Umxholo
- Ukuqala kakubi kwintetho
- Ukunganaki kakhulu
- Izakhono zokunxibelelana
- Ukungabikho kwephulo
- Amalungiselelo amabi kwixesha lokuqala
- Ukunikezela kwangethuba
- Ukuba nomdla kubudala kunye nokubonakala
- Inkulu kubantu abaxakekileyo
- Indawo efanelekileyo yokudibana nabantu abatsha
- Ixabiso eliphantsi
- Hayi phantsi koxinzelelo lokukhetha iqabane
- Ithuba lokudibana neqabane
- Ukhatywa kancinci
- Ityekele ekuthandeni kujongeka njengokuhambelana
- Ukuthandana ngokukhawuleza kuxhomekeke kwimbonakalo kunye nokubonakala kokuqala kunokulahlekisa
- Awunakho ukulawula ukuba ngubani oza kumcimbi
- Umsantsa kolindelo kunye nenjongo
- Ukungathembeki
- Amaxabiso ahlukeneyo kunye neenkolelo
Ukuthandana ngesantya esiphezulu, okuyinkqubo yokutshatisa, ngenjongo yokukhuthaza abangatshatanga ukuba bahlangane namaqabane anokubakho ngexesha elifutshane kakhulu, sele kuthandwa kakhulu kula maxesha.
Kodwa zeziphi iimpazamo eziqhelekileyo ezenziwa ngabathathi-nxaxheba?
Zithini izinto ezilungileyo nezingeloncedo isantya ukuthandana?
Kule nqaku, siza kujonga kanye loo nto kwaye singene nzulu ukubona iingxaki ezinokuvela kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu abathandanayo abathandanayo. Okokuqala, masiqale ngokujonga kwiimpazamo eziqhelekileyo ezenziwa ngabathathi-nxaxheba.
Iimpazamo kufuneka uziphephe xa unomhla wesantya
Ukuqala kakubi kwintetho
Ukungabinayo indlela enomdla yokuqalisa incoko kuya kukubona uqala ngemibuliso elula. Le ndlela yomhla wesantya ayizukusa kude kwaye omnye umntu uya kuphulukana nomdla kwincoko.
Oku kuya kukhokelela ekubeni ufumanise encinci okanye akukho nto inomdla ngomnye umntu.
Ukunganaki kakhulu
Qiniseka ukuba uyakuphepha ukungakhathali.
Ukungakhathali akuyi kukuzisela amanqaku amaninzi kodwa kuya kukubonisa njengomntu ongathandekiyo ongaliboni icala lezinto.
Zama ke ukuba nethemba njengoko abantu abanomdla bekholisa ukutsala abantu.
Izakhono zokunxibelelana
Ngenxa yexesha elilinganiselweyo elabelwe incoko nganye ngexesha lesantya, kuya kufuneka uqiniseke ukuba incoko ihlala iyincoko hayi i-monologue apho kulawula khona iseshoni iphela.
Ukulawula incoko kuya kwenza ukuba omnye umntu akujonge njengesiqu sakho okanye onovalo.
Ukungabikho kwephulo
Kuqhelekile ukuba amadoda akhokele, ke xa uthatha inxaxheba kwisantya sokuthandana, bonisa inyathelo lokuqala kwaye ulawule inyathelo.
Unemibono ephathekayo malunga nento oyifunayo ngexesha leseshoni yokuthandana.
Amalungiselelo amabi kwixesha lokuqala
Ukuba uza kuthatha inxaxheba kumhla wokuqala wesantya qiniseka ukuba ulungiselela ngokwaneleyo.
Cela iingcebiso zokuthandana kunye neengcebiso zokuthandana kubahlobo abanamava okanye bajonge kwi-intanethi.
Uninzi lwabathathi-nxaxheba, nkqu nabathathi-nxaxheba abaqhelekileyo, beziganeko zokuthandana ngokukhawuleza bayasilela ukulungiselela umsitho. Ngenxa yamalungiselelo angonelanga, aba bantu baphela bexakekile ngexesha lomsitho kwaye bagqibela ngokungafumani nkqu ngokwengcebiso yokuthandana kulo msitho.
Ukunikezela kwangethuba
Umsebenzi wokufumana umntu olungileyo awusoze ube lula kwaye awusoze ube lula.
Ukuba uphoxekile kumhla wokuqala wesantya, ayisiyiyo imeko yokuba yonke imihla yesantya esiya kulandela iya kuvela iyafana.
Khumbula ukuba ufuna ubudlelwane obonwabileyo, hayi ubudlelwane obuzaliswe ziingxaki. Ke musa ukuyeka ngokukhawuleza kuba ukwenza oko akunakunceda kwimfuno yakho yokufumana umntu olungileyo.
Ukuba nomdla kubudala kunye nokubonakala
Kuya kufuneka ujonge ukuhambelana nomnye umntu kwaye apho unomdla oqhelekileyo ngokuchasene nembonakalo kunye nobudala. Ukugxila kwinkangeleko kunye nobudala kuya kubangela ukuba ulahlekelwe liqabane elinokubakho.
Ke kwixesha elizayo xa uthatha isigqibo sokuthatha inxaxheba kumnyhadala wokuthandana ngesantya, musa ukulandela ipakethi egxila ekubukekeni kwaye ekugqibeleni uphulukane nomntu onokuthi enze iqabane elinothando nelikhathalayo.
Vula nje kwaye usebenzise ixesha kwaye uzame ukufunda malunga nobuntu bomnye umntu kunye nobuntu bakhe.
Iinkqubo zokuthandana ngokukhawuleza
Inkulu kubantu abaxakekileyo
Ezi ziganeko zilungile kwabo baneshedyuli exakekileyo engenalo ixesha lokujikeleza ujonge imihla emitsha.
Uninzi lwaba bantu alufumani xesha lokudibana. Xa befuna ukuthandana iingcebiso kungenzeka ukuba bajolise kwezi zantya zithandanayo njengoko zithatha ixesha elifutshane. Abantu abanjalo baya kwezi ziganeko ngethemba lokufumana iqabane elifanelekileyo abaya kuba nolwalamano oluhle kunye nabo.
Indawo efanelekileyo yokudibana nabantu abatsha
Imihla yesantya ziindawo ezilungileyo zokudibana nabantu abatsha abafana nawe ngokweempawu zobuntu.
Ama-introverts, umzekelo, aya kubona olu hlobo lokuthandana njengethuba elihle lokudibana neqabane elifana nabo njengokuzibandakanya nabantu kwilizwe lokwenyani ngumceli mngeni kubo.
Ixabiso eliphantsi
Speed ukuthandana ayibizi kwaye ipokotho-inobuhlobo ke ukuba ufuna into enokubangela ubudlelwane obonwabisayo kwaye kwangaxeshanye kungabizi kakhulu yeyakho le.
Hayi phantsi koxinzelelo lokukhetha iqabane
Ngaphandle kokuba unomdla kwaye uthathe isigqibo sokukhetha iqabane, umntu akaze abe phantsi koxinzelelo lokukhetha iqabane kwisantya sokuthandana. Ke sukuya kwisantya sokuthandana nomcimbi wokuba kufuneka ufumane iqabane.
Ukuba awunethamsanqa emva koko fumana nje ezinye iingcebiso zokuthandana kunye neengcebiso zokuthandana ezinikezelwayo, emva koko uye kwesinye isantya sokuthandana.
Ithuba lokudibana neqabane
Uninzi lwabantu luye lwadibana namaqabane abo kwiminyhadala enjalo kwaye baqhubela phambili ukuba kubudlelwane obonwabisayo. Ke yiba nesimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo xa uzimasa iminyhadala enjalo kwaye ukuba enye ayizukuphuma ngendlela obuyilindele ngayo, musa ukunikezela kodwa qhubeka uzama de ufumane iqabane elifanelekileyo.
Ukhatywa kancinci
Ukuba esinye isizathu okanye esinye ukhetho lwakho alukhethi, ngekhe utyale imali eninzi ngokwexesha, imali okanye iimvakalelo.
Bendlela isantya ukuthandana
Ityekele ekuthandeni kujongeka njengokuhambelana
Ukukhawulezisa ukuthandana kuthanda abathathi-nxaxheba abajongeka benobuntu obuphumayo.
Oku kungenxa yokuba abathathi-nxaxheba abaninzi bajonge ukubukeka kwamaqabane abo ngokuchasene nokuhambelana. Oku kushiya abo bathathi-nxaxheba bangathandanga ngokukodwa okanye abo baneentloni, bengafumani sabelo silungileyo kwimisitho enjalo.
Ukuthandana ngokukhawuleza kuxhomekeke kwimbonakalo kunye nokubonakala kokuqala kunokulahlekisa
Lo mntu ukuchukumisileyo kwimizuzu emihlanu yokuqala unokuvela abe slug emva kweeveki ezimbalwa zokuthandana.
Ngexesha elizayo xa uthatha inxaxheba kumnyhadala wokuthandana ngesantya esiphezulu, gcinani engqondweni ukuba ubudlelwane obonwabisayo abuyomphumo wenkangeleko yomzimba kodwa ngabo bobabini bayahambelana.
Awunakho ukulawula ukuba ngubani oza kumcimbi
Kufana nokuya kumhla ongaboniyo kunye nokuqiniseka kuphela ukuba kuya kubakho umntu oza kudibana naye.
Ngalo lonke ixesha usiya kwimisitho enjalo zilungiselele nantoni na. Ukuba akukho mntu uhlangabezana nolindelo lwakho, uphela uziva ngathi umoshe ixesha lakho uthatha inxaxheba kumnyhadala.
Umsantsa kolindelo kunye nenjongo
Nangona iinjongo zakho zokuzimasa umsitho womhla wesantya zinokucaca, iinjongo zomnye umntu zisenokungacaci.
Kweminye kuya kuba ukulibala malunga nolwalamano lwangaphambili, abanye ukufumana iqabane lokuzonwabisa kunye nexesha elifutshane ngelixa abanye befumana ukufumana iqabane lomphefumlo.
Ukungathembeki
Emva kokufumana ubudlelwane kunye neqabane elikhawulezayo lokuthandana ungakhange uthathe ixesha lokuba wazi ngcono, unokuza kamva ufunde kumanyano ukuba elo yayingeloqabane lakho lilungileyo kuwe.
Ngenxa yoko, ezi zibini ngamanye amaxesha ziqala ukukhangela iziyolo kwenye indawo njengoko zingonwabanga.
Amaxabiso ahlukeneyo kunye neenkolelo
Elinye iqabane linokuba neenqobo ezahlukeneyo zokuziphatha kunye neenkolelo zonqulo eziya kubonakala emva kokungena kubudlelwane obubalulekileyo.
Ukuba lo mahluko awuphathwanga ngokufanelekileyo ngengcebiso yobudlelwane okanye unxibelelwano olusempilweni, oluvulekileyo, izibini zinokuphela zoqhekeka kwaye zizibuyisele apho ziqale khona.
Ukuthandana ngokukhawuleza kunokuba ngumceli mngeni kumaxesha okuqala, kodwa ngokuhamba kunye nangamalungiselelo, ngokufuna zombini iingcebiso zokuthandana kunye neengcebiso zokuthandana uya kuthi ekugqibeleni ube ngcono kuzo.
Le ndlela yokuthandana ikwazile ukwanelisa ubudlelwane. Ke ukuba awukenzi isigqibo sokuba uza kuthatha inxaxheba kwenye okanye hayi, ingcebiso yam yile, qhubeka uzame. Ithamsanqa lakho lisenokuba lilindile apho.