Umxholo
- 1. ndandinesithukuthezi
- 2. Yonke into ayenzayo ngumsebenzi
- 3. Indenze ndaziva ndithembekile kwaye ndifuna
- 4. Waqhatha kuqala
- 5. Ndifuna indlela yokubaleka umtshato wam ongonwabanga
- 6. Khange ndiyicwangcise
- Uxela njani ukuba umfazi uyakopa
- Ungafundi ngendlela enzima, kutheni abafazi bekopa
Ukuba usakholelwa ekubeni uninzi lwamadoda luyakopela, unyanisile ukuya kuthi ga kwinqanaba elithile, kodwa inyani kukuba kule mihla ukungathembeki phakathi kwabafazi kuxhaphake kakhulu.
Ngapha koko, uphando lubonakalisile ukuba malunga ne-14% yabasetyhini abatshatileyo bayabakhohlisa abayeni babo ngelixa amanani afanayo angamadoda ayi-22%. Ezi mpendulo, kukangaphi abantu ababhinqileyo bekhohlisa.
Nangona amadoda nabafazi besaziwa ngokukhohlisa, amaxesha amaninzi izizathu zokwenza oko zahluke kakhulu. Masiphonononge esona sizathu siphambili sokungathembeki kwabasetyhini kunye nokungathembeki kwamadoda.
Kumadoda, ihlala ijolise ngakumbi kulonwabo lomzimba, ngelixa kwabasetyhini kugxilwe kubuhlobo obusondeleyo beemvakalelo.
Oku kubuza umbuzo, yintoni eyenza ukuba abafazi bakhohlise kumaqabane abo?
Eli nqaku liza kuxubusha ngezinye zezizathu ezityhilayo ezinikezelwa ngabafazi zokukopa. Funda kunye ukwazi ezona zizathu zokuba kutheni abantu abatshatileyo bekopa.
Nasi isizathu sokuba abafazi babe nemicimbi
1. ndandinesithukuthezi
Kumfazi, ukuba nesithukuthezi ngelixa utshatile kubonakala njengokuphoxeka kokugqibela.
Ngaba awutshati ukuze uhlale unomhlobo osenyongweni ngamaxesha onke, kwaye ungaze uphinde ube nesithukuthezi?
Okulusizi kukuba akusoloko kusebenza njalo, kwaye ke oku sesinye sezona zizathu zibangela ukuba abasetyhini bafune intuthuzelo kwenye indawo.
Xa kukho ukunqongophala kwengqwalaselo kunye nokusondelelana kubudlelwane bomtshato yirisithi yokungathembeki.
Umntu obhinqileyo ongenalo ubudlelwane bakhe kufuneka ahlangatyezwe ngokobuhlobo, ukubamba komzimba, ukujongana nengqondo kunye neemvakalelo, usengozini kakhulu.
Ukuba indoda ethile enenkathalo iyeza kwaye iqala ukumnika imfesane, ingqwalaselo, kunye nokuncoma anqwenela ukukwenza, unokungena ngokulula kwimicimbi yeemvakalelo enokuthi ibe lixesha elinikiweyo lomzimba.
2. Yonke into ayenzayo ngumsebenzi
Ngamanye amaxesha amadoda angacinga ukuba okoko nje besebenza nzima kwaye bezisa imali yokuxhasa ubomi obutofotofo, abafazi babo bayonwaba kwaye bayonwaba. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, yintoni enye onokuyifuna umfazi?
Ngokwenyani, okuninzi!
Ukuba indoda ifika ekhaya emva kwexesha yonke imihla kwaye idiniwe kakhulu ukuba ingabinayo nayiphi na incoko enomdla kunye nenkosikazi yayo, ngokuqinisekileyo iya kufumanisa ukuba sele ikhathazekile, ingakhathali kwaye ikude.
Xa indoda ikhoboka lomsebenzi, inokuthi isebenzise umsebenzi wayo ukunqanda ukudibana ngokweemvakalelo nomfazi kunye nosapho.
Kwaye emveni kwakho konke, njengoko kuchaziwe apha ngasentla, ukubandakanyeka ngokweemvakalelo kuko konke malunga nomntu wasetyhini. Ke kwakhona, kwimeko apho indoda isebenza ngalo lonke ixesha, inkosikazi iba yeyona nto ijolise kuyo kwezithandani.
Jonga kwakhona:
3. Indenze ndaziva ndithembekile kwaye ndifuna
Kuyaziwa ukuba uninzi lwabasetyhini banengxaki yokuzithemba nokuzithemba ngokubanzi.
Zininzi izizathu zoku kwaye zihlala zimiliselwe ebuntwaneni ngandlela thile.
Inokuchaphazela nabani na, nkqu nabasetyhini abanomtsalane, abanomdla kunye nabanamava ngamanye amaxesha baziva bengathandeki kwaye bengafanelekanga.
Ezi mvakalelo zingathandekiyo zinokuxhokonxwa liqabane elingakhathaliyo nelifuna ngenkani okanye elihlukumezayo.
Emva koko khawufane ucinge ukuba umntu othandekayo osebenza naye uyaqaphela (kwaye ayazise ukuba uyaqaphela) iimpawu ezintle kulo mfazi.
Ukungxama kokuzithemba kunye nemvakalelo yokunqweneleka inokuba yinto enxilisayo, njengomoya wesidlo esiphekwe ekhaya kumntu olambileyo.
Abasetyhini abaninzi banemicimbi kuba ibenza bazive ngcono ngokungathi basenomtsalane kwaye befunwa ngumntu, kwaye oko kukonyusa ukuzithemba kwabo.
4. Waqhatha kuqala
Ke ngoku sifika kwigama elincinci elibi elibizwa ngokuba 'kukuziphindezela' sesinye sezizathu eziphambili zokuba abafazi bakhohlise kubayeni babo.
Umyeni ukhohlisile kwaye wafumanisa.
Intlungu yayibuhlungu, ukungcatshwa, iiyure kunye neeyure zokuphindaphinda yonke into ayiphosileyo, kunye nehlazo nokuhlaziswa awayekuva, ngandlela thile wayengakulungelanga oko.
Kodwa wayeguqukile kwaye bagqiba kwelokuba bayilungise kwaye baqhubeke.
Wayecinga ukuba uyibeke ngasemva kwakhe, kodwa bekuhlala kubonakala ngathi kukuzimela ngasemva kwengqondo yakhe emva koko wadibana nale ndoda intle kwaye babonakala ngathi 'bacofa' kususela kusuku lokuqala, wayemqonda ngathi akaze abekho.
Inye into eyakhokelela kwenye, kwaye ngalo lonke elixesha wayezixelele, "Uqale ngokuqhatha - ukuba angayenza, nam ndingayenza."
5. Ndifuna indlela yokubaleka umtshato wam ongonwabanga
Abanye abantu basetyhini bacinga ukuba ukuba bayathandana kuya kusebenza njengohlobo 'lwesicwangciso sokuphuma' kumtshato ongonwabanga nongasebenzi kakuhle.
Inqanawa yabo yomtshato iyatshona, ke ngaphambi kokuba bazibone sele bentywiliselwe emanzini abandayo abandayo nokungatshati, bayatsiba kwinqanawa kwaye bakopela nenye indoda.
Oku kunokufeza injongo yokuphelisa umtshato wabo kodwa kusenokwenzeka ukuba lenze umntu othandana naye azive esetyenziswa.
Ukuthandana kunokuba sisikhalo soncedo, ukuzama ukubonisa umyeni ongaphenduliyo ukuba unengxaki kangakanani emtshatweni, ngethemba lokuba angakulungela ukutshintsha afumane uncedo.
Zininzi iindlela zokujongana nomtshato ongonwabisiyo, kodwa ukuthandana akunakulunga.
6. Khange ndiyicwangcise
Kukho intetho enobulumko ehamba nento enje, "Ukuba uyasilela ukucwangcisa, uceba ukusilela."
Oku kuyinyani ngakumbi xa kufikwa kumba wokuba nomtshato ophumelelayo.
Ngaphandle kokuba ucwangcise ukwenza olona lwalamano lwakho kunye neqabane lakho, ulinike konke onako kwaye uhlala ufuna iindlela onokuthi uqinise ubudlelwane bakho, ekuhambeni kwexesha uya kukwazi ukwahlukana.
Yicinge njenge gadi: ngosuku lwakho lomtshato igadi yakho yayihonjisiwe kwaye ingenachaphaza, neebhedi zeentyatyambo ziqhakazile, ingca yayichetywe kakuhle nemithi yeziqhamo egcwele iziqhamo.
Kodwa ngokuhamba kwamaxesha kunye namaxesha, awukhathalelanga isitiya, ushiye ingca ingachetywanga, khange uzihluphe ngokususa ukhula okanye unkcenkceshele iintyatyambo, vumela iziqhamo ezivuthiweyo ziwele emhlabeni.
Mhlawumbi ubucinga ukuba imvula nomoya uza kukwenzela umsebenzi? Hayi, njengayo yonke into exabisekileyo ebomini, umtshato ngumsebenzi onzima.
Umsebenzi oncomekayo kwaye onomvuzo, kodwa uyasebenza, kwaye nobabini kufuneka nizinikele ngokupheleleyo.
Ukuba akunjalo, umcimbi usenokuthi 'uvele nje' kwaye uzibone sele usithi, "Bendingayicwangcisanga."
Uxela njani ukuba umfazi uyakopa
Xa ufumene induduzo kwiingalo zomfazi wamaphupha akho, into yokugqibela ofuna ukuyenza kukujonga izizathu zokuba kutheni abantu basetyhini bekopa okanye imiqondiso yomfazi ofuna imicimbi.
Nangona kunjalo, kunye nokuthatha isishwankathelo sezizathu ekwabelwana ngazo kweli nqaku ezingqinelanayo, "kutheni abafazi bekopa", kubalulekile ukuziqhelanisa neempawu zokukopela umfazi wakho kuwe kwaye ujonge naziphi na ezi flegi zibomvu kubudlelwane bakho .
Ukufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho liyakukhohlisa kubuhlungu, kodwa ungathanda ukwazi inyani kunokuhlala ulibele. Kunene?
Asikukhuthazi ukuba uye kwinyukliya kwiqabane lakho, ubakrokrela ukuba bayakukhohlisa ngaphandle kwezizathu zesimangalo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ubona ngathi into ethile icinyiwe kwaye ubudlelwane bunokubaleka emhlabeni, ukuthatha isitokhwe seempawu zokukopa kunokuba luncedo.
Kuyacaca ukuba umfazi okanye intombi yakho iyakukhohlisa
- Ukuba ujongile ubudlelwane, uya kulwa rhoqo
- Unengqondo malunga negama lokugqitha kunye nokusetyenziswa phambi kwakho
- Uhlala ethetha ngokuba kubudlelwane obungonwabisiyo
- Ngokukhawuleza uxhalabele inkangeleko yakhe kunye nokuzilungisa
- Ucebisa ityala lakhe lokukopela kuwe
- Uchitha ixesha elininzi kude nawe
- Uyakuphepha ukuzihlalela kunye nawe
- Iprofayile yakhe yemidiya yoluntu ayibonisi imifanekiso yakho emibini
- Akakufaki kuhambo lwakhe, naphina
- Ulwalamano lwakho luye lwaba ngumhlobo
Ungafundi ngendlela enzima, kutheni abafazi bekopa
Kula madoda afunda eli nqaku kwaye azive enomdla wokwazi ngakumbi malunga namandla okukhohlisa kwabasetyhini, okanye kutheni le nto abantu basetyhini benemicimbi xa kubonakala ngathi ngumtshato owonwabileyo ngokugqibeleleyo, indawo elungileyo onokuthi uqale ngayo kukuqonda ngcono abantu basetyhini.
Ukufumana ukuqonda ngakumbi ngezizathu ezinceda ukucacisa ubunzima abasetyhini abanabo emtshatweni kunye nokunyaniseka kwexesha elide, kuyacetyiswa ukuba amadoda afunde ukungathembeki kwabasetyhini: Ukuhlala eLimbo: Oko Kuthethwa ngabafazi Ngokwenyani Xa besithi “Andonwabanga.
Incwadi ingena nzulu kwimimandla yengqondo yokungathembeki kwabasetyhini kwaye iphendula imibuzo efanelekileyo enje, kutheni abafazi bekopa, yintoni eyenzekayo engqondweni yomfazi okopela indoda, kwaye kutheni abafazi bekopela kumadoda alungileyo angababoneleli bokuzinza kwezezimali kunye nokuqinisekiswa kwezentlalo kubo.
Kutheni abafazi bekopa? Wonke umntu wasetyhini unezizathu ezahlukeneyo zokophula kwakhe ubudlelwane.
Umbuzo, kutheni le nto abafazi bekopa beza kuvusa iimpendulo ezahlukeneyo.
Xa isithandane sichitha ubudlelwane, sibushiye kwindawo enamatye umonakalo omkhulu wokulungiswa.
Kodwa, ukuze ubudlelwane buphumelele kwaye bangafi, kubalulekile ukuba uqonde ukuba yintoni eqhuba umfazi ukuba abambelele kwenye indoda.
Musa ukulinda ukuba ufunde ngendlela enzima, kutheni abafazi bekopela.
Yiba liqabane kubudlelwane onokuthatha amanyathelo okulungisa ukutshintsha ibali malunga nokukhumbula ukuba kutheni abafazi bekopa kwaye yintoni enokwenziwa ukuthintela ukungathembeki emtshatweni.
Ukufunda okuhambelana: Izizathu ezi-7 ezityhila ukuba kutheni abantu basetyhini bekhohlisa kumaqabane abo