Umxholo
- Ifanelekile nini ingcebiso ngomtshato?
- Xa omabini amaqabane engakwazi ukusombulula iiyantlukwano zabo
- Xa elinye lamaqabane linokuthandana
- Xa izibini zifuna ukuhlala kunye kuphela ngenxa yabantwana bazo
- Ngaba ingcebiso ngobuhlobo iyanceda
Emveni kweminyaka. Izizathu zokufuna ukucebisa ngomtshato ziye zanda ukusuka kwimali yomtshato, ukungathembeki kunye nokunxibelelana ngomtshato kwezinye izinto ezininzi ezingaqhelekanga kodwa ezibalulekileyo njengokulawula ubudlelwane ngaphandle kwemicimbi yosapho kunye neminyaka yobudala bedijithali, ukubala ezimbalwa.
Izibalo zikwabonakalisile ukuba phantse isihlanu kwisihlanu semitshato yokuqala siphele kuqhawulo mtshato. Amanqanaba oqhawulo-mtshato, ewe, axhomekeke kwinqanaba lemfundo kunye neenkolelo zonqulo zamaqabane abandakanyekayo.
Kukho ezinye izinto ezahlukeneyo ezinegalelo kwizibini eziqhawula umtshato njengokungahambelani, ukuzingca nokungakhathali.
Xa umtshato uqhekeka, baya kuzisa ubunzima obuninzi kungekuphela kwabo babandakanyekayo kodwa nakubantwana babo, ukuba bakhona.
Ukuqhekeka kosapho sesinye sezona ziganeko zibuhlungu nezinoxinzelelo kubomi babantu. Uqhawulo-mtshato lusoloko luzisa ukungaqiniseki kunye namathandabuzo malunga nendlela obuya kuma ngayo ubomi kwikamva.
Ke, ufuna nini unyango lwezibini?
Xa ufuna ukuyeka ukuqhuba ishishini njengesiqhelo emtshatweni wakho kwaye ungathanda ukuqala ngokutsha neqabane lakho.
Uloyiko lokujongana nokungaqiniseki nokuba rhabaxa kobomi besibini esishiyene nayo sesinye sezizathu zokufuna iingcebiso ngomtshato.
Ngokukodwa, abantwana baya kudlula kwiziphumo ezibi zoqhawulo-mtshato ngenxa yeemvakalelo zokulahlwa, ukungavumi, kunye nokuziva unetyala. Ukubonisa eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu ebantwaneni sesinye sezizathu ezibalulekileyo zokufuna ukucetyiswa ngomtshato.
Kodwa kuqala, yintoni ukululekwa ngomtshato? Ukuchonga uxinzelelo olunxulumene nomtshato kwaye woyise ukungavisisani, ngamanye amaxesha abantu abatshatileyo baye babhenele ekucebiseni ngomtshato ukunceda ukulungisa ubudlelwane.
Ifanelekile nini ingcebiso ngomtshato?
Kwezinye izibini, uqhawulo-mtshato lujongeka njengokuphela kokhetho kubudlelwane babo kodwa kwabanye, kungangabi lula kwaye banokuthanda ukusindisa nantoni na eshiyekileyo kolo lwalamano.
Esinye sezizathu eziqhelekileyo zokufuna ukucetyiswa ngomtshato kukujongana nengxaki ethile kubudlelwane. Esinye sezizathu eziphambili zokuba abantu bafuna ukufikelela kumcebisi womtshato kukufuna uncedo kubuhlobo obusondeleyo kunye nobusondeleyo.
Ke, ufuna nini ukucebisa ngomtshato?
Xa abantu abatshatileyo bejongana nemiba kubomi babo bomtshato, banokucinga malunga nokuba kuya kufaneleka nini ukuya kufumana iingcebiso ngomtshato. Ke ukuba unokuchonga ngayo nayiphi na kwezi meko, kuya kufuneka undwendwele umcebisi kubudlelwane.
Xa ungathethi. Xa ubandakanyeka kwincoko egwenxa. Xa usoyika ukuthetha, soloko uhamba neqabane lakho kwiigobolondo zamaqanda. Xa uthando okanye isondo lubanjiwe njengesohlwayo lelinye lamaqabane.
Ukuba awuchazi enye yezi zinto zingasentla, kodwa uzifumanise ubuza, “ingaba ndifuna ingcebiso ngomtshato?” Kukho enye imiba yomtshato yokukhulisa intloko embi.
Xa ubona iqabane lakho njengomchasi. Xa uqala ukufihla ulwazi kwiqabane lakho. Xa ucinga (okanye unomtshato). Zonke ezi okanye nayiphi na kwezi zizizathu zokufumana iingcebiso.
Zintathu izizathu ezilungileyo zokufuna ukucetyiswa ngomtshato
Xa omabini amaqabane engakwazi ukusombulula iiyantlukwano zabo
Xa isibini sifumana ukungaboni ngasonye kubudlelwane baso kwaye banolwazi olupheleleyo malunga noxinzelelo ngokuthe ngcembe kubudlelwane babo. Bayazazi izinto abatyhubela kuzo kodwa abanako ukuzilungisa. Eli lixesha elifanelekileyo lokuba umcebisi womtshato abandakanyeke. Isayikholojisti enezakhono iya kuba nakho ukubatyhalela kwicala elifanelekileyo.
Xa elinye lamaqabane linokuthandana
Kunzima kakhulu ukubuyela kwimeko yakho kwaye kuya kuthatha umsebenzi onzima ukuphuma kule meko. Esinye sezizathu eziphambili zokufuna ukucetyiswa ngomtshato kukulungisa ubudlelwane obunengxaki emva kokungathembeki.
Iya kufuna ukuzimisela kunye nokuzibophelela ekuxoleleni iqabane lakho kwaye uqhubeke ebomini. Akukho zindlela zimfutshane ekusombululeni ukungaboni ngasonye. Ukuba amaqabane azimisele ekufumaneni unyango kwaye anyanisekile kwiziqu zabo, banokuwusindisa umtshato wabo ekuweni. Ukuzibophelela ekuvuseleleni ulwalamano kubudlelwane sesinye sezizathu eziphambili zokufuna iingcebiso ngomtshato.
Linyathelo elisempilweni kuwo omabini amaqabane ukuba axhumane nenyani kwaye aqhubeke ebomini babo bomtshato. Ukufuna ingcebiso ngomtshato kuya kukunceda uphonononge kwaye usebenze ngemicimbi yomtshato ngaphakathi kwindawo yokuphilisa.
Xa izibini zifuna ukuhlala kunye kuphela ngenxa yabantwana bazo
Esi sibini sinokuziva ukuba kuya kuba bubulumko ukuqhubeka nokuhlala kunye ngenxa yabantwana baso.
Ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kunceda ukufumana umntu wesithathu abandakanyeke. Izibini ezininzi ziye zaziva ukuba zenze into elungileyo ngokuhlala kunye kwaye ziye zabulela iinkwenkwezi zazo ngokukwazi ukusombulula imicimbi yazo ukuze zizabalazele ubudlelwane obunempilo nobulungileyo.
Nje ukuba izibini zifake kwisizathu esinye okanye ezingaphezulu zokufuna ukolulekwa ngomtshato, baziva ukuba ingcebiso mhlawumbi sesona sigqibo silungileyo phantsi kweemeko zabo kunye nabantwana babo. Ke, esinye sezizathu esibalulekileyo sokucebisa ngomtshato yintsapho eyonwabileyo eguqukayo.
Ukwenza ukhetho lokuya kucebisa ngomtshato kunokubonakala ngathi sisigqibo esikhulu, kubandakanya ukudideka kunye nokukhathazeka, kodwa ingcebiso kwizibini ezinokuba yinzuzo. Lowo uphendula umbuzo othi, “Ngaba ingcebiso iya kuwunceda umtshato wam?”
Ngaba ingcebiso ngobuhlobo iyanceda
Ngaba ingcebiso ngomtshato iyanceda? Ukusebenza kokucebisa ngomtshato kuxhomekeke kwindlela ezingene nzulu ngayo ezi ngxaki zomtshato. Okwangoku, zininzi iintlobo zokucebisa ngomtshato ngokufanelekileyo kubandakanya, unyango lwezibini ezijolise kwiimvakalelo (i-EFT) eziphuhliswe nguGqirha Sue Johnson.
Ngaba iingcebiso ngezibini zingasindisa ubudlelwane?
I-EFT ine-70-75% yokuphumelela kwenqanaba lokuphumelela ekwakheni ubudlelwane obuqhekekileyo nobonakeleyo.
Ke ukuba ufuna ukugcina umtshato wakho, unyango lwezibini ezijolise kwiimvakalelo kunokuba yimpendulo yakho! Ukufumana ukwaneliseka emtshatweni wakho sesinye sezizathu zokufuna iingcebiso ngomtshato, njengoko isenokuba yeyona ndlela ikhawulezayo yokubuyisa umtshato wakho.
Olona hlobo lokucebisa ngobudlelwane luya kukunceda ufunde izifundo ezothusayo ngomtshato nobomi. Oko kuyaphendula, kutheni le nto kuya kufuneka ufumane ingcebiso ngomtshato.
Uninzi lweengcali ezifanelekileyo zokucebisa ubudlelwane ziya kukunceda ufunde ukuba akukho baphumeleleyo okanye abaphulukanga kumdlalo womtshato. Baya kuququzelela ukulungiswa kwetrust, ukuseka imida ehloniphekileyo kunye nokuseka kwakhona imida ephukileyo kubudlelwane.
Ngaba ndifuna uMcebisi ngezeMitshato? Thatha imibuzo