaphela isidingo sokuvavanya ngaphambi kokuba uhlale kolu hlobo lobuyatha
Ke ukuba uyathandana okanye utshatile nomntu okuqhubela ukuba uphambane yonke imihla, kuba baxoka, bahleba, bachitha imali kakhulu, batya kakhulu, basela kakhulu, okanye baphula amagama abo rhoqo, masijonge Kufuneka siyihlolisise ngaphambi kokuba sihlale kolu hlanya:
1. Musa ukuseta imida, landela iziphumo
Ukuba ubeka imida enje ngokuba "ukuba wophula ilizwi lakho ixesha elinye sigqibile. Ukuba nichitha imali engakumbi siya kuba sesivumelene ukuba siza kuyenza. ” Kodwa awulandeli kuyo, uyingxaki.
Nguwe onika amandla. Nguwe omnciphisayo. Ulungile ekumiseleni imida kodwa awunawo amandla okulandela ngesiphumo kwaye ushiye nje bakwenze kwakhona.
Ndibona oku ngalo lonke ixesha kwihlabathi lokulutha kubudlelwane, apho umntu omnye alikhoboka lotywala, kwaye iqabane lihlala lisoyikisa ukuba liza kuhamba kodwa alizange lenze njalo.
Uyingxaki.
2. Kwisithuba seentsuku ezingama-60 nithandana, uya kubona imiqondiso yempambano
Nantsi into eyothusayo kuninzi lwabathengi bam, xa ndibaxelela ukuba le ndlela yokuziphatha, ukungaziphathi kakuhle komthandi wabo bekuqhubeka ukusukela kwiintsuku zokuqala ezingama-60 zolwalamano lwabo, bandijonga bahlunguzela iintloko ngokungakholelwa.
Emva koko ndibathatha kuthotho lokubhala, kwaye ukothuka kuba yinkolelo. Into endiyithethileyo iyinyani.
Kwisithuba seentsuku ezingama-60 uthandana nomnye umntu, uza kubona imiqondiso, nokuba uyafuna ukuyibona okanye akunjalo, ukuba kukho iitoni zesiphithiphithi kunye nedrama ngaphambili.
Kodwa kuba iimvakalelo zinamandla ngakumbi kunengqiqo eluthandweni, siyilahla le logic, sibambelele kwithemba leemvakalelo lokuba ziya kutshintsha, kwaye sifile emanzini.
3. Intlonipho elahlekileyo ngenxa yemida ngaphandle kweziphumo
Ngenxa yokuba ubeka imida ngaphandle kwemiphumo, iqabane lakho alihloniphi kwaphela. Funda kwakhona.
Kungenxa yokuba uyabacaphukisa kwaye ubaxelele ukuba uza kushiya kangaphi ukuba baphinde benza u-X, kodwa akwenzi njalo, abanantlonipho kwaphela ngawe. Kwaye akufuneki bakuhlonele nantoni na.
Ngoba? Kuba ngoku nguwe owaphula amazwi akho.
4. Fumana uncedo lobungcali ukuze ubeke izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo
Impendulo inye kukungena kwiingcebiso ngoku kwaye ufumane ingcali ukuze ubone ukuba yeyiphi indima yakho kukungasebenzi kakuhle.
Andinakukhathalela kancinci xa umntu endixelela "besikunye iminyaka engama-35, sitshatile iminyaka engama-35 kwaye inqanaba loqhawulo-mtshato liphezulu kakhulu". Kodwa banobudlelwane obonwabisayo iminyaka engama-34. Andichukumiseki kwaphela.
Sukuhamba uqhayisa ukuba unexesha elingakanani uhleli nomntu, xa ubudlelwane bakho bufunxa. Yiba yinyani. Fumana uncedo. Kukuwe ukuba utshintshe, hayi bona.
Kwaye kufuneka wenze ntoni?
Kuya kufuneka uqale ngokulandela awakho amazwi. Kuya kufuneka usete imida enzulu kunye neziphumo kwaye okunene utsale isiphumo.
Okanye, kufuneka uphelise ubuhlanya, uthathe uxanduva lokungazi ukuba ujongana njani nokungasebenzi ngothando, yamkele ukuba uyi-50% okanye nangaphezulu yengxaki, kwaye uqhubeke. Baqhawule umtshato. Phelisa ubudlelwane. Kodwa yeka ukukhalaza, uyeke ukuba lixhoba.
Kukho umhlaba wonke wothando ngaphandle, kwaye ukuba uyaphoswa, yimpazamo yakho.
Umsebenzi ka-David Essel'ukhuthazwe kakhulu ngabantu abafana nongasekhoyo uWayne Dyer, kwaye usaziwayo uJenny McCarthy uthi "uDavid Essel yinkokeli entsha yentshukumo yokucinga eyakhayo."
Incwadi yakhe ye-10, enye inombolo ethengiswa kakhulu ibizwa ngokuba yi “focus! Bulala iinjongo zakho. Isikhokelo esiqinisekisiweyo sempumelelo enkulu, isimo sengqondo esinamandla nothando olunzulu.